your child for any accomplishments, no matter how small. Be generous with commendation. At the same time, do not neglect discipline. Children need structure, and this is all the more true of those who are learning disabled. Let your child know what you expect, and hold to the standards you set.

Finally, learn to view your situation realistically. The book Parenting a Child With a Learning Disability illustrates it this way: “Imagine going to your favorite restaurant and ordering veal scallopini. When the waiter puts the plate in front of you, you discover rack of lamb. They’re both delicious dishes, but you were prepared for the veal. Many parents need to make a mental shift in their thinking. You might not have been prepared for the lamb, but you find it’s wonderful. So it is when you raise children with special needs.”

“Sit Still and Pay Attention!”

Living With Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

“All along, Jim had said that Cal was just spoiled and that if we—meaning me—cracked down on him, he’d shape up. Now here was this doctor telling us that it wasn’t me, it wasn’t us, it wasn’t Cal’s teachers: something really was wrong with our little boy.”

CAL suffers from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), a condition characterized by inattentiveness, impulsive behavior, and hyperactivity. The disorder is estimated to affect from 3 to 5 percent of all school-age children. “Their minds are like TV sets with faulty channel selectors,” says learning specialist Priscilla L. Vail. “One thought leads to another, with no structure or discipline.”

Let us briefly consider three major symptoms of ADHD.

Inattentiveness: The child with ADHD cannot filter out unimportant detail and focus on one topic. Thus, he is easily distracted by extraneous sights, sounds, and smells.a He is paying attention, but no single feature in his environment stands out. He cannot determine which one deserves his primary concentration.

Impulsive behavior: The ADHD child acts before he thinks, without considering the consequences. He shows poor planning and judgment, and at times his actions are dangerous. “He rushes into the street, onto the ledge, up the tree,” writes Dr. Paul Wender. “As a result he receives more than his share of cuts, bruises, abrasions, and trips to the doctor.”

Hyperactivity: Hyperactive children are constantly fidgeting. They cannot sit still. “Even when they are older,” Dr. Gordon Serfontein writes in his book The Hidden Handicap, “careful observation will reveal some form of continuous movement involving the legs, feet, arms, hands, lips or tongue.”

Yet, some children who are inattentive and impulsive are not hyperactive. Their disorder is sometimes referred to simply as Attention Deficit Disorder, or ADD. Dr. Ronald Goldberg explains that ADD “can occur without any hyperactivity at all. Or it can occur with any degree of hyperactivity—from barely noticeable, through rather annoying, to highly disabling.”

What Causes ADHD?

Over the years, attention problems have been blamed on everything from bad parenting to fluorescent lighting. It is now thought that ADHD is associated with disturbances in certain brain functions. In 1990 the National Institute of Mental Health tested 25 adults with ADHD symptoms and found that they metabolized glucose more slowly in the very areas of the brain that control movement and attention. In about 40 percent of ADHD cases, the individual’s genetic makeup seems to play a role. According to The Hyperactive Child Book, other factors that may be associated with ADHD are the use of alcohol or drugs by the mother during pregnancy, lead poisoning, and, in isolated cases, diet.

The ADHD Adolescent and Adult

In recent years doctors have found that ADHD is not just a childhood condition. “Typically,” says Dr. Larry Silver, “parents will bring in a child for treatment and say, ‘I was the same when I was a kid.’ Then they’ll admit they still have problems waiting in line, sitting through meetings, getting things done.” It is now believed that about half of all children with ADHD carry at least some of their symptoms into adolescence and adulthood.

During adolescence, those with ADHD may shift from risky behavior to delinquency. “I used to worry that he wouldn’t get into college,” says the mother of an ADHD adolescent. “Now I just pray that he stays out of jail.” That such fears may be valid is shown by a study comparing 103 hyperactive youths with a control group of 100 children who did not have the disorder. “By their early 20s,” reports Newsweek, “the kids from the hyperactive group were twice as likely to have arrest records, five times as likely to have felony convictions and nine times as likely to have served time in prison.”

For an adult, ADHD poses a unique set of problems. Dr. Edna Copeland says: “The hyperactive boy may turn into an adult who changes jobs frequently, gets fired a lot, fiddles all day and is restless.” When the cause is not understood, these symptoms can strain a marriage. “In simple conversations,” says the wife of a man with ADHD, “he wouldn’t even hear everything I said. It’s like he was always somewhere else.”

Of course, these traits are common to many people—at least to a degree. “You have to ask if the symptoms have always been there,” says Dr. George Dorry. For example, he notes that if a man has been forgetful only since he lost his job or since his wife gave birth, that’s not a disorder.

Furthermore, if one truly has ADHD, the symptoms are pervasive—that is, they affect almost every aspect of the person’s life. Such was the case with 38-year-old Gary, an intelligent, energetic man who could not seem to complete a single task without being distracted. He has already held more than 120 jobs. “I had just accepted the fact that I couldn’t succeed at all,” he said. But Gary and many others—children, adolescents, and adults—have been helped to cope with ADHD. How?

