Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Kutheni Kufuneka Sifuduke?

Ufika ekhaya uvela esikolweni uyicebe kakuhle impela-veki—uza kuchitha usuku elwandle, uza kudlala ibhola, uza kuchitha ubusuku uzolile ufunda. Kodwa xa uMama efika ekhaya evela emsebenzini, inkangeleko yobuso bakhe idiza ukuba kukho undonakele. Uthi, ‘Emsebenzini bathe mandikhethe phakathi kokutshintshelwa kwenye indawo okanye ndiyeke ukusebenza. Ndibona ngathi kuza kufuneka sifuduke.’ Ngoko nangoko uyadakumba.

UKUBA intsapho yakowenu sele iza kufuduka, asiyiyo yodwa eyenjenjalo. Kwamanye amazwe ahambele phambili kwezoshishino, ukufuduka kuye kwayinto yomhla nezolo kwiintsapho ezininzi. Ngokomzekelo, eUnited States iSebe Lobalo-bantu liqikelela ukuba umntu waseMerika oqhelekileyo uya kufuduka kali-12 ebudeni bexesha lokuphila kwakhe. Ewe, nyaka ngamnye malunga nezigidi ezili-12 zolutsha lwaseMerika ziyaxinezeleka ngenxa yemfuduko! Noko ke, amanani anjalo akathuthuzeli kangako xa iyintsapho yakowenu efudukayo. Usenokukhathazwa koko ukulindeleyo. Ubuhlungu usenokubuza oku, ‘Kutheni kufuneka sifuduke?’

Iintsapho Ezifudukayo

Ngokufuthi intsapho ayinandlela yakuwuphepha lo mbandela. Kumaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile intsapho kaElimeleki noNahomi yanyanzeleka ukuba isabele kwilizwe eliselumelwaneni lakwaMowabhi xa indlala yayithwaxa elakwaSirayeli. (Rute 1:1, 2) Abazali abaninzi namhlanje bazifumanisa nabo bekwiingxaki ezifanayo. Kumazwe asakhasayo, imbalela nokunganyanyekelwa kwemekobume ziye zanyanzelela izigidi ukuba zifudukele kwizixeko ezinabantu abaninzi gqitha nakumaziko okunikela uncedo—okanye kwamanye amazwe. Kumazwe aseNtshona, ukudodobala kwezoqoqosho kubangele imizi-mveliso namashishini amaninzi avalwe. Iifama ezazichumile ngaphambili ziye azabi nangeniso. Imisebenzi iye yanqaba. Ngaloo ndlela abazali bakho basenokuba ayikho enye into abanokuyenza ngaphandle kokuba kufuneke baye kummandla ochume ngakumbi.

Noko ke, asizizo zonke iintsapho ezifuduka kuba zibaleka ubuhlwempu. Ukunyuselwa emsebenzini, ukufuduka kwenkampani eqeshe abazali bakho, ukuqhawuka komtshato, ubunkenenkene bempilo, imozulu embi—zonke ezi zizizathu eziqhelekileyo ezibangela ukuba ezinye iintsapho zifuduke. Isazi ngentlalo yoluntu uJohn D. Kasarda uphawula esinye isizathu esixhaphakileyo: “Kukho ingcamango yokuba izixeko zinobungozi ngakumbi namhlanje. Iziyobisi, ngokukodwa, zibangele lwanda ngokukhawuleza ulwaphulo-mthetho ebantwini nakwizinto zabo.” Abanye bavakalelwa kukuba kuya kuba kokukhuseleke ngakumbi ukuhlala kwimimandla yasezidolophini okanye kwiidolophu ezincinane.

Kumaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile, uAbraham wafuduka kwikhaya lakhe elalilihle eUre ukuze afeze izilangazelelo zikaThixo. (Genesis 12:1; Hebhere 11:8) Ngokufanayo namhlanje, ezinye iintsapho zamaNgqina kaYehova ziye zafudukela kwimimandla apho kukho imfuneko yabashumayeli abangakumbi besigidimi soBukumkani. (Mateyu 24:14) Abanye baye baqalisa ukuya kumabandla aselumelwaneni apho kukho imfuneko yabaveleli okanye izicaka zolungiselelo. Ngoxa imfuduko enjalo isenokungathethi ukutshintsha indawo ohlala kuyo, ithetha ukuziqhelanisa neqela elitsha labantu neemeko ezintsha.

Nokuba siyintoni na isizathu sokuba intsapho yakowenu ifuduke, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ubungathandi njalo. Kuyaqondakala ukuba usenokungakuvuyeli ngokupheleleyo oko.

