Bainetu Byo Bakonsha Kutana Lusekelo

KUZHOKOLOKA mwaya ntanda yonse lelo jino, banabakazhi bavula baji pa makito. Mu byalo byanonka, kibelengelo kya banabakazhi baji pa makito kijitu pamo na kya banabalume. Mu byalo biyanji, javula banabakazhi bakoyoka bingi kwingila mingilo ya mu majimi pa kuba’mba bamone mwakukwashisha bisemi byabo.

Banabakazhi bavula bengila pabiji, aku na kukeba mali a kwikwashishamo aku na kukeba kusunga kisemi byabo. Bano banabakazhi kechi bamonatu mali a kupotamo kajo, bivwalo ne a nzubo ne, bino bateka ne kajo, kuchapa bivwalo ne kuwamisha pa nzubo.

Kununga pa bino, bainetu bena Kilishitu bebikako bingi kufunjisha baana babo bya kwikala na bulunda bwawama ne Lesa. Inetu umo wa baana babiji babakazhi, aye Cristina waitabizhe’mba, “kwambatu kine, kechi kyapela kwingila nkito kabiji ne kwingila mingilo ya kulama kisemi, kikatakata umvwe uji na baana babacheche ne. Kechi kyapela kubila baana bintu byonse byo bakeba ne.”

Ki ka kilengela bainetu kukeba kutwela nkito? Makatazho ka o batalañana nao? Nanchi kijitu bulongo inetu kutwela nkito kuba’mba atane lusekelo nyi?

Ene Mambo Bainetu o Batwelela Nkito

Bainetu bavula bakeba bingi kwingila nkito. Bamo kechi baji na mulume wa kwibakwashako kumona mali a kwikwashishamo ne. Bakwabo baji mu masongola nabo bamona’mba mali afola muntu umo kechi akonsha kwibakwasha mu bintu byonse bikebewa mu kisemi ne.

Pano bino, kechi bainetu bonse bengila nkito na mambo a kukeba mali a kukwashishamo kisemi ne. Bavula bengila makito na mambo a kukeba kwisangajika abo bene. Bamo bengila na mambo a kukeba kwikala na mali a kupotamo bintu byo bakeba abo bene kwa kubula wa kwibakalakanya ne. Bavula bengila bingi bulongo pa nkito kabiji bamwenamo bingi lusekelo.

Kintu kikwabo kilengela bainetu bamo kutwela nkito, ke na mambo a kuchina kwibaseka ku bakwabo. Nangwa kya kuba bantu bavula betabizha’mba bainetu baji pa makito kimye kyonse bekala na bijikila kabiji ne kukoka bingi, aba babula kukeba kutwela nkito bebalengulula ne kwibendeleka bingi. Mwanamukazhi umo waambile’mba, “kechi kyapela kubula bakwenu amba ‘ñingilatu mingilo ya pa nzubo ne.’ Bantu bamo bamwesha mu ñambilo ne mwekanyikilo ya kilungi kyabo amba, ubena kutayatu kimye kyobe.” Rebeca uji na mwana wa mukazhi wa myaka ibiji waambile’mba: “Nangwa kya kuba bantu bayukishatu kuba’mba bainetu bafwainwa kusunganga baana babo, ndanguluka namba bainetu babula kwingila nkito bebamona kwikala bantu bapanshi bingi.”

Bubela ne Bwine Bukine

Mu mapunzha amo a panopantanda, byambo byambiwa pa mwela ne mu mapepala a byambo bikala bya kuba’mba “mwanamukazhi walumbuluka” ke yewa ubena kwingila bulongo pa nkito—kufola muzema wa mali, kuvwala kipale kabiji wabula kuketekela mu muntu. Umvwe wafika pa nzubo, uji na bulume bwa kupwisha makatazho a baana, kolola bilubo bya mwatawanji kabiji ne kuyuka mwa kubila na lukatazho luji lonse lwa kisemi. Pano bino, bainetu baji bino, ke bachechetu.

