Ntimukareke gutoza umutima w’umwana wanyu!

UMUBUMBYI w’umuhanga ashobora kuvana mu ibumba rike igikoresho cyiza cyane. Ababumbyi bashobora kubumba ibikoresho byinshi bakoresheje ibumba rike, si benshi. Hashize imyaka ibarirwa mu bihumbi abantu bifashisha ibikoresho by’umubumbyi nk’ibikombe, amasahani, inkono, ibibindi n’imitako.

Iyo ababyeyi batoza abana babo imico myiza, baba bafatiye runini abantu bose muri rusange. Bibiliya igereranya buri wese muri twe n’ibumba, kandi Imana yahaye ababyeyi inshingano ikomeye yo kubumba “ibumba” rigize abana babo (Yobu 33:6; Itangiriro 18:19). Kimwe no kubumba igikoresho cyiza, kurera umwana akazavamo umuntu mukuru ushyira mu gaciro, ni umurimo utoroshye. Kugira ngo umwana ahinduke amere atyo, si ibintu bipfa kwizana gutya gusa.

Hari ibintu byinshi bihindura imitima y’abana bacu. Ikibabaje ni uko bimwe muri ibyo bintu byangiza. Ku bw’ibyo, umubyeyi w’umunyabwenge ntahwema gutoza umwana we, ahubwo amumenyereza “inzira akwiriye kunyuramo” yiringiye ko “azarinda asaza atarayivamo.”—Imigani 22:6.

Kurera abana ni umurimo w’ingenzi cyane ariko umara igihe kitari gito. Muri icyo gihe ababyeyi b’abanyabwenge b’Abakristo baba bagomba kugena igihe, bakarinda umwana wabo ibintu bibi bishobora kwangiza umutima we. Urukundo bakunda umwana wabo ruzagaragara koko igihe bazaba bamuha ‘uburere, bamuhana, bamwigisha iby’Umwami wacu’ babigiranye ubwitonzi (Abefeso 6:4). Birumvikana ko ako kazi ko kurera kazarushaho korohera ababyeyi igihe bazaba bagatangiye kuva umwana akiri muto.

Kurera umwana kuva akiri muto

Ababumbyi bishimira gukoresha ibumba ryasekuwe neza ushobora kubumbamo icyo ushatse cyose, ariko nanone rikaba rikomeye ku buryo icyo waribumbamo cyagumana ishusho ugihaye. Iyo bamaze kuritunganya, bahitamo kurikoresha amezi atandatu atarashira. Mu buryo nk’ubwo, igihe cyiza cyane ababyeyi baba bagomba kugorora umutima w’umwana wabo, ni igihe uwo mutima uba ushobora kwakira ibintu cyane no kugororwa mu buryo bworoshye.

Abahanga mu byo kurera abana bavuga ko umwana agira amezi umunani yaramaze kumenya amajwi y’ururimi rwe kavukire, yaratangiye kugirana imishyikirano ya bugufi n’ababyeyi be, yaranatangiye kureba no kwitegereza ibintu bimukikije. Igihe gikwiriye cyo gutangira gutoza umutima w’umwana, ni igihe aba akiri muto. Mbega ukuntu umwana wanyu azungukirwa naramuka ‘amenye ibyanditswe uhereye mu buto bwe,’ nk’uko byagendekeye Timoteyo!—2 Timoteyo 3:15.a

Abana usanga muri kamere yabo bigana ababyeyi babo. Uretse kuba bigana amajwi, imvugo n’ibimenyetso by’umubiri by’ababyeyi babo, banabigiraho gukunda, kugwa neza no kugira impuhwe mu gihe babona ababyeyi babo bagaragaza iyo mico. Mbere na mbere, niba twifuza gutoza abana bacu mu buryo buhuje n’amategeko ya Yehova, amategeko ye agomba kuba mu mitima yacu. Ababyeyi bafite bene iyo mitima yishimira amategeko y’Imana, bishimira guhora babwira abana babo ibihereranye na Yehova hamwe n’Ijambo rye. Bibiliya ibatera inkunga igira iti “ujye uyavuga wicaye mu nzu yawe, n’uko ugenda mu nzira n’uko uryamye n’uko ubyutse” (Gutegeka 6:6, 7). Francisco na Rosa basobanura ukuntu bigisha abana babo babiri amategeko y’Imana.b

Bagira bati “uretse ibiganiro bya buri munsi, tugerageza gukoresha nibura iminota 15 buri munsi tuganira na buri mwana. Iyo tubonye ko hari ikibazo, twongera igihe twajyaga tumarana; kandi koko duhura n’ibibazo. Urugero, umwana wacu ufite imyaka itanu aherutse kuva ku ishuri maze atubwira ko atemera Yehova. Birashoboka ko hari umunyeshuri bigana wari wamukwennye, maze akamubwira ko nta Mana ibaho.”

