MUTU 11
Pambuyo Pa Tsiku La Ukwati
“Chikondi sichitha.”—1 AKORINTO 13:8.
1, 2. Kodi banja likamakumana ndi mavuto ndiye kuti silingayendenso bwino? Fotokozani.
BANJA ndi mphatso yochokera kwa Yehova ndipo lingapangitse munthu kukhala wosangalala. Komabe banja lililonse limakhala ndi mavuto. Nthawi zina zingaoneke ngati mavutowo sadzatha ndipo mwamuna ndi mkazi wake sangamakondanenso ngati poyamba.
2 Tisamadabwe ngati nthawi zina banja lathu limakumana ndi mavuto. Ndipotu mavuto satanthauza kuti basi banjalo silidzayendanso bwino. Mabanja ena amene ankakumana ndi mavuto aakulu anapeza njira yolimbanirana ndi mavutowo ndipo panopa zinthu zikuyenda bwino. Kodi zimenezi zinatheka bwanji?
MUZIKONDA KWAMBIRI MULUNGU KOMANSO MUZIKONDA MWAMUNA KAPENA MKAZI WANU
3, 4. Kodi nthawi zina m’banja mungachitike chiyani?
3 Banja limapangidwa ndi anthu awiri osiyana zokonda, maganizo komanso mmene amachitira zinthu. Komanso nthawi zina anthuwo amakhala a zikhalidwe zosiyana. Choncho pamafunika nthawi komanso khama kuti anthuwa adziwane bwino komanso kuti ayambe kumvetsetsana.
4 Zaka zikamapita, aliyense angayambe kutanganidwa ndi zinthu zina zomwe amapanga payekha ndipo izi zingachititse kuti asamagwirizanenso ndi mnzakeyo ngati poyamba. Zingayambe kuoneka ngati aliyense amangochita zake. Kodi n’chiyani chingathandize kuti ayambirenso kugwirizana?
Malangizo a m’Baibulo amathandiza kuti banja likhale labwino
5. (a) Kodi n’chiyani chingathandize kuti Mkhristu azigwirizana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wake? (b) Mogwirizana ndi Aheberi 13:4, kodi ukwati tiyenera kumauona bwanji?
5 Yehova amapereka malangizo abwino amene angathandize anthu okwatirana kuti akhale naye pa ubwenzi komanso kuti azigwirizana. (Salimo 25:4; Yesaya 48:17, 18) Iye amatiuza kuti: “Ukwati ukhale wolemekezeka kwa onse.” (Aheberi 13:4) Chinthu chimene munthu amachiona kuti n’cholemekezeka, chimakhala chamtengo wapatali kwa iyeyo moti amachitetezera ndipo sachiseweretsa. Umu ndi mmene Yehova amafuna kuti tizionera ukwati.
KUKONDA YEHOVA KUNGATHANDIZE KUTI BANJA LANU LIZIYENDA BWINO
6. Kodi lemba la Mateyu 19:4-6 limatiuza kuti maganizo a Yehova ndi otani pa nkhani ya banja?
6 Yehova ndi amene anayambitsa banja loyamba ndipo Mwana wake Yesu ananena kuti: “Kodi simunawerenge kuti amene analenga anthu pa chiyambi pomwe anawalenga mwamuna ndi mkazi n’kunena kuti, ‘Pa chifukwa chimenechi mwamuna adzasiya bambo ake ndi mayi ake n’kudziphatika kwa mkazi wake, ndipo awiriwo adzakhala thupi limodzi’? Chotero salinso awiri, koma thupi limodzi. Choncho chimene Mulungu wachimanga pamodzi, munthu asachilekanitse.” (Mateyu 19:4-6) Kuyambira pa chiyambi, Yehova anakonza zoti banja lisamathe. Iye amafuna kuti mabanja azigwirizana komanso azisangalala.
7. Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi wake angatani kuti banja lawo likhale lolimba?
