Parents, What Does Your Example Teach?

“Become imitators of God, as beloved children, and go on walking in love.”​—EPHESIANS 5:1, 2.

1. What kind of directions did Jehovah provide for the first human couple?

JEHOVAH is the Originator of the family arrangement. Every family owes its existence to him because he established the first family and gave procreative powers to the first human couple. (Ephesians 3:14, 15) He provided Adam and Eve with basic instructions as to their responsibilities and also allowed them ample opportunity to use personal initiative in carrying these out. (Genesis 1:28-30; 2:15-22) After Adam and Eve sinned, the situations with which families had to cope became more complicated. Still, Jehovah lovingly provided guidelines that would help his servants to deal with such situations.

2. (a) By what means has Jehovah reinforced written counsel with oral instruction? (b) What question do parents need to ask themselves?

² As our Grand Instructor, Jehovah has done much more than provide written directions as to what we should do and what we should avoid. In ancient times he coupled written instruction with oral instruction through the priests and the prophets and through family heads. Who is he using to provide such oral teaching in our day? Christian elders and parents. If you are a parent, are you doing your part to instruct your family in Jehovah’s ways?​—Proverbs 6:20-23.

3. What can family heads learn from Jehovah as to effective teaching?

³ How should such instruction be given within the family? Jehovah sets the pattern. He clearly states what is good and what is bad, and he makes generous use of repetition. (Exodus 20:4, 5; Deuteronomy 4:23, 24; 5:8, 9; 6:14, 15; Joshua 24:19, 20) He employs thought-provoking questions. (Job 38:4, 8, 31) By means of illustrations and real-life examples, he stirs our emotions and molds our hearts. (Genesis 15:5; Daniel 3:1-29) Parents, when you teach your children, do you try to imitate that pattern?

4. What do we learn from Jehovah as to administering discipline, and why is discipline important?

⁴ Jehovah is firm for what is right, but he understands the effects of imperfection. So before he punishes, he teaches and gives repeated warnings and reminders to imperfect humans. (Genesis 19:15, 16; Jeremiah 7:23-26) When he disciplines, he does it to the right extent, not excessively. (Psalm 103:10, 11; Isaiah 28:26-29) If that is the way we deal with our children, it gives evidence that we know Jehovah, and it will be easier for them to come to know him too.​—Jeremiah 22:16; 1 John 4:8.

5. What can parents learn from Jehovah about listening?

⁵ Marvelously, Jehovah listens as a loving heavenly Father. He does not simply issue orders. He encourages us to pour out our hearts to him. (Psalm 62:8) And if the sentiments that we express are not exactly right, he does not thunder a rebuke from heaven. He patiently teaches us. How appropriate, therefore, is the counsel of the apostle Paul: “Become imitators of God, as beloved children”! (Ephesians 4:31–5:1) What a fine example Jehovah sets for parents as they seek to instruct their children! It is an example that reaches our hearts and makes us want to walk in his way of life.

The Influence Exerted by Example

6. How do the attitude and example of parents influence their children?

⁶ In addition to verbal instruction, example has a profound influence on young ones. Whether parents like it or not, their children are going to imitate them. It may please the parents​—sometimes it may shock them—​when they hear their children say things that they themselves have said. When both the conduct and the attitude of the parents reflect deep appreciation for spiritual matters, this exercises a positive influence on the children.​—Proverbs 20:7.

7. What sort of parental example did Jephthah set for his daughter, and with what outcome?

⁷ The effect of parental example is well illustrated in the Bible. Jephthah, who was used by Jehovah to lead Israel to victory over the Ammonites, was also a father. The record of his reply to the king of Ammon indicates that Jephthah must frequently have read the history of Jehovah’s dealings with Israel. He could quote that history freely, and he showed strong faith in Jehovah. No doubt, his example helped his daughter to develop the faith and self-sacrificing spirit that she displayed in undertaking a lifetime of service as a single woman devoted to Jehovah.​—Judges 11:14-27, 34-40; compare Joshua 1:8.

8. (a) What fine attitude did Samuel’s parents manifest? (b) How did that benefit Samuel?

⁸ Samuel was exemplary as a child and faithful to God as a prophet throughout his life. Would you like your children to turn out as he did? Analyze the example set by Samuel’s parents, Elkanah and Hannah. Though the situation in their household was not perfect, they regularly went up to Shiloh for worship, to the place where the sacred tabernacle was located. (1 Samuel 1:3-8, 21) Take note of the depth of feeling with which Hannah prayed. (1 Samuel 1:9-13) Observe how both of them felt about the importance of fulfilling any promise made to God. (1 Samuel 1:22-28) Their fine example undoubtedly helped Samuel to develop the qualities that enabled him to pursue a right course​—even when people around him who supposedly served Jehovah showed no respect for God’s ways. In time, Jehovah entrusted Samuel with responsibility as His prophet.​—1 Samuel 2:11, 12; 3:1-21.

