Ungahlala Njani Uthabile Nange Utlhogomela Umuntu Olupheleko Namkha Ogulako?

1-2. UJehova uzizwa njani ngabantu abatlhogomela abantu abalupheleko namkha abagulako? (IzAga 19:17) (Qala neenthombe.)

UMFOWETHU we-Korea u-Jin-yeol uthi, “Mina nomkami sele sineminyaka engaphezu kwema-32 sitjhadile. Eminyakeni emihlanu edlulileko bengisolo ngimtlhogomela. Unobulwele obubizwa ngokuthi yi-Parknson obumenza kungabi lula ukusikinya umzimbakhe. Ngiyamthanda begodu uligugu kimi, ngiyakuthabela ukumtlhogomela. Qobe ebusuku, ulala embhedeni wesibhedlela osendlinethu. Ngilala eqadi kwakhe bese sibambane izandla.”

² Kghani ukhona umuntu omtlhogomelako omthandako njengombelethi, umuntu otjhade naye, umntwana namkha umngani? Nange kunjalo, kungenzeka uyalithabela ilungelo lokuthi usize umuntu omthandako. Wenza lokho ngebanga lokuthi uthanda uJehova. (1 Thim. 5:​4, 8; Jak. 1:27) Nanyana kunjalo, zinengi iintjhijilo ekungenzeka uqalana nazo abanye abangaziboni. Ngezinye iinkhathi ungazizwa ngasuthi nguwe wedwa ozwa ubuhlungu. Ungamomotheka nawuhlangana nabantu kodwana uzwe ubuhlungu bewulile nasele uwedwa. (Rhu. 6:6) Nanyana abantu bangakghoni ukubona iintjhijilo oqalana nazo, uJehova ubona koke oqalana nakho. (Madanisa no-Eksodusi 3:7) Iinyembezi zakho nokuzidela kwakho kuligugu khulu kuye. (Rhu. 56:8; 126:5) Ukubona koke okwenzako ukusiza umuntu omthandako. Uziqala njengomuntu okukolodako begodu uthembisa ukuthi uzokubhadela.—Funda izAga 19:17.

3. Ngiziphi iintjhijilo ekungenzeka u-Abrahama noSara baqalana nazo nabatlhogomela uTerarhi?

³ IBhayibheli lineendaba ezinengi zamadoda nabafazi ebebatlhogomela abanye. Cabanga ngesibonelo saka-Abrahama noSara. Ngesikhathi bakhamba e-Uri, uyise uTerarhi bekaneminyaka engaba ma-200. Nanyana besele aluphele, wakhamba nabo. Bakhamba ibanga elingaba makhilomitha ama-960 ukuya eHarana. (Gen. 11:​31, 32) Asizazi ukuthi u-Abrahama noSara bebamthanda uTerarhi kodwana ungacabanga ukuthi bekusitjhijilo kangangani ukumtlhogomela, khulukhulu njengombana bebasekhambweni labo. Kungenzeka bebakhamba ngamakamela namkha abodumbana, ekungenzeka bekubudisi kuTerarhi obekasele aluphele. Bekuzokuzwisiseka ukuthi ngezinye iinkhathi bazizwe badiniwe ngebanga lakho koke lokhu. Kunganandaba ukuthi bebaqalene nabuphi ubujamo, uJehova wabanikela amandla ebebawatlhoga. Njengombana uJehova akghona ukusekela u-Abrahama noSara nawe uzokusekela bekakuqinise.—Rhu. 55:22.

4. Sizokucoca ngani esihlokwenesi?

⁴ Ithabo lingakusiza ukghodlhelele njengomtlhogomeli. (IzA. 15:13) Khumbula ukuthi ungakghona ukuhlala uthabile nanyana ubujamo bokuphila bubudisi. (Jak. 1:​2, 3) Ungalifumana njani ithabo elinjalo? Enye indlela kuthembela kuJehova ngomthandazo begodu umbawe akusize uhlale unombono omuhle. Esihlokwenesi, sizokucoca ngezinto ezingeziweko labo abatlhogomela abantu abalupheleko namkha abagulako abangazenza bona bahlale bathabile. Sizokubona nokuthi abanye bangabasiza njani? Kokuthoma, akhesicoce ngokuthi kubayini abantu abatlhogomela abanye kutlhogeka bahlale bathabile nokuthi ngiziphi iintjhijilo ezingabaqedela ithabo.

