Babyeyi—Nimurinde Abana Banyu!

MU Ishuri ryisumbuye ryo muri Nijeriya, umukobwa wari uzwiho ubwiyandarike mu bihereranye n’ibitsina, yakundaga kugira bagenzi be b’abakobwa bigana inama ku byerekeranye n’ibitsina. Umwe mu miti yatangaga wo gukuramo inda, wari inzoga y’igikamba ivanze n’itabi. Inkuru ze yatoranyaga mu bitabo bivuga ibihereranye n’ibitsina mu buryo buteye isoni, zashishikazaga cyane benshi mu banyeshuri bagenzi be. Hari bamwe batangiye kujya mu busambanyi, maze umwe muri bo atwara inda. Kugira ngo akuremo inda, yanyoye ya nzoga y’igikamba ivanze n’itabi. Mu gihe cy’amasaha make, yari atangiye kuruka amaraso. Iminsi mike nyuma y’aho, yaguye mu bitaro.

Muri iyi si ya none, urubyiruko rwinshi ruhora ruvuga ibihereranye n’ibitsina, bigatuma ababyumva b’abapfu bononekara. Ni nde abakiri bato bashobora kwisunga kugira ngo babone ubumenyi nyakuri buzabarinda? Mbega ukuntu biba byiza iyo bashobora kwegera ababyeyi babo bubaha Imana, bafite inshingano yo kubarera ‘babahana [kandi] babigisha iby’Umwami wacu.’—Abefeso 6:4.

Imyifatire yo Muri Afurika ku Bihereranye n’Uburere Bwerekeranye n’Ibitsina

Mu isi hose, ababyeyi benshi babona ko bikomeye kuganira n’abana babo ibihereranye n’ibitsina. Ibyo ni ko biri muri Afurika mu buryo bwihariye. Donald, akaba ari umubyeyi w’umugabo wo muri Sierra Leone, yagize ati “ni nk’aho bitajya bikorwa. Ibyo ntibiri mu muco w’Afurika.” Umugore umwe wo muri Nijeriya witwa Confident yiyemereye agira ati “ababyeyi banjye babona igitsina nk’aho ari ikintu kidakwiriye kuvugwa ku mugaragaro; ni ikizira mu rwego rw’umuco.”

Mu mico imwe n’imwe yo muri Afurika, kuvuga amagambo ahereranye n’igitsina, urugero nk’imboro, amasohoro, cyangwa kujya mu mugongo, bifatwa nk’aho ari ugushira isoni. Umubyeyi umwe w’Umukristokazi, yageze n’aho abuza umwana we w’umukobwa gukoresha ijambo “igitsina,” n’ubwo yavuze ko uwo mwana we yashoboraga gukoresha ijambo “ubusambanyi.” Ibiri amambu, Ijambo ry’Imana, ari ryo Bibiliya, rivuga mu buryo bweruye ibihereranye n’ibitsina hamwe n’imyanya ndangagitsina (Itangiriro 17:11; 18:11; 30:16, 17; Abalewi 15:2). Intego y’iki kiganiro si iyo gukoza isoni cyangwa kubyutsa irari, ahubwo ni iyo kurinda no kwigisha ubwoko bw’Imana.​—Timoteyo 3:16.

Uretse iyo miziririzo ishingiye ku muco, indi mpamvu ituma ababyeyi bamwe na bamwe bifata, yagaragajwe n’umubyeyi w’umugabo wo muri Nijeriya, agira ati “ndamutse nganiriye n’abana banjye ku bihereranye n’ibitsina, bishobora gutuma bagwa mu cyaha cy’ubusambanyi.” Ariko se, ibisobanuro byiyubashye bishingiye kuri Bibiliya ku byerekeranye n’ibitsina, byaba bitera abana inkunga yo kubyirundumuriramo no kubigerageza? Oya rwose. Mu by’ukuri, birashoboka neza rwose ko iyo abakiri bato bafite ubumenyi buke, ari nako barushaho guhura n’akaga ko kuba bagwa mu cyaha cy’ubusambanyi. Bibiliya igira iti “ubwenge [bushingiye ku bumenyi nyakuri ni] ubwugamo.”—Umubwiriza 7:12.