7 Koma masiku ano mabanja akukumana ndi mavuto ambiri. Nthawi zina mavutowa amakhala aakulu moti anthuwo amataya mtima n’kuyamba kuganiza kuti bola kungothetsa banjalo. Koma kudziwa maganizo a Yehova pa nkhaniyi kungatithandize.—1 Yohane 5:3.
8, 9. (a) Kodi ndi nthawi iti pamene tiyenera kutsatira malangizo a Yehova okhudza banja? (b) Kodi tingasonyeze bwanji kuti banja lathu ndi lamtengo wapatali kwa ifeyo?
8 Nthawi zonse malangizo amene Yehova amatipatsa amakhala othandiza. Monga taonera, iye amatiuza kuti: “Ukwati ukhale wolemekezeka.” (Aheberi 13:4; Mlaliki 5:4) Tikamatsatira malangizo a Yehova, ngakhale pamene kuchita zimenezi kuli kovuta, zinthu zimatiyendera bwino.—1 Atesalonika 1:3; Aheberi 6:10.
9 Ngati timaona kuti banja lathu ndi lamtengo wapatali, tidzapewa kuchita kapena kulankhula zinthu zimene zingawononge banja lathu. M’malomwake tidzayesetsa kuchita zinthu zimene zingathandize kuti tizigwirizana komanso tizikondana kwambiri ndi mnzathuyo. Kodi tingachite bwanji zimenezi?
ZIMENE MUMACHITA KOMANSO KULANKHULA ZIZISONYEZA KUTI MUMALEMEKEZA BANJA LANU
10, 11. (a) Kodi m’mabanja ena muli mavuto aakulu ati? (b) N’chifukwa chiyani tiyenera kusamala ndi mmene timalankhulira ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu?
10 Pali zinthu zambiri zimene zingachititse kuti mwamuna kapena mkazi akhumudwitse mnzake. Tikudziwa kuti Mkhristu sayenera kumenya mwamuna kapena mkazi wake kapenanso kuchita chilichonse chimene chingamuvulaze. Koma ngati titapanda kusamala, tingathe kuvulaza mnzathuyo ndi mawu athu. Mawu akhoza kukhala ngati chida chomenyera munthu. Mwachitsanzo, mayi wina anati: “Mwamuna wanga amandimenya ndi mawu. Mwina mungaone kuti ndilibe mabala paliponse. Koma mawu opweteka amene amandilankhula monga akuti, ‘umandisowetsa mtendere’ komanso ‘ndilibe nawe ntchito,’ amasiya zipsera mumtima mwanga.” Mwamuna wina ananena kuti mkazi wake amamunyoza komanso amamutchula mayina achipongwe. Iye anati: “Sindingathe kutchula pagulu mawu amene iye amanena. N’chifukwa chake sindifuna kulankhula naye ndipo ndimapita kunyumba mochedwa. Ndimaona kuti bola kukhala kuntchito kusiyana n’kupita kunyumba.” Masiku ano anthu ambiri amakonda kulankhula mawu achipongwe, otukwana komanso onyoza.
11 Ngati anthu okwatirana amalankhulana mawu achipongwe, aliyense amakhala ndi mabala mumtima mwake ndipo zimatenga nthawi kuti mabalawo apole. N’chifukwa chake Yehova safuna kuti anthu okwatirana azilankhulana mawu achipongwe. Koma nthawi zina mungakhumudwitse mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu mosadziwa. Mwina inuyo mungamaone kuti mumalankhula bwino. Koma kodi mnzanuyo amamva bwanji? Ngati amakhumudwa ndi zolankhula zanu, kodi sizingakhale bwino kuti musinthe?—Agalatiya 5:15; werengani Aefeso 4:31.
12. Kodi n’chiyani chingasokoneze ubwenzi wa munthu wapabanja ndi Yehova?
12 Mmene mumalankhulira ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu, kaya pagulu kapena kwanokha, zimakhudza ubwenzi wanu ndi Yehova. (Werengani 1 Petulo 3:7.) Lemba la Yakobo 1:26 limatiuza kuti: “Ngati munthu akudziona ngati wopembedza, koma salamulira lilime lake, ndipo akupitiriza kunyenga mtima wake, kupembedza kwa munthu ameneyu n’kopanda pake.”
