Fulfilling a Basic Human Need Through Recognition

A SINCERE “Well done!” “Good for you!” or “You did your best; we’re proud of you” does much to boost self-esteem, especially when it comes from someone you respect. Humans thrive on recognition. With it, they do better and are happier. Indeed, deserved recognition is as vital to the mind and heart as wholesome food is to the body.

One dictionary defines recognition as “acceptance of an individual as being entitled to consideration or attention” and “special notice or attention.” It is closely related to respect, the feeling of esteem, which when given implies a reasoned estimation or evaluation of a person and the measure of recognition due him.

Recognition​—A Basic Need

Giving credit where credit is due is reasonable and fair. Jesus set the pattern in his illustration of the slaves to whom the master entrusted his belongings. In acknowledging the proper management of his assets, he said: “Well done, good and faithful slave!” (Matthew 25:19-23) Very often, however, this deserved courtesy is overlooked. Failure to give recognition stifles enthusiasm and initiative. Iona puts it this way: “Recognition makes you feel needed, wanted, and appreciated . . . It gives you initiative. If you are overlooked, you feel dejected and let down.” Patrick adds: “Then it is difficult to maintain a high level of quality and output.” How vital, therefore, that we learn how and when to give recognition. All of us crave the security of knowing that we belong. It is a basic human need.

A word of praise, added responsibility, or even a material gift stimulates you to continue to do your best. This is true whether you are a parent, husband, wife, child, congregation member, or overseer. “When granted recognition,” says Margaret, “I feel happy, needed, and I have a desire to do better.” Andrew concurs, saying: “My spirit soars, providing stimulus to work even harder.” However, to bestow recognition and respect upon someone requires careful thought and good judgment.

Imitate Jehovah’s Pattern in Bestowing Recognition

The foremost example of recognizing the worth of others is Jehovah God. He acknowledges those who are deserving of recognition. He noticed such men as Abel, Enoch, and Noah. (Genesis 4:4; 6:8; Jude 14) Jehovah acknowledged David for his outstanding faithfulness. (2 Samuel 7:16) Samuel, who as a prophet honored Jehovah for years, was in turn honored by God, who quickly responded to Samuel’s prayer for help to defeat the Philistines. (1 Samuel 7:7-13) Would you not feel honored to have such divine recognition?

Gratitude and appreciation are closely linked with recognition. The Bible urges us to ‘show ourselves thankful’ and to be grateful for what is done in our behalf. (Colossians 3:15; 1 Thessalonians 5:18) While this specifically applies to thankfulness to Jehovah, the same is true in day-to-day matters of life. The apostle Paul appreciated this. He gave recognition to Phoebe as “a defender of many” and to Prisca and Aquila for ‘risking their necks’ in his behalf and in behalf of others. (Romans 16:1-4) Imagine how they must have felt upon receiving such openly expressed gratitude. It was also good for Paul to have the happiness of giving recognition, honor, and encouragement. We too can imitate Jehovah and his appreciative worshipers by showing proper recognition to those to whom it is due.​—Acts 20:35.

Recognition Within the Family Circle

“A little recognition goes a long way in making life enjoyable,” says Mitchell, a husband and Christian elder. “It endears you, probably forever, to the one who gives you recognition.” For example, a Christian husband carries a heavy load of responsibility and makes important decisions that involve the family’s welfare. He must provide for the family’s spiritual, material, and emotional needs. (1 Timothy 5:8) How grateful he is when proper recognition is shown for his God-given assignment as family head and when his wife shows him “deep respect”!​—Ephesians 5:33.

Not to be overlooked is the work of a housewife, which is performed out of the public eye. Modern concepts may downgrade such work and rob it of its dignity and worth. Yet, it is pleasing to God. (Titus 2:4, 5) How refreshing it is when a discerning husband praises his wife, particularly in all aspects of life wherein she excels, granting her such recognition under his headship! (Proverbs 31:28) Rowena says of her husband: “When he acknowledges what I do, I find it easier to be submissive to him and to honor and respect him.”