Mu mugani wa Yesu, umuntu w’umunyabwenge yabonye mbere y’igihe ko mu gihe kizaza, hashoboraga kuzabaho inkubi y’umuyaga, maze yubaka inzu ye ku rutare, mu gihe umupfapfa we yubakaga inzu ye ku musenyi maze igasenyuka (Matayo 7:24-27). Mu buryo nk’ubwo, kuba ababyeyi b’Abakristo b’abanyabwenge bazi ko abana babo bazahura n’ibigeragezo byagereranywa n’inkubi y’umuyaga bibahatira kwishushanya n’iyi si yataye umuco mu bihereranye n’ibitsina, bakomeza abana babo bakoresheje ubumenyi nyakuri buzabafasha gukomeza gushikama.

Indi mpamvu ituma ababyeyi benshi bataganira n’abana babo ibihereranye n’ibitsina, yavuzwe n’umugore umwe wo muri Afurika, agira ati “igihe nari nkiri muto, ababyeyi banjye b’Abahamya ntibigeze baganira nanjye ibintu bihereranye n’ibitsina, bityo kuganira n’abana banjye ku byerekeranye n’ibyo bintu bikaba bitarigeze binza mu bitekerezo.” Ariko kandi, ibigeragezo abakiri bato bo muri iki gihe bahura na byo, ni byinshi ugereranyije n’ibyo abakiri bato bo mu myaka 10 cyangwa 20 ishize bahuraga na byo. Ibyo ntibitangaje. Ijambo ry’Imana ryahanuye ko “mu minsi y’imperuka . . . , abantu babi, n’abiyita uko batari, bazarushaho kuba babi, bayobya bakayobywa.”—2 Timoteyo 3:1, 13.

Kuri icyo kibazo, hiyongeraho no kuba abana benshi badashishikazwa no kwaturira ababyeyi babo ibibari ku mutima, cyangwa se bakaba batanabishoboye. Imishyikirano iba hagati y’ababyeyi n’abana, akenshi usanga ijegajega, ndetse no mu tuntu duto duto. Umusore ufite imyaka 19 yitotombye agira ati “singanira n’ababyeyi banjye. Nta mishyikirano myiza iri hagati yanjye na data. Ntanyitaho.”

Nanone kandi, abakiri bato bashobora gutinya ko kubaza ibibazo bihereranye n’ibitsina, byagira ingaruka mbi. Umukobwa w’imyaka 16 yagize ati “singanira n’abayeyi banjye ku bibazo bihereranye n’ibitsina, bitewe n’imyifatire bagira kuri bene ibyo bintu. Hashize igihe runaka mukuru wanjye abajije Mama ibibazo bimwe na bimwe byerekeranye n’ibitsina. Aho kugira ngo Mama amufashe ku bihereranye n’ibibazo bye, yatangiye kumukeka amababa. Incuro nyinshi, Mama yarampamagaraga kugira ngo agire icyo ambaza ku bihereranye na mukuru wanjye, rimwe na rimwe agasa n’ukemanga imyifatire ye. Kubera ko ntashaka kwiteranya na Mama, nta cyo mubwira ku byerekeranye n’ibibazo byanjye.”

Kuki Bagomba Kwigishwa?

Kwigisha abana bacu mu rugero rukwiriye ku birebana n’ibitsina, si ugukora ikintu cyiza gusa, ahubwo ni no gukora ikintu kirangwa n’ineza. Niba ababyeyi batigishije abana babo ibihereranye n’ibitsina, hari abandi bazabikora—ubusanzwe hakiri kare kuruta uko ababyeyi babiteganyaga, kandi akenshi mu buryo budahuje n’amahame ava ku Mana. Hari umukobwa w’imyaka 13 wakoze icyaha cy’ubusambanyi bitewe n’uko yari yabwiwe na mugenzi we bigana, ko niba adataye ubusugi bwe, yari kuzagira ububabare bukomeye cyane mu gihe kizaza. Yaramubwiye ati “bazakeba urutezo rwawe bakoresheje imakasi.” Mu gihe nyuma y’aho yabazwaga impamvu atabwiye nyina w’Umukristokazi ibyo yari yumvise, uwo mukobwa yasubije ko ibintu nk’ibyo bitajya biganirwaho n’abantu bakuru.

Umukobwa wo muri Nijeriya yagize ati “bagenzi banjye twigana, bagerageje kunyemeza ko ibyerekeranye n’ibitsina ari ibintu abantu bose bazima bagomba kwifatanyamo. Bambwiye ko niba muri iki gihe ntifatanyije mu bihereranye n’ibitsina, ko igihe nari kuba mfite imyaka 21, nari kuzatangira kurwara indwara yari kuzagira ingaruka mbi cyane igihe nari kuzaba ndi umugore. Ku bw’ibyo rero, kugira ngo nirinde ako kaga gakomeye, bavuze ko byari kuba byiza ngize imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo gushyingirwa.”

