Fasha abana bawe guhangana n’ibibazo byinshi bahura na byo

ABANA bacu bahanganye n’ibibazo bikomeye. Bugarijwe n’umwuka wa Satani wogeye muri iyi si, kandi bagomba guhangana n’“irari rya gisore” (2 Tim 2:22; 1 Yoh 5:19). Ikindi nanone, kubera ko bihatira ‘kwibuka Umuremyi wabo,’ bagomba guhangana n’abantu babaseka kandi bakabatoteza, bagamije kurwanya imyizerere yabo (Umubw 12:1). Umuvandimwe witwa Vincent, yibutse ibyamubayeho igihe yari umwana maze aravuga ati “hari umuntu wahoraga andwanya kandi akanshotora ampora ko ndi Umuhamya. Incuro nyinshi, byabaga bikaze ku buryo numvaga ntashaka gusubira ku ishuri.”a

Usibye kuba abana bacu bibasirwa n’ibitotezo byo muri iyi si, banahangana n’icyifuzo cyo gushaka kumera nk’urungano rwabo. Mushiki wacu witwa Cathleen ufite imyaka 16, yaravuze ati “kubaho mu buryo butandukanye n’ubw’abandi ntibyoroshye.” Umusore witwa Alan na we yemera ko ibyo ari ukuri. Yaravuze ati “abanyeshuri twiganaga bakundaga kuntumira ngo dusohokane mu mpera z’icyumweru, kandi mvugishije ukuri, nanjye numvaga mbyifuza.” Byongeye kandi, abakiri bato bashobora kumva bifuza cyane kwifatanya mu mikino yo ku ishuri, kandi ibyo bishobora gutuma bifatanya n’incuti mbi mu buryo bworoshye. Mushiki wacu ukiri muto witwa Tanya yaravuze ati “nkunda siporo. Buri gihe abatoza bo ku ishuri bashakaga ko njya mu ikipi y’ikigo. Kubahakanira ntibyabaga byoroshye.”

Ni gute wafasha abana bawe guhangana n’ibibazo byinshi bahura na byo? Yehova yahaye ababyeyi inshingano yo kurera abana babo (Imig 22:6; Efe 6:4). Intego ababyeyi batinya Imana baba bafite, ni ukugera ku mitima y’abana babo, bakabafasha kugira icyifuzo cyo kumvira Yehova (Imig 6:20-23). Nibabigenza batyo, abana babo bazumva bagomba kwihanganira ibitotezo byo muri iyi si, ndetse n’igihe ababyeyi babo bazaba batabareba.

Kugira ngo ababyeyi batunge umuryango kandi bawuyobore, ari na ko bita ku nshingano z’itorero, ntibiborohera. Hari n’ubikora kandi ari umubyeyi umwe mu muryango, cyangwa ahanganye n’ingorane yo kurwanywa n’uwo bashakanye utizera. Nubwo bimeze bityo ariko, Yehova asaba ababyeyi guteganya igihe cyo kwigisha abana babo no kubaha ubufasha bakeneye. None se, ni iki wakora kugira ngo ufashe abana bawe guhangana n’amoshya y’urungano, ibishuko n’ibitotezo bahura na byo buri munsi?

Imishyikirano yihariye bagirana na Yehova

Mbere na mbere, abana bacu bagomba kumenya neza Yehova, bakumva ko ariho koko. Bakeneye ko tubafasha ‘bakareba Itaboneka’ (Heb 11:27). Vincent twigeze kuvuga, yibuka ukuntu ababyeyi be bamufashije kugirana imishyikirano yihariye na Yehova. Yaravuze ati “banyigishije akamaro k’isengesho. Ndibuka ko nkiri muto nasenganga buri mugoroba mbere y’uko njya kuryama. Numvaga ndi kumwe na Yehova rwose.” Ese ujya usengana n’abana bawe? Kuki utatega amatwi ukumva ibyo babwira Yehova mu masengesho yabo? Ese buri gihe baba basubiramo amagambo amwe, cyangwa iyo basenga babwira Yehova ibibari ku mutima koko? Nutega amatwi amasengesho yabo, uzamenya niba bagenda bagirana na Yehova imishyikirano ikomeye.

Ubundi buryo bw’ingenzi cyane butuma abana begera Yehova, ni ugusoma Ijambo rye. Cathleen twigeze kuvuga, yaravuze ati “gusoma Bibiliya yose nkiri muto byaramfashije cyane. Byatumye ngira icyizere cy’uko nubwo abantu bari kundwanya, Yehova yari kunshyigikira.” Ese abana bawe bagira gahunda yabo yo gusoma Bibiliya?—Zab 1:1-3; 77:13.

Ni koko, abana ntibitabira ubuyobozi bahawe n’ababyeyi babo mu buryo bumwe. Ikindi kandi, amajyambere yabo yo mu buryo bw’umwuka ashobora gushingira ku kigero bagezemo. Icyakora iyo abakiri bato badafite ubuyobozi, kumenya Yehova neza ku buryo bumva ariho koko bishobora kubagora. Ababyeyi bagomba gucengeza mu bana babo Ijambo ry’Imana ku buryo bazajya bumva Yehova asa n’aho abavugisha, aho baba bari hose (Guteg 6:6-9). Abana bawe bagomba kwemera ko Yehova abitaho buri muntu ku giti cye.

