Fasha abo duhuje ukwizera batanye n’abo bashakanye—Wabikora ute?

Umugore uhumuriza mushiki wacu watanye n’uwo bari barashakanye

Ushobora kuba uzi umuntu watanye n’uwo bashakanye, ndetse wenda ukaba uzi benshi. Ibyo biterwa n’uko gutana kw’abashakanye byogeye. Urugero, ubushakashatsi bwakorewe muri Polonye bwagaragaje ko abantu bafite imyaka 30 bamaze imyaka iri hagati y’itatu n’itandatu bashyingiranywe baba bashobora kuzatana; kandi abafite iyo myaka si bo bonyine baba bashobora gutana.

Koko rero, hari ikigo cyita ku mibereho y’umuryango cyagize kiti “raporo zigaragaza ko kimwe cya kabiri cy’abashyingiranwa [mu Burayi] baba bazatana” (Institute for Family Policy in Spain). Mu bindi bihugu byateye imbere na ho ni uko bimeze.

UMUNTU AGIRA IBYIYUMVO BITANDUKANYE

Ni iki cyihishe inyuma y’icyo cyorezo? Hari umujyanama w’inararibonye mu by’ishyingiranwa wo mu Burayi bw’i Burasirazuba wavuze ati “gutana bishyira ahabona ibiba byaramaze kuba. Imibanire y’abashakanye iba yarazambye, hagakurikiraho gutandukana, kandi ibyo bitera agahinda kenshi.” Yongeyeho ko akenshi nyuma yaho umuntu agira “ibyiyumvo bikomeye; agira uburakari, akumva yicuza, akamanjirwa, akiheba kandi akumva afite ikimwaro.” Rimwe na rimwe ibyo bituma umuntu yumva ashaka kwiyahura. Yakomeje agira ati “iyo urukiko rumaze kwemeza ubutane, umuntu atangira kugira ibindi byiyumvo. Uwatanye yumva nta cyo ari cyo kandi ari mu bwigunge, akaba yakwibaza ati ‘ese ko tumaze gutana, ubu noneho ndi igiki? Ubuzima bwanjye buragana he?’ ”

Ewa yibutse uko yumvaga ameze mu myaka runaka ishize, maze agira ati “igihe nari maze gutana n’uwo twashakanye, iyo abaturanyi n’abo twakoranaga bavugaga ko ndi umugore watanye n’umugabo, numvaga mfite ikimwaro. Byarandakazaga cyane. Kubera ko nasigaranye abana babiri bakiri bato, nagombaga kubabera nyina nkanababera se.”a Adam wamaze imyaka 12 ari umusaza wubahwa yaravuze ati “numva narisuzuguye cyane ku buryo rimwe na rimwe numva mfite umujinya, kandi nkumva nakwitarura abandi.”

BAHATANIRA KONGERA GUTUZA

Nyuma yo gutana, hari bamwe bamara imyaka myinshi bahatanira kongera gutuza kubera ko baba bahangayikishijwe n’imibereho yabo yo mu gihe kizaza. Bashobora kumva ko abandi batabitayeho. Ikindi kandi, hari umunyamakuru wandika ibirebana no gutana wavuze ko abatanye n’abo bashakanye “baba bagomba kugira ibyo bahindura maze bakiga guhangana n’ibibazo bonyine.”

Stanisław agira ati “igihe nari maze gutana n’umugore wanjye, yangaga ko mbonana n’udukobwa twanjye tubiri. Ibyo byatumye numva ko nta muntu wari ukinyitayeho, kandi ko na Yehova agomba kuba yarantaye. Numvaga ntagishaka kubaho. Nyuma y’igihe nabonye ko nari mfite imitekerereze idakwiriye.” Umugore witwa Wanda watanye n’umugabo we na we yumvaga ahangayikishijwe n’imibereho ye yo mu gihe kizaza. Yagize ati “numvaga rwose ko abantu bose, hakubiyemo n’abo duhuje ukwizera, batari kujya banyitaho, ntibite no ku bana banjye. Ariko kandi, ubu mbona ko abavandimwe batwitayeho kandi baramfashije mu gihe nihatiraga kurera abana banjye kugira ngo bazabe abagaragu ba Yehova.”

Uhereye ku byo abo bantu bagiye bavuga, ushobora kubona ko bamwe bagira ibitekerezo bidakwiriye iyo bamaze gutana n’abo bashakanye. Bashobora kumva biyanze, bagatekereza ko nta cyo bamaze kandi ko badakwiriye kwitabwaho. Uretse n’ibyo, bashobora gutangira kunenga abandi. Ibyo bishobora gutuma batangira gutekereza ko abagize itorero batabakunda, kandi ko batishyira mu mwanya wabo. Ariko kandi, ibyabaye kuri Stanisław na Wanda bigaragaza ko abatanye n’abo bashakanye bashobora kugera aho bakabona ko abavandimwe na bashiki bacu babitaho rwose. Mu by’ukuri, Abakristo bagenzi babo babitayeho cyane, nubwo mu mizo ya mbere batabibonaga.

