Igice cya 9
Kurera Abana Uhereye mu Buto Bwabo
1-4. Hari gihamya yihe y’uko umwana muto aba afite ubushobozi buhambaye bwo kwiga?
UBWENGE bw’uruhinja rukivuka bugereranywa n’urupapuro rutanditsweho. Mu by’ukuri, hari ibintu byinshi biba byaracapwe mu bwenge bw’umwana mu gihe aba akiri mu nda ya nyina. Ibintu bimwe biranga kamere ye biba byaramaze kwandikwa mu buryo budahanagurika mu ngirabuzima fatizo zigenga iby’iyororoka. Ariko aba afite ubushobozi butangaje bwo kwiga kuva avutse na nyuma y’aho. Aho kuba rero nk’agapapuro koroheje gusa, ahubwo aba ameze nk’inzu y’ibitabo byinshi cyane biba bitegereje kwandikwamo ibintu.
2 Uburemere bw’ubwonko bw’uruhinja ni icya kane cy’uburemere bw’ubwonko bw’umuntu mukuru. Ariko ubwonko bukura vuba cyane ku buryo mu gihe cy’imyaka ibiri gusa buba bugeze kuri bitatu bya kane by’uburemere bw’ubwonko bw’umuntu mukuru! Ubwenge na bwo bwiyongera vuba cyane. Abashakashatsi bavuga ko ubwenge bw’umwana bwiyongera cyane mu myaka ine ya mbere y’ubuzima bwe kimwe n’uko bwiyongera mu myaka cumi n’itatu ikurikiraho. Mu by’ukuri hari abemeza ko “ibyo umwana amenya mbere y’uko agira imyaka itanu biba bigoye cyane kurusha ibyo aziga mu buzima bwe bwose.”
3 Hari ibintu by’ifatizo nk’ibihereranye no kumenya iburyo n’ibumoso, hejuru no hasi, icyuzuye n’ikirimo ubusa, ndetse n’isano iri hagati y’uburebure n’uburemere, twe tuba tubona ari ibintu bisanzwe. Nyamara umwana we aba agomba kwiga ibyo bintu byose ndetse n’ibindi byinshi. Ndetse n’ibintu bigize imvugo biba bigomba gushinga imizi no gushyirwa kuri gahunda mu bwenge bw’uruhinja.
4 Abantu bamwe bemeza ko “kuvuga ari cyo kintu gikomeye cyane gisaba ubuhanga kurusha ibindi bintu byose umuntu ashobora kugeraho.” Niba warigeze ukora imihati yo kwiga ururimi rushya, nta gushidikanya ko ibyo nawe ari ko wabibonye. Icyakora naba nawe nibura wari uzi uko ururimi rukora. Ku bihereranye n’uruhinja rwo si ko bimeze, nyamara kandi ubwenge bwarwo bukaba bufite ubushobozi bwo kumenya ibihereranye n’ururimi kimwe no kurukoresha. Si ibyo gusa, abana bato cyane baba mu ngo cyangwa ahantu indimi ebyiri zikoreshwa, bashobora kuvuga izo ndimi zombi nta kibazo—ndetse na mbere y’uko bageza ku myaka yo gutangira ishuri! Bityo rero, baba bafite ubwenge butegereje gutezwa imbere.
ICYO NI CYO GIHE CYO GUTANGIRA!
5. Kurera umwana bigomba gutangira kare mu rugero rungana iki?
5 Ubwo intumwa Pawulo yandikiraga mugenzi wayo Timoteyo, yamwibukije ko yari yaramenye Ibyanditswe byera ‘ahereye mu buto bwe’ (2 Timoteyo 3:15). Umubyeyi uzi ubwenge ni we umenya ko umwana we afite inzara y’umwimerere yo kumenya. Abana bato baritegereza cyane, bahora bari maso kandi babanguye n’amatwi. Ababyeyi babimenya batabimenya, abana bato bahora barundanya ubumenyi, babubika bakurikije inzego zabwo, babwongera kandi bafata imyanzuro ibuturutseho. Mu by’ukuri ababyeyi batagize amakenga, mu gihe gito umwana muto yaba yize mu buryo butangaje ukuntu yabifatira kugira ngo agere ku cyo ashaka. Bityo rero, inama itangwa mu Ijambo ry’Imana, ngo “menyereza umwana inzira akwiriye kunyuramo; azarinda asaza, atarayivamo,” irareba igihe cyo kuva ku ivuka, na nyuma y’aho (Imigani 22:6). Birumvikana ko amasomo ya mbere yigishwa ari ahereranye n’urukundo, aherekejwe n’ukwitabwaho mu buryo bwuje urukundo. Icyakora, igikorwa cyo gucyaha mu rukundo ariko mu buryo buhamye kigomba kujyana na byo.
6. (a) Ni iyihe mvugo ikwiriye gukoreshwa kurusha izindi mu gihe cyo kuvugisha umwana? (b) Umuntu yagombye gufata ate ibibazo byinshi umwana amuhundagazaho?
