Ungenzani Ukuze Ube Ngubaba Omuhle?

Okusesihlokweni lesi

• Ngowani umsebenzi kababa?

• Kungani ubaba eqakathekile?

• Obaba lamadodakazi abo

• Okunganceda obaba

Ngowani umsebenzi kababa?

• Nxa umntanakho engakazalwa. Okwenzayo khathesi ungakabi ngubaba kutshengisa ozakwenza nxa usungubaba. Ibhuku elithi Do Fathers Matter? lithi:

  “Indoda encedisa umkayo nxa ezithwele ngokumthengela izinto ezifunakalayo, ukumhambisa kudokotela lokuyabona usana ku-scan, iyabe itshengisa ukuthi izamnakekela kuhle umkayo nxa esebelethile iphinde inakekele losana.”

  “Ngangisenza konke okusemandleni ami ukuze ngincedise umkami ezithwele ngoba ngangingafuni ukuthi acabange ukuthi uyedwa. Salungisa indlu yomntwana sisonke futhi sasikulindele ngabomvu ukumbona.”—UJames.

  Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Lingaqakathekisi lokho okufunwa yini kuphela kodwa liqakathekise lalokho okufunwa ngabanye.”—KwabaseFiliphi 2:4.

• Nxa umntanakho esezelwe. Nxa ungazinika isikhathi sokuphatha umntanakho lesokudlala laye eseselusana lizazwanana kakhulu. Ncedisa ekumnakekeleni. Nxa ungakwenza lokhu umntanakho uzakhula kuhle futhi uzazibonela ukuthi uligugu kakhulu kuwe.

  “Zinike isikhathi sokudlala lomntanakho. Ukhumbule ukuthi nguwe umuntu wokuqala ozamenza abone ukuthi ukuthandwa kutshoni.”—URichard.

  

  Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Abantwana balilifa elivela kuJehova, bangumvuzo ovela kuye.”—IHubo 127:3.

• Nxa umntanakho ekhula. Ukuchwayisisa kutshengisa ukuthi abantwana abajayelane laboyise benza kuhle esikolo, baphilisana kuhle labanye njalo kukalutshwane ukuthi basebenzise ama-drugs kumbe babe yizigebenga. Ngakho zama ngamandla wonke ukuth lijayelane lomntanakho.

  “Indodana yethu yathi isithutha yangitshela ukuthi izazikhumbula kakhulu izingxoxo esasisiba lazo nxa sisemangweni kumbe nxa sisidla ukudla kwantambama. Ezinye ingxoxo zakhona zaziphonguqalisa nje ngingalindelanga ngenxa yokuthi sasisiba lesikhathi esinengi sindawonye.”—UDennis.

  

  Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Nanzelelani lingenzi njengabantu abangahlakaniphanga kodwa yenzani njengabahlakaniphileyo, lisisebenzise kuhle isikhathi senu.”—Kwabase-Efesu 5:15, 16.

Kungani ubaba eqakathekile?

Abantu abanengi bathi umsebenzi wabobaba ngowokunakekela lokuvikela izimuli zabo, ikanti owabomama ngowokuba seduze labantwababo bazwelane labo. (UDutheronomi 1:31; U-Isaya 49:15) Kwezinye imuli obaba benza imisebenzi eyenziwa ngomama. Omama labo benza imisebenzi eyenziwa ngobaba. Lanxa kunjalo, abachwayisisayo bathi bobabili abazali balengxenye eqakatheke kakhulu ekukhuliseni abantwana.a

Omunye ochwayisisa ngempilo yemuli okuthiwa nguJudith Wallerstein usitshela ngokunye okwake kwenzakala kuye okutshengisa ukuthi ubaba lomama baqakathekile sibili. Wabhala wathi: “Indodakazi yami yake yatshaywa yimota ileminyaka engu-12. Ngelanga eyatshaywa ngalo, yayifuna ukuthi uyise kube nguye ongena layo e-ambulensini ngoba yayimthemba ukuthi uzamvikela. Kodwa yathi isifikile esibhedlela yayifuna kube yimi engihlala eceleni kombheda wayo ngiyiduduze.”b

“Ubaba angenelisa ukuncedisa imuli yakhe ukuthi izizwe ivikelekile kodwa kungaba nzima ukuthi umama akwenze lokhu nxa eyedwa. Umama yena uyenelisa ukuncedisa abantwabakhe ukuthi bazizwe bethandwa lokubazwisisa ngoba uyabe ebalalela ngesineke. Bobabili bayancedisana ekukhuliseni abantwana.”—UDaniel.

Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Ndodana yami lalela nxa uyihlo ekulaya, ungakulahli okufundiswa ngunyoko.”—IZaga 1:8.

Obaba lamadodakazi abo

Indlela ubaba aphatha ngayo indodakazi yakhe yiyo ezatshengisa ukuthi abantu besilisa kumele bayiphathe njani. Nanzi indlela ezimbili indodakazi engakubona ngayo lokhu:

• Ngokukhangela indlela ophatha ngayo unina. Nxa ungathanda umkakho futhi umhloniphe, indodakazi yakho izabona ukuthi kumele idinge ubuntu obunjani emuntwini ezatshada laye nxa isikhulile.—1 UPhetro 3:7.

  

• Ngokukhangela indlela oyiphatha ngayo. Nxa ungayiphatha ngenhlonipho indodakazi yakho izafunda ukuzihlonipha layo. Izafunda lokuthi abanye abantu besilisa kumele bayiphathe njani.

  Kodwa nxa ungahlala uyichothoza indodakazi yakho izazibona ingasimuntu walutho njalo izacina isiyadinga ukuthandwa ngabanye abantu besilisa abangelandaba layo.

  “Akujayelekanga ukuthi indodakazi ezizwa ithandwa futhi ivikelwa nguyise ithandane lomuntu ongelabuntu obuhle.”—UWayne.