Kubera ko yagiranye imishyikirano myiza n’ababyeyi be, yahise abona ko ibyo byari bihabanye n’ibyo yigiraga imuhira. “Buri gihe, naratahaga maze nkabwira mama ibyo babaga bambwiye ku ishuri.” Nyina yashoboraga kunyomoza izo nkuru z’ibinyoma.—Gereranya n’Imigani 14:15.

Binyuriye mu guha abana ubumenyi bwa ngombwa bubafasha kugera ku bwenge buva ku Mana mu bihereranye n’ibitsina, ababayeyi babaha ibikenewe byose kugira ngo batahure imimerere yateza akaga, kandi ngo bamenye abantu baba bashaka kubagira ibikoresho. Bibafasha kwirinda umubabaro uterwa n’indwara zandurira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina no gutwara inda z’indaro. Bigira uruhare mu gutuma biyubaha, kandi bakubahwa n’abandi. Bibabatura ku mitekerereze ikocamye no mu mihangayiko. Bituma bagira imyifatire iboneye kandi myiza, ku bihereranye n’ibitsina, bityo bikazatuma bagira ibyishimo nyuma y’aho mu gihe bazaba barashatse. Bishobora kubafasha kugira igihagararo cyemewe imbere y’Imana. Kandi mu gihe abana babona ko bitaweho mu buryo bwuje urukundo, bishobora kubasunikira kurushaho kubaha no gukunda ababyeyi babo.

Imishyikirano Myiza

Kugira ngo ababyeyi bashobore gutanga inama zihuje n’ibyo abana babo bakeneye, hagomba kubaho gushyikirana hagati y’ababyeyi n’abana. Mu gihe ababyeyi baba batazi ibiri mu bwenge bw’abana babo no mu mitima yabo, inama n’aho yaba ari nziza, ishobora kugira umumaro muke, kimwe n’uko umuganga yageregeza kwandikira umurwayi umuti atazi ubwoko bw’indwara ye. Kugira ngo ababyeyi babe abajyanama bagira ingaruka nziza, bagomba kumenya ibyo abana babo batekereza n’uko biyumva by’ukuri. Bagomba gusobanukirwa ibigeragezo n’ingorane abana babo bahanganye na byo, hamwe n’ibibazo bibahangayikishije. Ni iby’ingenzi ko umuntu atega amatwi ibyo abana bavuga abigiranye ubwitonzi, kugira ngo “yihutire kumva, ariko atinde kuvuga.”—Yakobo 1:19; Imigani 12:18; Umubwiriza 7:8.

Kugira ngo ababyeyi bashobore kandi bakomeze kugirana imishyikirano ya bugufi n’abana babo, imishyikirano izatuma abana bumva bafite umudendezo wo kwatura ibyiyumvo byabo byimbitse, bisaba igihe, kwihangana n’imihati. Mbega ukuntu biba ari byiza iyo ibyo bigezweho! Umubyeyi w’umugabo wo muri Afurika y’i Burengerazuba ufite abana batanu, yagize ati “ndi se w’abana nkaba n’incuti yabo. Abana baganira nanjye bisanzuye ku bihereranye n’ibintu byose, hakubiyemo n’ibyerekeranye n’ibitsina. Ndetse n’ab’abakobwa bampishurira ibibari ku mutima. Dufata igihe cyo kuganira ku bibazo byabo. Nanone kandi, bambwira ibibashimisha.”

Uwitwa Bola, umwe mu bakobwa be, agira ati “nta banga na rimwe njya mpisha data. Data ni umuntu wita ku bandi, kandi wishyira mu mwanya wabo. Ntajya aduhutaza cyangwa ngo adusharirire, ndetse no mu gihe twaba twakoze amakosa. Aho kugira ngo arakare, asuzuma uko ibintu biteye maze akatwereka icyo twagombye gukora, cyangwa icyo twagombye kuba twakoze. Incuro nyinshi, yerekeza ku gitabo Votre jeunesse hamwe n’igitabo Bonheur familial.”a