MU GIHE BUMVA BARI MU BWIGUNGE KANDI BATITAWEHO

Uzirikane ko nubwo twaba dukora uko dushoboye kose kugira ngo twite kuri bagenzi bacu duhuje ukwizera batanye n’abo bashakanye, hari igihe bashobora kumva bari mu bwigunge. Mu buryo bwihariye, bashiki bacu duhuje ukwizera bashobora gutekereza ko abantu batabitaho. Uwitwa Alicja yagize ati “hashize imyaka umunani ntandukanye n’umugabo wanjye. Ariko n’ubu hari igihe numva nisuzuguye. Mu bihe nk’ibyo, mba numva nakwitarura abandi maze nkarira, kandi mba numva mpangayikishijwe cyane n’ibibazo byanjye.”

Nubwo umuntu watanye n’uwo bashakanye atabura kugira ibyiyumvo nk’ibyo tumaze kuvuga, Bibiliya itanga inama ivuga ko kwitarura abandi bidakwiriye. Gukora ibinyuranye n’iyo nama bishobora gutuma umuntu yanga “ubwenge bwose” (Imig 18:1). Icyakora, umuntu wumva ari mu bwigunge yagombye gusobanukirwa ko iyo yirinze guhora ashakira ihumure n’inama ku wo badahuje igitsina, aba agaragaje ubwenge. Ibyo bibarinda kugirana urukundo rw’agahararo.

Bagenzi bacu duhuje ukwizera batanye n’abo bashakanye bashobora kugira ibyiyumvo bibabuza amahwemo, harimo kumva bahangayikishijwe n’imibereho yabo yo mu gihe kizaza, ndetse bakumva bari mu bwigunge cyangwa ko abandi batabitaho. Kuzirikana ko kugira ibyiyumvo nk’ibyo ari ibintu bisanzwe kandi ko kubinesha bitoroha byagombye gutuma twigana Yehova, tugakomeza gushyigikira abo bavandimwe na bashiki bacu (Zab 55:22; 1 Pet 5:6, 7). Dushobora kwiringira tudashidikanya ko bazishimira cyane ubufasha bwose tuzabaha. Mu by’ukuri, mu itorero bazahabona incuti nyakuri zizabafasha.—Imig 17:17; 18:24.

a Amazina amwe n’amwe yarahinduwe.

Kubona ibyo gutana kw’abashakanye mu buryo bushyize mu gaciro

Abagaragu ba Yehova bafatana uburemere ishyingiranwa. Ibyo biterwa n’uko tubona ibintu mu buryo buhuje n’Ibyanditswe. Urugero, muri Malaki 2:16 Imana yavuze mu buryo bweruye iti ‘nanga abatana.’ Ibyanditswe bigaragaza ko iyo umwe mu bashakanye akoze icyaha cy’ubusambanyi ari bwo gusa baba bashobora gutana. Bityo rero, kwihingamo igitekerezo cyo gutana n’uwo mwashakanye mu buryo bunyuranyije n’Ibyanditswe, wenda ugambiriye gushyingiranwa n’undi, ni ikosa rikomeye cyane.—Intang 2:22-24; Guteg 5:21; Mat 19:4-6, 9.

Ariko kandi, iyo Umukristo atanye n’uwo bashakanye wenda bitewe n’uko yamuciye inyuma, abavandimwe na bashiki bacu bo mu itorero baramushyigikira. Bigana Yehova bagakora uko bashoboye kose kugira ngo bafashe abakiranutsi bamara igihe runaka bafite “umutima ushenjaguwe.”—Zab 34:15, 18; Yes 41:10.

WABAFASHA UTE?

Ese ushobora kwita ku bakeneye cyane gufashwa? Wakora iki kugira ngo ufashe umuntu ufite ibyiyumvo nk’iby’abantu bavuzwe muri iyi ngingo? Reba icyo Bibiliya ivuga, n’ukuntu Abakristo b’indahemuka bafashije mu buryo bugaragara abari babikeneye.