Ukungaqiniseki

Akuthethi kuthi yonke into eyimfuduko ayilunganga. UJustin oneminyaka eli-12 ubudala uyanyakama xa ekhumbula ikhaya lakhe langaphambili esixekweni esikhulu. Uthi: “Kwakusoyikeka. Kwakukho ugonyamelo oluninzi elumelwaneni lwethu. Wawungenakuhamba umgama oziiyadi [oziimitha] ezingama-50 ukusuka ekhaya ungakhange ucinge ngokuhlaselwa ngamaqela eenjubaqa. Abantu babehlala bezitshixele ezindlwini zabo. Ndandiyithiyile loo nto. Xa ndafumanisa ukuba sasiza kufudukela emaphandleni, ndavuya gqitha.”

Sekunjalo, xa ucinga ngokushiya abahlobo bakho neendawo oziqhelileyo kusenokukushiya ungaqinisekanga. UAnita oselula wavakalelwa ngolo hlobo xa waqonda ukuba intsapho yakowabo yayiza kufuduka. Ukhumbula oku: “Ndandichithe inkoliso yobomi bam kwiziko lamajoni aseUnited States eNgilani. Ndandizigqala ndingumntu waseBritani kungekhona umntu waseMerika. Xa ndandineminyaka elishumi ubudala, ndafumanisa ukuba utata uza kutshintshelwa eUnited States, eNew Mexico—ntlango yakwabani! Ekuqaleni ndandingakwazi emandikucinge. Ndandichulumancile kodwa ndandinexhala. Ndandingafuni ukushiya abahlobo bam. Oko kwaba yeyona nto imbi kwimfuduko.”

Isizathu Sokuba Ukufuduka Kubangele Uxinezeleko

Namhlanje, abantu ababonakala bengamaxhoba akhethekileyo oxinezeleko lwemfuduko ngabaselula. IReader’s Digest ithi: “Iingcali kwizigulo zengqondo zisixelela ukuba kwanokufuduka okugqalwa njengokuphucuka kubuhlungu yaye kubangela uxinezeleko ngokweemvakalelo.”

Phakathi kwezinye izinto, uchulumanco nolindelo lokufuduka ezo zinto nje zizodwa zibangela uxinezeleko. Ukubambezeleka nokutshintshatshintshwa kwexesha lokufuduka zinto ezo ezingenakuphetshwa zinokongezelela kuxinezeleko. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ukulindela okubanjezelweyo kubulala intliziyo.” (IMizekeliso 13:12) Kwanaxa wonk’ ubani ekhangele phambili kuko, iphephancwadi iParents lithi, “ukufuduka kusenokubangela ukukhathazeka nexhala elikhulu kumalungu entsapho. Oku kungenxa yokuba ukubuliswa kuba uhamba kuvuselela iimvakalelo zokulahlekelwa nokungaqiniseki ngoko kukulindeleyo ngaphambili.” Ngoko kuqhelekile ukuba neemvakalelo ezibuhlungu—ukothuka, umsindo, unxunguphalo kwanokudandatheka.

IThe Teenager’s Survival Guide to Moving ithi: “Ukufuduka kuthetha okungakumbi kunokutshintsha nje indawo ohlala kuyo. Kuthetha ukutshintsha iinkalo ezininzi eziyintloko zobomi bakho—isikolo ofunda kuso, abafundisi-ntsapho bakho, izinto obuqhele ukuzenza, abahlobo bakho. Yaye ukutshintsha kusoloko kunzima, kwanokuba olo tshintsho luza kuba yingenelo.” Unontlalo-ntle uMyra Herbert uchaza ukuba ukufuduka rhoqo kusenokuphumela “kwintsilelo nakunxunguphalo.” Phakathi kwezinye izinto, abantwana abafuduka kakhulu “basoloko betshintsha iinkqubo zesikolo yaye ngokukodwa ukuba ukufunda kunzima kubo, ekuhambeni kwexesha bayayeka ukufunda.” Ukushiya abahlobo ngasemva, uthi, “kunzima ngokukodwa” kulutsha.

