Aware Akyi Mpenatwe​—Dɛn Nti Na Ɛnsɛ Sɛ Wode Wo Ho Hyem?

“WO NKUTOO.” Saa dwom bi a agye din mu nsɛm yi kyerɛ sɛnea mmarima ne mmea pii te nka ma onipa a wɔware no no. Nanso aware mu nokwaredi a ɛte sɛɛ no di nna ahe?

Aware akyi mpenatwe yɛ nea ɛkɔ so kɛse wɔ nnɛyi adesamma abusua no mu araa ma sɛ obi nni mpena a, ɛkame ayɛ sɛ wobu no sɛ enye. Nnipa binom wɔ hɔ a wɔpene aware akyi mpenatwe yi so, wɔde anoyi ma wɔ ho na wɔkamfo kyerɛ mpo. Ebinom nso kyerɛ sɛ ɛma aware tumi yɛ yiye. Sɛnea adwenemyare ho ɔbenfo Tony Lake ne sɛnkyerɛwfo Ann Hills kyerɛwee wɔ wɔn nhoma Affairs: The Anatomy of Extra-Marital Relationships no mu no: “Akyinnye biara nni ho sɛ kokoam mpenatwe rema awarefo pii asetra ayɛ nea anigye ne atirimpɔw kɛse wom.”

Mmea nsɛmma nhoma ahorow a agye din bisa pefee sɛ: “So mpenatwe bɛbɔ w’aware ho ban? Wɔ mmuaema mu no, wɔtaa ka sɛ mpenatwe betumi ama woahu wo hokafo no yiye anaasɛ woadi wo sintɔ wɔ ɔbarima ne ɔbea nna mu ho dwuma. Ebinom ka sɛ ɛbɛma woatumi anya osuahu kɛse, wo ne wo hokafo ne wo mma atumi anya abusuabɔ a emu yɛ den na monam saa yɛ so anya anigye kɛse. Wɔma wunya adwene sɛ, sɛ woantwe mpena a, ɛnde na worehwere biribi. Nanso so ɛte saa?

So Mpenatwe Ma Aware Tumi yɛ Yiye Kɛse?

So ɛbɛyɛ sɛ aware akyi mpenatwe a wɔrema agye din yi na ɛrema awaregu adɔɔso wɔ yɛn bere yi mu no? Wɔ Sweden no, ɛkame ayɛ sɛ aware anum biara mu abiɛsa gu. Awaregu wɔ aman afoforo so nso dɔɔso.​—Hwɛ adaka a ɛka ho a ɛne “Aware ne Awaregu ho Akontaabu ma 1983” no mu.

Aware a ɛte sɛɛ a awaresɛe ma wogyae no dodow yɛ ahe? Bere a Lake ne Hills reka nnipa a wogyae aware wɔ United Kingdom no dodow ho asɛm no, wose: “Mmarima a wogyaee aware ansa na wɔredi mfe aduanan no mu bɛboro fã kae wɔ asɛm a wɔde kɔɔ asennibea no mu sɛ awaresɛe nti na wogyaee aware. Ɛyɛ nea ntease wom sɛ yɛbɛka sɛ na awarefo yi mu pii asɛe aware de, nanso wɔanka ho asɛm sɛ ɛne ade titiriw nti a wɔde asɛm no kɔɔ asennibea. Wɔ bere koro no ara mu no, sɛ aware akyi mpenatwe nyɛ nea ɛdɔɔso sen awaregyae wɔ afe biara mu a, ɛbɛyɛ yɛn nwonwa kɛse.”

Nhwehwɛmu bi a wɔyɛe wɔ China wɔ Shanghai sukuu bi mu nnansa yi no ma wohui sɛ mpenatwe wɔ aware akyi ne ade titiriw a wogyina so gyae aware wɔ saa ɔman no mu. Amanneɛbɔ a efi Shanghai no ka sɛ, aware ampenatwe nti wogyae no dodow “bu bɔɔ ho abiɛsa wɔ mfe abien a etwaam no mu.”

Akyinnye biara nni ho sɛ aware akyi mpenatwe ne nneɛma atitiriw a ɛsɛe aware no mu biako. Ɛnde so wobetumi akamfo mpenatwe akyerɛ sɛ aware a ɔhaw wom ano aduru? So wobetumi akamfo aduru a ekunkum nnipa a wɔnom no mu ɔha biara mu 30 kosi 40 anaa nea ɛboro saa no akyerɛ sɛ wɔn yare no ano aduru”? Dabida!