9. (a) What influences at home had a good effect on Timothy? (b) What sort of person did Timothy become?

⁹ Would you like your son to become like Timothy, who as a young man became an associate of the apostle Paul? Timothy’s father was not a believer, but his mother and his grandmother set a fine example of appreciation for spiritual things. This no doubt helped to lay a good foundation for Timothy’s life as a Christian. We are told that his mother, Eunice, and his grandmother Lois had “faith . . . without any hypocrisy.” Their lives as Christians were not playacting; they really lived in harmony with what they professed to believe, and they taught young Timothy to do the same. Timothy proved that he was dependable and that he genuinely cared about the welfare of others.​—2 Timothy 1:5; Philippians 2:20-22.

10. (a) What examples outside the home may affect our children? (b) How should we react when these influences show up in the speech or attitude of our children?

¹⁰ The examples that affect our children are not all within the home. There are the children with whom they attend school, teachers whose work is to mold young minds, people who feel strongly that everyone should conform to deeply entrenched tribal or community customs, sports stars whose achievements are widely praised, and public officials whose conduct is featured in the news. Millions of children have also been exposed to the brutality of war. Should it surprise us if these influences show up in the speech or attitude of our children? How do we react when they do? Does a sharp rebuke or a stern lecture solve the problem? Instead of giving a quick response to our children, would it not be better to ask ourselves, ‘Is there something in Jehovah’s way of dealing with us that might help in discerning how to handle this situation?’​—Compare Romans 2:4.

11. When parents make mistakes, how may this affect the attitude of their children?

¹¹ Of course, imperfect parents are not always going to deal with situations in the best way. They will make mistakes. When children realize that, will it erode their respect for their parents? It may, especially if the parents try to gloss over their errors by harshly asserting their authority. But the outcome may be very different if the parents are humble and freely admit their mistakes. In this, they can set a valuable example for their children, who need to learn to do the same.​—James 4:6.

What Our Example Can Teach

12, 13. (a) What do children need to learn about love, and how can this be taught most effectively? (b) Why is it important that children learn about love?

¹² There are many valuable lessons that can be taught most effectively when oral instruction is coupled with a good example. Consider a few.

¹³ Expressing unselfish love: One of the most important lessons to be fortified by example is the meaning of love. “We love, because [God] first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) He is the Source and supreme example of love. This principled love, a·gaʹpe, is mentioned in the Bible more than 100 times. It is a quality that identifies true Christians. (John 13:35) Such love is to be shown toward God and Jesus Christ and also by humans toward one another​—even toward humans for whom we may not feel a fondness. (Matthew 5:44, 45; 1 John 5:3) This love must be in our hearts and evident in our lives before we can effectively teach it to our children. Actions speak louder than words. Within the family, children need to see and experience love and related qualities, such as affection. Without these things, the development of a child is stunted physically, mentally, and emotionally. Children also need to see how love and affection are properly manifested toward fellow Christians outside the family.​—Romans 12:10; 1 Peter 3:8.

14. (a) How can children be taught to do good work that brings satisfaction? (b) How can this be done in your family situation?

¹⁴ Learning how to work: Work is a fundamental aspect of life. To have a feeling of self-worth, a person needs to learn how to do good work. (Ecclesiastes 2:24; 2 Thessalonians 3:10) If a child is assigned tasks for which he has had very little instruction and then is scolded for not doing them well, it is unlikely that he will learn to do good work. But when children learn by actually working alongside their parents and are given suitable commendation, they are more likely to learn to do work that brings satisfaction. If the parents’ example is coupled with explanation, the children may learn not only how to get a job done but also how to overcome problems, how to stick to a job until it is finished, and how to reason and make decisions. In this setting they can be helped to appreciate that Jehovah also works, that he does good work, and that Jesus imitates his Father. (Genesis 1:31; Proverbs 8:27-31; John 5:17) If a family does farming or operates a business, some of the family members may work together. Or perhaps the mother can teach her son or daughter to cook and clean up after a meal. A father whose employment is away from the house can plan to work on projects at home with his children. How beneficial it is when the parents have in mind not merely getting immediate jobs done but equipping the children for life!

