Katuka wa finda komesho ngeenge ohombo oya teka
MARK,a oo a hengana pa pita odula okwa ti: “Onda li ndi udite nda fa nda wa komulunga. Oinima oya li tai ende nawa monghalamwenyo, ndele ombadilila oya lunduluka.”
EMMELINE, oo a hengana pa pita omido 17 okwa ti: “Omushamane wange okwa li a ya moluhaelo nomukainhu wepupi lomonakadona wetu. Eshi twa hengana, onda li nda pepelelwa nokumanguluka ko kehandu laye lii ashike onda li nda fya ohoni nondi udite ndihe na oshilonga.
Ovanhu vamwe ohava hengana tava diladila kutya onghalamwenyo yavo otai kala iwa, ofimbo vamwe va hala okukala mohombo ndele itava dulu okufininika ookaume kavo va kalele ohombo. Ndele nande ongaho, konyala keshe umwe oo a hengana oha mono kutya onghalamwenyo konima yaasho ohai naipala shi dulife osho a li a teelela. Ngeenge opo wa hengana, otashi dulika u udite kutya osho oshinima shidjuu neenghono osho ino shakeneka nande onale. Osha fimana okuyandja elitulemo komayele amwe taa longo oo a dja mOmbibeli, oo tashi dulika e ku kwafele opo u dule okuungaunga nomupondo nomashongo e na sha neteyohombo.
ESHONGO 1: OMALIUDO MAI.
Okulipula nomaupyakadi e na sha noimaliwa, okukala omudali nokukala u udite owike otaku dulu okukuwilila po nomaliudo oo ihaa di po diva. Omuxungimwenyo a li ko nale wedina Judith Wallerstein okwa mona kutya konima yomido dokuteka kwohombo, vamwe ohava kala natango ve udite va fa va kengelelwa, va efwa po, ve udite kutya “onghalamwenyo kai li pauyuki, va nyemata nove udite owike.”
OSHO U NA OKUNINGA PO
Lila molwaashi owa kanifa sha. Otashi dulika u kale wa djuulukwa kaume oo u hole natango. Nonande ekwatafano leni kala li liwa, otashi dulika u nyike oluhodi molwaashi ku na ehafo olo wa li wa teelela okukala u na ngeenge owa hombolwa. (Omayeletumbulo 5:18) Ino fya ohoni “efimbo lokulila.” — Omuudifi 3:1, 4.
Henuka okukala we litongola. Nonande ou na okukala to lili oove auke, kashi li pandunge okulitongola efimbo lile. (Omayeletumbulo 18:1) Kaleni hamu kundafana eenghundafana tadi tungu nookaume koye, molwaashi ngeenge owa kala alushe ho tanguna kombinga yakaume koye kopahombo wonale, nonande nokuli oshili pauyuki, otashi dulu okweehenifa vamwe kokule naave. Ngeenge ou na okuninga omatokolo a fimana diva konima eshi ohombo ya teka, konga ekwafo kuumwe oo we lineekela.
Kala u na ko nasha noukolele woye. Okulipula shi na sha netekohombo luhapu ohashi etele ovanhu omaupyakadi opalutu, ngaashi ohonde ya londa nomutwe woshipwataula. Lya oikulya ya wana, ninga omadeulo nokukala ho kofa sha wana. — Ovaefeso 5:29.
Kufa mo oinima oyo hai ku ningifa u kale wa handukila oo a li nale kaume koye kopahombo ile oyo ino pumbwa, ashike tuvikila omikanda odo da fimana. Ngeenge oinima ngaashi omafano ohango ohae ku nyikifa oluhodi, a tula moshipakete opo a ninge ounona voye.
Kondjifa omadiladilo a puka. Olga, oo a teya ohombo eshi omushamane waye a ya kondje yohombo, okwa ti: “Onda kala handi lipula kutya, ‘Oshike osho omukainhu oo e na ndihe shi na?’” Olga lwanima okwa ka mona kutya, okukala ta endulula omadiladilo a puka otaku mu twala ‘momhepo ya teka,’ ile tu tye metekomukumo. — Omayeletumbulo 18:14.