6 Ntukavugishe umwana muto mu “mvugo ya cyana,” ahubwo ujye ukoresha imvugo yoroshye y’abantu bakuru, kuko ari yo ushaka ko yiga. Iyo umwana yiga kuvuga, aguhundagazaho ibibazo byinshi by’urudaca, wenda ati ‘kuki imvura igwa? Nakomotse hehe? Ku manywa inyenyeri zijya hehe? Urimo urakora iki? Ni kuki bimeze bitya? Ni kuki bimeze kuriya?’ Bikomeza ubudakama! Bitegere amatwi, kubera ko ibibazo ari bimwe mu bikoresho byiza cyane umwana yifashisha yiga. Gupfukirana ibibazo bye bishobora kubangamira imikurire y’ubwenge bwe.
7. Ni ubuhe buryo bwiza bushobora gukoreshwa mu gusubiza ibibazo by’umwana, kandi se, kuki?
7 Ariko ujye uzirikana aya magambo y’intumwa yagize iti “nkiri umwana muto, navugaga nk’umwana muto, ngatekereza nk’umwana muto, nkibwira nk’umwana muto” (1 Abakorinto 13:11). Gerageza gusubiza ibibazo neza uko ushoboye, ariko mu buryo bworoheje kandi bugufi. Iyo umwana abajije ati ‘kuki imvura igwa?’ nta bwo aba akeneye igisubizo gihambaye, gifite ubusobanuro burambuye. Kumusubiza uti ‘ibicu biremeramo amazi maze ayo mazi akagwa’ bishobora kumunyura. Igihe umwana amara yita ku kintu ni kigufi; ahita ajya ku bindi bitekerezo. Bityo rero, nk’uko uha umwana amata kugeza igihe azashobora kurya ibiryo bikomeye, ujye umuha n’ubusobanuro bworoshye kugeza igihe azashobora kumva ubusobanuro burambuye cyane.—Gereranya n’Abaheburayo 5:13, 14.
8, 9. Ni iki cyakorwa kugira ngo, buhoro buhoro, umuntu yigishe umwana gusoma?
8 Kwiga bigomba gukorwa buhoro buhoro. Nk’uko byavuzwe, Timoteyo yari yaratojwe Ibyanditswe kuva mu buto bwe. Biragaragara ko mu bintu byabayeho kera mu bwana bwe yashoboraga kwibuka, harimo no kwigishwa ibya Bibiliya. Nta gushidikanya ko ibyo byakozwe buhoro buhoro, mbese nk’uko muri iki gihe, se w’umwana cyangwa nyina batangira kwigisha umwana gusoma. Somera umwana wawe. Igihe akiri muto, ujye umucigatira, umukikize akaboko kawe maze umusomere mu ijwi ryiza. Azagira ibyiyumvo by’umutekano n’ibyishimo, kandi no gusoma bizaba ari ikintu gishimishije kuri we n’ubwo azaba yumvamo duke cyane. Nyuma y’aho wazamwigisha inyuguti, nko mu buryo bw’umukino wenda. Uzakurikizaho gukora amagambo, amaherezo ukore interuro mu magambo. Ukore uko ushoboye kugira ngo kwiga bibe ikintu gishimishije.
9 Urugero, nk’umugore n’umugabo basomeraga umwana wabo w’imyaka itatu mu ijwi riranguruye, batunga urutoke buri jambo kugira ngo umwana akurikire. Hari amagambo amwe bageragaho bagasa n’abahagarara, maze umwana akaba ari we ukomeza ijambo rikurikiraho nk’“Imana,” “Yesu,” “umugabo,” “igiti.” Buhoro buhoro amagambo yashoboraga gusoma yariyongereye, ku buryo yagize imyaka ine asoma hafi amagambo yose. Gusoma biherekezwa no kwandika, umuntu akabanziriza ku nyuguti ukwazo, maze agakora amagambo yuzuye. Iyo umwana amenye kwandika nk’izina rye, asabwa n’ibyishimo cyane!
10. Ni kuki ari iby’ubwenge gufasha buri mwana kongera ubushobozi bwe bwite?
10 Buri mwana arihariye, afite kamere yihariye, bityo akaba agomba gufashwa gukura mu buryo buhuje n’ubushobozi kimwe n’impano yarazwe. Nimutoza buri mwana kongera ububasha n’ubushobozi yarazwe, ntibizaba ngombwa ko yumva yifuza ibyo abandi bana bageraho. Buri mwana yagombye gukundwa no gushimwa ku bw’icyo ari cyo. Iyo umufasha kunesha cyangwa kugenzura ibimukururira gukora ibibi, nta bwo wagombye gusa n’umucisha mu iforomo wateganije mbere y’igihe. Ahubwo ujye umuyobora mu gukoresha neza ibyiza bigize kamere ye.
