Ko e Ngaahi Tenge ki he Toʻutupu he ʻAho Ní

KO E TUʻUNGA TALAVOÚ—naʻa mo e ʻi he malumalu ʻo e ngaahi tuʻunga lelei tahá—ʻe lava ke hoko ia ko ha taimi taʻemanonga. Lolotonga ʻa e kamata ke hoko ko e tokotaha lahí ʻoku ʻohofi ai ʻa e fānaú ʻe he ngaahi ongoʻi mo e ngaahi fakaueʻiloto foʻou. ʻOku nau fehangahangai mo e ngaahi tenge fakaʻaho mei he kau faiakó mo e ngaahi toʻumeʻá. ʻOku nau eʻa atu ki he tākiekina taʻemotu ʻa e TV, ngaahi faivá, ko e faʻu mūsiká pea mo e ʻInitanetí. ʻOku fakamatalaʻi ai ʻe ha līpooti mei he Ngaahi Puleʻanga Fakatahatahá ʻa e tuʻunga talavoú ko “ha vahaʻa taimi ia ʻo e liliu ʻoku fakamatalaʻi anga-maheniʻaki ʻa e loto-mafasia mo e loto-moʻua.”

Ko hono pangó, ʻoku faʻa ʻikai ʻaupito taukei ʻa e toʻutupú ke fakaleleiʻi ʻa e loto-mafasiá mo e loto-moʻuá ʻi ha founga ola lelei. (Palovepi 1:4) ʻI he ʻikai ha tataki totonú, ʻe lava ke nau tōngofua ki he ngaahi tōʻonga fakatupu ʻauha. Ko e fakatātaá, ʻoku pehē ʻe he līpooti ʻa e UN: “ʻOku fakahaaʻi ʻi he fakatotoló ko e kamata ʻo e ngāuehalaʻaki ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú ʻoku faʻa hoko ia lolotonga ʻa e tuʻunga talavoú pe hoko ko ha tokotaha lahí.” ʻOku lava ke leaʻaki ʻa e meʻa tatau ki he ngaahi tuʻunga kehe ʻo e anga-koví, hangē ko e fakamālohí mo e fehokotaki fakasino fakaʻaluʻalú.

Ko e ngaahi mātuʻa ʻoku nau tukunoaʻi ʻa e ngaahi meʻa peheé ʻo pehē ʻoku hoko ia ʻi he lotolotonga pē ʻo e “kau masivá” pe ʻi he ngaahi kulupu fakafaʻahinga paú ʻoku faʻa fakamoʻoniʻi ʻoku nau fehālaaki ʻi he tuʻunga fakamamahi. Ko e ngaahi palopalema ʻoku hokosia ʻe he toʻutupú he ʻaho ní ʻoku hoko tatau ia ʻi he ngaahi ʻātakai fakaʻekonōmiká, fakasōsialé mo e fakamatakalí. “Kapau ʻokú ke fakakaukau ko e ‘fānau maumau-laó’ ʻoku ʻuhinga pē iá ki ha kulupu tokosiʻi ʻo e tamaiki tangata taʻu 17 mei he loto koló ʻa ia ko ʻenau faʻē masivá ʻoku moʻui ʻi he tokoni ʻa e puleʻangá, kuo teʻeki ai te ke ʻilo ki he meʻa ʻoku hoko fakamuimui tahá,” ko e tohi ia ʻa e faʻu-tohi ko Scott Walter. “Ko e fānau palopalemaʻia he ʻaho ní ʻoku lava ke pehē ko ha pālangi ia, ʻoku lava pē ke ne nofo ʻi ha ʻapi anga-maheni feʻunga pe ʻapi tuʻumālie, ʻe lava pē ke ne ʻi lalo (ʻo ʻi lalo ʻaupito) ʻi he taʻu 16, pea ʻe lavangofua pē ke pehē ko ha tamasiʻi ia pe ko ha taʻahine.”

