IGICE CYA 2

Kuki duhora dutongana?

Mu nkuru ibimburira iki gice, hari ibintu bitatu Rachel yakoze byatumye habaho intonganya. Ese ushobora kubivuga? Andika ibisubizo byawe hasi aha, hanyuma uze kubigereranya n’ibiboneka mu gasanduku kanditseho ngo “Ibisubizo” kari ku ipaji ya 20.

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Ni kuwa gatatu nimugoroba. Rachel, ufite imyaka 17, arangije imirimo yo mu rugo yakoraga, yiteguye gufata akaruhuko kuko yumva yakoze ibyo yagombaga gukora byose. Acanye televiziyo, ahita yicara mu ntebe akunda kwicaramo.

Ako kanya nyina ahise aza, kandi biragaragara ko atishimye. “Rachel! Nta soni urata umwanya ureba televiziyo, aho wagiye gufasha murumuna wawe gukora umukoro yahawe ku ishuri? Kandi nta na rimwe ujya ukora ibyo wabwiwe!”

Rachel avugiye mu matamatama, ariko ku buryo nyina yumva: “ubwo uratangiye!”

Nyina abaye nk’uwunama gato ati “uvuze ngo iki muko?”

Rachel ashuhuje umutima, amurebana agasuzuguro aravuga ati “hari icyo mvuze!”

Nyina ararakaye cyane, aravuga ati “ntukambwire utyo!”

Rachel nawe ahise amusubiza ati “wowe se kuki umbwiye utyo?”

Ibyari ikiruhuko birarangiye, intonganya ziratangiye.

ESE ibintu nk’ibyo byigeze bikubaho? Ese uhora utongana n’ababyeyi bawe? Niba ari uko bimeze, fata akanya ubitekerezeho. Ni izihe mpamvu zikunze gutuma mutongana? Shyira aka kamenyetso ✔ mu gasanduku gahuje n’iyo mpamvu. Cyangwa se niba hari impamvu itari muri izi, uyuzuze ahanditse ngo “Ibindi.”

□ Imyitwarire

□ Imirimo yo mu rugo

□ Imyambarire

□ Amasaha yo gutaha

□ Imyidagaduro

□ Incuti

□ Abo tudahuje igitsina

□ Ibindi ․․․․․

Icyo mwaba mupfa cyose, iyo umaze gutongana n’ababyeyi bawe, mwese musigara mwumva mubabaye. Ni koko, ubishatse waruca ukarumira, ugasa n’aho wemera ibyo ababyeyi bawe bavuga byose. Ariko se, ibyo ni byo Imana iba ikwitezeho? Oya. Bibiliya igusaba ‘kubaha so na nyoko’ (Abefeso 6:2, 3). Ariko nanone, igutera inkunga yo kugira “ubushobozi bwo kwiyumvisha ibintu” no gukoresha ‘ubushobozi bwawe bwo gutekereza’ (Imigani 1:1-4; Abaroma 12:1). Ibyo nubikora, nta kabuza uzagira ibitekerezo bihamye, rimwe na rimwe bishobora no kuba binyuranye n’iby’ababyeyi bawe. Icyakora, mu miryango ishyira mu bikorwa amahame yo muri Bibiliya, ababyeyi n’abana babo bashobora kuganira mu mahoro, nubwo baba batabona ibintu kimwe.—Abakolosayi 3:13.

Wabigenza ute kugira ngo uvuge ibikuri ku mutima, ariko udatumye ikiganiro gihinduka intambara y’amagambo? Biroroshye kuvuga uti “ababyeyi banjye ni bo bafite ikibazo. None se si bo bahora bangendaho!” Ariko fata akanya utekereze: ese hari ubushobozi ufite bwo kugira icyo uhindura ku myifatire y’abandi, ndetse n’iy’ababyeyi bawe? Mu by’ukuri, umuntu ushobora kugira icyo uhinduraho, ni wowe ubwawe gusa. Icyiza ni uko nuramuka ugabanyije amarere, ababyeyi bawe na bo bazarushaho gutuza kandi bakagutega amatwi igihe ufite icyo ushaka kubabwira.