Ovanhu vahapu ohava mono kutya okushanga omadiladilo avo ohaku va kwafele va xwepopaleke nokupangela omadiladilo avo. Ngeenge owa ningi ngaho, kendabala opo u ete po omadiladilo mawa a pingene po oo mai. (Ovaefeso 4:23) Tala koihopaenenwa ei ivali:
Omadiladilo mai: Aame ndi na epuko eshi kaume kange kopahombo a ya moluhaelo.
Omadiladilo mawa: Omapuko ange hao e na okuningifa kaume kange kopahombo a ye kondje yohombo.
Omadiladilo mai: Onda hepeka omido dange diwa ndi li nomunhu a puka.
Omadiladilo mawa: Ohandi ka kala nda hafa ngeenge onda kala handi tale komesho ndele hamonima.
Ino yandja elitulemo komatyekosha oo taa yahameke. Ookaume novapambele ovo tava monika ve ku lile po otashi dulika va popye oinima oyo tai yahameke ile nokuli ihe li mondjila shi na sha naave ngaashi kutya: ‘Ka li e ku wapalela,’ ile ‘Kalunga oku tonde oteyohombo.’b Ombibeli oya yandja omayele omolwetomheno liwa ya ti: “Ino dimbulukwa eendjovo adishe tadi popiwa kovanhu.” (Omuudifi 7:21) Martina oo a teya ohombo pa pita omido mbali, okwa ti: “Ponhele yokukala handi lipula neendjovo odo tadi yahameke, ohandi kendabala okutala ko oinima pataleko laKalunga. Omadiladilo aKalunga oku dule etu neenghono.” — Jesaja 55:8, 9.
Ilikana kuKalunga. Kalunga ota ladipike ovapiya vaye opo ve mu ‘dike oshisho shavo,’ unene tuu ngeenge ve li moudjuu munene. — 1 Petrus 5:7.
KENDABALA OKUNINGA NGAHA: Shanga eevelishe dOmbibeli odo u wete kutya otadi ku kwafele, ndele to di tula ponhele opo to dulu oku di tala alushe. Kakele komishangwa odo da etwa mo nale, ovanhu vahapu ovo va teya ohombo ohava mono ouwa meevelishe edi: Epsalme 27:10; 34:18; Jesaja 41:10; Ovaroma 8:38, 39.
Efa Eendjovo daKalunga di ku kwafele u pite momafimbo madjuu
ESHONGO 2: EKWATAFANO LOYE NAKAUME KOPAHOMBO WONALE.
Juliana oo a li a hombolwa pa pita omido 11, okwa ti: “Onda li nda indila omushamane wange opo tuha hengafane. Ndele lwanima eshi a ka henga nge po, onda li nde mu handukila nomukainhu oo a ya kuye.” Ovanhu vahapu ovo hava hengana ohava kala va handukila ookaume kavo kopahombo vonale oule womido. Ashike peemhito dimwe ohava fininikwa va kwatafane alushe, unene tuu ngeenge ove na ounona.
OSHO U NA OKUNINGA PO
Kala u na ekwatafano liwa nakaume koye kopahombo wonale. Yukifa elitulemo loye koinima oyo ya fimana, shi ninga pauxupi nopehe na okwoongaonga. Vahapu ova mona kutya osho ohashi xumifa komesho ombili. — Ovaroma 12:18.
Henuka elaka la honga. Ngeenge ou udite wa ponokelwa nomalaka, oto dulu okutula moilonga omayele opandunge Ombibeli oo taa ti: “Ou ta pangele eendjovo daye, ye e neshiivo.” (Omayeletumbulo 17:27) Ngeenge ito dulu okutwikila eenghundafana odo uhe udite nawa, oto dulu okutya: “Ohandi ka diladila manga kombinga yaasho wa popya ndele handi uya tu popye lwanima.”