15. In what ways can lessons in faith be taught? Illustrate.

¹⁵ Maintaining faith in the face of adversity: Faith too is a vital aspect of our lives. When faith is discussed in a family study, the children may learn to define it. They may also become aware of evidence that causes faith to begin to grow in their hearts. But when they see their parents showing unshakable faith in the face of severe trials, the effect may last for a lifetime. A Bible student in Panama was threatened by her husband with expulsion from their house if she did not stop serving Jehovah. Still, with her four little children, she regularly walked 10 miles [16 km] and then rode a bus for another 20 miles [30 km] to get to the nearest Kingdom Hall. Encouraged by that example, some 20 members of her family have embraced the way of the truth.

Setting an Example in Daily Bible Reading

16. Why is daily family Bible reading recommended?

¹⁶ One of the most valuable customs that any family can establish​—a custom that will benefit the parents and be an example for the children to imitate—​is the regular reading of the Bible. If at all possible, do some Bible reading every day. It is not the quantity read that is most important. Far more significant is the regularity and the manner in which it is done. For children, Bible reading might be supplemented by listening to audiocassettes of My Book of Bible Stories if they are available in your language. Reading from God’s Word every day helps us to keep God’s thoughts to the fore. And if such Bible reading is done not only by individuals but by families, this can help entire households to walk in Jehovah’s ways. It is this practice that was encouraged at the recent “God’s Way of Life” Conventions in the drama Families​—Make Daily Bible Reading Your Way of Life!​—Psalm 1:1-3.

17. How do family Bible reading and memorizing of key scriptures help in applying the counsel at Ephesians 6:4?

¹⁷ Bible reading as a family is in harmony with what the apostle Paul wrote in his inspired letter to Christians in Ephesus, namely: “Fathers, do not be irritating your children, but go on bringing them up in the discipline and mental-regulating of Jehovah.” (Ephesians 6:4) What does that mean? “Mental-regulating” literally means “putting mind in”; so Christian fathers are being urged to put the mind of Jehovah God in their children​—to help the children get to know God’s thoughts. Encouraging the children to memorize key scriptures can help to achieve this. The objective is to have Jehovah’s thoughts guide the thinking of the children so that their desires and conduct progressively come to reflect godly standards whether the parents are with the children or not. The Bible is the foundation for such thinking.​—Deuteronomy 6:6, 7.

18. When reading the Bible, what may be needed in order to (a) understand it clearly? (b) benefit from the counsel it contains? (c) respond to what it reveals about Jehovah’s purpose? (d) benefit from what it says about the attitudes and actions of people?

¹⁸ Of course, if the Bible is going to affect our lives, we need to understand what it says. For many, this may require reading portions more than once. To get the full force of certain expressions, we may need to look up words in a dictionary or in Insight on the Scriptures. If the scripture contains counsel or a commandment, take time to talk about situations in our day that make it appropriate. Then you might ask, ‘How can applying this counsel benefit us?’ (Isaiah 48:17, 18) If the scripture is telling about some aspect of Jehovah’s purpose, ask, ‘How are our lives affected by this?’ Perhaps you are reading an account that tells about the attitudes and actions of people. What pressures in life were they experiencing? How did they deal with these? How can we benefit from their example? Always allow time to discuss what the account means in our lives today.​—Romans 15:4; 1 Corinthians 10:11.

19. By being imitators of God, what will we be providing for our children?

¹⁹ What a fine way to get God’s thoughts impressed on our minds and hearts! Thus we will truly be helped to become “imitators of God, as beloved children.” (Ephesians 5:1) And we will provide an example that is truly deserving of imitation by our children.

Do You Remember?

◻ How can parents benefit from Jehovah’s example?

◻ Why must verbal instruction of children be coupled with good parental example?

◻ What are some lessons that are best taught by parental example?

◻ How can we benefit fully from family Bible reading?

Regularly Study God’s Word as a Family

“Man must live, not on bread alone, but on every utterance coming forth through Jehovah’s mouth.”​—MATTHEW 4:4.

1. What does the Bible say about the responsibility of family heads to teach their children Jehovah’s ways?

JEHOVAH GOD gave family heads frequent reminders of their responsibility to teach their children. Such instruction would equip the children for the present life and could also help to prepare them for the life to come. An angel representing God pointed out to Abraham his responsibility to teach his household so that they would “keep Jehovah’s way.” (Genesis 18:19) Israelite parents were told to explain to their children how God had delivered Israel from Egypt and how he had given them his Law at Mount Sinai, in Horeb. (Exodus 13:8, 9; Deuteronomy 4:9, 10; 11:18-21) Christian family heads are admonished to bring up their children “in the discipline and mental-regulating of Jehovah.” (Ephesians 6:4) Even if only one parent serves Jehovah, that one should endeavor to teach the children Jehovah’s ways.​—2 Timothy 1:5; 3:14, 15.