Ebinom ka sɛ eye sɛ obi remma ne hokafo no nhu mpena a ɔtwe no. Nanso wɔ ɔkwan bɛn so? Lake ne Hills kyerɛkyerɛ mu sɛ: “Wɔtaa de atosɛm ne nnaadaa katakata mpenatwe no so. Sɛ ebia wɔtwe mpena no wɔ kokoam anaasɛ ɛnte saa, anaasɛ wɔagyae anaasɛ wogu so no, ɛyɛ nea wɔtaa de atosɛm no ‘bɔ’ aware no anaasɛ emu nneɛma bi ho ‘ban.’ Nokwasɛm kakra wɔ atosɛm ahorow yi pii mu efisɛ ɛyɛ den kɛse sɛ wɔbɛka nokware a ɛwom no nyinaa ho asɛm anaasɛ esiane sɛ ebetumi asɛe okunu ne ɔyere no ntam abusuabɔ no kɛse nti.”

Sɛ ɔbarima ne ɔbea ware a, wɔhyɛ wɔn ho wɔn ho nsa. Sɛ́ obi bebu apam yi so no kyerɛ sɛ wanni nokware. So atosɛm, nnaadaa ne atosɛm a nokwasɛm kakra wom no ama daa anigye aba aware bi mu pɛn? Enti ansa na obi benya adwene sɛ ɔbɛtwe mpena wɔ kokoam no, eye sɛ obebisa ne ho sɛ: “So nnipa a wɔtwe mpena no nyinaa nya anigye kɛse? Na afobu nka a wɔte ne suro a wosuro bere nyinaa sɛ awiei koraa no wɔbɛkyere wɔn no nso ɛ?

Nanso afoforo nso ka sɛ atirimpɔw titiriw nti a ɛsɛ sɛ wɔware ne sɛ wɔbɛwo mma na hia a ɛho hia sɛ obi de ne ho bata ne hokafo ho no ano brɛ ase bere a mmofra no nyinyin na wofi fie hɔ no. Wɔkyerɛ sɛ wobetumi asan akanyan nna ho anigye bio. Enti mfomso bɛn na ɛwɔ mpenatwe mu?

Nna Ho “Anigye Foforo a Wɔsan Nya”

Adwenemyare ho abenfo ne nnipa a wotu mmusua fo binom kamfo kyerɛ sɛ, ɛsɛ sɛ nnipa a wɔwɔ wɔn mfinimfini mfe mu no twe mpena wɔ wɔn aware akyi de kanyan wɔn ho. Lake ne Hills ka sɛ: “Mpenatwe wɔ bere yi mu betumi ama asomdwoe a ɛwɔ aware bi mu no ayɛ kɛse mpo ma awarefo no mu biako atumi akeka ne ho wɔ akwan foforo so a ɛrenyɛ ɔhaw mma ɔfoforo no koraa.”

Ampa, mpenatwe betumi akanyan nna ho akɔnnɔ a obi wɔ no kɛse anaasɛ ebedwudwo ne pɛsɛmenkominya akɔnnɔ no ano kakra. Ɔbea bi a ɔwɔ ne mfinimfini mfe mu no ka sɛ, “Ɛte sɛ nea ɛyɛ adwempa sɛ wubenya mpena.”

Susuw nea ɛbaa ɔbarima bi a ɔwɔ ne mfinimfini mfe mu no so bere a ɔne ne kyerɛwfo a wanyin sen no mfe 18 dae no ho. N’aware a adi mfe 30 no gui na ofii ase nom nsa pii ma awiei koraa no, woyii no adi fii n’adwuma mu. Ɔka sɛ: “Meyɛɛ saa esiane sɛ mibu me ho kɛse nti. Hwɛ sɛ wɔ mfe a madi yi nyinaa akyi no, matumi anya ababaa a ne ho yɛ fɛ ne no ada. Migye di sɛ ɛho hia sɛ wode eyi hoahoa wo ho na woma wohu ɔbarima ko a woyɛ no na ɛma mmarima yɛ nkwaseade a wɔyɛ no mu pii, sɛ wonya hokwan a. Eyi nye efisɛ ahohoahoa a ɛte sɛɛ gyina atoro nhyɛase so.”

Ɛyɛ “atoro nhyɛase” ampa! Bible no kae bere tenten a atwam ni sɛ: “Ahantan di ɔsɛe anim, na kwasiare honhom di asehwe kan.”​—Mmebusɛm 16:18.