American educator Christian Bovee once said: “Judicious praise is to children what the sun is to flowers.” Yes, even a very young child needs constant reassurance that he is a valued family member. During the formative teen years, filled with new emotional and physical changes, there is increased self-consciousness about personal appearance, coupled with a hunger for independence and recognition. At this time especially, a teenager needs to feel loved by his parents and to be treated with understanding and human kindness. Aging parents and grandparents likewise need the reassurance that they are still useful and loved, that they have not been ‘thrown away in old age.’ (Psalm 71:9; Leviticus 19:32; Proverbs 23:22) Properly satisfying the need for recognition brings increased happiness and success to the family circle.

Recognition Within the Christian Congregation

There is immeasurable value in cultivating a sincere interest in others in the Christian congregation and freely expressing appreciation for their deeds and efforts. Christian elders should take the lead by acknowledging the accomplishments and efforts of others in the congregation. “It was not until after I received a number of shepherding visits that I realized how much they meant in terms of encouragement, satisfaction, and happiness,” said Margaret. “I realized what is missed out on when general recognition is not given.” What a good reason for showing genuine, loving personal interest in all in the congregation! Recognize their good work. Freely commend and encourage. In many congregations there are single parents who work hard to inculcate spiritual values in their children. Such ones deserve special praise. Highlight the positive rather than the negative. Let others see your brotherly affection for them. Let them see that you care. In this way, loving overseers work to build up the congregation. (2 Corinthians 10:8) Individual members reciprocate by giving deserved recognition and respect to such faithful ones who work hard in their behalf.​—1 Timothy 5:17; Hebrews 13:17.

But there is another side, or angle, to this matter. The desire for recognition is, admittedly, very strong. In Jesus’ day it became a preoccupation among the religious leaders. Jesus had to correct his disciples’ wrong view in this regard. (Mark 9:33-37; Luke 20:46) Christians need reasonableness and balance. If left unchecked, the desire for recognition could be spiritually hazardous. (James 3:14-16) How tragic it would be, for example, if an elder became haughty and began to demand that others accept his own exalted estimate of himself!​—Romans 12:3.

The apostle Paul wisely admonished fellow Christians in Rome: “In brotherly love have tender affection for one another. In showing honor to one another take the lead.” (Romans 12:10) These words apply preeminently to Christian elders, who must at all times recognize Christ as the Head of the congregation. Submission to his right hand of authority is manifested by seeking Christ’s direction by means of the holy spirit, Bible principles, and the lead given by the Governing Body of “the faithful and discreet slave.”​—Matthew 24:45-47; see Revelation 1:16, 20; 2:1.

Thus, when elders meet, and they pray for Jehovah’s guidance to shepherd the flock of God, they will strive to make decisions that are Scripturally sound. Christian modesty, meekness, and humility will prevent any elder from trying to exalt himself, dominate over his brothers, and impose his opinion at these meetings. (Matthew 20:25-27; Colossians 3:12) Whenever possible, the chairman of the elder body would do well to invite input beforehand from fellow elders and then provide an agenda far enough in advance to allow time for careful and prayerful thought to each point itemized. During the elders’ meeting, he would try, not to shape the opinion of the elders, but, rather, to encourage them to exercise “freeness of speech” on matters under discussion. (1 Timothy 3:13) In turn, fellow elders should carefully listen to the expressions of one another and gladly benefit from the insight of elders who have many years of Christian experience.​—Exodus 18:21, 22.

Overseers understand, however, that Christ can use any elder on the body to provide the Bible principles needed to cope with a situation or to make an important decision. A good spirit will prevail among the body when proper recognition is given to each elder for his contribution in caring for the spiritual interests of the congregation.​—Acts 15:6-15; Philippians 2:19, 20.

Work at Giving and Earning Deserved Recognition

Recognition builds up. It encourages and is endearing. “Even if we feel we’re just ordinary,” says Mary, “we need encouragement for our own self-worth.” Sincerely acknowledge the everyday efforts of others. Doing so makes life all the more worthwhile and pleasant for them. Parents, children, overseers, and members of the Christian congregation, you can earn recognition by how you speak and how you act. The Bible speaks favorably of industrious, modest, and humble persons. (Proverbs 11:2; 29:23; Hebrews 6:1-12) Learn to acknowledge graciously the value of others. Take the feelings of others into consideration as you work with them. The apostle Peter gave this admonition: “All of you be like-minded, showing fellow feeling, having brotherly affection, tenderly compassionate, humble in mind.” (1 Peter 3:8) This calls for granting recognition to others, thus fulfilling a basic human need.