2. Is family study needed if there are no children in the home? Explain.

² This does not mean that family study of God’s Word is only for households where there are children. When a husband and wife have a family study even if there are no children in the home, this shows fine appreciation for spiritual things.​—Ephesians 5:25, 26.

3. Why is regularity of the family study important?

³ To accomplish the most good, instruction needs to be given regularly, in harmony with the lesson that Jehovah taught Israel in the wilderness: “Not by bread alone does man live but by every expression of Jehovah’s mouth does man live.” (Deuteronomy 8:3) Depending on the circumstances of the family, some households may arrange for a weekly study; others may have shorter study sessions on a daily basis. Whatever arrangement you choose, do not leave the study to chance. ‘Buy out the time’ for it. Paying the needed price for such time is a sound investment. The lives of the members of your family are at stake.​—Ephesians 5:15-17; Philippians 3:16.

Objectives to Keep in Mind

4, 5. (a) Through Moses, what did Jehovah set before parents as an important objective in teaching their children? (b) What does that involve today?

⁴ When you conduct the family study, it will accomplish the greatest good if you have in mind clearly defined objectives. Consider a few possibilities.

⁵ At each study, seek to build up love for Jehovah God. While Israel was assembled on the plains of Moab, before they entered the Promised Land, Moses focused their attention on what Jesus Christ would later identify as “the greatest commandment in the Law.” What was it? “You must love Jehovah your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your vital force.” (Matthew 22:36, 37; Deuteronomy 6:5) Moses urged the Israelites to impress this on their own hearts and to teach it to their children. That would require repetition, drawing attention to reasons for loving Jehovah, dealing with attitudes and conduct that could hinder the expression of such love, and demonstrating love for Jehovah in their own lives. Do our children need the same sort of instruction? Yes! And they too need help to ‘circumcise their heart,’ that is, to remove anything that would impede their love for God. (Deuteronomy 10:12, 16; Jeremiah 4:4) Among such impediments may be a desire for things of the world and for opportunities to get immersed in its activities. (1 John 2:15, 16) Love for Jehovah must be active, expressive, moving us to do the things pleasing to our heavenly Father. (1 John 5:3) For your family study to have long-term benefits, every session should be conducted in a manner that strengthens this love.

6. (a) What is required in order to impart accurate knowledge? (b) How do the Scriptures emphasize the importance of accurate knowledge?

⁶ Impart accurate knowledge of God’s requirements. What does that involve? It involves more than being able to read an answer out of a magazine or a book. It usually requires discussion to make sure that key words and principal ideas are clearly understood. Accurate knowledge is a vital factor in putting on the new personality, in keeping in focus the really important things when dealing with problems in life, and, thus, in doing what truly pleases God.​—Philippians 1:9-11; Colossians 1:9, 10; 3:10.

7. (a) Use of what questions may help the family to make practical application of study material? (b) How do the Scriptures emphasize the value of such an objective?

⁷ Help to make practical application of what is learned. With this objective in view, during each family study, ask: ‘How should this material affect our lives? Does it require any change from what we are doing at present? Why should we want to make adjustments?’ (Proverbs 2:10-15; 9:10; Isaiah 48:17, 18) Giving sufficient attention to the practical application of things learned can be an important factor in the spiritual growth of family members.

Use Teaching Tools Wisely

8. What tools for Bible study has the slave class provided?

⁸ “The faithful and discreet slave” has provided an abundance of tools that can be used for study. The Watchtower magazine, for use with the Bible, is available in 131 languages. There are books for Bible study in 153 languages, brochures in 284, audiocassettes in 61, videocassettes in 41, even a computer program for Bible research in 9 languages!​—Matthew 24:45-47.

9. How might we apply the counsel in the scriptures cited in this paragraph when having a family Watchtower study?

⁹ Many households use the family study period to prepare for the congregation Watchtower Study. How helpful that can be! The Watchtower contains the principal spiritual food that is provided to build up Jehovah’s people worldwide. When you study The Watchtower as a family, do more than read paragraphs and answer printed questions. Earnestly seek understanding. Take time to look up scriptures that are cited but not quoted. Invite family members to comment on how these are related to what is stated in the paragraph under consideration. Get the heart involved.​—Proverbs 4:7, 23; Acts 17:11.