11. Ni kuki atari iby’ubwenge kugereranya umwana n’undi usa n’ugamije kumushyira hasi?
11 Umubyeyi ashobora gusa n’ushyira mu mwana umwuka w’ubwikunde wo kurushanwa igihe amugereranya n’undi amwumvisha ko hari icyo amurusha cyangwa se ko ari hasi ye. N’ubwo abana bato bagaragaza ibimenyetso by’ubwikunde bwa kavukire kare cyane, ubundi mu mizo ya mbere nta nzego, gusumbana cyangwa kwiyumva ko umuntu akomeye biba biri mu bitekerezo byabo. Ni yo mpamvu Yesu yigeze gutanga urugero rw’umwana muto igihe yashakaga gukosora umwuka wo kwishyira hejuru no gushishikazwa no kumva bakomeye, abigishwa be bigeze kugaragaza igihe kimwe (Matayo 18:1-4). Bityo rero, ujye wirinda kugereranya umwana n’undi usa n’ugamije kumushyira hasi. Ibyo umwana ashobora kubifata nk’aho ari ukumwanga. Icya mbere azumva ababaye, kandi nakomeza gufatwa atyo, ashobora kukuzinukwa. Ku rundi ruhande, umwana ufatwa nk’aho asumba abandi ashobora kuzaba umwibone, bikazamuviramo kwangwa n’abandi. Wowe mubyeyi, gukunda no kwemera umwana wawe ntibyagombye gushingira ku kumugereranya n’abandi. Birashimisha cyane kubona ibintu binyuranye. Itorero ry’abaririmbyi rigira ibikoresho byinshi binyuranye bituma umuzika uba ugizwe n’amajwi anyuranye kandi ukungahaye, ariko kandi byose bikaba bifite injyana. Kamere zitandukanye zongera ibyishimo no gushishikazwa mu rwego rw’umuryango, icyakora abagize umuryango bose baramutse bagendeye ku mahame akiranuka y’Umuremyi wabo, ni bwo bashobora kutabangamira imishyikirano yabo.
FASHA UMWANA WAWE MU MIKURIRE YE
12. Ni bintu ki bihereranye n’abantu bakuze bigaragaza ko umwana akeneye ubuyobozi bukwiriye?
12 Ijambo ry’Imana rivuga ko ‘bitari mu muntu ugenda kwitunganiriza intambwe ze’ (Yeremiya 10:23). Abantu bo bavuga ko ibyo bishoboka. Bityo, banga ubuyobozi bw’Imana, bagashaka ubuyobozi bwa kimuntu, bakagenda bakubitana n’ingorane z’urudaca, maze amaherezo bikagaragara ko ibyo ari byo byose Imana ifite ukuri. Yehova Imana avuga ko hari inzira isa n’ikiranuka mu maso y’umuntu, ariko amaherezo yayo ikaba ari inzira y’urupfu (Imigani 14:12). Kuva kera abantu bakurikiye inzira yasaga n’ikiranuka kuri bo, ariko yabaganishije ku ntambara, ku nzara, ku burwayi no ku rupfu. Mbese, niba amaherezo y’inzira isa n’aho ikiranuka ku muntu ukuze w’inararibonye ari urupfu, ubwo inzira isa n’aho ikiranuka ku mwana yashobora kuganisha hehe? Niba bitari mu muntu ugenda kwitunganiriza intambwe ze, ni mu buryo ki byaba biri mu mwana ucyiga kugenda kwitunganiriza intambwe z’ubuzima bwe? Umuremyi aha umubyeyi n’umwana amabwiriza binyuriye mu Ijambo rye.
13, 14. Ni gute ababyeyi bakwiriye kwigisha abana, bakurikije inama yo mu Gutegeka 6:6, 7?
13 Imana ibwira ababyeyi iti “aya mategeko ngutegeka uyu munsi, ahore ku mutima wawe; ujye ugira umwete wo kuyigisha abana bawe, ujye uyavuga wicaye mu nzu yawe, n’uko ugenda mu nzira, n’uko uryamye, n’uko ubyutse” (Gutegeka 6:6, 7). Igihe icyo ari cyo cyose, uko habonetse uburyo, inyigisho yagombye gutangwa. Iyo umuryango ufatira hamwe ibyo kurya bya mu gitondo, n’ubwo kuri benshi mu gitondo hashobora kuba ari igihe cyo kwihuta, bitegura kujya ku kazi cyangwa se ku ishuri, amagambo make yo gushimira ku bw’iryo funguro ashobora kwerekeza ibitekerezo byabo ku Muremyi, kandi ashobora kuba anakubiyemo n’izindi ngingo z’agaciro mu buryo bw’umwuka zishobora gufasha umuryango. Ahari wenda hashobora kuboneka igihe cyo kuvuga ku bikorwa by’uwo munsi mutangiye, cyangwa ku bihereranye n’ishuri n’inama zirimo ubwenge zo guhangana n’ibibazo bishobora kuvuka. Igihe cyo kuryama, “uko uryamye,” gishobora kuba igihe cy’umunezero ku bana bato iyo ababyeyi babitayeho by’umwihariko. Abana bato bashishikazwa cyane n’inkuru babarirwa bagiye kuryama, ku buryo bishobora kubabera uburyo bwiza bwo kubigisha. Bibiliya yuzuyemo ingingo ziba zikeneye kwitabwaho n’ababyeyi mu buryo bw’ubwenge n’igishyuhirane kugira ngo zishimishe cyane umwana. Ibyakubayeho mu buzima bwawe na byo bizashishikaza abana bawe mu buryo bwihariye, kandi bishobora gutanga amasomo meza. Kandi n’ubwo kubona inkuru nshya zo kubara byasa n’aho bitoroshye, akenshi uzasanga umwana yishimira ko umusubirira mu nkuru zimwe incuru nyinshi. Uzasanga guharira abana bawe icyo gihe cy’inyongera bikorohereza uburyo bwo gushyikirana na bo. Gufata isengesho hamwe n’abana bato igihe cyo kujya kuryama na byo bishobora gufasha mu kwishyiriraho mbere y’igihe urufatiro rwiza rwo kugirana imishyikirano n’Ubafatiye runini cyane mu bihereranye no kubayobora kimwe no kubarinda.—Abefeso 3:20; Abafilipi 4:6, 7.