Mu gihe bishoka, ni byiza ko ababyeyi batangira kuganira n’abana babo ku bihereranye n’ibitsina bakiri bato. Ibyo biba urufatiro rwo gukomeza kugirana ibiganiro mu gihe cy’imyaka y’ubugimbi ikunze kuba iruhije. Mu gihe ibiganiro bidatangiye hakiri kare, rimwe na rimwe biba bikomeye kubitangiza nyuma y’aho; ariko kandi birashoboka. Umubyeyi umwe w’umugore ufite abana batanu, yagize ati “nihatiye kubivugaho, kugeza ubwo amaherezo, ari jye n’abana, tutari tukigira ipfunwe ryo kubivuga.” Kubera ko imimerere myiza y’umwana iri mu kaga cyane bene ako kageni, imihati nk’iyo irakwiriye rwose.

Abana Barinzwe Kandi Bishimye

Abana bishimira ababyeyi babaha ubumenyi buzabarinda babigiranye urukundo. Reka turebe ibyavuzwe na bamwe mu Bahamya ba Yehova bo muri Afurika:

Mojisola ufite imyaka 24 yagize ati “nzahora nshimira mama. Yampaye uburere bwa ngombwa ku bihereranye n’ibitsina mu gihe gikwiriye. N’ubwo nagiraga isoni mu gihe yabaga ambwira ibyo bintu mu gihe cyashize, ubu mbona akamaro k’ibyo mama yankoreye.”

Uwitwa Iniobong yongeyeho ati “buri gihe ndishima iyo nsubije amaso inyuma maze ngatekereza ibyo mama yankoreye ampa uburere bukwiriye ku bihereranye n’ibitsina. Byabaye ubufasha bw’ingirakamaro mu kunyobora kugeza igihe nzaba ndi umugore. Niyemeje kuzakorera abana banjye ibintu nk’ibyo.”

Kunle ufite imyaka cumi n’icyenda, yagize ati “ababyeyi banjye bamfashije guhangana n’ibigeragezo by’abagore b’isi barehereza abantu mu busambanyi. Iyo ntaza kugira uburere bampaye, mba naraguye mu cyaha cy’ubusambanyi. Nzahora nzirikana ibyo bankoreye.”

Christiana yagize ati “mvana inyungu nyinshi mu kuba naragiranye na mama ibiganiro ku bihereranye n’ibitsina. Narinzwe indwara zica no gutwara ikinyendaro, kandi nashoboye kubera icyitegererezo basaza banjye na barumuna banjye. Nanone kandi, abantu baranyubaha, kandi umugabo nzashaka na we azanyubaha. Cyane cyane ariko, mfitanye na Yehova Imana imishyikirano myiza bitewe n’uko nubaha amategeko ye.”

Bola twigeze kuvuga mbere, yagize ati “hari mugenzi wanjye twiganaga wavuze ko igitsina ari icyo kwishimisha bitabaye ngombwa guhuzwa n’ishyingiranwa. Kuri we byari ukwishimisha. Nyamara ariko, yaje kubona ko bitari ukwishimisha igihe yatwaraga inda kandi ntashobore gukorana natwe ikizamini. Iyo ntaza kugira data mwiza unyobora, wenda nanjye mba narabaye nka we, ngasobanukirwa ibintu mbanje gukubitika.”

Mbega imigisha iyo ababyeyi b’Abakristo bafashije abana babo kugira ‘ubwenge bwo kubazanira agakiza’ muri iyi si yasaze mu bihereranye n’ibitsina (2 Timoteyo 3:15)! Inyigisho zabo zishingiye kuri Bibiliya, zimeze nk’imikufi y’agaciro kenshi, yizihira abana kandi ikabagira beza mu maso y’Imana (Imigani 1:8, 9). Abana bumva bafite umutekano, kandi ababyeyi babo bagira ibyishimo byimbitse. Umubyeyi w’umugabo wo muri Afurika wihatira buri gihe gukomeza gushyikirana n’abana be, yagize ati “dufite amahoro yo mu bwenge. Twiringira ko abana bacu bazi ibyo Yehova yishimira; ntibashobora gushukwa n’abo hanze. Twiringira ko batazakora ikintu cyateza umuryango agahinda. Nshimira Yehova ku bwo kuba baragaragaje ko icyizere cyacu gifite ishingiro.”

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]

[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 10]

Urubyiruko rw’Abakristo rubona ibisobanuro ruhabwa n’ababyeyi barwo bishingiye kuri Bibiliya, rushobora kuzibukira ibitekerezo bikocamye bitangwa n’urundi rubyiruko