10. What can be done to involve the children in the study and to make it an enjoyable time for them?

¹⁰ If there are children in your household, what can you do to make your study not merely a family ritual but an upbuilding, interesting, and happy time? Endeavor to keep each one involved in an appropriate way so that the attention stays focused on the study material. Where possible, arrange for each child to have his own Bible and study magazine. In imitation of the warmth displayed by Jesus, a parent may have a young child sit very close, perhaps putting an arm around the little one. (Compare Mark 10:13-16.) A family head may have a youngster explain a picture that appears with the study material. A young child might be assigned in advance to read a certain scripture. An older one might be assigned to point out opportunities for practical application of the study material.

11. What other teaching tools have been provided, and where these are available, how might they be beneficially used in connection with the family study?

¹¹ Though you may be using The Watchtower as a basis for your discussion, do not forget the other study tools that are available in many languages. If background information or explanation of a Bible expression is needed, Insight on the Scriptures may provide it. Other questions may be answered by consulting the Watch Tower Publications Index or by using the computer research program provided by the Society. Learning to use these tools, if they are available in your language, can be a valuable part of family study. With a view to stimulating the interest of young ones, you may also set aside part of your study time to watch a portion of one of the Society’s instructive videos or to listen to a section of a drama on audiocassette and then discuss it. Good use of these study tools can help to make your family study interesting and beneficial to the entire family.

Adapt to Your Family’s Needs

12. How can the family study play a role in dealing with pressing family needs?

¹² It may be that your family usually studies the Watchtower lesson for the week. But keep your finger on the pulse of the family. If the mother does not have secular work, she may be able to spend time with the children every day when they come home from school. Some situations can be handled then; others may need further attention. When there are pressing family needs, do not ignore them. (Proverbs 27:12) These may involve not only problems at school but also other situations. Select appropriate material, and notify the family in advance about what will be studied.

13. Why might family discussion of how to cope with poverty be beneficial?

¹³ As an example, a large part of the earth is in the grip of poverty; so in many places, it may be necessary to discuss how to cope with it. Would a family study built around real-life situations and Bible principles be advantageous to your household?​—Proverbs 21:5; Ecclesiastes 9:11; Hebrews 13:5, 6, 18.

14. What situations might make family discussion of Jehovah’s view of violence, war, and Christian neutrality timely?

¹⁴ Another subject requiring discussion is violence. All of us need to have Jehovah’s view firmly impressed on our minds and hearts. (Genesis 6:13; Psalm 11:5) Family study of this subject can provide a forum for discussing how to deal with bullies at school, whether to train in martial arts, and how to select suitable entertainment. Violent conflicts have become common; nearly every country is plagued either with civil war, with political or ethnic strife, or with gang wars. As a result, your family may need a discussion about maintaining Christian conduct while surrounded by warring factions.​—Isaiah 2:2-4; John 17:16.

15. How should instruction about sex and marriage be given to children?

¹⁵ As children grow, they need instruction about sex and marriage, suitable to their age. In some cultures most parents never discuss sex with their children. Uninformed children may get twisted views from other youths, and the results can be disastrous. Would it not be better to imitate Jehovah, who gives straightforward but tasteful counsel on this matter in the Bible? Godly counsel will help our children to maintain self-respect and to treat those of the opposite sex with dignity. (Proverbs 5:18-20; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8) Even if you have already discussed these matters, do not hesitate to do it again. As new situations arise, repetition is vital.

16. (a) In various households, when is family study done? (b) How have you dealt with obstacles in order to have a regular family study?

¹⁶ When can family study be done? In imitation of Bethel families around the earth, many households schedule their family study on Monday evening. For others it is different. In Argentina a family of 11, including 9 children, regularly got up at five o’clock every morning to have their family study. Because of varied work schedules, no other time was possible. It was not easy, but it impressed on the minds and hearts of the children the importance of family study. In the Philippines an elder had a regular family study with his wife and their three children as they were growing up. During the week the parents also had personal studies with each of the children so that each one would make the truth his own. In the United States, a sister whose husband is not a Witness walks with her children to the school bus each morning. While waiting for the bus, they spend about ten minutes together reading and discussing appropriate Scriptural study material, and then the mother offers a short prayer before the children board the bus. In the Democratic Republic of Congo, a woman whose unbelieving husband deserted the family has to work hard at study because of her limited education. Her grown son helps by visiting the family each week to take the lead in a study involving his mother and his younger brothers. The mother sets a fine example by her diligent preparation. Is there some situation that makes regular family study difficult in your household? Do not give up. Earnestly seek Jehovah’s blessing on your efforts to have a regular Bible study.​—Mark 11:23, 24.