14 Aho waba uri hose, ‘wicaye mu nzu’ cyangwa ugenda ‘mu nzira,’ uba ufite uburyo bwo kurera umwana wawe mu buryo bushimishije kandi bw’ingirakamaro. Ku byerekeye abana, bumwe muri ubwo buryo bushobora gukorwa mu buryo bw’umukino. Dore icyo umugabo umwe n’umugore bashakanye bigeze kuvuga ku bihereranye n’akamaro ibyo byagize mu gufasha abana kwibuka ingingo zasuzumwe mu materaniro y’icyigisho cya Bibiliya:
‘Umugoroba umwe twajyanye agahungu k’imyaka itandatu kajyaga gakunda kurangara cyane mu materaniro. Ubwo twajyaga ku nzu y’ubwami, nagize nti “reka dukine. Nidutaha tuze kureba niba turi buze kuba twibuka indirimbo zimwe ziribuze kuba zaririmbwe kimwe na zimwe mu ngingo z’ingenzi ziraba zasuzumwe mu materaniro.” Mu mataha twarumiwe cyane. Ako kana k’agahungu karangaraga cyane ubusanzwe, kahawe ijambo mbere maze dusanga kibuka nyinshi mu ngingo zasuzumwe. Abana bacu bakurikiyeho, bongeraho ibitekerezo byabo maze natwe twembi abakuru tugira icyo tubivugaho. Aho gusa n’ibibananiza, byababereye nk’umukino ushimishije cyane.’
15. Ni gute umwana yaterwa inkunga yo kurushaho gutunganya neza ibyo akora?
15 Uko umwana agenda akura, ni ko agenda yiga gutanga ibitekerezo bye, gushushanya ibintu, gukora imirimo imwe n’imwe, no gusa n’ucuranga ibikoresho by’umuzika. Yishimira kumva hari icyo agezeho. Mu buryo runaka, umurimo we uba ufitanye isano n’ukwaguka kwe. Kuri we, uwo murimo uba ari ikintu cyihariye cyane. Si iyo umurebye rero ukamubwira uti ‘ni byiza,’ yewe, ibyishimo biramusaga cyane. Shaka ikintu mu byo yakoze ushobora kumushimira ubikuye ku mutima, bizamutera inkunga. Na ho ubundi uramutse uhubutse ukabigaya cyane, bishobora gutuma yigunga maze agacika intege. Bibaye ngombwa ushobora kugira icyo umubaza ku bihereranye n’ingingo runaka y’icyo gikorwa cye, ariko ntukamwumvishe ko ukigaye. Urugero, aho kugira ngo ufate ibyo yishushanyirije we ubwe maze ngo ubisubiremo, wagombye kugaragaza ukuntu yabikora neza kurushaho ukoresheje urundi rupapuro. Ibyo byatuma abona uko yikosorera igishushanyo cye aramutse abishatse. Iyo utera umuhati we inkunga, uba uteye inkunga imikurire ye, ariko numunenga cyane umugaya, uzamuca intege cyangwa upfukirane icyifuzo cye cyo gukomeza kugerageza. Ni byo koko, ihame ryo mu Bagalatiya 6:4 rishobora gukoreshwa no ku bana: “ibyiza ni uko yakwisuzuma mu murimo we ubwe, kuko ari bwo azabona icyo yīrāta ku bwe wenyine, atari ku bwa mugenzi we.” Umwana aba akeneye guterwa inkunga, cyane cyane mu mihati aba akora mu mizo ya mbere. Niba icyo yakoze ari cyiza ugereranyije n’imyaka ye, bimushimire! Niba atari cyiza, umushimire nibura umuhati we maze umutere inkunga yo kongera kugerageza. Ibyo ari byo byose, no kugenda nta bwo byahise biziraho.
NI GUTE NASOBANURA IBIHERERANYE N’IGITSINA?
16. Dukurikije ibyo Bibiliya ivuga, ni ibisubizo bwoko ki byatangwa ku bibazo by’umwana bihereranye n’igitsina?
16 Usubiza ibibazo by’umwana wawe kandi ukamutera inkunga yo kuganira. Ariko, ashobora noneho gusa n’ugutunguye cyane akakubaza ibibazo bihereranye n’igitsina. Mbese, wamusubizanya ubushizi bw’amanga, cyangwa watangira kumubeshya uvuga wenda ko gasaza ke gato cyangwa gashiki ke wagakuye ku bitaro? Mbese, watanga ubusobanuro nyakuri, cyangwa wareka umwana wawe akazahabwa ibisubizo bidafashije, ndetse by’ibinyoma, abihawe wenda mu buryo bw’ubushizi bw’isoni n’abandi bana bagenzi be bamuruta? Bibiliya ivuga yeruye ibintu byinshi bihereranye n’igitsina cyangwa imyanya ndangagitsina (Itangiriro 17:11; 18:11; 30:16, 17; Abalewi 15:2). Ubwo yahaga ubwoko bwayo amabwiriza ahereranye no guteranira ahantu Ijambo ryayo ryagombaga kuba ririmo risomerwa, Imana yagize iti “uzajye uteranya abantu, abagabo n’abagore n’abana bato . . . kugira ngo bayumve bayige” (Gutegeka 31:12). Bityo rero, abana bato bagombaga kujya bumva bene ayo magambo mu buryo bwiza kandi bwiyubashye, atari “mu mvugo yo mu muhanda.”