13. Tchulani chinthu china chomwe chingachititse kuti munthu akhumudwitse mwamuna kapena mkazi wake.
13 Pali zinthu zina zimene munthu wapabanja ayenera kusamala nazo kuti asakhumudwitse mnzake. Mwachitsanzo, kodi mnzanuyo angamve bwanji ngati mwayamba kukhala nthawi yaitali muli ndi munthu wina? Zimene mumachita ndi munthuyo zikhoza kukhala zinthu zabwinobwino monga kulowa mu utumiki kapena kumuthandiza pa vuto linalake. Koma mfundo yofunika kuiganizira ndi yakuti, kodi zimenezo sizikukhumudwitsa mnzanuyo? Mlongo wina anati: “Ndimakhumudwa chifukwa choona kuti mwamuna wanga amakhala nthawi yaitali akuthandiza mlongo wina. Zimenezi zimandipangitsa kudziona ngati ndine wosafunika.”
14. (a) Kodi tikuphunzira mfundo iti palemba la Genesis 2:24? (b) Kodi tiyenera kudzifunsa funso liti?
14 Akhristufe tili ndi udindo wothandiza makolo athu komanso abale ndi alongo mumpingo. Koma tikakwatira kapena kukwatiwa, udindo wathu waukulu umakhala kusamalira mwamuna kapena mkazi wathuyo. Yehova ananena kuti mwamuna ‘amadziphatika kwa mkazi wake.’ (Genesis 2:24) Choncho tiyenera kuona kuti zofuna za mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu ndi zofunika kwambiri. Muzidzifunsa kuti, ‘Kodi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanga ndimam’patsa nthawi yokwanira komanso chikondi chomwe amafunikira?’
15. N’chifukwa chiyani Mkhristu wapabanja ayenera kupewa kugwirizana kwambiri ndi munthu amene si mwamuna kapena mkazi wake?
15 Kugwirizana kwambiri ndi munthu amene si mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu kungayambitse mavuto m’banja. Mwina tingayambe kumukonda kwambiri munthuyo komanso kumulakalaka. (Mateyu 5:28) Maganizo amenewa akhoza kukula ndipo angachititse kuti munthu achite zinthu zimene zingasokoneze banja lake.
“POGONA PA ANTHU OKWATIRANA PAKHALE POSAIPITSIDWA”
16. Kodi Baibulo limapereka lamulo liti lokhudza banja?
16 Paulo atapereka malangizo akuti, “Ukwati ukhale wolemekezeka,” ananena kuti: “Ndipo pogona pa anthu okwatirana pakhale posaipitsidwa, pakuti Mulungu adzaweruza adama ndi achigololo.” (Aheberi 13:4) Mawu akuti “pogona pa anthu okwatirana” akutanthauza kugonana pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi wake. (Miyambo 5:18) Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi wake angasonyeze bwanji kuti amalemekeza zimenezi komanso saipitsa pogona pawo?
17. (a) Kodi anthu ambiri masiku ano amaona bwanji chigololo? (b) Kodi Akhristu ayenera kuona bwanji chigololo?
17 Anthu ena amaona kuti palibe vuto kukhala osakhulupirika kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo. Koma sitiyenera kutengera maganizo amenewa. Yehova amanena momveka bwino kuti amadana ndi chiwerewere komanso chigololo. (Werengani Aroma 12:9; Aheberi 10:31; 12:29) Ngati titagonana ndi munthu yemwe si mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu ndiye kuti taipitsa ukwati wathu. Komanso tingasonyeze kuti sitilemekeza mfundo za Yehova ndipo tingawononge ubwenzi wathu ndi iye. Choncho tiyenera kupewa chilichonse chimene chingachititse kuti tichite chigololo. Zimenezi zikuphatikizapo kupewa kusirira munthu wina yemwe si mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu.—Yobu 31:1.
