Drawing Up “Deep Waters”

A BIBLE proverb states: “Counsel in the heart of a man is as deep waters, but the man of discernment is one that will draw it up.” (Proverbs 20:5) In Bible times it was much harder to get water than it is in many lands today. When Jesus spoke to the Samaritan woman, she was hauling up water from Jacob’s fountain, a well that was some 75 feet [23 m] deep!—John 4:5-15.

As Proverbs 20:5 indicates, the discernment needed to elicit the deep thoughts and feelings harbored in a person’s heart is much like the effort required to draw water from a well. This is true in most areas of life. For example, likely you know individuals who over many years have built up a wealth of knowledge and experience. If these are not inclined to volunteer unsolicited advice, you may need to draw them out. By showing interest, asking questions, and tactfully probing, you will, as it were, be letting down your bucket into a deep well of wisdom.

The counsel of Proverbs 20:5 also holds true in the family. Often, wives are heard to say: “My husband doesn’t tell me how he feels!” A husband might say: “My wife just gives me the silent treatment!” In such situations, discernment is needed to draw up the thoughts that are deep in a spouse’s heart. Tactful questions (Did you have a hard day? What happened? How can I help?) can often initiate heart-to-heart communication. Showing such discernment will strengthen the marriage bond, to the benefit of both husband and wife.