Rewards From Perseverance

17. (a) In order to have a regular family study, what is required? (b) What experience illustrates the value of regular family instruction in Jehovah’s ways?

¹⁷ Planning is needed. Perseverance is required. But the benefits that come from regular family study are well worth it. (Proverbs 22:6; 3 John 4) Franz and Hilda, in Germany, raised a family of 11 children. Years later, their daughter Magdalena said: “What I consider of most importance today is that there was not a single day that passed without our receiving some spiritual instruction.” When the spirit of nationalism became intense under Adolf Hitler, Magdalena’s father used the Bible to prepare his family for the tests that he realized were coming. In time, the younger family members were seized and taken to a reform school; others of the family were arrested and held in prisons and concentration camps. Some were executed. The faith of all of them held firm​—not only during that time of fierce persecution but also, for the survivors, during the years that followed.

18. How have the efforts of single parents been rewarded?

¹⁸ Many single parents, as well as those whose mates do not share their faith, have likewise provided their children with regular Bible instruction. A single mother, a widow, in India worked hard to instill love for Jehovah in her two children. Her heart was broken, however, when her son stopped associating with Jehovah’s people. She begged Jehovah to forgive her for any shortcomings in her training of her son. But the son had not really forgotten what he had learned. After more than a decade, he returned, made fine spiritual progress, and became a congregation elder. Now he and his wife serve as full-time pioneer ministers. How grateful are those parents who have taken to heart the counsel from Jehovah and his organization to provide regular Bible instruction within the family circle! Are you applying that counsel in your household?

Can You Explain?

◻ Why is regular family study important?

◻ What should our objectives be during each family study?

◻ What tools for teaching have been made available to us?

◻ How can the study be adapted to family needs?

[Picture on page 15]

Definite objectives will enhance your family study

Families, Praise God as Part of His Congregation

“Among the congregated throngs I shall bless Jehovah.”​—PSALM 26:12.

1. What is an important part of true worship in addition to study and prayer at home?

WORSHIP of Jehovah includes not only prayer and study of the Bible at home but also activity as part of the congregation of God. Ancient Israel was commanded to “congregate the people, the men and the women and the little ones,” to learn the law of God so as to walk in his way. (Deuteronomy 31:12; Joshua 8:35) Both older ones and ‘young men and virgins’ were encouraged to share in praising the name of Jehovah. (Psalm 148:12, 13) Similar arrangements apply within the Christian congregation. In Kingdom Halls throughout the earth, men, women, and children participate freely in sessions that involve the audience, and many find great pleasure in having a share.​—Hebrews 10:23-25.

2. (a) Why is preparation a key factor in helping young ones to enjoy the meetings? (b) Whose example is important?

² True, helping young ones to get into a wholesome routine of congregation activity can be a challenge. If some children who attend with their parents apparently do not enjoy the meetings, what may be the problem? Of course, most children have a short attention span and are easily bored. Preparation can help to handle this problem. Without preparation, children cannot share in the meetings in a meaningful way. (Proverbs 15:23) Without preparation, it will be difficult for them to make spiritual advancement that brings satisfaction. (1 Timothy 4:12, 15) What can be done? First, parents need to ask whether they themselves prepare for the meetings. Their example is a powerful influence. (Luke 6:40) Careful planning of the family study can also be an important factor.

Building Up the Heart

3. During the family study, why should special effort be made to build up hearts, and what does this require?

³ The family study should be a time not merely to fill heads with knowledge but also to build up hearts. This requires both an awareness of the problems that confront family members and a loving concern for each one. Jehovah is “an examiner of the heart.”​—1 Chronicles 29:17.

4. (a) What does it mean to be “in want of heart”? (b) What is involved in “acquiring heart”?

⁴ What does Jehovah find when he examines the hearts of our children? Most of them would say that they love God, and that is commendable. Yet, one who is young or who is newly learning about Jehovah has limited experience in Jehovah’s ways. Because he is inexperienced, he may be “in want of heart,” as the Bible expresses it. Perhaps not all his motives are bad, but it takes time to bring one’s heart into a condition that will really please God. This involves bringing one’s thoughts, desires, affections, emotions, and goals in life into harmony with what God approves, to the extent that this is possible for imperfect humans. When someone does such molding of the inner person in a godly way, he is “acquiring heart.”​—Proverbs 9:4; 19:8.

5, 6. How can parents help their children to ‘acquire heart’?

