IGICE CYA 25

Ese nagira ibyishimo kandi nderwa n’umubyeyi umwe?

“Abana bafite ababyeyi bombi, buri wese aba afite icyumba cye n’imyenda mishya. Ariko jye nta cyumba cyanjye ngira kandi sinigeze nambara imyenda nshaka. Mama avuga ko ihenda. Aho kwishimisha nk’abandi, mfite imirimo ngomba gukora mama yagiye ku kazi, ku buryo numva ndi nk’umugaragu.”—Shalonda, ufite imyaka 13.

KUGIRA ababyeyi bombi nta ko bisa. Iyo umugore n’umugabo bafatanyije kurera, abana barushaho kurerwa neza, bakarindwa kandi bakabona ibyo bakeneye. Bibiliya igira iti “ababiri baruta umwe, kuko babona ibihembo byiza by’imirimo yabo.”—Umubwiriza 4:9, Bibiliya Yera.

Nubwo ari uko bimeze, imiryango ifite ababyeyi babiri iragenda igabanuka cyane. Urugero, abana basaga kimwe cya kabiri muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika, barerwa n’umubyeyi umwe mbere y’uko bagira imyaka 18.

Nubwo ababyeyi barera abana ari bonyine basigaye ari benshi, hari abakiri bato benshi baterwa ipfunwe n’uko badafite ababyeyi bombi. Hari n’abandi bumva badashobora kwihanganira ibibazo n’imihangayiko baterwa n’ubwo buzima. Ese niba urerwa n’umubyeyi umwe, ni ibihe bibazo ujya uhura na byo? Andika hasi aha ikibazo kiguhangayikisha kurusha ibindi.

․․․․․

Ese kuba hari umwe mu babyeyi mutari kumwe ngo agukunde kandi akwiteho igihe cyose, bishatse kuvuga ko utazigera wishimira ubuzima? Oya, kubura ibyishimo ahanini biterwa n’uko ubona imimerere urimo. Mu Migani 15:15 hagira hati “iminsi yose y’imbabare iba ari mibi, ariko ufite umutima unezerewe ahora mu birori.” Nk’uko uwo mugani ubivuga, kubabara cyangwa kwishima ahanini biterwa n’uko ubona ibintu. None se wakora iki kugira ngo ugire “umutima unezerewe,” nubwo waba urerwa n’umubyeyi umwe?

Icyo wakora mu gihe ufite agahinda

Ikintu cya mbere ukwiriye kwirinda, ni ukurakazwa n’uko hari ukubwiye ikintu gishobora kukubabaza. Urugero, hari nk’abarimu bavuga bahubutse amagambo yo guserereza abanyeshuri badafite ababyeyi bombi. Ndetse hari n’abatekereza ko abana bitwara nabi, babiterwa no kuba barerwa n’umubyeyi umwe. Ushobora kwibaza uti ‘ese abambwira aya magambo baranzi neza? Ese bazi umuryango wanjye? Cyangwa baba basubiramo ibyo bumvise abandi bavuga ku birebana n’abana barerwa n’umubyeyi umwe?’

Ni iby’ingenzi kuzirikana ko ijambo “imfubyi” riboneka incuro nyinshi muri Bibiliya. Nta na rimwe iryo jambo rijya rikoreshwa rigamije kugira uwo ritesha agaciro. Mu nkuru hafi ya zose iryo jambo ryakoreshejwemo, Yehova agaragaza ko yita mu buryo bwihariye ku bana barerwa n’umubyeyi umwe.a

Icyakora, hari abantu bamwe na bamwe bashobora kujya bifata cyane mu biganiro mugirana, ariko mu by’ukuri batabitewe n’ubugome. Urugero, hari igihe bashobora kwirinda gukoresha amagambo nk’aya ngo “papa,” “ishyingiranwa,” “gutana” cyangwa “urupfu,” batinya ko ayo magambo yakubabaza cyangwa se akagutera ipfunwe. Ese ibyo nawe bijya bikubabaza? Niba bijya bikubabaza, babwire ubigiranye amakenga ko badakwiriye kugira impungenge. Umuhungu witwa Tony, ufite imyaka 14, ntiyigeze amenya se. Yavuze ko iyo yaganiraga n’abantu maze bakanga gukoresha amagambo amwe n’amwe, yahitaga akomeza ikiganiro kandi agakoresha ayo magambo bangaga kuvuga. Yaravuze ati “nashakaga ko bamenya ko ntaterwa ipfunwe n’imimerere ndimo.”