Javula nkito itwela banabakazhi, ke yoya ileta mukose kabiji kechi ya kufolapo ne mali a ntaka ne. Bainetu baji pa makito bafichishiwa bingi ku muchima na mambo a kuba ayo nkito yabo yo bengila kechi ibena kwibalengela kwingijisha busendwe bwabo ne. Buku wa Social Psychology wamba’mba: “Nangwa kya kuba kyambiwa kuba’mba kechi pafwainwa kwikala lupusano pakachi ka banabalune ne banabakazhi mu bya makito ne, banabalume bakitwajijila kwingila nkito yapeulu ya kufola mali avula. Banabakazhi beketekela abo bene na mambo a nkito yabo yo bengila, bekala bingi na bijikila.” Pepala wa byambo wa El País mu kyalo kya Spain waambile’mba: “Kyatanyiwa kuba’mba banabakazhi bekala bingi na bijikila kukila banabalume, mambo banabakazhi bavula bengila pabiji—ku nkito ne pa nzubo.”

Banabalume byo Bakonsha Kukwasha Bakazhi Babo

Kikale inetu mwina Kilishitu ukeba kutwela nkito nangwa ne, kiji koaji mwine. Pano bino umvwe wasongolwa, aye ne mwatawanji bafwainwa kuba bino kanatu bakisambapo ne kumona buwame ne butame bujimo.—Byambo bya Mana 14:15.

Pano ibyepi umvwe kya kuba na mambo a buyanji, bamulume ne mukazha bamona’mba bonse babiji bafwainwa kutwela nkito? Umvwe kyaikala bino, mwanamulume wa maana wafwainwa kulondela mukambizho wa mu Baibolo wa kuba’mba: ‘Anweba banabalume, byonkabyo, ikalai ne bakazhi benu monka mu maana, ne kumunemeka mwanamukazhi nobe kijilo kyakila kikwabo mu kubula kukosa, byo muji banswanyi pamo ba bupe bwa bumi.’ (1 Petelo 3:7) Mwanamulume umwesha munema ku mukazhanji kupichila mu kuyuka papelela bulume bwanji bwa kwingila ne bwa kulanguluka. Umvwe ke kikebewe, wafwainwa kukwashako mukazhanji mingilo ya pa nzubo. Byonka byajinga Yesu, mwanamulume wafwainwa kwingila mingilo ya pa nzubo na muchima yense, kechi kwiimona nobe ya panshi ileta bumvu ne. (Yoano 13:12-15) Umona ino mingilo kwikala jishuko ja kumwesheshamo butemwe ku mukazhanji wabambakana pa nzubo. Mukazhanji naye ukasanchila bingi mwatawanji pa buno bukwasho.—Efisesa 5:25, 28, 29.

Kwambatu kine, kumvwañana kukebewa bingi ku bamulume ne mukazhi umvwe bakeba’mba bonse batwele nkito. Kino kishinka kyaambiwepo ne mu pepala wa byambo wa ABC mu Spain. Kwamba pa kupesapesa kwaubiwe na kipanyi kya Institute of Family Matters, kibaba mwajinga uno sawakya kyaambile’mba, masongola avula apwa mu kyalo kya Spain, kechi apwatu na mambo a “kubula kulondela mizhilo ya bupopweshi ne ya byubilo byawama ne,” bino kuji ne bintu bikwabo bibiji bialengela kupwa—“kutwela kwa banabakazhi makito ne banabalume nabo kubula kukwashako bakazhi babo mingilo ya pa nzubo.”

Mwingilo Wanema wa Inetu Mwina Kilishitu

Nangwa kya kuba bashetu bo bene Yehoba bo apa mwingilo wa kufunjisha baana, bainetu bena Kilishitu bayuka’mba nabo bapewako lubaji kulatampe lwa kwibafunjisha—kikatakata umvwe mwana ukiji mucheche. (Byambo bya Mana 1:8; Efisesa 6:4) Yehoba waambijilenga bashetu ne bainetu byo akambizhenga bena Isalela kufunjisha baana babo Mizhilo yanji. Wayukile kuba’mba, uno mwingilo ukakebewanga kimye kikatampe ne kutekanya, kikatakata umvwe mwana watendeka kukoma. Onkao mambo, Lesa wakambizhe bansemi kuba’mba bafwainwa kufunjishanga baana babo pa nzubo, pa kwenda mu jishinda, pa kubuka kabiji ne pa kulaala.—Mpitulukilo ya mu Mizhilo 6:4-7.