Uko mwashyikirana mu buryo bwiza

Gushyikirana n’abana bawe na byo ni ubundi buryo bwo kubafasha. Birumvikana ko gushyikirana n’abana bawe mu buryo bwiza birenze ibi byo kubabwira amagambo gusa. Hakubiyemo no kubabaza ibibazo kandi ugatega amatwi ibyo bagusubiza wihanganye, no mu gihe bashubije uko utashakaga. Anne ufite abahungu babiri yagize ati “mbabaza ibibazo kugeza igihe numva ko nsobanukiwe neza ibyo batekereza n’ibibazo bahanganye na byo.” Ese abana bawe babona ko ubatega amatwi? Tanya twigeze kuvuga, yagize ati “mu by’ukuri, ababyeyi banjye bantegaga amatwi kandi bakibuka ibyo twaganiriye. Bari bazi n’amazina y’abanyeshuri twiganaga. Bambazaga amakuru yabo, bakambaza n’ibindi bintu twigeze kuganiraho mu gihe cyashize.” Gutega amatwi no kwibuka, ni ibintu by’ingenzi bituma abantu bashyikirana neza.

Imiryango myinshi yasanze igihe cyo gufata amafunguro, ari igihe cyiza cyo kuganira ibintu bifite akamaro. Vincent yabisobanuye agira ati “mu muryango wacu, gusangira byari bifite akamaro. Twakoraga uko dushoboye kose tukaba duhari mu gihe cyo gufata amafunguro. Kureba televiziyo, kumva radiyo cyangwa gusoma, ntibyari byemewe mu gihe cyo gufata amafunguro. Kubera ko incuro nyinshi twisanzuraga mu biganiro twagiranaga, byatumaga buri munsi mbona umwanya wo gutuza, bikamfasha guhangana n’akavuyo ndetse n’amoshya nahuraga na byo ku ishuri.” Yongeyeho ati “kumenyera kuganira n’ababyeyi banjye mu gihe cyo gufata amafunguro, byatumaga numva nisanzuye n’igihe nabaga nifuza ko bamfasha mu bibazo bikomeye.”

Ibaze uti “ni kangahe mu cyumweru abagize umuryango wacu dusangirira hamwe?” Ese ubona ko ugize ibyo uhindura maze mugashyiraho iyo gahunda, byagufasha kurushaho gushyikirana neza n’abana bawe?

Akamaro ko gukora imyitozo

Umugoroba w’iby’umwuka mu muryango wa buri cyumweru, na wo utuma abagize umuryango baganira bisanzuye, kandi ugafasha abakiri bato kuganira n’ababyeyi babo ku bibazo byihariye. Alan twigeze kuvuga, yagize ati “binyuriye mu cyigisho cy’umuryango, ababyeyi banjye batugeraga ku mutima. Bahitagamo ingingo zihuje n’ibibazo dufite.” Nyina wa Alan yagize ati “hari igihe mu cyigisho cy’umuryango twakoraga imyitozo. Iyo myitozo yafashaga abana bacu kwitoza uko basobanura imyizerere yabo, kandi bakerekana ko ibyo bizera ari ukuri. Ibyo byatumaga bagira ubutwari babaga bakeneye kugira ngo bashobore guhangana n’ibibazo bashoboraga guhura na byo.”

Mu by’ukuri iyo abakiri bato bahanganye n’amoshya y’urungano, akenshi baba bakeneye gukora ikintu kirenze kuvuga gusa ngo “oya,” hanyuma bakigendera. Bagomba kugira ubushobozi bwo gusubiza ibibazo bibabaza impamvu bakora ibintu runaka, hakagira n’ibindi badakora. Nanone baba bagomba kumva nta cyo bikanga mu gihe abantu babasetse kubera imyizerere yabo. Niba rero badashobora gusobanura imyizerere yabo, kuvuganira ugusenga k’ukuri bashize amanga byazabagora. Gukora imyitozo bishobora kubafasha gutinyuka.

Agasanduku kari ku ipaji ya 18 kagaragaza imyitozo imwe n’imwe yakinwa mu gihe cy’umugoroba w’iby’umwuka mu muryango. Gerageza gutuma iyo myitozo igira imbaraga binyuriye mu guhinyuza ibyo abana bawe bavuga. Mwifashishe amasomo y’ingirakamaro ari muri zimwe mu ngero zo muri Bibiliya, muyakoreshe muri iyo myitozo. Nta gushidikanya ko iyo myitozo izatoza abana bawe guhangana n’ibibazo bahura na byo ku ishuri n’ahandi.

Ese mu muryango wawe ni ahantu hashimishije?