So Nna ne Ade Titiriw?

Ebinom ne nnipa afoforo a wɔnyɛ wɔn ahokafo nya nna mu kyɛfa efisɛ wosusuw sɛ nea wonya wɔ aware mu no mmee wɔn. Wosusuwsɛ anigye wɔ asetra mu gyina nna mu kyɛfa kɛse a wonya no so. Wɔ wɔn fam no, ɔhokafo biako a obi ne no benya nna mu kyɛfa wɔ ne nkwa nna nyinaa mu no yɛ nea ne bere atwam. Sɛnea asetra mu nsɛm ho ɔbenfo Rita Lijestrom a ɔwɔ Sweden kae no: “Nnipa pii nni nokware wɔ wɔn aware mu wɔ Sweden. Wɔserew nnipa a wodi nokware wɔ wɔn aware mu no. ‘Yɛpɛ sɛ yɛkyerɛ sɛ yɛn ani abue.’

Nea ɛyɛ anigye no, Bible no wɔ pii ka wɔ ɔbarima ne ɔbea nna ho na ɛda adwene a ɛkari pɛ adi wɔ asɛm no ho. Sɛ nhwɛso no, susuw nea ɔhene Salomo onyansafo no kyerɛwee no ho:

“Nom w’abura mu nsu a ɛsen fi wo nsuti mu: wo nsuaniwa bebu so afi adi ayɛ mmɔnten so asuten; ɛbɛyɛ wo nko dea, na ɛnyɛ wo ne ahɔho bi dea. Ma w’abura nyɛ nhyira, na wo ne wo mmerantebere mu yere ani nnye; ɔdɔ satwe ne anuonyam wansan no: ma ne mpokua nsɔ w’ani daa, tɔ ne dɔ mu ntintan daa yi. Me ba, adɛn na wotɔ ɔbea nanani ho ntintan, na wuso ɔbea hɔho kokom?”​—Mmebusɛm 5: 15-20.

Enti Bible mmu ‘ntintantɔ’ ne akomatɔyam a ɛsɛ sɛ nna ma ɔbarima ne ɔbea nya no adewa. Nanso hyɛ no nsow sɛ ɛsɛ sɛ obi ‘ne ne mmerantebere mu yere’ yɛ eyi wɔ aware mu.

Ɛwom, nna ho akɔnnɔ a ɔbarima ne ɔbea wɔ no betumi ayɛ nea nsonsonoe wom. Na sɛnea ɛte wɔ asetra mu nneɛma afoforo pii mu no, abusuabɔ a anigye wom hwehwɛ sɛ obi bɛyɛ nsakrae na wanya ɔpɛ sɛ ɔne afoforo bɛkyɛ nea ɔwɔ. Saa na ɛte wɔ nna mu nso. Ɛsɛ sɛ wodi nkitaho. Ɛho hia sɛ wɔn mu biara hu nea ne yɔnko tumi yɛ ne nea ɔpɛ. Ɔsomafo Paulo kamfo kyerɛ sɛ: “Okunu mma ɔyere nea ɛsɛ, na ɔyere nso mma okunu saa ara.” Bere a wɔyɛ saa no, eye sɛ wobedi nnyinasosɛm a ɛfa asɛm no ho yi akyi: “Obiara nnhwehwɛ nea ɛyɛ n’ankasa de, na mmom ɔnhwehwɛ nea ɛyɛ ne yɔnko de.”​—1 Korintofo 7:3; 10:24.

Ɛwom sɛ nna wɔ n’afã wɔ aware mu de, nanso ɛno nkyerɛ sɛ ɛne ade titiriw wom anaasɛ ɛnyɛ nea worentumi nto nna ho akɔnnɔ ano hye. Sɛ mfatoho no: Bible no ka sɛ nsa a wɔde anidahɔ nom no tumi ma ‘ɔdesani koma tɔ ne yam.’ (Dwom 104:15) Nanso ɛnkyerɛ sɛ ɛsɛ sɛ yɛma yɛn ani gye nsa ho tra so anaasɛ ɛnyɛ nea ɛho hia sɛ yesusuw bere, faako, ne sɛnea yɛnom nsa no ho.​—Mmebusɛm 20:1; 23:29-35.