Noneho reka turebe icyo wakora kugira ngo uhoshe izo ntonganya. Nushyira mu bikorwa izi nama zikurikira, ababyeyi bawe bazatangazwa n’uburyo usigaye uzi kuganira, kandi nawe ubwawe bizagutangaza.

● Jya utekereza mbere yo gusubiza. Ntugahubuke ngo upfe kuvuga ikikujemo cyose, igihe wumva ko ababyeyi bawe bakwibasiye. Urugero, mama wawe ashobora kukubaza ati “kuki utogeje ibyombo? Kandi nta na rimwe ujya ukora ibyo bakubwiye!” Ushobora kuvuga utabanje gutekereza, uti “ariko kuki umpoza ku rutoto?” Banza ukoreshe ubushobozi bwawe bwo gutekereza. Gerageza kumenya igitumye mama wawe akubwira atyo. Ubusanzwe, ntiwagombye kumva ko amagambo nk’aya ngo “buri gihe,” cyangwa ngo “nta na rimwe,” ari icyo asobanura byanze bikunze. Ahubwo aba agaragaza ibyiyumvo nyir’ukuyavuga afite. Ni iki kiba kibimuteye?

Birashoboka ko mama wawe yaba arakaye, yumva ko wamutereranye ukamuharira imirimo myinshi yo mu rugo. Birashoboka ko icyo yifuza gusa ari ukumenya ko witeguye kumufasha. Uko byaba bimeze kose, kumubwira ngo aguhoza ku rutoto nta cyo byakugezaho, keretse ku ntonganya gusa! Aho kubigenza utyo se, kuki utatuma mama wawe acururuka? Urugero, ushobora kumubwira uti “mama, ndabona ubabaye rwose. Humura ngiye guhita noza ibyombo.” Icyitonderwa: ujye wirinda kuvugana agasuzuguro. Nusubiza ugaragaza ko umwitayeho, azarushaho gucururuka, akubwire ikibazo nyacyo gihari.a

Andika hasi aha amagambo papa wawe cyangwa mama wawe yakubwira akaba yakurakaza.

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Noneho tekereza igisubizo waha umubyeyi wawe ugaragaza ko umwitayeho, gishobora kumwereka ko usobanukiwe impamvu yavuze ayo magambo.

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● Jya uvuga wubashye. Michelle ahereye ku byamubayeho, yiboneye agaciro ko kuzirikana amagambo akoresha avugana na mama we. We arivugira ati “ikibazo twaba tujyaho impaka cyose, buri gihe bijya kurangira mama atishimiye uko musubiza.” Niba ibyo bikunze kukubaho, itoze kuvuga buhoro kandi witonze. Wirinde kurebana agasuzuguro cyangwa kugira ikindi kintu ukora utavuze cyagaragaza ko utishimiye ibyo bakubwiye (Imigani 30:17). Niba wumva kwifata bigiye kukunanira, vuga bucece isengesho rigufi (Nehemiya 2:4). Icyo ugamije si ukugira ngo Imana igufashe ‘ababyeyi bawe bareke kukugendaho,’ ahubwo ni ukugira ngo ubashe kwifata, utaza gukoza agati mu ntozi.—Yakobo 1:26.

Andika mu mwanya uri hasi aha ibyo ukwiriye kwirinda, byaba amagambo ukunda kuvuga cyangwa ibyo ukora utavuze igihe usubiza mama wawe.

Amagambo uvuga:

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Ibyo ukora utavuze (ibimenyetso by’umubiri n’icyo mu maso hagaragaza):

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● Jya utega amatwi. Bibiliya igira iti “amagambo menshi ntaburamo ibicumuro” (Imigani 10:19). Ujye uha papa wawe na mama wawe umwanya wo kugira icyo bakubwira, kandi ubatege amatwi witonze. Ntukabace mu ijambo ushaka kwisobanura. Wowe ujye utega amatwi gusa. Nibamara kuvuga, nawe uzabona umwanya uhagije wo kubaza ibibazo no kwisobanura. Ariko uramutse ukomeje guhatiriza ushaka byanze bikunze kuvuga ibyo utekereza, ushobora gutuma birushaho kuba bibi. Niba hari n’ibindi wifuzaga kuvuga, birashoboka ko icyo gihe cyaba ari “igihe cyo guceceka.”—Umubwiriza 3:7.