⁵ Can parents help their children to ‘acquire heart’? True, no human can put a good condition of heart into another person. Each one of us is endowed with free will, and much depends on what we allow ourselves to think about. With discernment, however, parents can often draw their child out, learning what is in the heart and where help is needed. Use such questions as ‘How do you feel about this?’ and ‘What would you really like to do?’ Then, listen patiently. Do not overreact. (Proverbs 20:5) An atmosphere of kindness, understanding, and love is important if you want to reach the heart.

⁶ To fortify wholesome inclinations, frequently discuss the fruitage of the spirit​—each aspect of it—​and work together as a family to cultivate it. (Galatians 5:22, 23) Build up love for Jehovah and for Jesus Christ, not merely by saying that we should love them but by discussing the reasons why we love them and how we can express that love. (2 Corinthians 5:14, 15) Strengthen the desire to do what is right by reasoning on the benefits that will result. Build up the desire to shun wrong thoughts, speech, and conduct by discussing the bad effects of such things. (Amos 5:15; 3 John 11) Show how thoughts, speech, and conduct​—whether good or bad—​can affect one’s relationship with Jehovah.

7. What can be done to help children to deal with problems and to make decisions in a way that will keep them close to Jehovah?

⁷ When a child has a problem or needs to make an important decision, we could ask him: ‘How do you think Jehovah views this? What do you know about Jehovah that makes you say that? Have you prayed to him about it?’ Starting as early as possible, help your children to build a pattern of life in which an earnest effort is always made to ascertain God’s will and then to do it. As they come to have a close, personal relationship with Jehovah, they will find pleasure in walking in his paths. (Psalm 119:34, 35) This will build within them appreciation for the privilege of being associated with the congregation of the true God.

Preparation for Congregation Meetings

8. (a) What may help us to include in our family study all the things that need attention? (b) How important is this study?

⁸ There are many matters that need attention during periods of family study. How can you fit them all in? It is impossible to do everything at the same time. But you may find it helpful to make a checklist. (Proverbs 21:5) From time to time, review it and consider what needs special attention. Take a keen interest in the progress of each family member. This arrangement for family study is an important part of Christian education, equipping us for life now and preparing us for the eternal life to come.​—1 Timothy 4:8.

9. What goals regarding meeting preparation might we gradually work on during our family studies?

⁹ Does your family study include preparation for congregation meetings? There are a number of projects that you might progressively work on as you study together. Some of these may require weeks, months, or even years to accomplish. Consider these goals: (1) each one in the family ready to comment at the congregation meetings; (2) each one working on giving comments in his own words; (3) including scriptures in comments; and (4) analyzing the material with a view to personal application. All of this can help an individual to make the truth his own.​—Psalm 25:4, 5.

10. (a) How might we give attention to each of our congregation meetings? (b) Why is this worthwhile?

¹⁰ Even if your family study is usually based on the Watchtower lesson for the week, do not overlook the importance of individual or family preparation for the Congregation Book Study, the Theocratic Ministry School, and the Service Meeting. These too are important parts of the program for teaching us to walk in Jehovah’s way. You may periodically be able to prepare for the meetings as a family group. By your working together, study skills will be improved. As a result, more good will be derived from the meetings themselves. Among other things, discuss the benefits of regular preparation for these meetings and the importance of having a definite time set aside for it.​—Ephesians 5:15-17.

11, 12. How would preparation for congregation singing benefit us, and how might this be done?

¹¹ At the “God’s Way of Life” Conventions, we were encouraged to prepare for another feature of our meetings​—the singing. Have you followed through on that? Doing so can help to etch Bible truths on our minds and hearts and at the same time enhance our enjoyment of congregation meetings.

¹² Preparation that includes reading and discussing the meaning of the words in some of the scheduled songs can help us to sing from the heart. In ancient Israel, musical instruments were prominently used in worship. (1 Chronicles 25:1; Psalm 28:7) Does someone in your family play a musical instrument? Why not use that instrument to practice one of the Kingdom songs for the week, and then sing the song as a family. Another possibility is to use a recording of the songs. In some lands our brothers sing beautifully without musical accompaniment. As they walk on the roads or go about their work in the fields, they often enjoy singing the songs that are scheduled for the congregation meetings that week.​—Ephesians 5:19.

Family Preparation for Field Service

13, 14. Why are family discussions that prepare our hearts for the field ministry valuable?

¹³ Witnessing to others about Jehovah and his purpose is an important part of our lives. (Isaiah 43:10-12; Matthew 24:14) Whether young or old, we enjoy this activity more and we accomplish greater good if we are prepared. How can we do this within the family?