[Footnote]

Meeting the Challenge

OVER the years several treatments have been proposed for ADHD. Some of these have focused on diet. However, some studies suggest that food additives do not usually cause hyperactivity and that nutritional solutions are often ineffective. Other methods of treating ADHD are medication, behavior modification, and cognitive training.a

Medication. Since ADHD apparently involves a brain malfunction, medication for restoring the proper chemical balance has proved helpful to many.b However, medication does not take the place of learning. It merely helps the child focus his attention, giving him a foundation upon which to learn new skills.

Many adults with ADHD have likewise been aided by medication. However, caution is in order—with youths and adults—since some stimulant medication used to treat ADHD can be addictive.

Behavior modification. A child’s ADHD does not absolve parents from the obligation to discipline. Though the child may have special needs in this regard, the Bible admonishes parents: “Train up a boy according to the way for him; even when he grows old he will not turn aside from it.” (Proverbs 22:6) In her book Your Hyperactive Child, Barbara Ingersoll notes: “The parent who simply gives up and lets his hyperactive child ‘run wild’ does the child no favor. Just like any other child, the hyperactive child needs consistent discipline coupled with respect for the child as a person. This means clear limits and appropriate rewards and penalties.”

It is therefore important that parents provide solid structure. Furthermore, there should be a strict routine in daily activities. Parents may wish to give the child some latitude in making up this schedule, including a time for homework, study, bath, and so forth. Then be consistent in following through. Make sure that the daily routine is adhered to. Phi Delta Kappan notes: “Physicians, psychologists, school officials, and teachers have an obligation to the child and the child’s parents to explain that the classification of ADD or ADHD is not a license to get away with anything, but rather an explanation that may lead to legitimate help for the child in question.”

Cognitive training. This includes helping the child to change his view of himself and his disorder. “People with attention-deficit disorder feel ‘ugly, stupid, and bad’ even if they are attractive, intelligent, and good-hearted,” observes Dr. Ronald Goldberg. Therefore, the child with ADD or ADHD needs to have a proper view of his worth, and he needs to know that his attention difficulties can be managed. This is especially important during adolescence. By the time a person with ADHD reaches the teenage years, he may have experienced much criticism from peers, teachers, siblings, and perhaps even from parents. He now needs to set realistic goals and to judge himself fairly rather than harshly.

The above approaches to treatment can also be pursued by adults with ADHD. “Modifications are necessary based on age,” writes Dr. Goldberg, “but the underpinnings of treatment—medication where appropriate, behavior modification, and cognitive [training]—remain valid approaches throughout the life cycle.”

Providing Support

John, the father of an adolescent with ADHD, says to parents in a similar circumstance: “Learn all you can about this problem. Make informed decisions. Above all, love your child, build him up. Low self-esteem is a killer.”

For the child with ADHD to have adequate support, both parents must cooperate. Dr. Gordon Serfontein writes that a child with ADHD needs “to know that he is loved within the home and that the love comes from the love that exists between the parents.” (Italics ours.) Unfortunately, such love is not always demonstrated. Dr. Serfontein continues: “It has been well established that in the family where there is [an ADHD child], there is almost a third higher instance of marital discord and breakdown than in the normal population.” To prevent such discord, the father should play a significant role in raising the child with ADHD. The responsibility should not be placed solely upon the mother.—Ephesians 6:4; 1 Peter 3:7.

Close friends, although not part of the family, can be of tremendous support. How? “Be kind,” says John, quoted earlier. “Look deeper than your eyes can see. Get to know the child. Speak with the parents too. How are they doing? What do they contend with from day to day?”—Proverbs 17:17.

Members of the Christian congregation can do much to be of support to both the child with ADHD and the parents. How? By being reasonable in their expectations. (Philippians 4:5) At times, a child with ADHD may be disruptive. Rather than callously remarking, “Why can’t you control your child?” or “Why don’t you just discipline him?” a perceptive fellow believer will realize that the parents may already be overwhelmed with the daily demands of raising a child with ADHD. Of course, parents should do what they can to limit the child’s disruptive behavior. Nevertheless, instead of lashing out in irritation, those who are related in the faith should strive to show “fellow feeling” and to ‘bestow a blessing.’ (1 Peter 3:8, 9) Indeed, it is often by means of compassionate fellow believers that God “comforts those laid low.”—2 Corinthians 7:5-7.

Students of the Bible realize that all human imperfection, including learning disabilities and ADHD, has been inherited from the first man, Adam. (Romans 5:12) They also know that the Creator, Jehovah, will fulfill his promise to bring about a righteous new world in which distressing sicknesses will no longer exist. (Isaiah 33:24; Revelation 21:1-4) This assurance is an anchor of support to those affected by such disorders as ADHD. “Age, training, and experience are helping our son to understand and to manage his disorder,” says John. “But he will never be totally cured in this system of things. Our daily comfort is that in the new world, Jehovah will correct our son’s disorder and enable him to enjoy life to the full.”