Ko ia ai, ko e hā ʻoku fuʻu tokolahi ai ʻa e fānau ʻoku ʻi he tuʻunga fakatuʻutāmakí? ʻIkai naʻe toe fehangahangai ʻa e toʻutupu ʻo e ngaahi toʻutangata he kuohilí mo e ngaahi pole pea mo e ngaahi fakatauele? ʻIo, ka ʻoku tau moʻui ʻi ha vahaʻa taimi ʻoku fakamatalaʻi ʻe he Tohi Tapú ko e “ngaahi taimi faingataʻa.” (2 Timote 3:​1-5) ʻOku ʻi ai ʻa e ngaahi tuʻunga mo e ngaahi tenge ʻokú ne uesia ʻa e toʻutupu ʻa ia ʻoku nau makehe mei he taimi tefito ko eni ʻi he hisitōliá. Tau vakaiʻi angé ʻa e niʻihi ʻo kinautolu.

Ngaahi Liliu ʻi he Fāmilí

Ko e fakatātaá, vakai angé ki he tuʻunga liliu fakalūkufua ʻi he fāmilí. “Laka hake ʻi he vahe tolu ʻe taha ʻo e fānau ʻAmeliká kuo nau hokosia ha vete ʻa ʻenau ongo mātuʻá ki muʻa ke nau aʻu ʻo taʻu 18,” ko e līpooti ia ʻa e Journal of Instructional Psychology. ʻOku lava ke hā ʻa e ngaahi fika meimei tatau mei he ngaahi fonua Hihifo kehé. ʻI he movete ʻa e ngaahi haʻi fakaemali ʻa ʻenau ngaahi mātuʻá, ʻoku pau ʻoku faʻa fekuki ʻa e toʻutupú mo e ngaahi ongoʻi mamahi lahi. “ʻI he fakalūkufuá,” ko e lau ia ʻa e Journal, “ko e fānau kuo nau toki hokosia ki muí ni ha movete ʻi he fāmilí ʻoku nau maʻu ha taimi faingataʻa ange ʻi he ngaahi meʻa ʻoku ʻamanekina fakaako mo fakasōsiale ʻi he ʻapiakó, ʻo laka ia ʻi he fānau mei he ngaahi fāmili fāʻūtahá pe mātuʻa taʻehoa kuo hoko ʻi ha taimi paú pe ngaahi fāmili mātuʻa-uá . . . Tānaki atu ki ai, ko e vete fakaemātuʻá ʻoku faʻa uesia ai ʻa e ongoʻi lelei fakaeongo mo e fakamahuʻingaʻi-kita ʻa e kiʻi tamá.”

Ko e tokolahi fakautuutu ʻo e kakai fefine kuo nau kamata ngāué kuó ne toe liliu ʻa e ʻātakai fakafāmilí. Ko ha ako ki he faihia ʻa e toʻutupú ʻi Siapaní naʻe fakahaaʻi ai ʻoku faingataʻa ange ki he ngaahi fāmili ʻoku fakatou ngāue ʻa e ongo mātuʻá, ke tokangaʻi ʻa ʻenau fānaú, ʻi he ngaahi fāmili ko ē ʻoku nofo ʻa e taha ʻo e ongo mātuʻá ʻi ʻapí.

Ko e moʻoni, ʻoku fiemaʻu ʻe he ngaahi fāmilí ʻa e paʻanga hū mai ʻe ua koeʻuhí pē ke tokonaki ai ki he ngaahi fiemaʻu ʻi he moʻuí. Ko e paʻanga hū mai ʻe uá ʻe toe lava ke ne ʻoange ai ki he toʻutupú ha sīpinga moʻui fiemālie ange. Ka ʻoku ʻi ai hono tafaʻaki kovi: ʻOku foki atu ʻa e fānau ʻe laui miliona mei he akó ki ha fale ʻoku ʻikai ʻi ai ha taha. ʻI he taimi ʻoku aʻu atu ai ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻá, ʻoku nau faʻa helaʻia pea nōfoʻi ʻa e fakakaukaú ʻi he ngaahi palopalema ʻi he ngāué. Ko e hā hono olá? ʻOku siʻi ai ʻa e tokanga fakaemātuʻá ki he kau taʻu hongofulu tupu tokolahi. “ʻOku ʻikai te mau fakamoleki ha taimi fakataha ʻi hoku fāmilí,” ko e fakahaaʻi mamahi ia ʻe ha talavou ʻe taha.

