Isahluko Setjhumi Nantathu
Nengabe Umtjhado Ufuna Ukuphela
1, 2. Nengabe umtjhado uneemraro, ngiwuphi umbuzo okufuze ubuzwe?
NGO-1988 umfazi womTariyana ibizo lakhe elinguLucia gade agandeleleke khulu.a Ngemva kweemnyaka elitjhumi umtjhwadwakhe gade ufuna ukuphela. Eenkhathini ezinengi walinga ukubuyisana nendodakwakhe, kodwana akhenge kulunge. Ngalokho bahlala ngokuhlukana ngebanga lokungafani kwabo begodu kwanje uqalene nokukhulisa amadodakazakhe amabili ayedwa. Akhumbula emva ngesikhatheso, uLucia uthi: “Bengiqiniseka bona ayikho into engasindisa umtjhwadwethu.”
2 Nengabe uneemraro emtjhadweni, uzokwazi ukuzwisisa indlela uLucia azizwa ngayo. Umtjhwadwakho kungenzeka unomraro begodu ungazibuza bona ungakwazi ukusinda na. Nengabe kunjalo ngawe, uzokufumana kusiza ukucabangela umbuzo naku: Ngiyazilandela zoke iinluleko ezihle uZimu azinikele eBhayibhilini zokwenza umtjhado uphumelele?—IRhalani 119:105.
3. Nanyana ukutlhala kwandile, ngiwuphi umbiko okhona ngabantu abatlhalileko neemndenabo?
3 Nengabe kunokungazwisisani okukhulu hlangana kwendoda nomfazi, ukuphuma emtjhadweni kungabonakala kuyinto elula. Kodwana nanyana iinarha ezinengi ziqalene nokwanda kokuhlukana kweemndeni, ukwaziswa kwamva kutjengisa bona inani elikhulu lamadoda nabafazi abatlhalileko liyazisola ngokutlhala. Abanengi baneemraro eemnengi yepilo, kokubili ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo kunalabo abahlala emtjhadwenabo. Ukuhlangahlangana nokungabi nethabo kwabantwana bababelethi abatlhalileko kanengi kuhlala iimnyaka eemnengi. Ababelethi nabangani bomndeni ohlukeneko nabo baqalana nobudisi. Kodwana uZimu, uMthomisi womtjhado, ubuqala njani ubujamobo?
4. Ingararululwa njani iimraro emtjhwadweni?
4 Njengombana kutjengiswe ezahlukweni ezigadungileko, uZimu bekanqophe bona umtjhado kufuze ube sibopho sakho koke ukuphila. (Genesisi 2:24) Manje-ke, kubayini iimtjhado eemnengi kangaka iphela? Lokho akwenzeki ngobusuku obubodwa. Kanengi kuba namatshwayo asiyeleliso. Iimraro emncani emtjhadweni ingakhula kancanikancani bekube kulapho ingasararululeki khona. Kodwana nengabe iimraro le irarululwa khonokho ngesizo leBhayibhili, ukuphela kweemtjhado eemnengi bekungabalekelwa.
YIBA NOMBONO WAMAMBALA NGEZINTO
5. Ngiwuphi umbono wamambala okufuze kuqalanwe nawo kunanyana ngiwuphi umtjhado?
5 Into ngezinye iinkhathi ebangela iimraro kukuba nombono ongasiwo wamambala ngezinto loyo omunye namtjhana bobabili abalingani bomtjhado okungenzeka babe nawo. Iincwadi zethando, abomagazini abathandwako, amahlelo wethelevitjhini namamuvi kungakha amathemba namabhudango ahluke khulu ekuphileni kwamambala. Nengabe amabhudango la awazaliseki, umuntu angazizwa adlelezelwe, anganeliseki begodu asilingekile. Nokho, abantu ababili abangakapheleli bangalifumana njani-ke ithabo emtjhadweni? Kutlhoga iimzamo ukufikelela ubuhlobo obuphumelelako.
6. (a) Ngiwuphi umbono olinganiseleko onikelwa yiBhayibhili ngomtjhado? (b) Ngiwaphi amanye amabanga wokungavumelani emtjhadweni?