Jya ubatega amatwi ubigiranye ubushishozi. (Imig 16:20, 23)

Ushobora kwiyumvisha ko nyuma y’uko umuntu atana n’uwo bashakanye ashobora kumva adashaka kuvuga buri kantu kose katumye batana. N’ubundi kandi, kuvuga ibyamubabaje byose bishobora kutagira icyo bitanga kandi ntibimugabanyirize imihangayiko (Imig 12:25; Rom 12:15). Michał wafashije Adam twigeze kuvuga, yemera ko ushobora kugaragariza umuntu impuhwe kandi ukamutega amatwi ubigiranye ubushishozi bitabaye ngombwa ko umenya ibye byose. Yagize ati “nagerageje gufasha Adam kujya azirikana ko mu gihe yacitse intege bitewe n’ibibazo byamurenze, ashobora kumbwira ikintu nyuma yaho akicuza impamvu yakimbwiye.” Bityo, Michał yagaragarije Adam ko atashakaga kumenya ibye byose. Icyakora, yamutegaga amatwi nk’incuti nyakuri. Mbere y’amateraniro ya gikristo cyangwa nyuma yayo, nabwo dushobora kugera ku bintu byinshi byiza tubwira abatanye n’abo bashakanye amagambo yoroheje, nk’aya ngo “urumva umeze ute? Nzi ko uhanganye n’ibibazo bitoroshye. Ndakuzirikana rwose!”

Jya ugaragaza ko ubitaho. (Fili 2:4)

Mirosław yagize ati “jye n’umugore wanjye twateganyije igihe cyo gufasha mushiki wacu watanye n’uwo bashakanye. Urugero, twamukoreye iserire y’urugi. Nanone kandi, twamujyanaga kwa muganga.” Ibyo bishobora gusa n’aho ari ibintu byoroheje, ariko byari ingirakamaro kandi byaramufashije. Uwo mushiki wacu bafashije yongeye kumva atuje. Ikiruta byose, nyuma yaho yakoze umurimo w’ubupayiniya kandi umukobwa we w’imyaka 11 arabatizwa.

Jya wizeza uwatanye n’uwo bashakanye ko Yehova asobanukiwe imimerere arimo.

Niba umuntu yumva yisuzuguye, ushobora kumwizeza ko Imana iha agaciro buri wese mu bagaragu bayo. Mu by’ukuri, ‘turusha ibishwi byinshi agaciro’; turihariye kandi dufite agaciro kenshi mu maso yayo (Mat 10:29-31). Kubera ko ‘Yehova ari we ugenzura imitima,’ yiyumvisha uko abatanye n’abo bashakanye bamerewe. Nta n’umwe mu bagaragu be bizerwa azatererana (Imig 17:3; Zab 145:18; Heb 13:5). Bityo rero, uko ukomeza kugaragariza uwatanye n’uwo bashakanye ko umwitayeho, ujye umwizeza ko Imana yishimira ko akunda ukuri, n’imihati ashyiraho ashyigikira ugusenga k’ukuri.—Fili 2:29.

Jya ushishikariza uwatanye n’uwo bashakanye gukomeza kuba hafi y’itorero.

Iyo bamwe bafite ibyiyumvo bibarwaniramo, bumva kujya mu materaniro bibagoye. Ariko ayo materaniro ni yo adukomeza kandi akadutera inkunga, mbese ‘akatwubaka’ (1 Kor 14:26; Zab 122:1). Imihati abasaza bashyiraho kugira ngo babibateremo inkunga ni iy’agaciro kenshi. Wanda twavuze mbere yagize ati “na n’ubu twibuka ukuntu batwitayeho babigiranye urukundo.”

Jya utera uwatanye n’uwo bashakanye inkunga yo gukomeza imishyikirano afitanye n’Imana binyuze ku isengesho, kwiyigisha no gutekereza ku byo yiga. (Yak 4:8)

Nubwo Yehova ashobora byose kandi akaba ari mu ijuru, yita ku ‘mbabare ifite umutima umenetse, igahindishwa umushyitsi n’ijambo rye.’ Ujye ubyizeza uwatanye n’uwo bashakanye, kandi umwereke ko twese dufashwa no kurushaho kwegera Imana binyuze ku isengesho no kwiyigisha.—Yes 66:2.

Mutumire mujyane mu murimo wo kubwiriza cyangwa mutegurire hamwe amateraniro.

Ibyo bizafasha Umukristo watanye n’uwo bashakanye kurushaho kwigirira icyizere. Marta wafashije mushiki wacu wagiraga ishyaka, wumvaga yaracitse intege nyuma yo gutana n’uwo bashakanye, yagize ati “buri gihe tujyana mu murimo wo kubwiriza. Iyo tugeze ku ntego twishyiriyeho turishima. Rimwe na rimwe dutegurira hamwe amateraniro, hanyuma tugateka ibyokurya biryoshye.