KUBAYINI KUNGABA BUDISI UKUHLALA UTHABILE NAWUTLHOGOMELA UMUNTU OMTHANDAKO?

5. Kubayini abantu abatlhogomela abanye kufuze bahlale bathabile?

⁵ Nange bangakathabi, bangaphela amandla msinyana bebadinwe. (IzA. 24:10) Nabadiniweko kungaba budisi ukuthi babe nomusa begodu basize ngendlela abafuna ukusiza ngayo. Ngiziphi iintjhijilo abantu abatlhogomela abanye abangaqalana nazo ezingabenza baphelelwe lithabo?

6. Kubayini abanye abantu abatlhogomela abanye badinwa khulu?

⁶ Abantu abatlhogomela abanye bangazizwa badinwe khulu ukudlula indlela ejayelekileko. Udadwethu u-Leah uthi: “Ukutlhogomela umuntu kukwenza uzizwe unganamandla ngokwamazizo ngitjho nanyana kungasi lilanga elimbi. Nakuphela ilanga, awusakhanuki ukwenza litho. Ngezinye iinkhathi, angibi nomdlandlha wokuphendula umlayezo.” Abanye bakufumana kubudisi ukuphumula. Udadwethu u-Inés uthi: “Ngikufumana kubudisi ukulala ngokwaneleko. Ebusuku, ngivuka qobe ngemva kwama-iri amabili bona ngitlhogomele unosokanami. Begodu sinobabakwami sekuminyaka sagcina ukuzikhupha, siye emaholideyini.” Abanye abatlhogomela abagulako babhalelwa kukwamukela iimemo zokuya emibuthwaneni namkha ezabelweni zehlangano, ngebanga lokuthi kufuze batlhogomele abantu ababathandako ngaso soke isikhathi. Ngebanga lalokho, bangazizwa babodwa begodu bavalelekile ebujameni abaqalene nabo.

7. Kubayini abanye babatlhogomeli balwisana nokuzizwa bamlandu namkha bangasilisizo?

⁷ Abantu abatlhogomela abanye bangalwisana nokuzizwa bamlandu namkha bangasilisizo. Udadwethu u-Jessica uthi: “Ngilwisana nezinto engingakghoni ukuzenza. Nangizipha isikhathi sokuzitlhogomela, ngizizwa ngimlandu begodu ngimarhamaru.” Abanye bangatshwenyeka ngokuthi abakghoni ukusiza abantu ababathandako ngendlela abafuna ngayo namkha ngezinye iinkhathi bazizwe ngasuthi angekhe bakghone ukuragela phambili batlhogomela umuntu loyo. Ngezinye iinkhathi bazizwa badiniwe begodu bagcine sele batjho namkha benze izinto ezinganamusa. Koke lokhu kubenza bazizwe bangasibabantu abalungileko begodu kuyabadanisa. (Jak. 3:2) Abanye kubazwisa ubuhlungu ukubona umuntu obekaphilile, kancanikancani aba mumuntu ongasanapilo. Udadwethu u-Barbara uthi: “Isitjhijilo esikhulu engiqalana naso, kubona umuntu engimthandako aphelelwa yipilo kancanikancani ngebanga lokugula.”

