OL YANGFALA OLI ASKEM
?Olsem Wanem Blong Winim Fasin Blong Sem?
Rabis nius se: Fasin blong sem i save blokem yu blong gat ol gudfala fren mo ekspiriensem ol gudfala samting long laef.
Gud nius se: I no oltaem we fasin blong sem i nogud. Fasin ya i save halpem yu blong tingting gud bifo we yu toktok, skelem gud ol samting, mo lesin gud.
Nius we i gud moa se: Fasin blong sem i no wan fasin we bambae i stap olwe, taswe yu save kontrolem. Atikol ya bambae i halpem yu blong mekem olsem.
Tingting gud long ol samting we oli mekem yu yu fraet
Sem i save mekem se yu fraet blong toktok long ol man. From samting ya, yu no gat ol fren mo yu stap yu wan, i olsem se yu stap long wan rum we i tudak. I had taem i olsem. Be sipos yu tingting gud long ol samting we oli mekem yu yu fraet, bambae yu luksave se yu no nid blong fraet. Bambae yumi tokbaot tri eksampol.
Fraet 1: “Mi no save se bae mi tokbaot wanem.”
Trutok: Ol man oli no tingbaot tumas ol samting we yu talem, be oli tingbaot moa se yu mekem oli harem olsem wanem. Yu save kontrolem fraet blong yu sipos yu kamgud long fasin blong lesin gud, mo soem se yu intres long ol samting we narafala oli talem.
Samting blong tingbaot: ?Yu laekem moa wanem kaen fren, wan fren we i toktok tumas o wan we i lesin gud?
Fraet 2: “Bambae oli ting se mi boring.”
Trutok: Ol man bambae oli gat defdefren tingting long yu, nating se yu sem o nogat. Yu save kontrolem fraet blong yu mo givhan long ol narafala blong oli gat gudfala tingting long yu, sipos yu soemaot prapa fasin blong yu.
Samting blong tingbaot: I nogud yu ting se ol narafala oli stap jajem yu, from we taem yu gat nogud tingting long olgeta, maet yu nao yu stap jajem olgeta long fasin we i no stret.
Fraet 3: “Bambae mi sem sipos mi talem wan samting we i rong.”
Trutok: Wanwan taem, samting ya i hapen long evriwan. Taem yu mestem, yu tingbaot se hemia i soemaot nomo se yu no stretgud olgeta. Samting ya bambae i givhan long yu blong no fraet.
Samting blong tingbaot: ?Yu yu glad blong stap wetem ol man we oli soemaot se olgeta tu oli no stret gud olgeta?
?Yu yu save? Samfala oli ting se oli no sem from we oli sanem plante teks mesej. Be i moa isi blong faenem ol gudfala fren, taem yu storian stret wetem ol narafala. Sherry Turkle, wan woman we i stadi long tingting blong man mo long teknoloji, i raetem se: “Bambae yumi kaen moa long ol narafala, sipos yumi luk fes blong olgeta stret, mo yumi harem voes blong olgeta.”a
Sipos yu kontrolem fraet blong yu, bambae i isi moa blong storian wetem ol man
Samting we yu save mekem
No skelem yu wetem narafala. Yu no nid blong toktok plante, be mak blong yu i blong kontrolem sem nomo. Olsem nao, bambae yu no mestem janis ya blong gat ol gudfala fren mo ekspiriensem ol gudfala samting long laef.
“Yu no nid blong mekem wan longfala storian, o traem pulum ol narafala blong lukluk yu. Yu jes nid blong talem nem blong yu long wan man mo askem sam isi kwestin long hem.”—Alicia.
Rul blong Baebol: “I gud man i jekem wok we hem nomo i mekem, blong faenemaot se wok ya i olsem wanem. Olsem nao, hem i save glad from wok we hem nomo i mekem, be i no from we hem i skelem wok blong hem wetem wok blong narafala.”—Galesia 6:4.
Lukluk ol narafala. Wajem olgeta we oli laekem blong storian, mo makem olsem wanem oli storian wetem ol narafala. ?Wanem i mekem se oli gat gudhan blong storian? ?Wanem ol fasin we oli no wok gud? ?Wanem fasin we yu wantem folem?
“Lukluk mo lanem samting long olgeta we oli no faenem i had blong fren wetem ol narafala. Makem samting we oli mekem mo talem, taem oli mitim wan man.”—Aaron.
Rul blong Baebol: “Wan man i save sapenem fren blong hem, olsem we aean i sapenem aean bakegen.”—Ol Proveb 27:17.
Askem kwestin. Ol man oli laekem blong talemaot tingting blong olgeta long ol samting, taswe wan gudfala rod blong statem storian hemia blong askem kwestin. Fasin ya i mekem se man i tingbaot storian blong yutufala, i bitim we i lukluk yu.
“Taem yu rere gud fastaem bae yu no wari tumas. Bifo we yu go joen wetem wan grup, i gud yu tingbaot sam topik o kwestin blong tokbaot, nao bambae i isi moa blong statem wan storian.”—Alana.
Rul blong Baebol: “Yufala i no mas tingbaot yufala nomo, be yufala i mas tingbaot ol narafala man tu.”—Filipae 2:4.
a I kamaot long buk ya Reclaiming Conversation.