Fehagai mo Lautolu i Fafo he Magafaoa Tutaki Haau

Ne fehagai e tau magafaoa tututaki mo e tau fakafetuiaga kehe lahi ti fa paleko mo lautolu i fafo he magafaoa ha lautolu.b Laulahi he tau matua tututaki ka fehagai mo e taha matua he tama he tau paleko tuga e ahiahi atu, akonaki, mo e lalago fakatupe. Liga taufetului foki e tau kapitiga mo e tau magafaoa ke hikihiki ke he tau tagata he magafaoa foou. Manamanatu ke he puhala he fakatonuaga mai he Tohi Tapu ka lagomatai e magafaoa tututaki haau ke fehagai mo e tau paleko ia.

FAKAFETUIAGA 1: KO E TAHA MATUA FOKI HE TAMA

Ko e matua fifine tutaki i Namipia ne higoa ko Judith ne pehē: “Ko e matua fifine he tau tama tututaki haaku ne tala age ki a lautolu ko e hoana foou noa ni he matua taane ha lautolu au ti ka fai fanau a maua to nakai ko e tau lafu ha lautolu. Mamahi lahi au ke he tau kupu haana ha kua ofania e au e tau tama tututaki haaku ke tuga ni ko e tau tama haaku.”

Ne talia he tau tagata pulotu ko e fakafetuiaga he taha matua he tama ko e matakupu uka mo e mavehevehe ma e magafaoa tututaki. Fa mahani, ko e matua fifine mo e matua fifine tutaki ne fa uka lahi. Ko e heigoa ka lagomatai?

Ko e puhala ke kautū: Fakatoka e tau fakakaupāaga kua lata. Ka lali a koe ke nakai fakaatā mai e taha matua, to liga mamahi e logonaaga he tama haau.c Ko e tau matua he tama, ko laua ne ‘fanau ai a ia,’ ne uho lahi ke he moui haana. (Tau Fakatai 23:22, 25) He taha faahi, ka fakaatā e koe e hoa mau fakamua haau ke lahi e pule ke he magafaoa haau, to fakaita po ke fakahogohogo manava e koe e hoa foou haau. Eketaha ke lagotatai, he fakatoka e tau fakakaupāaga iloilo ke puipui e fakamauaga haau, ka e tumau ke kaufakalataha ke he taha matua ka maeke.

LAGOMATAIAGA MA E TAU MATUA

• Ka tutala a koe mo e hoa fakamua haau, hagaaki ke he fanau ha mua ti fakatote e fakatutala ke he falu matakupu. Ma e fakatai, liga hūhū fakailoilo a koe ka maeke ke fakatoka e magaaho ke hea telefoni tumau he aho. Fa gahua mitaki e mena ia ke he hea telefoni tumau po ke he tulotopō.

• Ka nakai ha ha ia koe e tonuhia ke leveki e tau tama haau, liga maeke a koe ke fakaaoga e tau hea telefoni, tau tohi, fakafano e fekau tohitohi he telefoni, po ke meli hila ke tumau e matutakiaga. (Teutaronome 6:6, 7) Falu ne fakaaoga foki e matutakiaga ke he vitiō. Maeke ia koe ke moua e lotomatala ke he tau fanau haau ti foaki e fakatonuaga mitaki ke lagomatai a lautolu.

LAGOMATAIAGA MA E TAU MATUA FIFINE TUTAKI

• Fakakite e “feofanaki” ke he matua fifine he tau fanau he fakamahino kua nakai lali a koe ke hukui a ia. (1 Peteru 3:8) Tala age tumau e tuaga he tau fanau ka haia e tau fanau mo koe, he hagaaki fakalahi ke he tau mena mitaki. (Tau Fakatai 16:24) Ole ma e fakatonuaga haana, ti fakaaue ki a ia ka foaki ai.

• Fakakaupā he fakakite e tau logonaaga mokoina ke he tau fanau ka ha ha i ai e matua fifine ha lautolu. Ko Beverly, ko e matua fifine tutaki he tau Faahi Kaufakalataha, ne pehē: “Ko e tau tama tutaki haaku ne manako ke hea au ko Mami. Ne talia a maua mo lautolu kua mitaki e mena nei he fale ha mautolu ka e nakai mitaki ka hea e lautolu au ko Mami ka haia a lautolu mo e ha lautolu a matua fifine ko Jane, po ke magafaoa haana. Ne matutaki mitaki au mo Jane he mole e mena nei. Ti gahua auloa a maua he tau gahua aoga mo e ō he tau fenoga kitekite.”

LAGOMATAIAGA MA E TAU MATUA MO E TAU MATUA TUTAKI KE FEMATAAKI

• Ua vagahau kelea hagaao ke he matua po ke matua tutaki ke logona he tau tama. Kua mukamuka ke mokulu ke he tutalaaga kelea pihia, ka e fakatupetupe lahi ke he tama. Ti nakai iloa e koe e puhala po ke magaaho ka fatiaki ai e tau kupu haau. (Fakamatalaaga 10:20) Ka pehē e tama kua vagahau kelea e taha matua po ke matua tutaki ki a koe, hagaaki ke he tau logonaaga he tama. Liga talahau e koe taha mena pehē: “Fakamolemole au kua logona e koe e mena ia. Ai fiafia e Mami haau ki a au, ti falu mogo ka ita e tau tagata ne vagahau e lautolu e tau mena nakai mitaki.”