¹⁴ As with all matters that involve our worship, it is important to prepare our hearts. We need to discuss not only what we are going to do but also why we are going to do it. In the days of King Jehoshaphat, the people were given instruction in divine law, but the Bible tells us that they “had not yet prepared their heart.” This left them vulnerable to enticements that could take them away from true worship. (2 Chronicles 20:33; 21:11) Our goal is not simply to be able to report hours spent in the field service, nor is it merely to place literature. Our ministry should be an expression of our love for Jehovah and of our love for people who need the opportunity to choose life. (Hebrews 13:15) It is activity in which we are “God’s fellow workers.” (1 Corinthians 3:9) What a privilege! As we share in the ministry, we do so in cooperation with the holy angels. (Revelation 14:6, 7) What better time could there be to build up appreciation for this than in family discussions, whether at our weekly study or when discussing an appropriate text from Examining the Scriptures Daily!

15. When might we prepare for field service as a family?

¹⁵ Do you occasionally use time at your family study to assist the members of your household to prepare for the week’s field service? Doing so can be very beneficial. (2 Timothy 2:15) It can help to make their service meaningful and productive. Occasionally, you might set aside an entire study session for such preparation. More often, you might deal with aspects of the field ministry in shorter discussions at the end of the family study or at some other time during the week.

16. Discuss the value of each of the steps listed in the paragraph.

¹⁶ Family sessions might focus on a series of steps, such as the following: (1) Prepare a well-rehearsed presentation including a scripture to read from the Bible if opportunity permits. (2) Make sure that each one has, if possible, his own field service bag, a Bible, a notebook, a pen or pencil, tracts, and other literature in good condition. The service bag does not have to be expensive, but it should be neat. (3) Discuss where and how to do informal witnessing. Follow up each stage of this instruction with periods during which you work together in the field service. Offer helpful suggestions, but do not counsel on too many points.

17, 18. (a) What sort of preparation as a family can help to make our field ministry more fruitful? (b) What aspect of this preparation could be done each week?

¹⁷ A major part of the work that Jesus Christ assigned to his followers is disciple making. (Matthew 28:19, 20) Making disciples involves more than preaching. It requires teaching. How can your family study help you to be effective in doing this?

¹⁸ As a family, discuss whom it would be good to make return visits on. Some of them may have accepted literature; some may simply have listened. They may have been met in the house-to-house work or in informal witnessing at the market or at school. Let God’s Word guide you. (Psalm 25:9; Ezekiel 9:4) Decide whom each one of you wants to call on that week. What will be talked about? Family discussion can help each member to prepare. Make note of specific scriptures to share with interested ones as well as appropriate points from the brochure What Does God Require of Us? or the book Knowledge That Leads to Everlasting Life. Do not try to cover too much on one call. Leave the householder with a question that will be answered on the next visit. Why not make it part of the weekly family routine to plan which return visits each one is going to make, when he will make them, and what he hopes to accomplish. Doing this can help to make the field ministry of the entire family more fruitful.

Go On Teaching Them Jehovah’s Way

19. If family members are to continue walking in Jehovah’s way, what must they experience, and what contributes to this?

¹⁹ Being a family head in this wicked world is a challenge. Satan and his demons endeavor to destroy the spirituality of Jehovah’s servants. (1 Peter 5:8) Moreover, today there is a lot of pressure on you parents, especially on you single parents. It is difficult to find the time to do all the things you would like to do. But it is worth the effort, even if you can apply just one suggestion at a time, and gradually improve your family study program. Seeing those who are very close to you walk loyally in Jehovah’s way is a heartwarming reward. To walk successfully in Jehovah’s way, family members need to find joy in being at congregation meetings and in sharing in the field ministry. For that to be true, preparation is required​—preparation that builds up the heart and that equips each one to have a meaningful share.

20. What can help more parents to experience the sort of joy that is expressed at 3 John 4?

²⁰ Concerning those whom he had helped spiritually, the apostle John wrote: “No greater cause for thankfulness do I have than these things, that I should be hearing that my children go on walking in the truth.” (3 John 4) Family studies that are conducted with clear objectives in mind and family heads who deal in a kind, helpful manner with the individual needs of family members can do much to enable the family to share such joy. By cultivating appreciation for God’s way of life, parents are helping their family to enjoy the very best way of life.​—Psalm 19:7-11.

Can You Explain?

◻ Why is meeting preparation so important for our children?

◻ How can parents help their children to ‘acquire heart’?

◻ How can our family study help in preparing for all the meetings?

◻ How might preparing for field service as a family help us to be more effective?