Mambo a Lesa aamba pa buneme ne mwingilo mukatampe wa bainetu byo aamba’mba: ‘kechi ukane bikufunjisha bainobe ne.’ (Byambo bya Mana 6:20) Pano bino, mwanamukazhi wasongolwa wafwainwa patanshi kukipuzha mwatawanji saka akyangye kwibabula baana mizhilo iji yonse. Bino, byonka byaamba kino kyepelo, bainetu baji na lūsa lwa kulenga mizhilo. Kabiji baana bomvwina mizhilo ya ku mupashi ne ya byubilo byawama ibafunjisha bainabo bakamwa Lesa, bamwenamo pakatampe bingi. (Byambo bya Mana 6:21, 22) Inetu uji na baana babiji, aye Teresa walumbulwile ene mambo o abujila kukeba kutwelela nkito. Waambile’mba: “Kukomesha baana bami kuba’mba bakengijilenga Lesa, ye mwingilo wanema bingi ye nekaika. Mbena kukeba kwingila uno mwingilo bulongo.”

Bainetu Baingijile Bulongo

Mfumu wa bena Isalela, aye Lemwela wamwenejilemo bingi mu kwingila bulongo kwaingilanga inanji. ‘Byambo byamufunjishe’ inanji ‘mu kumololako’ byanembwa kwikala lubaji lwa Mambo a Lesa anembeshiwa na mupashi. (Byambo bya Mana 31:1; 2 Timoti 3:16) Ndumbulwilo ya inanji yo alumbulwijilemo mwanamukazhi walumbuluka, ne luno ikwasha bingi banababalume kusala bulongo banabakazhi bafwainwa kwikala bena kwabo. Kabiji lujimuno lwa uno inanji lwa pa mambo a byubilo byatama ne kukizhamo kutoma malwa ne luno lukingila bingi byonkatu byo lwaingilanga kimye kitanshi kyo lwanembelwe.—Byambo bya Mana 31:3-5, 10-31.

Mu myaka kitota kitanshi, mutumwa Paulo watakaikile bingi mwingilo wawama waingijile inetu wa jizhina ja Yunisa wafunjishe mwananji, aye Timoti. Byo kiji kuba’mba mwatawanji wabujile kwitabila kampe wapopwelanga balesa ba Bangiliki, Yunisa wakebewenga kwitabisha Timoti kwikala na lwitabilo mu “binembelo byazhila.” Nga Yunisa watendekele kimye ka kufunjisha Timoti Binembelo? Jishimikila janembeshiwa na mupashi jaamba’mba, ‘kufumatu ku bwanyike,’ ko kuba’mba kufumatu kimye Timoti kyo ajinga lukeke. (2 Timoti 1:5; 3:14, 15) Lwitabilo lwanji, byubilo byanji kabiji ne mfunjishisho yanji, byo byakwashishe Timoti kwinengezha kwingila mwingilo wa bumishonale byo akomene.—Filipai 2:19-22.

Kabiji Baibolo waamba ne pa bainetu balengejile baana babo kwikala na byubilo byawama na mambo a kutambulwila bakalume bakishinka mu mazubo abo. Kya kumwenako, mwanamukazhi mwina Shunema watambwilanga ngauzhi Elisha mu nzubo yanji kimye kyonse. Palutwe kacheche, mwananji wamulume byo afwile, Elisha wamusangwile. (2 Bamfumu 4:8-10, 32-37) Akilangulukai ne pa kya kumwenako kya kwa Maliya inanja Mako, nembi wanembeleko Baibolo. Kyamweka wapaine nzubo yanji mu Yelusalema kwikala ya kupwilamo baana ba bwanga batanshi. (Byubilo 12:12) Kwa kubula nangwa kuzhinaukatu ne, Mako wamwenenjilemo bingi mu kupwanañana na batumwa ne na bena Kilishitu bakwabo baiyanga pa nzubo yabo kimye kyonse.

Kya kine, Yehoba wanemeka bingi mwingilo wa banabakazhi bakishinka bafunjisha baana babo mafunde anji. Wibatemwa bingi bano banabakazhi na mambo a bukishinka bwabo ne kwingila na ngovu kwabo kwa kukwasha ba mu nzubo yabo kunemeka bintu bya ku mupashi.—2 Samwela 22:26; Byambo bya Mana 14:1.

Mwingilo Uleta Lusekelo

Byonka byo twamona mu bya kumwenako biji mu Binembelo, kumwena ba mu kisemi bintu bikebewa ku mubiji, ku mupashi kabiji ne mu milanguluko, kuleta mfweto ikatampe. Pano bino, kuba bino kechi kyapela. Mwingilo wa inetu pa nzubo javula umweka kukosa bingi kukila ne wa pa kifulo kikatampe pa kapanyi.