Abo babyeyi babonye ko abana babo bagomba kwihingamo umuco wo kwizera Umuremyi wabo. Kubera ko abana ubwabo baba bashishikazwa n’ibyo Imana yaremye, bishobora gutuma bayizera. Mbega ukuntu abana bakunda gushimashima inyamaswa, guca indabo, cyangwa gukinira ku musenyi! Ababyeyi babo bashobora kubafasha gushyira isano hagati y’ibyo bintu n’Umuremyi (Zaburi 100:3; 104:24, 25). Ibyo Yehova yaremye bishobora kuzajya bibashimisha kandi bakabiha agaciro mu mibereho yabo yose (Zaburi 111:2, 10). Iyo umwana amaze kubisobanukirwa neza, ashobora kugira icyifuzo cyo gushimisha Imana no gutinya kuyibabaza. Ibyo bizamusunikira ‘kureka ibibi.’—Imigani 16:6.

Nubwo abana benshi bagira amatsiko kandi bakiga ibintu vuba, kumvira byo bishobora kutoroha (Zaburi 51:5). Rimwe na rimwe, bashobora gutsimbarara bashaka gukora ibintu uko bishakiye cyangwa kubona buri kintu cyose bifuza. Kugira ngo iyo myifatire idashinga imizi mu mitima y’abana, ababyeyi baba bagomba kuba abantu batajenjeka, bihangana kandi bakabatoza imyifatire ikwiriye (Abefeso 6:4). Uko ni ko Phyllis na Paul, bareze neza abana babo batanu, babyifashemo.

Phyllis agira ati “kubera ko buri mwana ateye ukwe, buri wese yifuzaga gukora uko yishakiye. Ntibyari byoroshye. Ariko baje kumenya icyo kubabwira ngo ‘oya’ bisobanura.” Umugabo we Paul agira ati “akenshi, twabasobanuriraga impamvu twafashe imyanzuro runaka iyo babaga bamaze kuba bakuru ku buryo babyumva. Nubwo buri gihe twageragezaga kugwa neza, twabatozaga kubaha ubutware twahawe n’Imana.”

Ababyeyi benshi babona ko iyo umwana akiri muto aba afite ibibazo ahanganye na byo; icyakora, iyo amaze kugera mu gihe cy’imyaka y’amabyiruka, ahangana n’ibibazo bikomeye kurushaho, aho usanga umutima we woroshye uhangana n’ibigeragezo byinshi bishya.

Kugera ku mutima w’umwana uri mu myaka y’amabyiruka

Umubumbyi agomba gutangira kubumba ibumba ritaruma. Kugira ngo abone igihe gihagije cyo kuribumba, ashobora kuryongeramo amazi kugira ngo rikomeze rihehere kandi ryorohe. Mu buryo nk’ubwo, ababyeyi bagomba gushyiraho umwete kugira ngo barinde umutima w’umwana wabo akiri mu myaka y’amabyiruka kugira ngo ataba ikigande. Birumvikana ko igikoresho cy’ibanze bakoresha ari Bibiliya, yo ituma ‘bamwemeza ibyaha bye, bakamutunganya, bakanamuhanira gukiranuka.’—2 Timoteyo 3:15-17.

Nyamara kandi, umwana uri mu myaka y’amabyiruka ashobora kudahita yemera inama y’ababyeyi abikunze nk’uko byagendaga igihe yari akiri muto. Abana bari mu myaka y’amabyiruka bashobora gutangira kwita cyane ku rungano, ku buryo kuganira n’ababyeyi babo mu bwisanzure kandi nta cyo babakinga bishobora kugorana. Icyo ni cyo gihe ababyeyi baba bagomba kwihangana cyane kandi bagakoresha ubuhanga bwinshi, kubera ko ibintu biba byafashe indi ntera, zaba inshingano z’ababyeyi ndetse n’myifatire y’abana. Icyo gihe umwana aba agomba guhangana n’ihinduka ry’umubiri n’iry’ibyiyumvo. Aba agomba gutangira gufata imyanzuro no kwishyiriraho intego, bikaba bishobora kugira ingaruka mu mibereho ye yose (2 Timoteyo 2:22). Muri icyo gihe kigoye, aba agomba guhangana n’ikintu gishobora kwangiza umutima we, icyo kintu kikaba ari cyo moshya y’urungano.

