HELP FOR FAMILI | LUKAFTAREM PIKININI
If Teenager blo Iu Duim Samting wea Mekem Iu No Trustim Hem
Samfala teenager ignorem curfew wea parents putim for olketa. Others trikim parents blo olketa, maet olketa laea lo parents or sneak aot from haos for go witim frens blo olketa. Wat nao iu savve duim if teenager blo iu duim samting wea mekem iu no trustim hem?
Hao, teenager blo mi hem wanfala rebel?
Not really. Bible sei: “Karangge tingting hem stap lo heart blo wanfala smol pikinini,” and staka taem wat olketa teenager duim showim datfala toktok hem tru. (Proverbs 22:15, footnote) “Samfala disison wea olketa teenager mekem, olketa no tingting gud abaotem firstaem and hem foolish disison,” hem nao wat Dr. Laurence Steinberg raetem lo buk blo hem. “So iumi expectim bae olketa mekem samfala mistek.”a
Hao if teenager blo mi hem laea lo mi?
No tingse main aim blo teenager blo iu hem for rebel againstim iu. Olketa wea duim research faendaot dat olketa teenager really kea abaotem hao parents ting lo olketa, even if olketa no talem datwan. Nomata teenager blo iu no showim dat hem really kea, maet hem no hapi lo hemseleva, and feel nogud tumas bikos hem mekem iu for feel disappointed lo hem.
Wanfala bon wea brek, taem hem heal, hem savve strong bak. Lo sem wei tu, iu savve gainim bak trust blo teenager blo iu
Hu nao shud kasem blame?
Hao, hem environment blo hem? Bible sei: “Sapos man hem fren witim pipol wea wei bilong olketa hem nogud, olketa bae spoelem gudfala wei bilong hem.” (1 Corinth 15:33) Tru nao, frens blo olketa teenager savve barava influencim olketa. And other tings tu olsem, social media and olketa advertisement. Nara samting, olketa teenager no garem experience lo laef, dastawe olketa savve mekem olketa disison wea no wise. Olketa mas lane for acceptim consequences lo disison blo olketa, bikos datwan bae helpem olketa for kamap responsible adults lo future.
Hao, hem fault blo mi? Maet iu wonder if iu strict tumas dastawe teenager blo iu hem disobey. Or samtaems iu maet wonder if iu no strict inaf and iu givim tumas freedom lo teenager blo iu. Instead for focus lo wat iu duim wea maet contribute lo disfala problem, hem gud for focus lo wat iu savve duim for helpem hem.
Hao nao mi savve helpem teenager blo mi mekem mi savve trustim hem moa?
Kontrolem reaction blo iu. Maet teenager blo iu expectim iu for kros. Hao if iu duim opposite samting? Story gud lo hem abaotem wat nao lead go lo problem. Hao, hem curious? Boring? Lonely? Laek for garem olketa frens? No eniwan lo olketa reason hia hem gud excuse for wat hem duim, bat taem iu savve lo reason bihaenem datwan, bae datwan helpem iu and teenager blo iu for minim wat nao kosim problem.
Bible principle: “Mas willing for lisin, no kwiktaem for toktok, and no kwiktaem for kros.”—James 1:19.
Helpem teenager blo iu for luksavve why datwan happen. Askem olketa kwestin olsem, Wat nao iu lanem from samting wea happen? If sem situation kamap moa, wat nao bae iu duim wea difren from wat iu duim distaem? Kaen kwestin olsem bae helpem teenager blo iu for garem skills for ting raonem samting.
Bible principle: “Stretem olketa . . . warnim olketa, and encouragem olketa. Taem iu duim diswan, iu mas barava patient and teach long gudfala wei.”—2 Timothy 4:2.
Helpem hem for luksavve lo consequences lo akson blo hem. Datwan bae helpem olketa for lane from wat olketa duim. For example, if teenager blo iu tekem car without permission blo iu, iu savve putim restriction for hem no draevem car for lelebet taem wea iu markem.
Bible principle: “Eni samting wea hem plantim, datwan nao bae hem harvestim.”—Galatia 6:7.
Focus lo hao for gainim bak trust. Diswan bae no happen automatic. Nomata olsem, teenager blo iu shud savve dat isisi hem savve gainim bak trust blo iu. Mek sure hem luksavve dat hope hem stap. If teenager blo iu feel dat bae hem never gainim bak trust blo iu, maet hem bae laek givap.
Bible principle: “No mekem olketa pikinini bilong iufala for kros, nogud nao olketa wikdaon.”—Colossae 3:21.
a From buk You and Your Adolescent.