Ukunceda Ulutsha Lwanamhlanje
NAMHLANJE ulutsha lukhulela kwihlabathi eloyikisayo maxa wambi. Olunye kulo lubukela abazali balo besahlukana okanye beqhawul’ umtshato, lube lungenakwenza nto. Olunye lufunda nabantwana abasebenzisa kakubi iziyobisi nabazizaphuli-mthetho. Uninzi kulo lujamelana nengcinezelo evela kolunye yokuba neentlobano zesini. Yaye phantse lonke olufikisayo lukhe luvakalelwe kukuba aluqondwa, lube ngamalolo luze luxinezeleke.
Yintoni efunekayo ukuze ulutsha lukwazi ukujamelana nocelomngeni oluphambi kwalo? UGqr. Robert Shaw ubhala athi: “Abantwana bafuna impembelelo enamandla, isiseko esinokubanceda bakhethe abahlobo abafanelekileyo, benze izigqibo ezizizo baze babe novelwano ngabanye.” IBhayibhile ineyona mpembelelo inamandla, kuba ineengcamango zoMdali. Ngubani onolwazi ngaphezu kukaYehova uThixo ngendlela yokuhlangabezana namaxesha amanqam esiphila kuwo?
Ukhokelo Olusengqiqweni Nolusebenzisekayo
Imigaqo yeBhayibhile isengqiqweni yaye iyasebenziseka. Ingabanceda gqitha abazali nabanye abantu abakhulileyo abafuna ukunceda ulutsha lube ngabantu abakhulileyo abaphumelelayo.
Ngokomzekelo, iBhayibhile iyichaza kakuhle into yokuba “ubudenge bubotshiwe entliziyweni yenkwenkwe,” okanye ngokutsho kweToday’s English Version, “abantwana benza ubudenge ngalo lonke ixesha.” (IMizekeliso 22:15) Olunye ulutsha olufikisayo lusenokubonakala luqolile kuneminyaka yalo, kodwa alukabi namava. Xa lunjalo, lusesichengeni seminqweno neemvakalelo eziyinxalenye yokukhula kwalo. (2 Timoti 2:22) Lunokuncedwa njani ke olu lutsha?
IBhayibhile ikhuthaza ukuba kubekho ukuncokolisana okuqhubekayo phakathi kwabazali nabantwana. Inikela esi sibongozo kubazali: ‘Uthethe ngayo [imilinganiselo kaThixo] ekuhlaleni kwakho endlwini yakho, nasekuhambeni kwakho ngendlela, nasekulaleni kwakho, nasekuvukeni kwakho.” (Duteronomi 6:6, 7) Oko kuncokolisana kunceda ngeendlela ezimbini. Okokuqala, kufundisa oselula ngendlela zikaThixo. (Isaya 48:17, 18) Okwesibini, kwenza abazali nabantwana basoloko benento yokuncokola. Oku kubaluleke gqitha njengoko abaselula beqhubeka neminyaka yabo yokufikisa, kuba basenokuba neentloni baze babe ngamalolo.
Kambe ke, inkoliso yolutsha olufikisayo lukhe luzive lungamalolo. Kodwa ke, olunye lusoloko lungamalolo. Enye intyilalwazia ephathelele ulutsha olufikisayo ithi: “Aba bantwana bathi kunzima kubo ukwenza abahlobo esikolweni, akukho mntu banokuthetha naye, baziva bengamalolo, kunzima ukuzenza bathandwe ngabanye abantwana, yaye abanamntu banokuya kuye xa befuna uncedo.”
Abazali nabantu abakhulileyo abanenkxalabo banokubonisa umdla kulutsha baze baluncede lumelane neengxaki olunazo. Njani? Umhleli oyintloko wephephancwadi lolutsha ubhala athi: “Ekuphela kwendlela yokufumanisa okuqhubekayo kwiingqondo zolutsha kukulubuza. Licacile elokuba, kufuna ixesha nokuba nomonde ukuze uncede abaselula batyhile izinto ezibaxhalabisayo. Kodwa oko kuba nemivuzo emihle.—IMizekeliso 20:5.
Kufuneka Babekelwe Imida Esengqiqweni
Ukongezelela ekuncokolisaneni, ulutsha lukufuna ngamandla ukubekelwa imida esengqiqweni. IBhayibhile ithi “inkwenkwe eyekelelwayo iya kumhlazisa unina.” (IMizekeliso 29:15) Iingcali zivakalelwa kukuba ukungabekwa kwemida ecacileyo kunokuba ngunobangela wobunjubaqa bolutsha. OkaShaw ocatshulwe ngaphambilana uthi: “Ukuba umntwana uvuliwe nje ukuba enze unothanda abe engamazi ‘uhayi,’ soze ayazi into yokuba abanye abantu bayaphila, baneemvakalelo yaye banezabo iimfuno. Ukuba umntwana akalufundiswanga uvelwano, akanakuze abe naluthando.”