Irinde gutekereza uko byari kuba bimeze

Birumvikana ko hari igihe uzajya wumva ufite agahinda cyangwa se ubabaye, kubera ko ababyeyi bawe batanye cyangwa se umwe mu babyeyi bawe yapfuye. Nubwo ari uko bimeze, ukwiriye kwihanganira ibyakubayeho. Bibiliya itanga inama igira iti “ntukavuge uti ‘kuki iminsi ya kera yari myiza kurusha iy’ubu’” (Umubwiriza 7:10)? Umukobwa witwa Sarah w’imyaka 13 ufite ababyeyi batanye afite imyaka 10, yaravuze ati “ntugahore utekereza ku mibereho yawe wibaza uko ubuzima bwari kuba bumeze iyo uza kuba ubana n’ababyeyi bombi. Ntugahore wumva ko ibibazo ufite biterwa n’uko udafite ababyeyi bombi, cyangwa ngo wumve ko abana barerwa n’ababyeyi bombi ari bo babayeho neza.” Iyo ni inama nziza cyane. N’ubundi kandi, imiryango ifite ababyeyi bombi na yo hari ibibazo ihura na byo.

Ngaho sa n’ureba abagize umuryango wawe bameze nk’abasare bafite ingashya batwaye ubwato. Ubusanzwe ubwo bwato bugomba kuba bufite abasare bahagije. Ariko kubera ko mu muryango wanyu haburamo umusare umwe, birasaba ko abasigaye bakoresha imbaraga nyinshi. Ese ibyo bishatse kuvuga ko mutazagera iyo mujya? Oya rwose. Abagize umuryango wanyu nibakomeza kugashya bafatanyije, ubwato bwanyu ntibuzarohama ahubwo muzarangiza urugendo rwanyu neza.

Ese usohoza inshingano yawe?

Ese ni ikihe kintu wakora ufatanyije n’abagize umuryango wawe, cyatuma babona ko usohoza inshingano yawe? Reka dusuzume ibintu bitatu bikurikira:

Jya urondereza. Kubona amafaranga ni cyo kibazo gikomeye kurusha ibindi mu miryango ifite umubyeyi umwe. Wakora iki? Tony twigeze kuvuga yaravuze ati “abanyeshuri twigana basaba ababyeyi babo kubagurira inkweto n’imyenda bigezweho. Iyo batabibonye ntibaza no ku ishuri. Jye nambara imyenda iciriritse ariko ifite isuku, kandi mfata neza iyo mfite. Kubera ko nzi neza ko mama nta ko aba atagize, simba nshaka kumurushya.” Nawe ushobora gukora uko ushoboye ukigana intumwa Pawulo wavuze ati “nitoje kunyurwa mu mimerere yose naba ndimo.”—Abafilipi 4:11, 12.

Ubundi buryo bwo kurondereza ni ukwirinda gusesagura ibyo ufite (Yohana 6:12). Hari umusore witwa Rodney wavuze ati “iyo ndi mu rugo nditwararika kugira ngo ntagira ibyo nangiza cyangwa mena, kuko nzirikana ko kubisana byadutwara amafaranga menshi. Nzimya amatara cyangwa ngacomokora ibikoresho bikoresha amashanyarazi igihe tutabikoresha, kugira ngo tugabanye amafaranga twishyura umuriro.”

Fata iya mbere. Ababyeyi benshi barera abana bonyine, ntibakunda gutanga amategeko mu rugo cyangwa ngo babwire abana babo kubafasha imirimo yo mu rugo. Biterwa n’iki? Hari bamwe bumva ko bagomba kuziba icyuho cy’undi mubyeyi udahari, bityo bigatuma barera bajeyi. Bashobora kwibwira bati ‘sinshaka kwibabariza abana.’

Nawe utabaye maso ushobora kugwa mu mutego wo kwishimira ko umubyeyi wawe akurera atyo. Uramutse ubyemeye waba ubereye umubyeyi wawe umutwaro aho kumuruhura. None se, kuki utakwiyemeza kamufasha imirimo yo mu rugo atiriwe abigusaba? Nimucyo dusuzume icyo Tony yiyemeje gukora. Yaravuze ati “kubera ko mama akora kwa muganga, itaburiya ye igomba guterwa ipasi. Ubwo rero ndayimuterera. Nubwo hari bamwe batekereza ko uwo ari umurimo w’abagore, jye ndabikora kuko mba nshaka kumufasha.”