Nnyinasosɛm a Pɛsɛmenkominya Nnim

Dabi, ɛnyɛ nna nkutoo ne aware a anigye wom nhyɛase na saa ara na ɛnyɛ nea eye sen biara nso. Adamfofa su, odwo, afoforo ho a wosusuw, ntease ne nokwaredi ka ɔdɔ ɛma wonya akomatɔyam a ɛtra hɔ daa no ho. Saa na ɔdɔ a ɛwɔ aware mu ankasa no te. Ɛno na ɛtra hɔ, ɛboa awarefo ma wotumi gyina mu bere a wohyia sɔhwɛ ahorow na nipadua anaasɛ adwene mu yare mma wontumi nnya nna mu kyɛfa anaasɛ onyin ma wogurow a wɔn ahoɔfɛ asa no.

Nea etwa to koraa no, afotu a eye sen biara no wɔ Nhoma a ɛsen nhoma nyinaa, Bible, no mu bere a ɛka sɛ: “Di w’ankasa yere nokware na yi ɔdɔ adi kyerɛ ne nkutoo” no. (Mmebusɛm 5:15, Today’s English Version) Kristoni ɔsomafo Paulo de kaa ho sɛ: “Wonni aware ni, ade nyinaa mu, na wonngu aware mpa ho fi.” (Hebrifo 13:4) Nea ɛne eyi hyia no, Yesu Kristo kaee nnipa bi a wobisaa n’asɛm wɔ ne bere so no sɛ: “Monkanee sɛ efi mfiase no, nea ɔbɔɔ nnipa no, ɔbarima ne ɔbea na ɔyɛɛ wɔn, na ɔkae sɛ: Eyi nti na onipa begyaw agya ne ɛna, na ɔde ne ho akɔbata ne yere ho, na wɔn baanu no akɔyɛ ɔhonam koro?’​—Mateo 19:4, 5; Genesis 2:24.

Aware a wɔahyehyɛ asi ɔdɔ a pɛsɛmenkominya nnim a ɛte sɛɛ ne nokwaredi so ne ɔdɔ a emu yɛ den a wɔwɔ ma Onyankopɔn ne n’Asɛm no ma​—awarefo baanu no nyinaa, wɔn mma ne afoforo a wɔka ho nyinaa nya daa anigye.

[Asɛm a wɔafa aka wɔ kratafa 8]

Aware akyi mpenatwe abu so kɛse nnɛ araa ma sɛ obi nyɛ bi a, ɛkame ayɛ sɛ wobu no sɛ enye

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“Ne saa nti kwae mu gyata bekum wɔn, sare so habɔdɔm bɛsɛe wɔn, ɔsebɔ rewɛn wɔn nkurow ho. Obiara a obefi adi no, wɔbɛtetew no asinasin; efisɛ wɔn mmarato dɔɔso, na wɔn akyirisan no asõ. Eyi de, ɛbɛyɛ dɛn na mede mefiri wo? Wo mma agyaw me, na wɔkeka wɔn a wɔnyɛ anyame ho ntam. Na mema wɔmee mpo a, wɔsɛe aware ara, na wɔbɔ yuu kɔ aguaman fi. Wɔte sɛ apɔnkɔnini abran a wɔbɔ anworaman, wobobɔ wɔn mfɛfo yerenom ho mmɔn. So merentua eyinom sa ka? anaasɛ merenni were ɔman a ɛte sɛɛ so anaa?”​—Yeremia 5:6-9.

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Aware ne Awaregu ho Akontaabu ma 1983

Aware Awaregu Nkyeyem

U.S.A.: 2,444,000 1,179,000 2 mu bɛyɛ 1

U.S.S.R.: 2,834,000 946,000 3 mu 1

Australia: 113,905 41,412a 3 mu bɛboro 1

Cuba: 76,365 29,249 5 mu bɛyɛ 2

Netherlands: 78,415 32,596 5 mu bɛyɛ 2

United Kingdom: 387,000 145,802b 5 mu bɛyɛ 2

Hungary: 75,978 29,000 About 2 in 5

Denmark: 27,096 14,763 2 mu bɛboro 1

Sweden: 36,210 20,618 5 mu bɛboro 3

Akontaabu yi fi Demographic Yearbook 1983 no mu. Woyii Sweden ne Denmark de no fii Yearbook of Nordic Statistics 1984 mu no mu.

[Ase hɔ nsɛm]

[Kratafa 9 mfoni]

Ɔbarima ne ne yere ntam abusuabɔ a anigye wom hwehwɛ sɛ wodi nkitaho na wonya ɔpɛ sɛ wɔbɛyɛ nsakrae