ʻOku ongoʻi ʻe he kau mamata tokolahi ko e ʻalunga ko ení ʻoku ʻikai ko ha fakaʻilonga lelei ia ki he fānaú. “ʻOku ou tui ko e ngaahi ʻalunga fakaemātuʻa ʻa ia kuo hoko ʻi he ngaahi taʻu ʻe tolungofulu fakamuimuí ʻoku pouaki ai ʻa e tupulaki ʻo e ʻikai ha fepikitaki, ʻikai ha fetuʻutaki, faingataʻaʻia ʻi he akó pea mo e fānau taʻemapuleʻi,” ko e lau ia ʻa Dr. Robert Shaw. “ʻOku hoko ʻo fakafihiaʻi ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻá ʻe ha tuli ki he meʻa fakamatelié, sōsaieti ʻokú ne fakamamafaʻi tōtuʻa ʻa e lavameʻá, ʻa ia ʻoku taki atu ai kinautolu ke nau fakamoleki ʻa e ngaahi houa lahi ʻaupito ʻi he ngāué, pea ke fakamoleki ʻa e fuʻu paʻanga lahi, ʻo ʻikai lava ai ke nau maʻu ha taimi ke fai ʻa e ngaahi meʻa ʻoku fiemaʻú ke nau fakataha ai mo ʻenau fānaú.”

Ko ha fakamanamana ʻe taha ki he lelei ʻa e kau taʻu hongofulu tupú: Ko e fānau ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻa ʻoku ngāué ʻoku nau faʻa maʻu ʻa e fuʻu taimi lahi ʻoku taʻetokangaʻi ai kinautolu. Ko ha siʻi ʻa e tokangaʻi feʻunga fakaemātuʻá ko ha fakaafe ia ki he faingataʻá.

Ngaahi Fakakaukau Feliliuaki ʻo e Akonakí

Ko e ngaahi fakakaukau feliliuaki fekauʻaki mo e akonaki fakaemātuʻá kuo toe ʻi ai foki ʻene kaunga ki he toʻutupu ʻo e ʻaho ní. Hangē ko hono fakahaaʻi hangatonu ʻe Dr. Ron Taffel, ko e ngaahi mātuʻa tokolahi ʻoku nau “liʻaki honau tuʻunga mafaí.” ʻI he hoko ʻa e meʻa ko ení, ʻoku tupu hake ai ʻa e toʻutupú mo e ngaahi tuʻutuʻuni pe ngaahi tataki siʻisiʻi, ʻo kapau ʻoku ʻi ai, ke ne puleʻi ʻenau tōʻongá.

ʻI he ngaahi tuʻunga ʻe niʻihi, ʻoku hā ai ʻoku tākiekina ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻá ʻe he ngaahi hokosia kovi naʻa nau maʻu ʻi honau tuʻunga kei siʻí tonu. ʻOku nau loto ke hoko ko e ngaahi kaumeʻa ʻo ʻenau fānaú—ʻo ʻikai ko e kau fai akonaki. “Naʻá ku fuʻu anga-fakanainai,” ko e fakahaaʻi ia ʻe ha faʻē ʻe taha. “Ko ʻeku ongo mātuʻá naʻá na fuʻu fefeka; naʻá ku loto ke u kehe au ki heʻeku tamá. Naʻá ku hala ai.”