Jya umushimira. Uretse gufasha umubyeyi wawe mu mirimo, ushobora no kumutera inkunga umubwira amagambo yo kumushimira. Hari umubyeyi urera abana wenyine wanditse ati “hari igihe njya numva nacitse intege cyangwa se hari ikibazo nahuye na cyo ku kazi, maze nataha ngasanga umukobwa wanjye yatetse, atangiye no gutegura ameza. Umuhungu wanjye na we araza akampobera.” Ibyo bituma uwo mubyeyi yumva ameze ate? Yaravuze ati “numva nongeye kugarura ubuyanja.”

Andika hasi aha ikintu wifuza kunonosora kurusha ibindi, muri ibyo bitatu tumaze kuvuga. ․․․․․

Kuba ufite umubyeyi umwe biguha uburyo bwo kwitoza umuco wo kugira impuhwe, kutikunda no kuba umuntu wizerwa kandi ushoboye. Nanone kandi, Yesu yaravuze ati “gutanga bihesha ibyishimo kuruta guhabwa” (Ibyakozwe 20:35). Nawe uzagira ibyishimo byinshi niwitanga ugafasha umubyeyi wawe.

Birumvikana ariko ko utazabura kujya wifuza ko wagira ababyeyi bombi. Icyakora ushobora kumenya uko wakwishimira imimerere urimo. Uko ni ko umukobwa witwa Nia yabigenje. Yaravuze ati “papa amaze gupfa, hari umuntu wambwiye ati ‘aho werekeza ubuzima bwawe ni ho buzajya.’ Ayo magambo nakomeje kuyazirikana. Yatumye numva ko imimerere ndimo itagombye gutuma mbura ibyishimo.” Nawe ushobora kurangwa n’icyizere nk’uwo mukobwa. Zirikana ko imimerere urimo atari yo ituma ugira ibyishimo cyangwa ngo ubibure. Ahubwo biterwa n’uko ubona iyo mimerere urimo n’icyo uyikoraho.

KU BINDI BISOBANURO, REBA UMUBUMBE WA 1, IGICE CYA 4

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]

UMURONGO W’IFATIZO

“Umuntu wese muri mwe areke kwizirikana ubwe gusa, ahubwo azirikane n’abandi.”​—Abafilipi 2:4, Bibiliya Ijambo ry’Imana.

INAMA

Niba ubona ko wahawe ibintu byo gukora birenze ubushobozi bwawe, saba umubyeyi wawe kugerageza gukora ibi bikurikira:

● Gukora urutonde rw’imirimo yose yo mu rugo n’abazajya bayikora.

● Guha abagize umuryango imirimo bashoboye gukora.

ESE WARI UBIZI . . . ?

Kugira ibintu ugomba kwitaho mu rugo, bigufasha gukura vuba kurusha abakiri bato bafite ababyeyi bombi, ariko badakunze kugira icyo bakora iwabo.

ICYO NIYEMEJE GUKORA

Dore icyo nzakora kugira ngo ntakomeza kubabazwa n’imimerere ndimo: ․․․․․

Nimbona abantu banyitwararikaho cyane, dore uko nzababwira: ․․․․․

Icyo nifuza kubaza ababyeyi banjye kuri iyi ngingo ni iki: ․․․․․

UBITEKEREZAHO IKI?

● Kuki hari abantu bagirira urwikekwe abana barezwe n’umubyeyi umwe?

● Kuki umubyeyi wawe ashobora gutinya kugusaba ngo umufashe mu mirimo yo mu rugo?

● Washimira ute umubyeyi wawe?

[Amagambo yatsindagirijwe yo ku ipaji ya 211]

“Kuva ababyeyi banjye batana, jye na mama dukunda kuganira kandi twabaye incuti magara.”—Melanie

[Ifoto yo ku ipaji ya 210 n’iya 211]

Umuryango uyobowe n’umubyeyi umwe ni nk’ubwato bubura umwe mu basare. Abasare basigaye baba basabwa kugashya bakoresheje imbaraga nyinshi. Kandi iyo bafatanyije, bagera iyo bajya