17-19. Ni gute ubusobanuro buhereranye n’igitsina bwajya butangwa buhoro buhoro?
17 Mu by’ukuri gusobanura ibihereranye n’igitsina ntibyagombye gukomera nk’uko ababyeyi benshi babitekereza. Abana bamenya umubiri wabo mbere y’igihe cyane, bakagenda bavumbura imyanya inyuranye iwugize. Ushobora kubwira umwana iyo myanya y’umuburi we uti intoki, ibirenge, izuru, igifu, ikibuno, imboro, igituba. Umwana muto nta cyo biba bimubwiye, keretse iyo uhise uhindura imyifatire maze ugatangira kurya amagambo nk’iyo ugeze ku myanya ndangagitsina. Igitera ababyeyi ubwoba ni uko batekereza ko bagomba gusobanura buri kantu kose iyo ibibazo byatangiye. Mu by’ukuri, ibibazo biza buhoro buhoro uko umwana agenda agera mu ngero zitandukanye z’imikurire ye. Ukurikije ikigero agezemo, ushobora kujya umubwira gusa mu magambo make cyane akwiriye gukoreshwa, ukayasobanura mu buryo butarambuye.
18 Urugero, umunsi umwe ashobora nko kukubaza ati ‘mbese, impinja ziva hehe?’ Ushobora kumusubiza mu buryo bworoheje cyane ugira wenda uti ‘zikurira mu nda ya ba nyina.’ Akenshi ibyo ni byo biba bikenewe gusa icyo gihe. Nyuma y’aho umwana wawe ashobora kuzakubaza ati ‘uruhinja rusohoka mu nda rute?’ Ushobora wenda kuvuga uti ‘hari umuryango wihariye asohokeramo.’ Kandi incuro nyinshi ibyo biramunyura.
19 Nyuma y’aho gato hashobora kuzamuka bene iki kibazo ngo ‘uruhinja rutangira kubaho rute?’ Ushobora wenda gusubiza uti ‘bitangira iyo umubyeyi umwe w’umugabo n’uw’umugore bifuje kubona umwana. Imbuto ivuye kuri se ihura n’igi riba mu nda ya nyina maze uruhinja rugatangira gukura, mbese kimwe n’uko imbuto iri mu butaka ikura maze ikazavamo ururabo cyangwa igiti.’ Urumva rero ko ari inkuru ikomeza, buri gace kaba gahagije mu kunyura umwana mu gihe aba agize icyo abaza. Nyuma y’aho umwana ashobora kuzabaza ati ‘ni gute imbuto ya se w’umwana ijya mu nda ya nyina w’umwana?’ Ushobora wenda kuvuga gusa uti ‘uzi uko umwana w’umuhungu ateye. Afite imboro. Umukobwa afite ahantu hafunguye mu mubiri we ku buryo iyo mboro ishobora kujyamo. Uko ni ko iyo mbuto iterwa rero. Uko ni ko abantu baremwe ku buryo impinja zishobora gutangira gukurira mu nda ya ba nyina, maze amaherezo zikazasohokamo.’
20. Ni kuki ari byiza ko ababyeyi baba ari bo baha abana babo ubusobanuro buhereranye n’igitsina?
20 Nta gushidikanya ko ubwo buryo bwo gufata ibintu uko biri gutyo nta buryarya buruta inkuru z’ibinyoma cyangwa gusa n’urya indimi ku buryo uwo mwanya w’umubiri wabonwa nk’aho ari ikintu giteye ishozi. (Gereranya na Tito 1:15.) Ni byiza kandi ko umwana abwirwa ibyo bintu n’ababyeyi be, kuko bashobora kongera kuri ubwo busobanuro batanze impamvu bikwiriye ko abana bagombye kuvuka gusa ku bantu bashakanye bakundana kandi biyemeje inshingano yo gukunda no kwita kuri urwo ruhinja. Ibyo bituma abana bafata ibyo biganiro mu buryo bwiza kandi bw’umwuka, aho kubibwirwa mu buryo butuma babifata nk’aho ari ibintu byanduye.
GUTANGA AMASOMO Y’INGENZI CYANE MU BUZIMA
21. Ni iyihe kamere y’abana ituma biba ngombwa ko ababyeyi baha urubyaro rwabo urugero rwiza?
21 Igihe kimwe, Yesu yagereranije abantu bo mu gihe cye n’“abana bato bicaye mu maguriro, bahamagara bagenzi babo bati ‘Twabavugirije imyironge, ntimwabyina: twaboroze, ntimwarira’” (Matayo 11:16, 17). Imikino y’abana yari igizwe no kwigana abantu bakuru mu bihereranye n’ibirori byabo hamwe n’imihango yo guhamba. Kubera ko kwigana biri mu bigize kamere y’umwana, urugero rw’ababyeyi rugira uruhare rukomeye mu burere bwe.
