Growing Old With Understanding

A TRUE-LIFE story of an aged Middle Eastern man who had suffered many hardships and disasters closes with the assurance that he died “old and satisfied with days.” He had lived to be well over 140 years of age.​—Job 42:16, 17.

Another man, also in the Middle East, lived to the ripe old age of 175 years. The record says that he “expired and died in a good old age, old and satisfied.” Yes, it is possible for people to live a satisfying life even into their advanced years.​—Genesis 25:7, 8.

At an age we would now consider very old, one of the above-mentioned men volunteered to leave a comfortable urban home and, with his entire household, moved to a different country. The first leg of that journey covered over 600 miles [970 km], and that without the aid of modern transportation. The other man suffered very severe health problems. Both men raised families during their later years.

One of those men saw part of the land in which he was dwelling overrun by the combined armies of five invading kings. He had to muster a force of some 300 men to chase after them and rescue a dearly loved relative. Later, he saw two prosperous cities destroyed by an act of God. Twice, this same man had his beautiful wife temporarily taken from him by powerful kings.

Both of these elderly men​—Job and Abraham—​successfully went through distressing events and yet lived on to be “old and satisfied.” What was their secret?

Modern Problems of Old Age

Are the problems facing older people today really all that different from those experienced by men of old? Don’t some people of advanced age today suffer the loss of wealth or even lose the means to make a living?

Some lose their homes and have to move to unfamiliar surroundings. Close relatives, friends, and marriage mates die. Health problems are a major factor with which to contend. Sadly, some children abandon their parents, withdrawing support and leaving them to fend for themselves.

We need not further rehearse such problems, for they are all too familiar. But we can wisely seek solutions.

Attitudes Toward Aging

A person’s attitude may need to be adjusted; it could be at the root of his unhappiness. For instance, some elderly people insist on living alone well beyond their ability to care for themselves. One woman who was disabled and was living alone on a large piece of property posted a sign on her door that said: “Keep Out!” She felt that all anybody wanted was her money or property; she distrusted everyone.

Such a person is not growing old with understanding. What a sad situation! True, not everybody can be trusted. But how much wiser it is to accept the fact that some can be trusted and to receive the friendship and assistance of those genuinely trying to be helpful!

Some elderly ones may feel that they have lived out their lives. But they are still living, and they will find it beneficial to keep their minds active and to use their thinking abilities to the full. Learning new things is not beyond their capabilities and can be enriching, although it may take longer for them to learn than when they were young.

Old Age Is a World of Its Own

A vocational school’s instructions on geriatrics says that older ones need to feel that they have independence of mind and body. They must also feel that they are loved and needed, that they are useful and can do things for themselves. Moreover, those instructions say that the elderly need the sense of belonging that can be had in a family and with friends and that they would benefit from religious association.

What, then, is the best attitude for aging people to display? An optimistic viewpoint can be a real help. One who apparently looked upon old age as a new chapter in life was the 90-year-old mother of a former U.S. president. In her memoirs she wrote: “Old age need not be feared . . . It can be rich and fulfilling . . . The qualities of our later life will be determined by the life we have already shaped.” Such a disposition adds more meaning to the later years of life.

Hence, the previously noted instructions on geriatrics observed that happy oldsters are the ones who have managed to educate themselves by embarking on new and satisfying interests, learning and cultivating challenging hobbies, enjoying meaningful experiences and friendships, learning to appreciate life and to live within their physical capabilities.

What about enduring life’s inevitable problems? The book On Growing Old says: “It surely goes without saying that if a man has access to higher values and especially to the power which is inherent in belief he will be better able to endure . . . Old people above all should seek to strengthen their religious bonds.”

Some people put living life to the fullest ahead of everything else. One white-haired 61-year-old indulged a passion for high-powered motorcycles by being a member of a motorcycle club exclusively for people over 40. Of course, Awake! does not recommend motorcycles for the aged!