8. Abanye bazizwe njani lokha abantu nababathokozako ngesizo labo?

⁸ Ngezinye iinkhathi abantu abatlhogomela abanye bangazizwa ngasuthi umsebenzi abawenzako awusililitho. Kubayini? Kungebanga lokuthi abantu abanengi ababathokozi namkha bababuke ngomsebenzi obudisi abawenzako kuhlanganise nokuzidela kwabo. Amezwi ambalwa wokuthokoza angenza umuntu otlhogomela abanye akhuthazeke. (1 Thes. 5:18) Udadwethu u-Melissa uthi: “Ngezinye iinkhathi, ngiyalila ngebanga lokuzizwa ngidanile. Kodwana umuntu engimtlhogomelako nakathi ‘Ngithokoza khulu ngakho koke ongenzela khona,’ kungenza ngithabe. Amezwi anjalo angenza ngibe namandla wokuragela phambili ngimtlhogomela nangelanga elilandelako.” Umfowethu u-Ahmadu uhlathulula ukuthi nakafumana amezwi amnandi kumenza azizwe njani. Yena nomkakhe batlhogomela umtjhanabo omncani ohlala nabo, onokugula bokuwa. Uthi: “Ngitjho nanyana kungenzeka angazwisisi ukuzidela esikwenzako bona simtlhogomele kodwana ngithaba khulu ehliziywenami nakaveza indlela asithokoza ngayo namkha nakatlola phasi ukuthi ‘Ngiyakuthanda.’”

UNGAHLALA NJANI UTHABILE?

9. Kubayini umtlhogomeli kufuze alemuke lapho amandlakhe aphelela khona?

⁹ Lemuka ukuthi khuyini ongayenza nongekhe ukghone ukuyenza. (IzA. 11:2) Asihlali sinesikhathi namandla wokwenza koke esifuna ukukwenza. Yeke, kufuze uqunte ukuthi khuyini okghona ukuyenza ngezinye iinkhathi, angekhe wakghona ukwenza lokho abantu abafuna ukwenze begodu kulungile ukwala ngezinye iinkhathi. Lokho kutjengisa bona uyalemuka ukuthi amandlakho aphelela kuphi. Nange kunabantu abafuna ukukusiza, lamukele isizo labo. Umfowethu u-Jay uthi: “Zimbalwa izinto esingakghona ukuzenza ngesikhathi sinye. Ukuzwisisa ukuthi amandlakho aphelela kuphi nokungenzi okungaphezu kwamandlakho kuzokusiza uhlale uthabile.”

10. Nawutlhogomela umuntu othileko khuyini okufuze uyizwisise? (IzAga 19:11)

¹⁰ Linga ukuzwisisa amabanga enza umuntu aziphathe ngendlela ethileko. (Funda izAga 19:11.) Nawuzwisisa lokho uzokukghona ukuhlala wehlise umoya lokha umuntu omthandako atjho namkha enza into enganamusa. Umuntu onelemuko ukghona ukuzwisisa ukuthi kubayini umuntu aziphathe ngendlela ethileko. Kuyazwisiseka ukuthi umuntu onokugula okuthileko ngezinye iinkhathi ukugulokho kungamenza enze izinto angakajayeli ukuzenza. (UMtj. 7:7) Ngokwesibonelo, umuntu ojayele ukukhuluma kuhle nonomusa kungenzeka aphikisane bekalwe nawe. Godu angathoma ukunghonghoyila ngezinto ezinengi namkha asilingeke. Kungaba kuhlakanipha ukufunda ngokugula okuphethe umuntu omsizako. Nawuzwisisa ukugula aqalene nakho, kuzokuba lula ukulemuka ukuthi lokho akutjhoko nakwenzako kubangelwa bujamo aqalene nabo, ingasi ngombana umumuntu onjalo.—IzA. 14:29.

11. Ngiziphi izinto eziqakathekileko abantu abatlhogomela abanye ekufuze benze isikhathi sazo qobe langa? (IRhubo 132:​4, 5)

¹¹ Yenza isikhathi sokuqinisa ubuhlobo bakho noJehova. Ngezinye iinkhathi kuzokutlhogeka ubekele ezinye izinto ngeqadi bona ube nesikhathi esaneleko sezinto “eziqakatheke khulu.” (Flp. 1:10) Ezinye zezinto eziqakatheke khulu kuqinisa ubuhlobo bakho noJehova. IKosi uDavida yenza ukulotjha uJehova kweza qangi ekuphileni kwayo. (Funda iRhubo 132:​4, 5.) Ngendlela efanako, kuqakathekile ukuthi qobe langa wenze isikhathi sokufunda iBhayibheli nokuthandaza. Udadwethu u-Elisha uthi: “Ngikghona ukuhlala ngithabile ngokuthi ngithandaze begodu ngicabangisise ngamarhubo aduduzako. Umthandazo ngiwo ongisiza khulu. Ngizifumana ngithandaza kuJehova phakathi nelanga bona ngihlale ngehlise umoya.”