22. Ni iyihe ngaruka imyifatire y’ababyeyi ishobora kugira ku bana babo?
22 Kuva umwana akivuka, akwigiraho—atari gusa mu byo uvuga, ahubwo n’uburyo ubivuga, ukuntu ijwi ukoresha uvuga riba rimeze: nko mu gihe uvugisha umwana ubwe, uwo mwashakanye cyangwa se abandi bantu. Akurikiranira hafi uko ababyeyi be bashyikirana hagati yabo, uko bashyikirana n’abandi bagize umuryango cyangwa se n’abashyitsi. Urugero utanga muri ibyo bintu rushobora gutangira guha umwana wawe amasomo y’ingenzi cyane kurusha uko yiga kugenda cyangwa kubara cyangwa gusoma inyuguti ABC. Bishobora kumushyiriraho urufatiro rw’ubumenyi no gusobanukirwa bitera umunezero nyakuri mu buzima. Urwo rugero rushobora gutuma umwana akomeza amahame akiranuka n’igihe ageze mu kigero cyo kwigishwa mu mvugo no mu gusoma.
23, 24. Niba ababyeyi bashaka ko abana babo bubahiriza amahame runaka, ni iki bagombye kwemera gukora na bo ubwabo?
23 Intumwa itera Abakristo inkunga muri aya magambo ngo “mwigane Imana, nk’abana bakundwa. Kandi mugendere mu rukundo.” Ariko mbere y’aho, yari yerekanye icyo kwigana Imana bisaba igira iti “gusharira kose n’uburakari n’umujinya n’intonganya no gutukana hamwe n’igomwa ryose bibavemo. Mugirirane neza, mugirirane imbabazi, mubabarirane ibyaha, nk’uko Imana yabababariye muri Kristo. Nuko mwigane Imana, nk’abana bakundwa . . .” (Abefeso 4:31, 32; 5:1, 2). Niba amajwi umwana yumva, cyangwa ibikorwa umwana abona bitanga amasomo y’uburakari, nko gusakuza, kwitotomba, kwikakaza cyangwa kurakara uw’imbogo, bishobora kumugiraho ingaruka zitoroshye guhanagura. Nimugirira abantu bose neza kandi mukabitaho, niba amahame agenga imyifatire yanyu ari ayo mu rwego rwo hejuru kandi meza, ubwo umwana wanyu azajya abigana muri ibyo bintu. Ujye ukora uko wifuza ko abana bawe bakora, umere nk’uko wifuza ko bamera.
24 Ababyeyi ntibagomba kugira ubwoko bubiri bw’amahame, amwe ahereranye no kubwiriza n’andi ahereranye no gushyira ibintu mu bikorwa, amwe ahereranye n’abana babo n’andi abareba bo ubwabo. Bimaze iki se kubuza abana banyu kubeshya mu gihe namwe ubwanyu mubeshya? Mbese, niba udasohoza ibyo ubasezeranya, wategereza ko bo basohoza ibyo bagusezeranya? Niba ababyeyi batubahana hagati yabo, bategereza bate ko umwana wabo yiga kubaha? Niba nta na rimwe umwana ajya yumva se cyangwa nyina bavuga bicishije bugufi, ni gute kwicisha bugufi byaba ihame kuri we? Byaba ari akaga gakomeye umubyeyi atanze igitekerezo cy’uko buri gihe aba ari mu kuri kuko icyo gihe umwana ashobora kumva ko buri kintu cyose umubyeyi akoze kiba gikwiriye—ndetse n’iyo umubyeyi yaba agize ibyo akora birangwamo kamere yo kudatungana y’icyaha kandi akaba ari mu ikosa. Kuvuga ikintu ariko ntugikore bihuje n’aya magambo Yesu yavuze ku Bafarisayo b’indyandya ngo “ibyo bababwira byose mubikore mubiziririze, ariko imigenzo yabo mwe kuyikurikiza: kuko ibyo bavuga atari byo bakora.” Bityo rero babyeyi, niba mudashaka Udufarisayo duto mu muryango wanyu, namwe ntimukabe Abafarisayo bakuru!—Matayo 23:3.
25. Ni gute abana bagombye kwigishwa iby’urukundo?
25 Abana biga ibihereranye n’urukundo mu kureba uko rugaragazwa n’abandi, kandi biga gukunda abandi mu gihe na bo bakunzwe. Urukundo ntirushobora kugurwa. Ababyeyi bashobora guhundagaza impano ku bana babo. Icyakora, mbere na mbere urukundo ni ikintu cyo mu buryo bw’umwuka, ni ikintu kiba imbere mu mutima, ntigishobora kugurwa amafaranga, kandi nta na rimwe impano zonyine zishobora gusimbura urukundo nyakuri. Kugerageza kugura urukundo birutesha agaciro. Aho gutanga impano gusa, ugomba kwitanga wowe ubwawe, n’igihe cyawe, n’imbaraga zawe, n’urukundo rwawe. Uzagererwa mu rugero wagezemo (Luka 6:38). Nk’uko muri 1 Yohana 4:19 havuga ku bihereranye n’urukundo dufitiye Imana, “turayikunda, kuko ari yo yabanje kudukunda.”
26, 27. Ni gute abana bakwigishwa ko gutanga guhesha ibyishimo?