One elderly couple has a motto: “Don’t be miserable about your age​—and don’t fold up when you retire.” Living up to that motto, they pedaled bicycles from Los Angeles to New York in 1980. During the four years following their retirement in 1976, the man, 69, and his wife, 64, biked more than 15,500 miles [25,000 km] through Canada, the United States, Norway, Belgium, Holland, Germany, France, and Britain. Here too we are not recommending that someone fill his life with such pursuits, as that could leave little or no time for learning about and being involved in the true worship of God. But this example does demonstrate that some older people have a great capacity for living.

Productive activity and doing things for others can help a person to grow old gracefully. A group of retired craftsmen, some over 70, kept up their skills by providing low-cost home repairs for pensioners in the Greater Vancouver, Canada, area. Concerning the effect this work had on the craftsmen themselves, one man said: “It’s good therapy. It keeps them active.” The newspaper report said they are “not tired, just retired.” These men also think that watching TV for the rest of one’s life is only for the very tired.

The Role of Appreciation

Appreciation for life comes into the picture too. An alert 87-year-old from British Columbia, Canada, showed much appreciation for just being alive. His maxim for growing old with understanding was: “Keep an active mind, and remain young at heart. Live one day at a time.” He never actually prepared ahead for old age but simply kept busy in the open air tending his fruit trees. To adapt to his changed circumstances, he maintained a lively interest in other people and always endeavored to keep abreast of the news.

Even though the position of older persons in the family and in society undergoes change, there is no need for them to lose all interest in life or to fall into deep mental depression. If friends and relatives are supportive at this time, it can do a great deal of good, for in this way oldsters can share their experiences and pleasures. An elderly man who lives alone in his own home in British Columbia commented: “If older people are neglected by their families, there is a tendency to live in the past, and this is not good.” He appreciates his widespread family and their faithfulness in keeping in touch. “The telephone,” he said, “is a wonderful instrument for older persons.”

One man forced into early retirement by severe heart problems commented on the danger of living in the past. His life had been a very active one, managing a successful business as well as serving as an appointed elder in a congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Did he live with regrets over lost activities? “No,” he said, “not really. I’m satisfied that I did my best. I laid the groundwork for others to build on.”

This man’s relationship with his married daughters and their families has, in his words, become a “closer closeness” as the years have rolled by. He and his wife appreciate their loved ones and have learned to leave the family decisions of their grown children where they belong​—with those adults. Failure to do so would only cause friction and unhappiness, plus the well-known in-law problem.

How much joy is missed by grandparents if their role is not appreciated! But what happiness comes with hearing a grandchild say, as this grandfather did after a long session in the hospital: “Bompa! Where have you been? We’ve missed you!”

Because selfishness and lack of natural affection are so prominent in today’s world, not all sick and aging people have the moral and physical support so much needed to face problems with serenity. This is how the supervisor of an acute-care center in Canada appraised the situation: “Many of these older persons leave a lovely home to come here, where they only have a bed and cupboard. When they leave, via the undertaker, all that remains is one small box containing all their worldly possessions. It is a traumatic experience.” Yet, in certain cases these facilities may be the only answer for families seeking care for their aged loved ones.

Facing the Future With Understanding

According to some prognosticators, the time will come when a medical prescription will combat aging, just as some other health problems are controlled today. But do such will-o’-the-wisp predictions of imperfect men provide a real, sustaining hope for a person whose life span is nearing “threescore years and ten” or “fourscore years”?​—Psalm 90:10, King James Version.

Thousands of older folk have found life-sustaining hope in God’s Word, the Bible. They now trust in the sure promises of “the Ancient of Days,” Jehovah God. (Daniel 7:9, 13) One such promise is that an older person’s flesh will “become fresher than in youth,” and he will “return to the days of his youthful vigor.” (Job 33:25) Even those sleeping in death will awaken to that kind of life in God’s righteous new world, which will soon replace the present unsatisfying system of things. (Acts 24:15; 2 Peter 3:13) It was this sound hope that enabled Abraham and Job to live out their days “old and satisfied.”

Truly, living today according to such heart-satisfying values is like building a bank account for the future. Too, by having a supportive family and friends and suitable activities, an older person can thrive. Above all, a close relationship with the One who has promised relief from aging and death makes it possible to grow old with understanding. Indeed, those having God’s favor “will still keep on thriving during gray-headedness.”​—Psalm 92:14.