6 IBhayibhili ibeka izinto njengombana zinjalo. Ikhuluma ngethabo lomtjhado, kodwana godu iyelelisa ngokobana labo abatjhadako ‘bazokuba nesizi enyamenabo.’ (1 KwebeKorinte 7:28, NW) Njengombana kutjengisiwe, bobabili abalingani abakapheleli begodu banesono. Ingqondo, amazizo nendlela umlingani ngamunye akhuliswe ngayo ayifani. Ngezinye iinkhathi isibili asivumelani ngemali, abantwana nangebemzini. Ukungabi nesikhathi esaneleko sokwenza izinto ndawonye neemraro engokomseme nakho kungaba mthombo wokungazwani.b Kuthatha isikhathi ukukhuluma ngezinto ezinjengalezi, kodwana yiba nesibindi! Abatjhadi abanengi bayakwazi ukuqalana neemraro enjalo ngobunye bafikelele isisombululo esimukelekako.
COCANI NGOKUNGAZWANI KWENU
7, 8. Nengabe kunokuzwisana ubuhlungu namtjhana ukungazwani hlangana nabalingani bomtjhado, ngiyiphi indlela engokoMtlolo yokuqalana nakho?
7 Abanye bakufumana kubudisi ukuhlala banomoya ophasi nebakhuluma ngezinto ezibazwisa ubuhlungu, ukungazwisisani namtjhana iimtjhapho yomuntu mathupha. Kunokobana atjho ngokunqophileko bona: “Ngibona kwanga awungizwisisi,” umlingani angazizwa anesibibithwana begodu afederise umraro. Abanengi bangathi: “Uzicabangela wena kwaphela,” namtjhana, “Awungithandi.” Angafuni ukuzibandakanya epikiswaneni, omunye umlingani angamane avale lapho adla khona.
8 Indlela engcono yokulandelwa kulalela isiluleko seBhayibhili esithi: “Nengabe nifikelwe kuthukuthela, zibambeni ningoni; ilanga lingatjhingi nisathukuthele.” (Kwebe-Efesu 4:26) Esinye isibili esithabileko emtjhadweni, nesiba neemnyaka ema-60 sitjhadile, sabuzwa bona sikghone njani ukwenza umtjhado uphumelele. Indoda yathi: “Sifunde ukungalali singakalungisi ukungazwani kwethu, kungakhathaliseki bona kuncani kangangani.”
9. (a) Khuyini okukhulunywa ngakho eMitlolweni njengengcenye eqakathekileko yokukhulumisana? (b) Kanengi abantu abatjhadileko kufuze benzeni, ngitjho nanyana lokhu kutlhoga ukuthobeka nesibindi?
9 Nengabe indoda nomfazi abavumelani, ngamunye kutlhogeka bona “alalele msinyana nakukhulunywako, kodwana angaphenduli msinyana, aphuze ukuthukuthela.” (KaJakobosi 1:19) Ngemva kokulalelisisa, bobabili abalingani kungenzeka babone bona kufuze babawe ukulitjalelwa. (KaJakobosi 5:16) Ukutjho ngokuthembeka bona, “Ngibawa ungilibalele ngokukuzwisa ubuhlungu,” kutlhoga ukuthobeka nesibindi. Kodwana ukwenza izinto ngendlela le kungaphumelela khulu ekusizeni abantu abatjhadileko ingasi ukurarulula iimrarwabo kwaphela, kodwana godu nokuthandana nokutjhidelana okuzobenza bathabele ukuba ndawonye.
UKUNIKELA IFANELO YEMTJHADWENI
10. Ngisiphi isivikelo esakhuthazwa nguPowula emaKrestwini weKorinte esingasebenza kumKrestu namhlanje?
10 Umpostoli uPowula natlolela beKorinte, wakhuthaza ukutjhada “ngebanga lokwanda kobufebe.” (1 KwebeKorinte 7:2, NW) Iphasi namhlanje limbi, mhlamunye ngitjho nangaphezu kweKorinte yekadeni. Iindaba zokuziphatha okumbi iphasi elicoca ngazo tjhatjhalazi, indlela yokumbatha kwalo okunganasithunzi neendaba ezithandwako ezivezwa kibomagazini, eencwadini, e-TV, nakumamuvi koke kwenzelwe ukuvusa iinkanuko zomseme ezingekho emthethweni. KwebeKorinte abaphila ngaphasi kobujamo obufanako, umpostoli uPowula wathi: “Kungcono batjhade kunobanyana batjhiswe yikanuko.”—1 KwebeKorinte 7:9.
11, 12. (a) Indoda nomfazi bakolodana ini, begodu lokhu kufuze kwenziwe ngawuphi umoya? (b) Ubujamo bungasingathwa njani nengabe abatjhadi kufuze badimane ifanelo yomtjhado isikhatjhana?