Ko e hā ʻa e tuʻunga kuo aʻu ki ai ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻa ʻe niʻihi ʻi he fekauʻaki mo e meʻa ko ʻení? ʻOku līpooti ʻe he USA Today: “Ko ha savea foʻou ʻo e meimei kau taʻu hongofulu tupu ʻe toko 600 ʻi hono ngāueʻaki ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú ʻi Niu ʻIoke, Tekisisi, Fololita mo Kalefōniá naʻe fakahaaʻi ai ko e 20% kuo nau maʻu ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú, tuku kehe ʻa e ʻolokaholó fakataha mo ʻenau ngaahi mātuʻá, pea ko e 5% nai ʻo e kau taʻu hongofulu tupú kuo ʻosi ʻoange kia kinautolu ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú—ʻo faʻa lahi ki he maliuaná—ʻe heʻenau ngaahi faʻeé pe ko ʻenau ngaahi tamaí.” Ko e hā te ne ueʻi ha mātuʻa ke ne fai ai ha meʻa taʻealafalalaʻanga pehē? Naʻe fakahaaʻi ʻe ha mātuʻa ʻe taha: “Naʻá ku tala ange ki heʻeku taʻahiné ʻe sai ange kiate au ke ne ngāueʻaki ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú ʻi ʻapi, ʻa ia ʻe lava ke u siofi ai iá.” ʻOku ongoʻi ʻe he niʻihi ngalingali ko e vahevahe ʻa e faitoʻo kona tapú ko ha founga ia ke “fakataha” ai mo ʻenau fānaú.

ʻOhofi mei he Mītiá

ʻOku ʻi ai leva ʻa e tākiekina mālohi ʻa e mītiá. Fakatatau ki he tokotaha fakatotolo ko Marita Moll, naʻe fakahaaʻi ʻe ha savea ʻe taha ʻi hono fakaʻavalisí ko e toʻutupú ʻi he ʻIunaite Seteté ʻoku nau fakamoleki ʻa e houa ʻe fā mo e miniti ʻe 48 ʻi he ʻaho ʻi muʻa ʻi ha TV pe komipiuta.

ʻOku kovi ʻaupito ia? Ko ha kupu naʻe pulusi ʻi he makasini Science naʻe līpooti ai ʻo pehē “ko e ngaahi sōsaieti lalahi fakapalōfesinale ʻe ono ʻi he ʻIunaite Seteté,” kau ai ʻa e Feohiʻanga Fakafaitoʻo ʻAmeliká, naʻa nau hoko ʻo loto-taha ki he fakamulituku ʻo pehē, ko e fakamālohi ʻi he mītiá ʻoku fehokotaki ia mo e “tōʻonga fakaaoaó ʻi he fānau ʻe niʻihi.” “Neongo ʻa e loto-taha ʻi he haʻohaʻonga ʻo e kau mataotaó,” ko e fakamatala ia ʻa e makasini Science, “ko e kakai ʻikai palōfesinalé ʻoku hā ngali ʻoku ʻikai te nau maʻu ʻa e pōpoaki mei he ngaahi ongoongo manakoá, ʻa ia ʻoku tokoni ai ʻa e fakamālohi ʻi he mītiá ki ha sōsaieti anga-fakamālohi ange.”

Ko e fakatātaá, fakakaukau angé ki he ngaahi vitiō hivá. ʻOku faʻa fakalele-loto ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻá ʻi he anga ʻo e maeʻeeʻa mo e fakahaaʻi kakato fakaefehokotaki fakasino, ʻi he niʻihi ʻo e ngaahi vitiō ko ení. ʻE lava moʻoni ke nau uesia ʻa e anga ʻo e tōʻonga ʻa e niʻihi ʻi he kau taʻu hongofulu tupú? Fakatatau ki he fakatotolo ʻe taha ʻo e kau ako kolisi ʻe toko 500, “ko e ngaahi lea ʻo e fasi fakamālohí ʻoku fakautuutu ai ʻa e ngaahi fakakaukau mo e ngaahi ongoʻi fakaaoaó.” Fakatatau ki ha toe fakatotolo ki muí ni, “ko e kau taʻu hongofulu tupu ʻoku nau fakamoleki ʻa e taimi lahi ange ʻi he sio ki hono huluʻi ʻa e fehokotaki fakasinó mo e fakamālohí ʻi he . . . ngaahi vitiō fasi laulau ‘fakakaukengí’ ʻoku ngalingali lahi ange ke nau ʻahiʻahiʻi ʻa e ngaahi tōʻongá ni ʻi he moʻui moʻoní.” Ko e fakatotolo ko eni ʻo e tamaiki fefine laka hake he toko 500, naʻe fakahaaʻi ai ko e faʻahinga ʻoku mamata lahi ʻi he ngaahi vitiō fakakaukengí naʻe lahi ange ʻa e ngalingali te nau taaʻi ha faiakó, puke ʻo fakahuú pea nau maʻu ha ngaahi hoa fehokotaki fakasino tokolahí.