● Ujye uba witeguye gusaba imbabazi. Buri gihe biba byiza gusaba imbabazi ku kintu icyo ari cyo cyose wakoze cyabaye intandaro y’intonganya (Abaroma 14:19). Ushobora no gusaba imbabazi bitewe no kuba byonyine habayeho intonganya. Niba ubona ko kubivuga bikugoye, gerageza kwandika uko wumva umerewe. Hanyuma uhindure imyifatire yawe yatumye mutongana, bityo uzabe nk’‘ugenze ikirometero cya kabiri’ (Matayo 5:41). Urugero, niba mwatonganye bitewe n’uko hari umurimo wo mu rugo utakoze, kuki utatungura ababyeyi bawe ugakora uwo murimo? Nubwo uwo murimo waba utawukunda, ese ibyaba byiza si ukuwukora aho kugira ngo ababyeyi bawe baguhane nibabona utawukoze (Matayo 21:28-31)? Tekereza ibyiza uzabona nukora ibikureba, kugira ngo uhoshe amakimbirane ari hagati yawe n’ababyeyi bawe.

Mu muryango urimo abantu babanye neza, na ho ntihabura amakimbirane; ariko baba bazi uko bayakemura mu mahoro. Nugerageza gushyira mu bikorwa inama zatanzwe muri iki gice, uzabona ko ushobora kuganira n’ababyeyi bawe mudatonganye, ndetse mukaganira no ku ngingo zikomeye.

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]

UMURONGO W’IFATIZO

“Umutima w’umukiranutsi uratekereza mbere yo gusubiza.”—Imigani 15:28.

INAMA

Niba ababyeyi bawe bakuvugishije, reka kumva umuzika, ube ubitse ibitabo wasomaga kandi ujye ubareba mu gihe bakubwira.

ESE WARI UBIZI . . . ?

Guhosha intonganya cyangwa kuzirinda bizatuma urushaho kumererwa neza. Ni yo mpamvu Bibiliya ivuga ko umuntu “ugaragaza ineza yuje urukundo aba agirira neza ubugingo bwe.”​—Imigani 11:17.

ICYO NIYEMEJE GUKORA

Dore inama yatanzwe muri iki gice nkwiriye gukurikiza kurusha izindi: ․․․․․

Niyemeje gutangira gukurikiza iyi nama bitarenze ku itariki ya ․․․․․

Icyo nifuza kubaza ababyeyi banjye kuri iyi ngingo ni iki: ․․․․․

UBITEKEREZAHO IKI?

● Kuki bamwe mu rungano rwawe bumva ko kumenya gutongana ari ishema?

● Kuki Yehova Imana abona ko umuntu ukunda intonganya ameze nk’umupfapfa?—Imigani 20:3.

● Kureka gutongana n’ababyeyi bawe bizakugirira akahe kamaro?

[Amagambo yatsindagirijwe yo ku ipaji ya 18]

“Mama ajya ambwira ati ‘mbabarira’ akanampobera, kandi rwose biranshimisha. Bituma twibagirwa ibyabaye. Njya ngerageza kumwigana. Kureka ubwibone bwanjye nkavuga mbikuye ku mutima nti ‘mbabarira,’ biramfasha cyane, ariko ni ukuri ntibyoroshye.’’​—Lauren

[Agasanduku ko ku ipaji ya 20]

Ibisubizo

1. Gukoresha amagambo agaragaza agasuzuguro (“ubwo uratangiye!”), nta kindi byamarira Rachel uretse gutuma mama we arushaho kurakara.

2. Kuba Rachel yararebanye agasuzuguro byasembuye mama we.

3. Gusubizanya agasuzuguro (“wowe se kuki umbwiye utyo?”) buri gihe bituma ibintu birushaho kuzamba.

[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 19]

Gutongana n’umubyeyi wawe ni kimwe no kwiruka kuri iki cyuma bakoreraho siporo: uzatakaza imbaraga nyinshi nyamara nta cyo uzageraho