11 Ngalokho iBhayibhili ikhuthaza amaKrestu atjhadileko ithi: “Indoda ayimkholise umkayo, nomfazi enze njalo” endodenakhe. (1 KwebeKorinte 7:3) Tjheja bona kugandelelwa ukupha—ingasi ukufuna ngekani. Ukutjhidelana okungokomzimba emtjhadweni kwanelisa kwamambala kwaphela nengabe umlingani ngamunye ucabangela ihlalakuhle yomunye. Isibonelo, iBhayibhili ikhuthaza amadoda bona ‘aphilisane kuhle’ nabafazi bawo. (1 KaPitrosi 3:7) Lokhu kuliqiniso khulu endabeni yokupha nokwamukela ifanelo yemtjhadweni. Nengabe umfazi akaphathwa ngesineke, angakufumana kubudisi ukuthabela ukutjhidelanokhu emtjhadweni.
12 Kuneenkhathi lapho abalingani bomtjhado bangadimana khona ifanelo yomtjhado le. Lokhu kungenzeka emfazini ngeenkhathi ezithileko zenyanga namtjhana nekadinwe khulu. (Madanisa noLefitikosi 18:19.) Kungenzeka into efanako nangendoda nengabe iqalene nomraro omkhulu emsebenzini begodu izizwa iphelelwe mamandla. Ubujamo obunjalo bokudimana ifanelo yomtjhado isikhatjhana bungasingathwa kuhle nengabe bobabili abalingani bakhuluma ngokutjhaphulukileko ngobujamo begodu benza njalo “ngokuvumelana.” (1 KwebeKorinte 7:5) Lokhu kungavimbela bobabili abalingani ekugijimeleni esiphethweni esingasiso. Nokho, nengabe ngokuzithandela umfazi udima indodakwakhe namtjhana nengabe indoda ngamabomu ibhalelwa kunikela ifanelo yomtjhado ngendlela yethando, umlingani angalingeka. Ebujamweni obunjalo, kungavela iimraro emtjhadweni.
13. Khuyini amaKrestu angayenza bona abulunge ukucabanga kwawo kuhlanzekile?
13 Njengawo woke amaKrestu, iinceku zakaZimu ezitjhadileko kufuze zibalekele iinthombe zomseme ezisilapheleko, ezingakha iimfiso ezisilapheleko nezingasi ngokwemvelo. (KwebeKholose 3:5) Godu kufuze zitjheje iimcabango nezenzo zazo nezisebenzelana nawo woke amalunga wobulili obuhlukileko. UJesu wayelelisa wathi: “Nanyana ngubani oqala umfazi amkhanuke bona ibe ngewakhe, uhlobongile naye ehliziyweni yakhe.” (Matewu 5:28) Ngokusebenzisa isiluleko seBhayibhili malungana nobuhlobo bomseme, abalingani bomtjhado kufuze babalekele ukuwela esilingweni bese bayaphinga. Bangaragela phambili bathabela ukutjhidelana okuthabisako emtjhadweni lapho ubuhlobo bomseme buqalwa njengesipho esihle esivela kuMthomisi womtjhado, uJehova.—Iziyema 5:15-19.
AMABANGA WEBHAYIBHILI WOKUTLHALA
14. Ngibuphi ubujamo obudanisako obuvelako ngezinye iinkhathi? Begodu kubayini?
14 Ngokuthabisako, eemtjhadweni yamaKrestu eemnengi, nanyana ngiwuphi umraro ovelako ungararululwa. Nokho, ngezinye iinkhathi akubi njalo. Ngombana abantu abakapheleli begodu siphila ephasini elinesono elingaphasi kokulawulwa nguSathana, eminye iimtjhado iyaphela. (1 KaJwanisi 5:19) AmaKrestu angaqalana njani nobujamo obulinga kangaka?
15. (a) Ngiliphi okukuphela kwebanga lokutlhala elingokoMtlolo elivumela umuntu bona atjhade godu? (b) Kubayini abanye bakhetha ukungamtlhali umlingani ongakathembeki?
15 Njengombana kutjhiwo eSahlukweni sesibili sencwadi le, ubufebe kuphela kwebanga elingokoMtlolo lokutlhala ukwazi ukutjhada godu.c (Matewu 19:9) Nengabe unebanga eliphathekako lokobana umlinganakho akakathembeki, uqalene nesiqunto esibudisi. Uzokuragela phambili uhlala naye namtjhana uzokutlhala? Akunamthetho ebekiweko. Amanye amaKrestu amcolela kwamambala umlingani ophendukileko, begodu umtjhado obulungiweko uragela phambili ngethabo. Abanye bakhetha ukungatlhali ngebanga labantwana.