Ee kine, umvwe inetu panyuma ya kwisamba na mwatawanji wafuukulapo kuleka nkito, kisemi kyafwainwa kwikela mu byonka byo kyakonsha kwikala nabyo, kabiji wafwainwa ne kuchinchika myendeleko ya boba bakonsha kubula kumvwisha ene mambo o alekela nkito. Pano bino, mfweto ifumamo yabaya bingi. Mwanamukazhi wa jizhina ja Paqui uji na baana basatu ukebatu kwingila mingilo ya kimye kicheche pa juba. Waambile’mba: “Nkeba bingi kutanwa pa nzubo umvwe baana bami bakotoka ku sukulu kuba’mba bekalenga na muntu wa kwisamba nabo.” Nga baana banji bamwenamo byepi? Waambile’mba, “nebakwashako mu mingilo yabo ya ku sukulu yo beya na kwingijila ku nzubo, kabiji umvwe paikala lukatazho, bukiji bukiji ngyuka mwakubila. Kimye kyo twikala pamo moba onse, kitulengela kwisambila pamo. Nanemeka bingi kwikala pamo na baana bami kya kuba nakaine ne kutwela nkito ya kuzhikisha juba.”

Bainetu bavula bena Kilishitu bekitana kuba’mba umvwe bakepeshako kimye kyo bengila nkito, bonse ba mu kisemi bamwenamo bingi. Cristina ye twajikwambapo waambile’mba, “byo nalekele kwingila nkito, namwene namba makatazho mu kisemi akepelengako. Naikalanga na kimye kya kwisamba na baana bami ne kukwashako bamwatawami mu bintu byavula. Natendekele kufunjisha baana bami babakazhi ne kumona byo bafunjilenga ne kuyilako palutwe.” Kuji kintu kimo kyo avuluka bingi Cristina. “Mwanami wamukazhi mubeji wafunjijile kwenda ku mpuzha ko twasungishanga baana byo najinga pa nkito, bino nafunjishe mwanami wa bubiji kwenda pa nzubo. Watamwine kulu kimye kitanshi ne kuponena mu maboka ami. Kino kintu kyandetejile bingi lusekelo!”

Kintu kikwabo kyafwainwa kulangulukwapo ke kya kuba’mba nangwa inetu waleka nkito, kechi kilumbulula’mba pano kisemi kisakuyanda ne. Cristina waambile’mba, “mali avula o nafolanga apwilangatu ko nasungishanga baana ne ku myotoka yo napatamangamo pa kuya ku nkito. Umvwe ketuvuluke pa nkito yo naingilanga, tumona kuba’mba kafwakotu ne mali a ntaka o twamwenangamo ne.”

Panyuma ya kumona bwikalo bwabo byo buji, bamo balangulukapo’mba buwame buji mu wamukazhi kwikala pa nzubo kimye kyonse bwakila bobwa bwa kwikala na mali avula. Mwatawanji Cristina aye Paul waambile’mba, “newalusekelo bingi pa kumona mukazhami byo abena kwikala pa nzubo na kulama baana betu babiji babacheche. Kitushupanga bingi kulama baana kimye kyo twakingilanga bonse nkito.” Nga kino kyakwashishe byepi bano baana babo? Paul waambile’mba,“kechi beumvwatu kuzhikijilwa konka ne, bino bavimbilwa bingi ne ku byubilo byatama kufumatu ku bwanyike bwabo.” Mambo ka bano bamulume ne mukazhi o balangulukila’mba kyanema bingi kwikala na baana babo kimye kyabaya? Paul wakumbula’mba: “Nasumininwa namba umvwe atweba basemi ketubule kutangijila michima ne milangwe ya baana betu, muntu ungi ukabikamo byanji.”

Bonse bamulume ne mukazhi bafwainwa kulanguluka pa bwikalo bwabo byo buji, kabiji kafwako wafwainwa kuseka bakwabo pa byo bafuukulapo kuba ne. (Loma 14:4; 1 Tesalonika 4:11) Nangwa byonkabyo, kyanema bingi kulanguluka pa bintu byawama byavula byo bamwenamo ba mu kisemi umvwe inetu ke abule kwingila nkito. Pa kupezhako pa byo eumvwa pa kino, Teresa ye twajikwambapo kala, waambile’mba: “Kafwako kintu kileta lusekelo kyakila pa kwikala na baana bobe ne kwibafunjisha obe mwine ne.”—Masalamo 127:3.

[Kipikichala pa peja 29]

Bainetu bena Kilishitu bengilako mwingilo wanema bingi wa kufunjisha baana babo