26 Abana bashobora kwiga ibyo gutanga mu gihe bahabwa. Bashobora gufashwa kwiga kumenya ibyishimo biboneka mu gutanga, mu gukorera abandi, mu gusangira n’abandi. Bafashe kubona ko mu gutanga hari umunezero—kuri wowe, ku bandi bana, no ku bantu bakuru. Akenshi abantu bakuru ntibakunda kwemera icyo bahawe n’abana, ibyo babiterwa n’ibitekerezo byo kwibeshya bumva ko kubareka bagahamana icyo bashakaga gutanga ari bwo buryo bwo kubagaragariza ko babakunda. Umugabo umwe yagize ati:
“Nari narafashe akamenyero ko kwanga bombo umwana yabaga ashatse kumpa. Natekerezaga ko nabaga ngize neza kwanga kumutwara icyo nari nzi neza ko akunda cyane. Ariko iyo nangaga nkamureka akazigumana zose, nabonaga atagaragaje ibyishimo nk’uko nabitekerezaga. Nyuma naje gusanga burya ko byari nko kwanga ubuntu bwe, kwanga impano ze, ni ukuvuga kumwanga we ubwe. Kuva ubwo, nagiye buri gihe nemera impano nk’izo, kugira ngo ashobore kumenya ibyishimo biva mu gutanga.”
27 Ababyeyi bo mu muryango umwe bashatse gufasha akana kabo gato k’agahungu kugira ngo kabe nk’abavugwa muri Bibiliya muri 1 Timoteyo 6:18 ngo “abanyabuntu bakunda gutanga.” Bityo iyo bajyaga aho bigira Bibiliya, bafataga amafaranga bashakaga gutangaho impano bakayaha agahungu kabo, bakakareka kakayishyirira mu gasanduku k’impano. Ibyo byagafashije gucengerwamo n’akamaro ko gushyigikira ibintu byo mu buryo bw’umwuka no kujya afasha mu byaba bikenewe bihereranye na byo.
28, 29. Ni gute abana bakwigishwa akamaro ko gusaba imbabazi nk’igihe bakosheje?
28 Mbese nk’uko abana biga gukunda no kugira ubuntu iyo bahawe inyigisho ikwiriye iherekejwe n’urugero rwiza, ni na ko biga gusaba imbabazi iyo bikwiriye. Umubyeyi umwe yagize ati “iyo nkoshereje abana banjye, mbyemerera imbere yabo. Mbabwira mu magambo make impamvu nakosheje kandi ko nanjye nemera ko ari ikosa koko. Ibyo bituma na bo biborohera kujya banyaturira amakosa yabo, kuko baba bazi ko nanjye ntatunganye kandi ko ndibubumve.” Urugero rw’ibyo rwagaragaye igihe kimwe ubwo hari umushyitsi wari wasuye umuryango umwe, maze nyir’urugo amwereka abagize uwo muryango. Dore ibyo uwo mushyitsi yaje kuvuga:
“Abari aho bose barerekanywe, maze haza n’akana k’agahungu kinjira mu cyumba kamwenyura. Se w’umwana yagize ati ‘uyu ni we w’umuhererezi wacu, uyu ufite ishati yamenetseho ibiryo.’ Kumwenyura k’umwana kwahise kuyoyoka mu maso ye maze agaragaza agahinda. Se abonye ko umwana yamwaye ku buryo yari agiye guturika ngo arire, yahise amwiyegereza cyane maze aramubwira ati ‘mbabarira, nta bwo nagombye kuba nabivuze.’ Umwana yarizeho gato, maze asohoka mu cyumba, ariko ntibyatinze agaruka amwenyura cyane kurushaho—kandi yambaye indi shati nziza itanduye.
29 Nta gushidikanya ko imirunga y’urukundo ishimangirwa n’ukwicisha bugufi nk’uko. Birumvikana ko nyuma y’aho, umubyeyi ashobora gusobanurira umwana we uburyo yajya ashyira mu gaciro mu bihereranye n’ibibazo by’ubuzima, byaba bikomeye cyangwa byoroshye. Ashobora gufasha abana be kwitoza kutaremereza utuntu tworoshye, gushobora kwiseka ubwabo kandi ntibagire ubwo batekereza ko abandi bagombye kuba batunganye kimwe n’uko na bo ubwabo batakwishimira ko hagira ubibategerezaho.
BAHE AMAHAME MEZA Y’AGACIRO
30-32. Ni kuki ari iby’ingenzi cyane ko ababyeyi batangira kare cyane mu gufasha abana babo kumenya amahame meza y’agaciro mu buzima?
30 Muri iki gihe, ababyeyi benshi bagira ingorane zo kumenya amahame meza y’agaciro akwiriye gukurikizwa mu mibereho. Ingaruka ni uko abana benshi batajya babwirwa na rimwe ibintu bafatana agaciro. Ndetse ababyeyi bamwe banashidikanya no ku burenganzira baba bafite bwo gutanga amahame agenga imyifatire y’abana. Iyo ababyeyi batabikoze rero, abandi bana bagenzi babo, abaturanyi, sinema cyangwa televiziyo ni byo bibikora. Ukudahuza ibitekerezo kw’abatari mu kigero kimwe cy’imyaka, ukwivumbagatanya k’urubyiruko, ibiyobyabwenge, imico mishya n’ihinduka mu bihereranye n’iby’ibitsina—ibyo byose bitera ababyeyi ubwoba. Ariko icyo twavuga cyo, ni uko kamere y’umwana iba yaramaze gukura mbere y’uko ibyo bibazo bitangira kuvuka mu buzima bwe.