Tukula ko oinima yoye kwaayo yakaume koye kopahombo wonale ngaashi to dulu, mwa kwatelwa oinima yopaveta, yopaunamiti nosho yo oimaliwa.
KENDABALA OKUNINGA NGAHA: Shimha wa shakene nakaume koye kopahombo wonale, lungamena onghedi omo to linyenge ile mukweni tashi dulika to liamene ile ino hala okutifuka. Ngeenge otashi shiiva, pula u dje po okafimbo ile mu udafane mu longife o-e-mail opo mu kundafane kombinga yasho. — Omayeletumbulo 17:14.
ESHONGO 3: KWAFELA OUNONA VOYE VA TAMBULE KO ONGHALO.
Maria ota dimbuluka monghalo omo a li konima eshi a hengana a ti: “Okamonakadona kange aka kanini oka li haka kala taka kwena alushe nokuhovela okuxuxwila vali. Nonande omonakadona wange oo a kula okwa li ta kendabala okuholeka omaliudo aye, onda li ndi wete kutya naye onghalo oye mu kuma.” Shinyikifa oluhodi, otashi dulika u kale udite kutya owa pumbwa efimbo ile eenghono dopamaliudo opo u kwafele ounona voye ngeenge ve ku pumbwa neenghono.
OSHO U NA OKUNINGA PO
Ladipika ounona voye va popye naave shi na sha nomaliudo avo, nokuli nonande otashi dulika va popye ‘eendjovo da puka.’ — Job 6:2, 3.
Twikila okudana onghandangala ya fimana. Ofimbo tashi dulika wa pumbwa eyambidido lopamaliudo nounona voye otashi dulika va hala oku li ku pa, inashi yuka nokashi na oukolele u va pule ve ku kwafele momaupyakadi oye oo a pamba ovakulunhu. (1 Ovakorinto 13:11) Henuka okukala we likolelela mounona voye ile u va efe va kale omupokati ile omutumwa pokati keni nakaume koye kopahombo wonale.
Onghalamwenyo younona voye nai kale ya unganekwa nawa. Ngeenge omwa kala monhele omo mwa kala nokukala mu na elandulafano lokuninga oinima pamwe otashi ke mu kwafela, ndele osho sha fimanenena okukala hamu ningi oinima yopamhepo pandjikilile, ngaashi elesho lOmbibeli nelongelokalunga loukwaneumbo. — Deuteronomion 6:6-9.
KENDABALA OKUNINGA NGAHA: Shilipaleka ounona voye kutya ou va hole nonokutya havo va teya ohombo yeni. Nyamukula omapulo avo nopehe na okupa omudali mukweni ombedi.
Oto dulu okukatuka wa finda komesho nonghalamwenyo yoye ngeenge ohombo oya teka. Melissa oo a kala mohombo omido 16, okwa ti: “Eshi nda hengana, onda li nde lipopila handi ti: ‘Eshi hasho nda li nda hala ngeno onghalamwenyo yange i endele nge.’” Ndele paife okwa wanenwa nonande oku li meenghalo da tya ngaho. Okwa ti, “Eshi nda efa po okukendabala okulundulula onakudiwa yange, onda li ndi udite nawa unene.”
a Omadina aa a longifwa moshitukulwa eshi hao ovanhu ovo lelalela.
b Kalunga oku tonde eteyohombo olo la kwatela mo oukengeleledi ile eteke. Ndele ngeenge kaume kopahombo umwe okwa i moluhaelo, Kalunga okwa pitika kaume oo ehe na ondjo a tokole ngeenge ota teya ohombo ile hasho. (Malakia 2:16; Mateus 19:9) Tala oshitukulwa shi na oshipalanyole “The Bible’s Viewpoint — What Kind of Divorcing Does God Hate?” mo-Awake! yomafiku 8 Februali 1994, ya nyanyangidwa kEendombwedi daJehova.
LIPULA KUTYA . . .
Mbela onda lila ngoo shili sha wana omolwetekohombo?
Ongahelipi handi dulu okukala inandi handukila vali oo a li nale kaume kange kopahombo?