16. (a) Ngiwaphi amanye amabanga enza abanye bona batlhale umlinganabo owenze umtjhapho? (b) Umlingani othembekileko nekenza isiqunto sokutlhala namtjhana sokungatlhali, kubayini kungakafuzi bona kube nomuntu onyelisa isiqunto sakhe?
16 Ngakelinye ihlangothi, isono singaphumela ekuzithwaleni namtjhana emalwelweni athathelwana ngomseme. Namtjhana abantwana kungatlhogeka bona bavikelwe embelethini obatlhorisako ngokomseme. Ngokukhanyako, kunokunengi okufuze kucatjangelwe ngaphambi kokwenza isiqunto. Nokho, nengabe uzwile ngokungathembeki komlinganakho begodu ngemva kwalokho uba nobuhlobo bomseme naye godu, lokho kutjengisa bona umlibalele umlinganakho begodu uzimisele ukuragela phambili nomtjhado. Amabanga wokutlhala angokoMtlolo bese uyatjhada godu awasasebenzi. Akekho okufuze abe ngundabeni begodu alinge ukukukhethela, namtjhana bona kube nomuntu onyelisa isiqunto osenzileko. Kufuze uphile neemphumela yesiqunto sakho. “Omunye nomunye kufanele bona athwale umthwalo wakhe.”—KwebeGalatiya 6:5.
AMABANGA WOKUHLALA NGOKUHLUKANA
17. Nengabe akukenziwa ubufebe, ngiyiphi iimbandela yokuhlala ngokuhlukana namtjhana yokutlhala ebekwa Mitlolo?
17 Bukhona na ubujamo obuvumela ukuhlala ngokuhlukana namtjhana ukutlhala umlinganakho ngitjho nanyana angazange afebe? Iye, kodwana ebujamweni obunjalo umKrestu akakatjhaphuluki bona abe nomunye umlingani ngombono wokutjhada godu. (Matewu 5:32) IBhayibhili nanyana ikucabangela ukuhlukana okunjalo, ikubeka ngokukhanyako bona loyo ohlukana nomlinganakhe ‘ahlale anganamuntu namtjhana abuyisane’ nomlinganakhe. (1 KwebeKorinte 7:11) Ngibuphi obunye ubujamo obudluleleko obungenza kube kuhlakanipha ukuhlala ngokuhlukana?
18, 19. Ngibuphi obunye ubujamo obudluleleko obungadosela umlingani bona acabangele ukuhlakanipha kokuhlala ngokuhlukana namtjhana ukutlhala, ngitjho namtjhana angekhe akwazi ukutjhada godu?
18 Nokho, umndeni ungatlhaga ngebanga lokudonda khulu nemikghwa yendoda emimbi.d Ingabheja ngemali yomndeni namtjhana iyisebenzisele iindakamizwa notjwala. IBhayibhili ithi: “Kodwana nengabe umuntu angabatjheji . . . bomndeni wakhe, umuntu loyo selatjengise ngokupheleleko bona akakholwa, mumbi khulu udlula ongakholwako.” (1 KuThimothi 5:8) Nengabe indoda ayifuni ukutjhentjha iindlela zayo, mhlamunye isekele nemikghwayo ngokuthatha imali erholwa mkayo, umfazi angakhetha ukuzivikela nokuvikela abantwabakhe ngokufumana isihlukaniso esingokomthetho.
19 Isenzo esingokomthethweso godu singacatjangelwa nengabe umlingani unenturhu khulu emlinganinakhe, mhlamunye ambetha kangangobana ipilwakhe ngitjho nokuphila ngokwakho kusengozini. Ngaphezu kwalokho, nengabe umlingani unande alinga ukukatelela umlinganakhe ukuphula umthetho kaZimu ngendlela ethileko, umlingani othuselwako angacabangela ukuhlala ngokuhlukana khulukhulu nengabe isenzwesi sifikelela ebujamweni bokobana ipilwakhe engokomoya isengozini. Umlingani osengozini angaphetha ngokobana okukuphela kwendlela ‘yokuhlonipha uZimu kunabantu’ kufumana isihlukaniso esingokomthetho.—IZenzo 5:29.
20. (a) Endabeni yokuhlukana komndeni, abangani abavuthiweko nabadala bangasiza njani, kodwana khuyini okungakafuzi bayenze? (b) Abantu abatjhadileko akukafuzi basebenzise iBhayibhili ngokuhlala ngokuhlukana nokutlhala njengebanga lokwenzani?