Nta bwo ingaruka z’amoshya y’urungano zizahita zigaragara ako kanya. Ahubwo bizaza buhoro buhoro bitewe n’amagambo amuca intege bamubwira cyangwa ibindi bintu bamukorera bituma ashidikanya ibyo yari asanzwe yemera. Ibyo bimwibasira aho aba afite intege nke, kubera ko n’ubundi abakiri bato benshi bagira icyifuzo gikomeye cyo kwemerwa n’urungano. Kubera ko icyo gihe umwana aba ahangayikishijwe n’uko bagenzi be bamubona kandi yifuza kwemerwa na bo, ashobora gutangira kujya ashyigikira “ibiri mu isi” urubyiruko ruba ruharanira.—1 Yohana 2:15-17; Abaroma 12:2.

Birushaho kuba bibi iyo ibyifuzo kamere by’umutima udatunganye bishyigikiye ibyo urungano ruvuga. Inama nk’izi ngo “jya wishimisha,” kandi “ukore icyo umutima wifuza,” ashobora kumva nta ko zisa. Uwitwa María avuga uko byamugendekeye agira ati “numviye urungano rwemeraga ko abakiri bato bafite uburenganzira bwo kwishimisha uko bashaka batitaye ku byabageraho ibyo ari byo byose. Kubera ko nifuzaga gukora ibyo bagenzi banjye twiganaga bakoraga, nagarukiye kure.” Kubera ko uri umubyeyi, wifuza gufasha umwana wawe uri mu myaka y’amabyiruka kunesha ayo moshya; ariko se wabigeraho ute?

Binyuriye mu magambo no mu bikorwa, jya umwizeza ko umwitaho kandi umuhumurize. Jya wihatira kumenya uko abona ibintu, kandi ugerageze kumva ibibazo afite, bishobora kuba bikomeye cyane kurusha ibyo wahanganye na byo igihe wari ukiri umunyeshuri. Mu buryo bwihariye, icyo ni cyo gihe umwana wawe aba akeneye kukubonamo umuntu ashobora kwishyikiraho (Imigani 20:5). Mushobora kumenya ko ababaye cyangwa yabuze uko agira binyuriye ku bimenyetso by’umubiri cyangwa uko mubona ameze. Ujye umenya icyo akeneye n’iyo nta cyo yaba avuze, kandi ‘uhumurize umutima we.’—Abakolosayi 2:2.

Birumvikana ariko ko gukomera ku mahame agenga icyiza n’ikibi ari iby’ingenzi. Ababyeyi benshi babona ko hari ubwo badahita bumvikana n’abana babo. Ariko niba imyanzuro yabo ifite ishingiro, ntibashobora guterera iyo. Ku rundi ruhande, mujye mubanza kwiyumvisha neza uko ibintu byifashe mbere yo gufata umwanzuro wo gutanga igihano mu buryo bwuje urukundo n’ukuntu mwagitanga niba koko gikenewe.—Imigani 18:13.

Mu itorero na ho mugomba kubakurikirana

Umuntu ashobora kubumba igikoresho ateganya kuzagishyiramo ikintu gisukika, urugero nk’amazi. Icyo gikoresho gishobora gusa n’aho cyarangiye, ariko niba kitarotswa, gishobora kumeneka aramutse agishyizemo icyo kintu gisukika yakibumbiye. Ibigeragezo n’ingorane, Bibiliya ibigereranya n’icyo gikorwa cyo kotsa ibikoresho bikozwe mu ibumba kuko bigaragaza mu by’ukuri abo turi bo. Birumvikana ko Bibiliya yerekeza cyane cyane ku bigeragezo bigera ku kwizera kwacu; ariko muri rusange icyo gitekerezo kinarebana n’ibindi bigeragezo (Yakobo 1:2-4). Igitangaje ni uko ibigeragezo bimwe na bimwe bikomeye abakiri bato bahangana na byo, bishobora guturuka mu itorero.

Nubwo umwana wanyu uri mu myaka y’amabyiruka ashobora gusa n’aho ameze neza mu buryo bw’umwuka, ashobora kuba ahanganye n’ikibazo cyo kugira imitima ibiri (1 Abami 18:21). Urugero, uwitwa Megan yari ahanganye n’ikibazo cy’uko urundi rubyiruko rwazaga guterana mu Nzu y’Ubwami rwamushyiragamo ibitekerezo by’isi.

