Right and Wrong: What Guides Many

Almost everyone agrees that some actions are clearly right or definitely wrong. For example, murder, rape, and child sexual abuse are widely condemned, while fairness, kindness, and empathy are widely praised. But in other areas of life​—even situations involving sexuality, honesty, or parenting—​many people believe that there is no right or wrong option. They think that almost any choice is acceptable. People often make their decisions based on how they feel and how those around them feel about the matter. Is that always a reliable approach?

HOW WE FEEL

We are often guided by how we feel, or our internal sense of right and wrong, which is commonly called our conscience. (Romans 2:14, 15) Even from a young age, children can recognize the difference between fair and unfair behavior and even feel guilt. Over time, our conscience is shaped by the values we learn from our family, peers, teachers, community, religion, and culture. When we make decisions, our conscience tells us whether our choice matches our values or not.

Our sense of right and wrong can move us to show empathy, gratitude, fairness, and compassion toward others. It can also hold us back from doing things that could hurt those we care about or that might cause us embarrassment, shame, and guilt.

Is how we feel always a reliable guide? As a young man, Garrick pursued a life where, as he said, “I could establish my own standards.” He found, however, that doing what he felt was right did not lead to good results. He came to embrace a lifestyle that he later described as “a very dark path of immorality, drug abuse, drunkenness, and a lot of violence.”

HOW OTHER PEOPLE FEEL

In addition to our own feelings, we are often guided by how others will view our decisions. That can allow us to benefit from their experience and wisdom. We win the respect of our family, friends, and community when we do what they think is right.

Is how other people feel always a reliable guide? As a young woman, Priscila did what was popular among her peers and freely engaged in premarital sex. She found, though, that doing what others view as right did not make her happier. She said: “Doing what everyone else was doing didn’t make me feel good. It led me to take unwise and careless risks.”

IS THERE A BETTER WAY?

When we decide between right and wrong, our feelings and the feelings of others play a valuable role. But that guidance alone does not always lead to a good outcome. We can become victims of our own shortsightedness, failing to see the harm that our choices may cause to us or others. (Proverbs 14:12) And there is no guarantee that our values or the values of those around us are truly good for us and will not need to change. After all, certain behavior once viewed as wrong is now commonly accepted, while conduct previously thought of as acceptable is now viewed as improper.

Is there a better guide for deciding what is right and what is wrong? Is there a moral standard we can follow today that will not leave us disappointed years from now?

Thankfully, there is a source for consistent and reliable moral guidance that works for everyone everywhere. The next article will discuss where we can find the most reliable guide for determining right and wrong.