Ese iyo abana bawe bavuye ku ishuri buri munsi, baba bumva bishimiye kuza mu rugo? Niba ari ahantu hashimishije, hazafasha abana bawe guhangana n’ibibazo bahura na byo buri munsi. Hari mushiki wacu ukora kuri Beteli wagize ati “ikintu cyamfashije igihe nari umwana, ni uko mu rugo hari ahantu numvaga nisanzuye. Uko imimerere mibi yo ku ishuri yabaga iri kose, nabaga nzi ko ningera mu rugo ibintu byose biri bube byiza.” Ni uwuhe mwuka urangwa mu rugo iwawe? Ese ni ahantu harangwa no ‘kuzabiranywa n’uburakari, amakimbirane [hamwe n’]amacakubiri,’ cyangwa harangwa n’‘urukundo, ibyishimo [n’]amahoro’ (Gal 5:19-23)? Ese niba hakunda kubura amahoro, ujya ugerageza kureba icyo wahindura kugira ngo mu muryango habe ahantu heza abana bawe bishimira?

Ikindi kintu wakora kugira ngo ufashe abana bawe guhangana n’ibibazo bahura na byo, ni ukubashakira incuti zibatera inkunga. Urugero, ese ushobora gutumira abavandimwe na bashiki bacu bahagaze neza mu buryo bw’umwuka, bakaza kwifatanya n’umuryango wawe mu materaniro mbonezamubano? Ese ushobora gutegura amafunguro yoroheje, ugatumira umugenzuzi cyangwa undi muntu uri mu murimo w’igihe cyose? Ese haba hari abamisiyonari uzi cyangwa abakozi ba Beteli, abana bawe bashobora kugirana na bo ubucuti, nubwo babikora binyuze ku mabaruwa, interineti cyangwa kuri telefoni? Gushyikirana n’abantu nk’abo bishobora gufasha abana bawe kugendera mu nzira nziza, kandi bigatuma bakomeza intego zabo zo mu buryo bw’umwuka. Tekereza ibintu byiza umusore Timoteyo yigiye ku ntumwa Pawulo (2 Tim 1:13; 3:10). Kuba Timoteyo yarashyikiranaga na Pawulo, byatumye akomeza kwerekeza umutima we ku ntego zo mu buryo bw’umwuka.—1 Kor 4:17.

Jya ushimira abana bawe

Yehova yishimira kubona abakiri bato bahitamo kugendera mu nzira nziza, nubwo bahura n’amoshya y’iyi si ya Satani (Zab 147:11; Imig 27:11). Nta gushidikanya ko nawe wishimira kubona abana bacu bagendera mu nzira irangwa n’ubwenge (Imig 10:1). Jya ugaragariza abana bawe ko ubitayeho, kandi ujye ubashimira ubikuye ku mutima. Yehova aha ababyeyi urugero rwiza. Igihe Yesu yabatizwaga, Yehova yaravuze ati “uri Umwana wanjye nkunda; ndakwishimira” (Mar 1:11). Ayo magambo atanga icyizere Se yamubwiye, agomba kuba yaramukomeje agatuma ashobora kwihanganira ingorane yari agiye guhura na zo. Kimwe na Yehova, mujye mutuma abana banyu babona ko mubakunda, kandi mubashimire ibyo bakora.

Ni iby’ukuri ko udashobora kurinda abana bawe ibishuko byose, ibitotezo no gusekwa. Icyakora, hari ibintu byinshi ushobora gukora ukabafasha. Mu buhe buryo? Bafashe kugirana na Yehova imishyikirano yihariye. Jya utuma buri wese yumva yisanzuye mu muryango, ku buryo bituma mugirana ibiganiro bitera inkunga. Jya utuma umugoroba w’iby’umwuka urushaho gushimisha, kandi utume mu muryango haba ahantu hashimishije. Nta gushidikanya ko nubigenza utyo, abana bawe bazaba bafite ubushobozi bwo guhangana n’ibibazo byinshi bahura na byo.

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]

[Agasanduku/​Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 18]

IMYITOZO YABAFASHA

Dore ingero zimwe z’imimerere abana bawe bakunze guhura na yo. Byaba byiza mukoze imwe muri iyi myitozo mu gihe cy’umugoroba w’iby’umwuka mu muryango.

▸ Umutoza arasaba umwana wawe kujya mu ikipi y’ikigo.

▸ Umwana wawe avuye ku ishuri, bamuhereye itabi mu nzira.

▸ Hari abahungu babwiye umwana wawe ko bazamukubita nibongera kumubona abwiriza.

▸ Igihe umwana wawe ari mu murimo wo kubwiriza ku nzu n’inzu, ahuye n’umunyeshuri bigana.

▸ Umwana wawe barimo baramubariza imbere y’abanyeshuri impamvu atajya aramutsa ibendera.

▸ Umuhungu umwe ajya akunda guseka umwana wawe, kubera ko ari Umuhamya wa Yehova.

[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 17]

Ese abana bawe bagira gahunda yabo yo gusoma Bibiliya?

[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 19]

Ese ujya utumira abantu bakuze mu buryo bw’umwuka mu materaniro mbonezamubano?