IMIBUZO EBUZWA NGABASAKHULAYO
Ngingaxoxisana Njani Labazali Bami Ngemithetho Abangifakela Yona?
“Ngileminyaka engu-15 ngangivumelana layo yonke imithetho abazali bami ababenginika yona, kodwa khathesi sengileminyaka engu-19 futhi sengifisa ukuba lenkululeko enengi.”—USylvia.
Lawe uzizwa njengoSylvia yini? Nxa kunjalo isihloko lesi sizakunceda ukuthi uxoxisane kuhle labazali bakho.
Okumele ukwazi
Cabangisisa ngokulandelayo ungakaxoxi labazali bakho:
Imithetho inceda ukuthi kube lokuhleleka. Ake ucabange umgwaqo ohamba izimota ezinengi. Ubona angani bekungaba njani emgwaqweni onjalo aluba bekungela masayini omgwaqo, kungela marobhothi futhi kungela mithetho eqondisa isiqubu sezimota? Njengemithetho yemigwaqo, imithetho ebekwa ngabazali bakho layo yenza kube lokuhleleka endlini.
Imithetho efakwa ngabazali bakho itshengisa ukuthi balendaba lawe. Nxa bengasakufakelanga imithetho lokho kungatshengisa ukuthi abalandaba lokuthi kwenzakalani empilweni yakho. Lokhu kungatshengisa ukuthi abakuthandi.
UBUKWAZI YINI? Abazali labo balayo imithetho okumele bayilalele. Nxa ungakukholwa lokho ungabala iMibhalo elandelayo: UGenesisi 2:24; uDutheronomi 6:6, 7; u-Efesu 6:4 lo-1 Thimothi 5:8.
Ungenzani nxa ubona angani imithetho yabazali bakho iyakucindezela?
Ongakwenza
Cabanga ngokulandelayo ungakaxoxi labazali bakho. Uyayilalela yini imithetho abazali bakho abakufakela yona? Nxa kuyikuthi awuyilaleli, lesi akungeke kube yisikhathi esihle sokubacela ukuthi bakuphe inkululeko enengi. Ongakwenza yikubala isihloko esithi, “Ngingenzani Ukuze Abazali Bami Bangithembe?”
Nxa kuyikuthi uyayilalela imithetho yabazali bakho lungiselela lokho ongafisa ukukutsho nxa usukhuluma labo. Ukucabangisisa ngalokho ongafisa ukukutsho kungakunceda ubone ukuthi lokho ofuna ukukucela ebazalini bakho kulengqondo yini. Nxa usukwenzile lokho cela abazali bakho ukuthi bahlele isikhathi lendawo lapho elizakhulumela khona likhululekile. Nxa sesifikile isikhathi sokuthi likhulume kumele ukhumbule okulandelayo:
Bahloniphe. IBhayibhili lithi: “Ilizwi elilukhuni livusa ulaka.” (IZaga 15:1) Hlala ukhumbula ukuthi ingxoxo yenu ayisoze ihambe kuhle nxa ungaphikisana labazali bakho kumbe ungabatshela ukuthi imithetho yabo iyakucindezela.
“Ukuhlonipha abazali bami kwenza labo bangihloniphe. Izikhathi ezinengi kubalula ukuthi sivumelane nxa sonke sihloniphana.”—UBianca oleminyaka engu-19.
Lalela. IBhayibhili lithi ‘kumele siphangise ukulalela, siphuze ukukhuluma.’ (UJakhobe 1:19) Khumbula ukuthi akumelanga kube nguwe kuphela okhulumayo kodwa kumele ulalele lalokho abazali bakho abakutshoyo.
“Nxa sikhula singabona angani sazi ngcono kulabazali bethu, kodwa lokhu akusilo qiniso. Kuhle ukuthi silalele iseluleko sabo lalokho abasicebisa ngakho.”—UDevan.
Zwisisa. Zama ukuzwisisa indlela abazali bakho abazizwa ngayo. Lalela iseluleko seBhayibhili esithi “lingaqakathekisi lokho okufunwa yini kuphela kodwa liqakathekise lalokho okufunwa ngabanye.” Yikho kuqakathekise lokho okufunwa ngabazali bakho.—KwabaseFiliphi 2:4.
Ubona angani yikuphi okungenza uphiwe inkululeko ethe xaxa?
“Ngangihlala ngicabanga ukuthi abazali bami bangiqophile. Kodwa khathesi senginanzelela ukuthi babezama ukungivikela ngize ngibe ngumuntu omdala. Konke ababekwenza kwakungenxa yokuthi bayangithanda.”—UJoshua oleminyaka engu-21.
Batshele amacebo olawo. Ake sithi abazali bakho bayala ukuthi uye embuthanweni ozabe usendaweni ekhatshana. Zama ukuzwisisa ukuthi okwenza bale yikuthi kukhatshana yini kumbe bakhathazeke ngombuthano wakhona.
Nxa besesaba ukuthi kukhatshana babuze ukuthi bangavuma yini nxa ungahamba lomunye umuntu abamthembayo.
Nxa bekhathazeke ngombuthano wakhona ungabatshela ukuthi ngobani abazabe bekhona lokuthi kuyabe kusenzakalani.
Khumbula ukuthi kumele ukhulume ngenhlonipho njalo ulalelisise nxa abazali bakho bekhuluma. Tshengisa ukuthi ‘uyamhlonipha uyihlo lonyoko’ ngendlela okhuluma ngayo langendlela oziphatha ngayo. (Kwabase-Efesu 6:2, 3) Kungelani lokuthi bazantshintsha isinqumo sabo loba hatshi, kumele wenze okulandelayo:
Sihloniphe isinqumo sabo. Lokhu kuqakatheke kakhulu lanxa abantu abanengi bengakunanzeleli. Nxa abazali bakho bengayala ukuthi wenze oyabe ukucelile ungaphikisani labo ngoba lokho kungenza ukuthi bakuncitshe inkululeko ngesikhathi esizayo. Kodwa ungahlonipha isinqumo sabo kuzabalula ukuthi bakunike inkululeko ethe xaxa.