UGqr. Stanton Samenow, osebenze iminyaka emininzi nolutsha oluneengxaki, uthetha into efanayo. Ubhala athi: “Abanye abazali bavakalelwa kukuba abantwana bafanele bayekwe benze into abayithandayo. Bengakhathali, bacinga ukuba ukubeka imiqathango kuya kuthi zinzi umthwalo ongeyomfuneko kubantwana babo kuze kubenze bangabunandiphi ubuntwana babo. Kodwa ukungabeki kwabo imida kubangele imiphumo eyingozi. Aba bazali abayiqondi into yokuba inkwenkwe okanye intombazana engaqeqeshwayo soze ibhadle.”
Ngaba oku kuthetha ukuba abazali bamele babe ngqongqo? Akunjalo. Ukubeka imida yenye inkalo yokuqeqesha. Ukuba izinto ziyabaxwa, ukubeka imithetho engekho bhetyebhetye kunokwenza kungabi mnandi ekhaya. IBhayibhile ithi: “Nina boyise, musani ukubacaphukisa abantwana benu, ukuze bangadakumbi.”—Kolose 3:21; Efese 6:4.
Ngoko ke, rhoqo, abazali kufuneka bahlole iindlela abafundisa nabaqeqesha ngazo, ingakumbi njengoko abantwana babo bekhula yaye bebonisa ukuqola. Mhlawumbi imigaqo nemida ethile banokuyinyenyisa kuxhomekeka ekuqoleni komntwana lowo.—Filipi 4:5.
Ukwakha Unxibelelwano
Njengoko sibonile kwinqaku elingaphambili, iBhayibhile yaxela kusengaphambili ukuba ehlabathini kwakuya kubakho “amaxesha amanqam ekunzima ukujamelana nawo,” ngaphambi kokuba uThixo aqalise ukutshayela ubungendawo ehlabathini. Ubungqina bubonisa ukuba siphila kwelo xesha kanye—‘imihla yokugqibela’ yale nkqubo yezinto ingahloneli Thixo. Kanye njengabantu abakhulileyo, ulutsha luwa luvuka luzama ukuphila kwihlabathi elinabantu ‘abazithandayo, abangenawo umsa wemvelo, nabangenakuzeyisa.’—2 Timoti 3:1-5.b
Abazali abavakalelwa kukuba baye baphuncukana nomntwana wabo ofikisayo banokuqala ukwakha unxibelelwano kunye naye, ngokuthi baqale kancinane ukuncokola naye. Iyancomeka into yokuba abazali abaninzi bezama ngamandla ukuba lukhuthazo baze babe ngabahlobo abasenyongweni babantwana babo.
IBhayibhile isesona sixhobo sibalulekileyo kulo mbandela. Iye yanceda abazali abaninzi baphumeza imbopheleleko yabo yaza yanceda ulutsha lwaphepha imigibe eyingozi. (Duteronomi 6:6-9; INdumiso 119:9) Ekubeni iBhayibhile ivela kuMdali, uYehova uThixo, sinokuqiniseka ukuba inikela olona ncedo lukumgangatho ophezulu kulutsha lwanamhlanje.c
[Imibhalo esemazantsi]
a Kwale ntyilalwazi ithi, ngokwahlukileyo kulutsha oluba ngamalolo ngamaxesha athile, olo lusoloko lungamalolo luvakalelwa ngolo hlobo ixesha elide. “Lucinga ukuba ukungabi namhlobo yinto engapheliyo engalawulwayo nento ebangelwa sisiphako onaso” yaye “loo nto ayisayi kuze itshintshe.”
b Bona isahluko 11 sencwadi ethi Ulwazi Olukhokelela Kubomi Obungunaphakade, epapashwe ngamaNgqina kaYehova.
c AmaNgqina kaYehova aye afumanisa ukuba incwadi esekelwe eBhayibhileni enomxholo othi Imibuzo Yabantu Abaselula—Iimpendulo Eziluncedo iluncedo kakhulu. Isahluko ngasinye kwezingama-39 ezikuyo siphendula umbuzo oxhokonx’ iingcinga. Eminye imixholo yezo zahluko ithi: “Ndinokuzenzela Njani Abahlobo Bokwenene?” “Ndinokuhlangabezana Njani Nengcinezelo Yoontanga?” “Ndinokubuphelisa Njani Ubulolo Endinabo?” “Ngaba Ndikulungele Ukwenza Amadinga?” “Kutheni Ndimele Ndizichase Nje Iziyobisi?” “Kuthekani Ngokuba Neentlobano Zesini Ngaphambi Komtshato?”
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 10]
Thetha nomntu okhulileyo onenkathalo ngezinto ezikuxhalabisayo