• Lali ke tatai e tau matafakatufono mo e akonakiaga he tau magafaoa ne ua. Ka nakai maeke e mena nei, fakamaama e kehekeheaga ka e nakai ekefakakelea e taha matua. Manamanatu ke he mena ne tupu:

  Matua fifine tutaki: Fakamolemole ma Tim tau hake e tauela pala haau.

  Tim: He kaina ha Mami, na toka e mautolu he foloa ti tautau hake e ia.

  Matua fifine tutaki (ita): Na fakaako teva e ia a koe.

  To mitaki nakai e tali pehē?

  Matua fifine tutaki (totoka): Ae, mitaki. He fale nei na tautau ni e mautolu ha mautolu.

• Ua fakatoka e tau matagahua ma e tau fanau haau he magaaho ka haia a lautolu mo e taha matua. (Mataio 7:12) Ka nakai maeke a koe ke hiki e matagahua, moua e fakaatāaga mai he taha matua ato tala age ke he tau fanau e mena ne fakatoka e koe.

FAKAFETUIAGA 2: TAU FANAU LALAHI

Ko e tohi Step Wars ne futiaki e taha fifine ne hohohā ke he puhala ne fa kau e taane haana mo e tau tama lalahi haana ti fakaheu ke talahau kua taute fakakelea e lautolu a ia. “Ne mafiti lahi e ita haaku,” he ui e ia. Maeke fēfē a koe ke fakatumau e fakafetuiaga haau mo e tau tama lalahi ke ua moumou e fakamauaga haau?

Ko e puhala ke kautū: Fakakite e fai logonaaga. Pehē e Tohi Tapu: “Aua neke kumi e taha e mitaki hana ni, ka kia takitokotaha mo e kumi e mitaki he falu.” (1 Korinito 10:24) Lali ke maama mo e mailoga e tau logonaaga he taha tagata. Liga matakutaku e tau fanau lalahi ne tutaki neke galo e tau logonaaga fakaalofa he ha lautolu a matua. Po ke logona e lautolu ka fakafeleveia fakamitaki e lautolu e matua tutaki, to nakai fakamooli a lautolu ke he matua fanau ha lautolu. Ka ko e mogonei, liga tupetupe e tau matua ko e tutuhia e tau tama ha laua to omoi a lautolu ke he mafoa.

He nakai lali ke omoi e tuaga kapitiga, kia fakaatā e fakafetuiaga haau mo e tau tama tutaki haau ke tupu. He tau mena oti kua nakai pulotu ke lali ke fakaohooho po ke peehi e taha tagata ke he logonaaga fakaalofa mooli. (Lologo a Solomona 8:4) Ti lali ke fakatoka e tau amaamanakiaga iloilo mo e mooli ka hoko ke he fakafetuiaga tata mo e tau tama tutaki haau.

Ua talahau e tau mena oti kua manatu po ke logona e koe, kaeke ke ekefakakelea atu ki a koe. (Tau Fakatai 29:11) Ka uka ke tautaofi e puhala vagahau haau, liogi tuga e Patuiki ko Tavita i Isaraela: “Kia tuku e koe, Iehova na e, e leoleo ke he haku gutu, kia leveki e koe e gutuhala he haku tau laugutu.”​—Salamo 141:3.

Ka fifili a koe ke nofo he fale mo e tau tama ne feaki i ai, liga ofo lahi a koe ke he pipikiaga ne logona hifo agaia e lautolu. Lali ke fakatote e tau hikiaga, mua atu ke he tau poko tuai ha lautolu. Manamanatu foki a koe ke hiki atu ke he fale foou.

FAKAFETUIAGA 3: FALU MAGAFAOA MO E TAU KAPITIGA

Ko Marion ko e matua fifine tutaki i Kanatā ne ui: “Fa mahani e tau matua haaku ke age e tau mena fakaalofa ke he tama taane haaku ka e nakai ke he tau tama he taane haaku. Ne lali a maua ke fakatau ni e maua, ka ko e falu mogo ne nakai fāhia a maua.”

Ko e puhala ke kautū: Tuku fakamua e magafaoa foou haau. Tala age ke he magafaoa mo e tau kapitiga haau hagaao ke he fakamooliaga ke he magafaoa foou haau. (1 Timoteo 5:8) He nakai amanaki a koe ke fakaalofa mafiti mai e tau magafaoa oti mo e tau kapitiga ma e magafaoa foou, maeke a koe ke ole ki a lautolu ke totonu mo e nakai onoono hifo. Fakamaama e mamahi he fanau ka nakai fakakite ki ai e fakaalofa mo e falu mahani totonu.

Lali ke fakaatā e tau matua tupuna mai he fakamauaga fakamua haau ke fai vala he tau momoui he tau tama haau. Ko e matua fifine i Igilani ne higoa ko Susan ne ui: “Ne liu au fai taane he 18 e mahina he mole e mate he taane mua haaku, ti uka lahi e tau matua haana ke talia e taane foou haaku. Ne holo mitaki ai he putoia e maua a laua, he fakaatā e tau tama ke hea ki ai, ti fakaaue ki a laua ha ko e lalagoaga ha laua.”

Ko e fakafetuiaga mo lautolu i fafo he magafaoa haau ka paleko ke he magafaoa tutaki haau. Ka ko e fakagahua e fakatonuaga faka-Tohi Tapu, to moua he magafaoa haau e monuina ne mavehe he Tohi Tapu: “Kua ati hake ai e fale ke he iloilo; kua fakamau ai foki ke he pulotu.”​—Tau Fakatai 24:3.