Ukuhlangabezana Nokufuduka

Ngoko, kulula ukubona isizathu esinokubangela ukuba ukufuduka kusenokukwenza uqumbe, ucaphuke okanye ube nomsindo. Nokuba kunjalo, ukugxininisa kwiimvakalelo ezilandulayo kuya kwenza kuphela izinto zibe nzima ngakumbi. Kulunge ngakumbi ukuba uzame ukuhlakulela imbono elungileyo. Iimvakalelo ezilandulayo, njengexhala okanye ukukhathazeka, zizinto eziqhelekileyo phantsi kwezi meko. Ngokuqhelekileyo ezi mvakalelo ziyaphela ekuhambeni kwexesha. Okwangoku, zama ukumilisel’ ingqondo kwiingenelo zokufuduka.

UAnita, okhankanywe ngaphambilana, ngoku uneminyaka eli-15 ubudala ibe uphinde wafuduka. Ukhumbula oku, “Xa ndandifuduka, ndandikhathazekile. Kodwa ke ndacinga ngezinto eziyingenelo—zokuba ndandiza kudibana nabantu abatsha ndize ndiye kwiindawo ezibangel’ umdla.” Wonwabile yaye uphila kakuhle kwikhaya lakhe elitsha.

Maxa wambi, phezu kwayo nje imigudu yakho elungileyo, iimvakalelo ezilandulayo zisenokuzingisa. Ukuba kunjalo, musa ukuzityeshela. Ngaphezu koko, “umoya odakumbileyo” unokukwenzakalisa emzimbeni. (IMizekeliso 17:22) Mhlawumbi kufuneka unikel’ ingqalelo engakumbi ekuphumleni, ekwenzeni umthambo okanye utye ukutya okufanelekileyo. Kwangaxeshanye, kusenokufuneka uthethe ngeemvakalelo zakho, ngokukodwa nabazali bakho. (IMizekeliso 23:26) Benze bakwazi oko kukukhathazayo noko kukuxhalabisileyo.

Ngokomzekelo, ngaba udandathekile kuba kufuneka wahlukane nezinto ozixabisileyo ngenxa yokuba ‘kungekho ndawo yaneleyo yokuzibeka’? Okanye ngaba uvakalelwa kukuba nifuduke sele zisondele kakhulu iimviwo zesikolo ibe oko kuza kukucinezela kakhulu? Nokuba siyintoni na isikhalazo sakho, IMizekeliso 13:10 isikhumbuza oku: “Ngokukhukhumala kuvuka ukulwa kuphela; ubulumko bunabavuma ukucetyiswa.” Abazali bakho basenokuvuma ukuhlengahlengisa. Ukuba akunjalo, ubuncinane, basenokuvelana nawe, bakuxhase baze bakomeleze.

Musa ukuvumela amarhe namabali oyikisayo ngekhaya lakho elitsha atyhafise imigudu yakho yokulondoloza isimo sengqondo esilungileyo. IMizekeliso 14:15 ithi: “Isiyatha sikholwa ngamazwi onke; onobuqili uyakuqonda ukunyathela kwakhe.” Zifumanisele izibakala eziyinyaniso. UAnita uthi: “Ndaya kumzi wogcino-ncwadi ndaza ndaphanda ngemvelaphi nebutho labantu lendawo esafudukela kuyo.” Mhlawumbi usenokutyelela kwikhaya elitsha kwangaphambi kwemfuduko ukuba awufudukeli kwindawo ekude kakhulu. Oku kusenokukunceda kakhulu ekwaneliseni amathandabuzo akho kuze kwenze ingqondo yakho ilungele imfuduko.

Kuyavunywa ukuba ukufuduka akusayi kuba lula. IThe Teenager’s Survival Guide to Moving ithi, “Ngaphambi kokuba ufuduke, tyelela iindawo ozithandayo okokugqibela . . . , uze uzibone okokugqibela.” Usenokuthanda ukwenza ialbham yeefoto okanye incwadi ukuze uhlale uzikhumbula. Okubaluleke nangakumbi, zinike ixesha lokubulisa abahlobo bakho. Baqinisekise ukuba ulwalamano lwenu aluphelanga. Umpostile uYohane wasebenzisa ‘iphepha neinki’ ukuze agcine unxibelelwano nabo wayebathanda, nawe unokwenjenjalo! (2 Yohane 12) Ngozimiselo nangomgudu, kwanobuhlobo phakathi kwabantu abahlulwe yimigama emide bunokomelela.

Ekuhambeni kwexesha iinyembezi zakho zokuhamba ziya koma, yaye uya kujamelana nocelomngeni lokuziqhelanisa nekhaya lakho elitsha—nto leyo engumxholo wenqaku lethu elilandelayo.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 11]

Kutheni ungaphandi kusengaphambili uze ufunde ngekhaya lakho elitsha?