12. Kubayini kuqakathekile ngalabo abatlhogomela abanye bona baziphe isikhathi sokuzitlhogomela?

¹² Bekela eqadi isikhathi sokuzitlhogomela. Abantu abamajadu njengabantu abatlhogomela abantu abagulako namkha abalupheleko bakufumana kubudisi ukutlhogomela ipilwabo njengokuthi badle ukudla okunepilo namkha bapheke ngebanga lokuthi kunengi khulu abakwenzako. Ukudla okunepilo nokuzibandula kuqakathekile, kuzokusiza umzimbakho namazizwakho. Yeke linga ukusisebenzisa kuhle isikhathi onaso bona udle ukudla okunepilo begodu uzibandule qobe. (Efe. 5:​15, 16) Ukungezelela kilokho, linga ukulala ngokwaneleko. (UMtj. 4:6) Abodorhodere abafunda ngeengqondo bathi nasilala ngokwaneleko ubuqopho bethu buyazivuselela. Isihloko esithi, “How Sleep Can Affect Stress,” esigadangiswe yiBanner Health, siveza ukuthi ukulala kuhle kuphungula ukugandeleleka bekusisiza sikghone ukuqalana nanyana ngibuphi ubujamo obugandelelako. Kutlhogeka nokuthi wenze isikhathi sezinto othabela ukuzenza. (UMtj. 8:15) Omunye omtlhogomeli uhlathulula lokho okumenza ahlale athabile. Uthi: “Ubujamo bezulu nabubuhle, ngilinga ukuya ngaphandle ngithabele ilanga. Okungenani kanye ngenyanga ngihlela ukuba nesikhathi esimnandi sokwenza engikuthandako nomnganami.”

13. Kubayini ukuhleka kuyinto ehle nenepilo? (IzAga 17:22)

¹³ Fumana izinto ezizokwenza uhleke. (Funda izAga 17:22; UMtj. 3:​1, 4) Nawuhleka uzizwa ungakagandeleleki khulu. Nawutlhogomela umuntu, esikhathini esinengi izinto kungenzeka zingakhambi kuhle kodwana nawuhleka ngobujamo obuthileko kuzokwenza ungasilingeki msinyana begodu nawuhleka nomuntu omtlhogomelako kuzokuqinisa ubungani benu nobabili.

14. Ukukhuluma nomngani omthembako kungakusiza njani?

¹⁴ Khuluma nomngani omthembako. Nanyana ungalinga ngamandla ukuhlala uthabile, ngezinye iinkhathi kuzoba kunengi khulu begodu uzokutshwenyeka. Ngebanga lalokho kungaba lisizo ukucoca nomngani omthembako ngendlela ozizwa ngayo, umuntu ongekhe akwahlulele namkha ozokwenza ngasuthi uyikhweza intaba. (IzA. 17:17) Ukukulalela kwakhe namezwakhe akhuthazako kungaba ngilokho okutlhogako bona uhlale uthabile.—IzA. 12:25.

15. Ukukhuluma ngePharadesi kungakusiza njani uhlale uthabile?

¹⁵ Zicabange usePharadesi nomuntu omthandako, omtlhogomelako. Linga ukukhumbula ukuthi indimakho yokutlhogomela ingeyesikhatjhana, akusimsebenzi uJehova ebekafuna wenziwe babantu. (2 Kor. 4:​16-18) “Ukuphila kwamambala” kuseza. (1 Thim. 6:19) Uzokufumana ithabo ngokukhuluma nomuntu omthandako ngalokho enizokuthabela ukukwenza ndawonye ePharadesi. (Isa. 33:24; 65:21) Udadwethu u-Heather uthi: “Ngihlala ngitjela abantu engibatlhogomelako bona ingasikade sizokuthabela ukuthunga ndawonye, sigijime besireye netsikiri ndawonye. Sizokubhaga uburotho besiphekele abantu esibathandako abavusiweko. Soke sizokuthokoza uJehova ngethemba esinalo.”

