Kodi Ndingatani Ngati Anthu Ena Akukonda Kunena za Ine?

Kunenedwa n’kopweteka

Anthu ena amanena zinthu zoipa zokhudza anzawo kapenanso kuwanenera mabodza n’cholinga chofuna kuwaipitsira mbiri. Munthu ukazindikira kuti anthu amene umawaona kuti ndi anzako amakunena, ngakhale zinthuzo zitakhala kuti si zoipa kwambiri, zimapweteka.—Salimo 55:12-14.

“Ndinazindikira kuti mnzanga ankandinena kuti ndimachita zinthu mosaganizira ena. Zinandipweteka kwambiri chifukwa sindinkayembekezera kuti iyeyo angamandinene choncho.”—Ashley.

Mfundo yoona: Zimapweteka ukazindikira kuti anthu ena amanena zinthu zoipa zokhudza iweyo, kaya anthuwo akhale anzako a pamtima kapena ayi.

Simungapeweretu kunenedwa

Anthu akhoza kunena anzawo pa zifukwa zosiyanasiyana monga izi:

Kukhala ndi chidwi. Anthufe timasangalala tikamacheza ndi anzathu. Choncho mwachibadwa timalankhulana komanso kulankhula za anthu ena. Ndipotu Baibulo limatilimbikitsa kuti ‘tiziganizira ena.’—Afilipi 2:4.

“Nkhani yosangalatsa kwambiri kukambirana ndi yokhudza anthu ena.”—Bianca.

“Kunena moona mtima, ineyo ndimayesetsa kuti ndidziwe zimene zikuchitikira anthu ena. Ndipo ndikadziwa, ndimakondanso kuuzako ena. Sindidziwa kuti n’chifukwa chiyani ndimakonda zimenezi koma zimangondisangalatsa.”—Katie.

Kusowa chochita. Kalekale, anthu ena ankakonda “kuthera nthawi yawo yonse yopuma akufotokoza kapena kumvetsera nkhani yatsopano.” (Machitidwe 17:21) Masiku ano anthu ena amachitanso zimenezi.

“Anthu akasowa chochita, nthawi zina amayamba kupeka nkhani n’cholinga choti apeze cholankhula.”—Joanna.

Kudzikayikira. Pofuna kutithandiza, Baibulo limatichenjeza kuti tizipewa kudziyerekezera ndi ena. (Agalatiya 6:4) N’zomvetsa chisoni kuti anthu ena amene amadzikayikira, amafalitsa zinthu zabodza zokhudza anthu ena.

“Anthu amene amakonda kunena zinthu zoipa zokhudza anthu ena nthawi zambiri amakhala akuchitira nsanje munthuyo. Iwo amafalitsa zinthu zabodza n’cholinga choti azidziona kuti iwowo ndi abwino kuposa munthu amene akumunenayo.”—Phil.

Mfundo yoona: Kaya mufune kapena musafune, anthu azilankhulabe za inuyo kapena za anthu ena.

Musamakhumudwe nazo kwambiri

N’zoona kuti palibe chimene mungachite kuti anthu asiyiretu kunena za inu koma mungasankhe zimene mungachite mukamanenedwa. Ngati mutadziwa kuti anthu akufalitsa mabodza okhudza inuyo, pali zinthu ziwiri zimene mungachite.

1: Mukhoza kungozisiya. Nthawi zambiri zimakhala bwino kungozisiya makamaka ngati nkhaniyo si yaikulu kwenikweni. Mungagwiritse ntchito malangizo a m’Baibulo akuti: “Usamafulumire kukwiya mumtima mwako.”—Mlaliki 7:9.

“Anthu anayamba kufalitsa kuti ndinali pachibwenzi ndi mnyamata winawake woti sindinakumanepo naye. Zinandiseketsa kwambiri moti ndinangozisiya.”—Elise.

“Ngati munthu uli ndi mbiri yabwino sudandaula. Ngakhale anthu atafalitsa zinthu zoipa zokhudza iweyo, ndi anthu ochepa kwambiri amene angakhulupirire. Ndipo pamapeto pake zoona zake zimadziwika.”—Allison.

Yesani izi: Lembani (1) zimene zinanenedwa zokhudza inuyo ndi (2) mmene zinakukhudzirani. Mukalankhula “mumtima mwanu” mmene mukumvera, zimakhala zosavuta kungozisiya.—Salimo 4:4.

2: Mukhoza kulankhula ndi munthu yemwe wayambitsa nkhaniyo. Nthawi ina zimapezeka kuti anthu akufalitsa nkhani yaikulu yokhudza inuyo. Pamenepa mungachite bwino kulankhula ndi munthu amene anayambitsa nkhaniyo.

“Kulankhula ndi anthu amene anayambitsa nkhaniyo kungathandize anthuwo kudziwa kuti mumamva zimene amakunenani. Komanso kungathandize kuti zoona zake za nkhaniyo zidziwike kenako n’kuthetsa mabodzawo.”—Elise.

Mungachite bwino kuganizira mfundo za m’Baibulo zotsatirazi komanso kudzifunsa mafunsowo musanakalankhulane ndi munthu amene amakunenani.

• “Munthu aliyense woyankhira nkhani asanaimvetsetse n’ngopusa.” (Miyambo 18:13) ‘Kodi ndikudziwa zonse zokhudza nkhaniyi? Kodi munthu amene wandiuza kuti ndimanenedwayu anamvetsadi zimene anthuwo amanena?’

• “Munthu aliyense akhale wofulumira kumva, wodekha polankhula, wosafulumira kukwiya.” (Yakobo 1:19) ‘Kodi ino ndi nthawi yoyenera kulankhula ndi munthu amene amandinenayu? Kodi zimene ndikufuna kuchitazi ndi zoyenereradi? Kapena kodi ndikufunika kudikira kaye kuti mtima wanga ukhale m’malo?’

• “Zinthu zonse zimene mukufuna kuti anthu akuchitireni, inunso muwachitire zomwezo.” (Mateyu 7:12) ‘Zikanakhala kuti ineyo ndi amene ndimamunena munthuyu, kodi ndikanafuna kuti andilankhule bwanji? Kodi ndikanakonda kuti andilankhule pamalo otani? Kodi ndikanakonda kuti andilankhule mawu otani komanso kuti nkhope yake izioneka bwanji?’

Yesani izi: Musanakalankhule ndi munthu amene amakunenani, lembani zimene mukufuna mukanene. Kenako dikirani kwa mlungu umodzi kapena iwiri, werenganinso zimene munalembazo ndipo muone ngati mukufunika kusintha zina ndi zina. Mungachitenso bwino kukambirana ndi makolo anu kapena mnzanu woganiza bwino kuti akupatseni malangizo.

Mfundo yoona: Kunenedwa kuli m’gulu la zinthu zimene simungazipeweretu pa moyo wanu. Koma zimenezi sizikutanthauza kuti palibe chomwe mungachite.