31 Ibyagezweho n’ubushakashatsi byatangajwe n’ikinyamakuru cya siyansi muri aya magambo ngo “igice kinini cya kamere y’umuntu gishyirwaho mbere y’uko atangira ishuri. Nta gushidikanya, birazwi hose ko abana bataratangira ishuri bashukika kandi bakaba bashobora gukoreshwa icyo ari cyo cyose . . . Nyamara twavumbuye ko ibyo bahuye na byo mu bwana bwabo ku bihereranye n’imimerere y’ibintu n’ibyo babonye, akenshi bigira ingaruka y’igihe kirekire kandi idakuka ku myifatire yabo.”
32 Birashoboka ko imyifatire itari myiza yahinduka, ariko undi mushakashatsi we yaje gusobanura uko bigenda iyo bene iyo myaka y’agaciro ipfushijwe ubusa muri aya magambo ngo “umwana ashobora gukomeza gukoreshwa icyo ari cyo cyose mu myaka irindwi ya mbere, ariko uko ukomeza gutinda ni ko bikomeza kugenda biba ngombwa ko hagira ibihinduka rwose mu bimukikije—bityo rero, uko imyaka igenda isimburana akaba ari na ko n’amahirwe yo kumuhindura agenda agabanuka.”
33. Ni ayahe mahame ya ngombwa cyane kurusha ayandi abana bagombye kwigishwa?
33 Abana bato bagomba kwiga amahame menshi y’ibanze, ariko aya ngombwa cyane kurusha ayandi ni ahereranye no kumenya ikiri ukuri n’ikiri ikinyoma, igikwiriye n’ikidakwiriye. Ubwo intumwa Pawulo yandikiraga Abakristo bo muri Efeso, yabateye inkunga yo kugira ubumenyi nyakuri muri aya magambo ngo “kugira ngo tudakomeza kuba abana, duteraganwa n’umuraba, tujyanwa hirya no hino n’imiyaga yose y’imyigishirize, n’uburiganya bw’abantu, n’ubwenge bubi, n’uburyo bwinshi bwo kutuyobya; ahubwo tuvuge ukuri, turi mu rukundo, dukurire muri we muri byose; uwo ni we mutwe, ni wo Kristo” (Abefeso 4:13-15). Ababyeyi nibatinda gufasha abana bato kwihingamo ibyo gukunda ukuri no kutaryarya, gukunda igikwiriye n’icyiza, bizatuma abana babura ingabo ibakingira kwibeshya no gukosa. Imyaka ya mbere y’uko abana bajya mu ishuri ihita vuba ku buryo ababyeyi batabirabukwa. Ntuzareke iyo myaka mike ya mbere ipfa guhita gutya gusa; uzayikoreshe neza kuko ari iy’ingenzi cyane kandi ni n’imyaka yigisha, maze ubonereho kugira amahame meza y’agaciro uha abana bawe. Ubigenje utyo ushobora kuzirinda imibabaro mu myaka izakurikiraho.—Imigani 29:15, 17.
34. Ni kuki amahame meza atajegajega ari ay’ingenzi, kandi se, isoko nziza cyane ya bene ayo mahame ni iyihe?
34 Intumwa imwe yahumekewe n’Imana yanditse igira iti “ishusho y’iyi si i[ra]shira,” kandi nta gushidikanya ko ibyo ari ukuri ku bihereranye n’amahame agenga ibintu, ibyiyumvo n’imyifatire yayo (1 Abakorinto 7:31). Muri iyi si hari umutekano muke. Ababyeyi bagomba kumenya ko na bo bashobora kunanirwa kubigeraho, kuko na bo ari abantu. Niba ababyeyi bazirikana ibishobora kugwa neza abana babo, kandi bakaba rwose bashishikazwa n’umunezero wabo w’igihe kizaza, bazerekeza ibitekerezo by’abana babo ku mahame meza atajegajega. Ibyo bashobora kubigeraho mu gushimangira mu bana babo, kuva mu bwana bwabo, igitekerezo cy’uko ikibazo icyo ari cyo cyose cyavuka, ikibazo icyo ari cyo cyose cyaba gikeneye igisubizo, gishobora kubonerwa igisubizo kidakuka kandi cyabafasha cyane mu Ijambo ryanditswe n’Imana ari ryo Bibiliya. Uko ibihe byaba bimeze kose ku buryo rimwe na rimwe byatuma ubuzima busa n’aho buteye urujijo cyangwa bwijimye, iryo Jambo rizakomeza kuba ‘itabaza ry’ibirenge byabo, n’umucyo umurikira inzira yabo.’—Zaburi 119:105.
35. Kurera abana bawe ni iby’ingenzi mu rugero rungana iki?
35 Ni byo koko, iki ni cyo gihe gifite agaciro nk’aka zahabu cyo gutangira guhinga mu bana bawe amahame meza y’agaciro ashobora kuzabakomeza mu buzima bwabo bwose. Nta mwuga ukomeye, nta kazi k’ingenzi kurusha kurera abana bawe. Igihe cyo gutangira ni kare cyane bakivuka, mu buto bwabo!
[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 117]
Kora ku buryo kwiga biba ibintu bishimishije