ABANYE BANGASIZA NJANI?

16. Singabasiza njani labo abatlhogomela abantu abagulako namkha abalupheleko abasebandleni lethu? (Qala nesithombe.)

¹⁶ Singasiza umfowethu namkha udadwethu afumane isikhathi sokwenza izinto azifunako. Thina esisebandleni singasiza umuntu otlhogomela olupheleko namkha ogulako ngokuthi simtlhogomelele yena ngezinye iinkhathi. Ngokwenza njalo, laba abatlhogomelako, bafumana ithuba lokuphumuza imikhumbulwabo begodu bakghona nokwenza izinto zabo abatlhoga ukuzenza. (Gal. 6:2) Abanye abafowethu nabodadwethu banerhelo lokuthi ngubani ozokuyokusiza qobe veke. Udadwethu u-Natalya, otlhogomela indodakhe erholopheleko, uthi: “Omunye umfowethu webandleni uza kanye namkha kabili ngeveke azokuba nesikhathi nobabakwami. Baya esimini bobabili, bacoce, bebabukele nama-movie. Iinkhathezi ziligugu khulu kubabakwami begodu lokho kunginikela ithuba lokobana ngikghone ukwenza izinto zami mathupha nokuthi ngiphume ngibetjhwe mumoya.” Ngezinye iinkhathi, ungabe ubawe ukuhlala ubusuku bunye ukwenzela bona loyo otlhogomelako akghone ukulala kamnandi.

17. Singabasiza njani labo abatlhogomela abagulako namkha abalupheleko ngesikhathi semihlangano yebandla?

¹⁷ Siza abatlhogomeli hlangana nemihlangano yebandla. Abantu abatlhogomela abanye kungatlhogeka basolo baphuma hlangana nemihlangano yebandla, imihlangano emncani nemikhulu ngebanga lokobana bamajadu ngokusiza abantu ababatlhogomelako. Labo abasebandleni bangabasiza ngokuthi bahlale nabo hlangana nemihlangano enjengale bona bakghone ukubasiza. Nange umuntu ogulako namkha osele aluphele angakghoni ukuphuma ngendlini, singabawa ukusala naye sithungelele imihlangano nge-inthanethi, ukwenzela bona umtlhogomelakhe akghone ukuya bunqopha emhlanganweni yebandla eWolweni lomBuso.

18. Khuyini enye esingayenzela abatlhogomeli?

¹⁸ Babuke ngomsebenzi omuhle abawenzako bewubathandazele. Abadala kufuze benze isikhathi sokukhuthaza labo abatlhogomela abagulako namkha abalupheleko. (IzA. 27:23) Soke ebandleni kufuze siragele phambili sitjela labo abatlhogomela abagulako namkha abalupheleko bona siyabathanda besibabuke ngomsebenzi omuhle abawenzako. Singabawa uJehova abaphe amandla bekabasize bahlale bathabile.—2 Kor. 1:11.

19. Khuyini esiqale phambili kiyo?

¹⁹ Ingasikade uJehova uzokusula iinyembezi zobuhlungu emehlweni wabo boke abantu. Ukufa nokugula angekhe kusabakhona. (IsAm. 21:​3, 4) “Abarholopheleko bazokweqayeqa njengeqina.” (Isa. 35:​5, 6) Ukudana okubangelwa kuluphala nobuhlungu bokutlhogomela labo abagulako kuzokuba yingcenye ‘yezinto zekuthomeni angekhe zisakhunjulwa.’ (Isa. 65:17) Ngitjho nanje, njengombana sisalinde ukuzaliseka kwethemba elihle esiqale phambili kilo, uJehova angekhe asilahle. Nange siragela phambili sithembela kuye bona asinikele amandla, uzosisiza ‘sikghodlhelele ngokupheleleko ngokubekezela nangethabo.’—Kol. 1:11.