18. (a) Kodi kuchita chigololo kukufanana bwanji ndi kulambira milungu yonama? (b) Kodi Yehova amaona bwanji chigololo?
18 M’Chilamulo cha Mose munali lamulo losonyeza kuti kuchita chigololo linali tchimo lalikulu lofanana ndi kulambira milungu yonama. Chilango cha machimo onsewa chinali kuphedwa. (Levitiko 20:2, 10) Kodi chigololo chinkafanana bwanji ndi kulambira milungu yonama? Mwisiraeli akalambira milungu yonama, ankakhala kuti waphwanya lonjezo lake lakuti adzakhala wokhulupirika kwa Yehova. Ngati wachita chigololo, ankakhala kuti waphwanya lonjezo lakuti adzakhala wokhulupirika kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wake. (Ekisodo 19:5, 6; Deuteronomo 5:9; werengani Malaki 2:14.) Izi zikusonyeza kuti Yehova ankaona kuti kuchita chigololo ndi tchimo lalikulu.
19. Kodi n’chiyani chingatithandize kuti tisachite chigololo?
19 Nanga bwanji masiku ano? Ngakhale kuti panopa sititsatira Chilamulo cha Mose, Yehova amaonabe kuti kuchita chigololo ndi tchimo lalikulu. Monga zilili kuti sitingalambire milungu yonama, sitiyeneranso kukhala wosakhulupirika kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu. (Salimo 51:1, 4; Akolose 3:5) Ngati titachita zimenezi tingasonyeze kuti sitikulemekeza ukwati komanso Mulungu wathu Yehova.—Onani Mawu Akumapeto 26.
ZIMENE MUNGACHITE KUTI BANJA LANU LIKHALE LOLIMBA
20. Kodi nzeru zingathandize bwanji munthu kukhala ndi banja labwino?
20 Kodi mungatani kuti banja lanu likhale lolimba? Baibulo limati: “Nzeru zimamanga banja la munthu, ndipo kuzindikira kumachititsa kuti lilimbe kwambiri.” (Miyambo 24:3) Banja tingaliyerekezere ndi nyumba. M’nyumba mwa munthu mukhoza kukhala mozizira komanso mopanda chilichonse kapena mukhoza kukhala motentha bwino, mosangalatsa komanso malo otetezeka. Mofanana ndi zimenezi, munthu wanzeru amaonetsetsa kuti banja lake ndi losangalala komanso lili ngati malo otetezeka.
21. Kodi kudziwa zinthu kungathandize bwanji munthu kukhala ndi banja lolimba?
21 Vesi lotsatira limati: “Kudziwa zinthu kumachititsa kuti zipinda zamkati mwa nyumba zidzaze ndi zinthu zonse zamtengo wapatali ndiponso zosangalatsa.” (Miyambo 24:4) Zimene mwaphunzira m’Mawu a Mulungu zingathandize kuti banja lanu lisinthe n’kuyamba kuyenda bwino. (Aroma 12:2; Afilipi 1:9) Mukamawerenga limodzi Baibulo komanso mabuku athu, muzikambirana zimene mungachite kuti muzitsatira zimene mukuphunzirazo. Muziganiziranso zimene mungachite kuti muzisonyeza mnzanuyo chikondi, ulemu, kukoma mtima komanso kumuganizira. Muzipempha Yehova kuti akuthandizeni kukhala ndi makhalidwe amene angalimbitse banja lanu komanso amene angathandize kuti mnzanuyo azikukondani kwambiri.—Miyambo 15:16, 17; 1 Petulo 1:7.
Mukamachita kulambira kwa pabanja muzidalira Yehova kuti azikutsogolerani
22. N’chifukwa chiyani tiyenera kukonda komanso kulemekeza mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu?
22 Tiyenera kuyesetsa kuti tizisonyeza mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu kuti timamukonda komanso timamulemekeza. Tikatero banja lathu lidzakhala losangalala komanso lolimba. Komanso chofunika kwambiri ndi choti timasangalatsa Yehova.—Salimo 147:11; Aroma 12:10.