20 Kiwo woke amabanga wokutlhoriswa komlingani okudluleleko, akekho okufuze agandelele umlingani othembekileko bona ahlale ngokuhlukana namtjhana ahlale nomlinganakhe. Nanyana abangani abavuthiweko nabadala bangasekela banikele nesiluleko esisekelwe eBhayibhilini, angekhe bakwazi koke okwenzeka hlangana kwendoda nomfazi. NguJehova kwaphela owaziko. Liqiniso, umfazi omKrestu uzabe angalihloniphi ilungiselelo lakaZimu lomtjhado nengabe usebenzisa amabanga angazwakaliko bona aphume emtjhadweni. Kodwana nengabe ubujamo obuyingozi khulu buragela phambili, akekho okufuze amsole nengabe ukhetha ukuhlala ngokuhlukana. Kungatjhiwo into efanako ngendoda emKrestu efuna ukuhlala ngokuhlukana. “Soke nje sojanyiswa phambi koZimu bona asahlulele.”—KwebeRoma 14:10.
INDLELA UMTJHADO OPHELAKO OWAPHULUSWA NGAYO
21. Ngikuphi okuhlangabezanwe nakho okutjengisa bona isiluleko seBhayibhili siyasebenza emtjhadweni?
21 Iinyanga eentathu ngemva kobana uLucia okukhulunywe ngaye ekuthomeni ahlukene nendodakwakhe, wahlangana naboFakazi BakaJehova wathoma ukufunda nabo iBhayibhili. Uthi: “Ngarareka khulu ngombana iBhayibhili yanginikela isisombululo esisebenzako emrarwenami. Ngemva kokufunda iveke kwaphela, msinyana ngafuna ukubuyelana nendodakwami. Namhlanje ngingathi uJehova uyakwazi ukuphulusa iimtjhado esengozini ngombana iimfundiso zakhe zisiza abalingani bona bafunde ukuhloniphana. Akusiliqiniso lokho okutjhiwo ngabanye bona aboFakazi bakaJehova bahlukanisa iimndeni. Endabenami kwenzeka okuhlukileko.” ULucia wafunda ukusebenzisa iinkambisolawulo zeBhayibhili ekuphileni kwakhe.
22. Khuyini boke abantu abatjhadileko okufuze bathembele kiyo?
22 AkusinguLucia yedwa owasizakalako. Umtjhado kufuze ube sibusiso ingasi umthwalo. Ngalokho, uJehova unikele umthombo omuhle khulu wesiluleko somtjhado owakhe watlolwa—iLizwi lakhe eliligugu. IBhayibhili “inikela ubuhlakani kilabo ababutlhogako.” (IRhalani 19:7-11) Iphuluse iimtjhado eemnengi egade isele izokuphela begodu ithuthukise eemnengi egade ineemraro emkhulu. Kwanga boke abantu abatjhadileko bangathembela ngokuzeleko esilulekweni somtjhado esivela kuJehova uZimu. Mbala siyasebenza!
[Imitlolo yaphasi]
a Ibizo litjhentjhiwe.
b Ezinye iingcenye zendaba le kucocwe ngazo ezahlukweni ezigadungileko.
c Ibizo leBhayibhili elitjhugululwa ngokuthi “ubufebe” libandakanya izenzo zokuphinga, ukuthandana kwabantu bobulili obufanako, ukulala nesilwana nezinye izenzo zangabomu ezingekho ngokomthetho kubandakanye nokusebenzisa izitho zobulili.
d Lokhu akubandakanyi ubujamo lapho indoda, nanyana inomnqopho omuhle, ibhalelwa kukondla umndenayo ngamabanga angaphezu kwamandlayo, anjengokugula namtjhana wokutlhoga umsebenzi.
IINKAMBISOLAWULO ZEBHAYIBHILEZI ZINGASIZA NJANI . . . BONA KUBALEKELWE UKUPHELA KOMTJHADO?
Umtjhado mthombo wakho kokubili ithabo namatshwenyeko.—Iziyema 5:18, 19; 1 KwebeKorinte 7:28.
Ukungavumelani kufuze kulungiswe msinyana.—Kwebe-Efesu 4:26.
Ekukhulumisaneni, ukulalela kuqakatheke njengokukhuluma.—KaJakobosi 1:19.
Ifanelo yemtjhadweni kufuze inikelwe ngomoya wokungabi marhamaru nesineke.—1 KwebeKorinte 7:3-5.
[Isithombe ekhasini 154]
Irarululeni msinyana iimraro. Ningavumeli ilanga litjhinge nisasilingekile