Yagize ati “nashutswe n’agatsiko k’urubyiruko rwabonaga ko Ubukristo ari ikintu kidashimishije kandi kibuza abantu kwishimisha. Wasangaga bavuga bati ‘ningera ku myaka 18, nzareka ukuri’ cyangwa ngo ‘ndambiwe ukuri.’ Bahungaga abo batavugaga rumwe, maze bakabavugiraho ngo ni abakiranutsi.”

Umwana umwe ufite imyifatire mibi cyangwa babiri, baba bahagije kugira ngo banduze abandi. Akenshi, abantu bake mu itsinda bakora ibyo abenshi bakoze. Ubupfapfa no kugira umutima wo guhangara bishobora gupfukirana ubwenge n’ikinyabupfura. Mu bihugu byinshi, hagiye habaho ingero zibabaje z’ukuntu Abakristo bakiri bato bagiye bishora mu bintu bibi bitewe no gukurikira abandi.

Birumvikana ko abari mu myaka y’amabyiruka baba bakeneye igihe runaka cyo kwishimisha. Ni gute wowe mubyeyi ushobora guhaza icyo cyifuzo? Jya utekereza neza ku myidagaduro yabo kandi utegure ibintu bishishikaje mukorera hamwe mu rwego rw’umuryango cyangwa muri kumwe n’urundi rubyiruko hamwe n’abantu bakuze. Jya umenya incuti z’umwana wawe. Zitumire kugira ngo musangire, cyangwa mufate umugoroba umwe mutaramane (Abaroma 12:13). Jya utera umwana wawe inkunga yo kwifatanya mu bikorwa byiza, urugero nko kwiga gucuranga, kwiga urundi rurimi cyangwa umwuga. Ahanini, ibyo ashobora kubikorera mu mimerere myiza yo mu rugo.

Ishuri rishobora kuba uburinzi

Kujya ku ishuri bishobora na byo gufasha umwana uri mu myaka y’amabyiruka gushyira imyidagaduro mu mwanya wayo. Uwitwa Loli, akaba amaze imyaka 20 ari umuyobozi mu kigo kinini cy’amashuri, agira ati “nabonye abana b’Abahamya benshi bajya ku ishuri. Abenshi baba bafite imyifatire myiza, ariko hari bamwe udashobora gutandukanya n’abandi banyeshuri. Buri gihe, usanga abashishikazwa no kwiga ari bo batanga urugero rwiza. Ndifuza nkomeje guha ababyeyi inama y’uko bashishikazwa n’amajyambere y’abana babo mu mashuri, bakamenya abarimu babo kandi bakemeza abana babo ko kugira amanota meza ari ibintu by’ingenzi. Birumvikana ko bamwe bashobora kugira amanota meza cyane, ariko bose bashobora kugera ku rugero rushimishije kandi bakubahwa n’abarimu babo.”

Kujya ku ishuri bishobora no gufasha abari mu myaka y’amabyiruka gukura mu buryo bw’umwuka. Bishobora kubatoza kugira akamenyero keza ko kwiyigisha, kandi bigatoza ubwenge bwabo kumva ko hari inshingano ibareba. Nta gushidikanya ko ubushobozi bagira bwo kumenya gusoma no gusobanukirwa ibintu buzabatera inkunga yo kuba abigishwa n’abigisha beza cyane b’Ijambo ry’Imana (Nehemiya 8:8). Imikoro yo ku ishuri no kwiga ibintu byo mu buryo bw’umwuka bishobora kubafasha kugenera imyidagaduro umwanya ukwiriye.

Bizabahesha ishema mwebwe hamwe na Yehova

Mu Bugiriki bwa kera, ibikoresho byinshi byabaga bikozwe mu ibumba byabaga biriho umukono w’uwabibumbye n’uwabitatse. Tubigereranyije no mu muryango, incuro nyinshi haba hari abantu babiri bagira uruhare mu kurera abana. Se na nyina bafatanya gutoza umutima w’umwana, maze mu buryo bw’ikigereranyo umwana agashyirwaho “umukono” wabo. Kimwe n’umubumbyi wabumbye ikintu cyiza cyangwa uwagitatse, mushobora guheshwa ishema no kuba mwarareze umwana akavamo umuntu ufite agaciro kandi mwiza.—Imigani 23:24, 25.

Kugira icyo mugeraho ahanini bizaterwa n’urugero mwatojemo umutima w’umwana wanyu. Turiringira ko mushobora kuzavuga muti “amategeko y’Imana ye ari mu mutima we, nta ntambwe ze zizanyerera” (Zaburi 37:31). Gutoza umutima w’umwana ni ibintu by’ingenzi cyane ku buryo bidapfa kwizana gutya gusa.

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]