Kau Taʻu Hongofulu Tupú mo e Ngaahi Komipiutá

ʻI he ngaahi taʻu ki mui ní kuo toe maʻu ai ʻe he komipiutá ha ngafa ʻiloa ʻi he tuʻunga ko ha meʻa fakafuo ia ʻo e ʻatamai ʻo e toʻutupú. “Ko e lahi ʻo e ngaahi komipiuta fakatāutaha ʻi he ʻapí kuo lahi fakautuutu ia ʻi he ngaahi hongofuluʻi taʻu ki mui ní,” ko e lau ia ʻa e pepa Pediatrics. “ʻI he fonuá kotoa [ʻi he ʻIunaite Seteté], ko e vahe tolu ʻe ua ʻo e ngaahi ʻapi ʻoku ʻi ai ha kiʻi tama taʻu ako (taʻu 6-17) kuo ʻi ai ha komipiuta . . . Ko e peseti ʻo e fānau ʻa ia naʻa nau taʻu 3 ki he taʻu 17 ʻi he ʻIunaite Seteté pea nau nofo ʻi ha ʻapi ʻoku ʻi ai ha komipiutá naʻe tupulaki ia mei he 55% ʻi he 1998 ki he 65% ʻi he 2000.” Ko e ngāueʻaki ʻo e komipiutá kuo tupulaki ia ʻi he ngaahi fonua lahi kehe foki.

Kae kehe, ʻoku ʻikai fiemaʻu ki ha toʻutupu ke ne maʻu ha komipiuta ke ngāueʻaki ia. Ko ia ai, ʻoku taukaveʻi ʻe ha tokotaha fakatotolo ʻe taha ʻo pehē, ko e “meimei 90% ʻo e toʻutupu taʻu 5 ki he 17 ʻoku nau ngāueʻaki ʻa e ngaahi komipiutá, pea ko e 59% ʻo kinautolu ʻoku nau ngāueʻaki ʻa e ʻInitanetí.” ʻOku ʻoange ʻe he meʻá ni ke maʻu ai ʻe he fānaú ʻa e fakamatalá ʻo lahi ange ia ʻi he toe taimi ki muʻa—ʻa ia ko ha meʻa lelei ia ʻo kapau ʻoku ngāue fakapotopotoʻaki ʻa e komipiutá, fakataha mo hano tokangaʻi feʻunga ʻe ha tokotaha lahi. Ka kuo fakaʻatā ʻe he ngaahi mātuʻa tokolahi ʻaupito ʻa e toʻutupú ki hono ngāueʻaki taʻefakangatangata ʻo e komipiutá.

Ko e fakamoʻoni ʻo e meʻá ni, ʻoku tohi ʻe he tokotaha fakatotolo ko Moll ʻi he Phi Delta Kappan ʻo pehē, fakatatau ki ha savea ʻi he 2001 ki hono ngāueʻaki ʻo e ʻInitanetí, “ko e peseti ʻe 71 ʻo e ngaahi mātuʻá ne nau fakakaukau naʻa nau ʻiloʻi ha ‘tuʻunga lahi pe tuʻunga feʻunga’ fekauʻaki mo hono ngāueʻaki ʻe heʻenau kiʻi tamá ʻa e ʻInitanetí. Neongo ia, ʻi he taimi naʻe ʻeke ai ki he fānaú ʻa e fehuʻi tatau, naʻe pehē ʻe he 70% ko ʻenau ngaahi mātuʻá naʻa nau ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa ‘siʻisiʻi ʻaupito pe halaʻatā’ fekauʻaki mo ʻenau meʻa ʻoku fai ʻi he ʻInitanetí.” Fakatatau ki he savea ko ení, “naʻe pehē ʻe he 30% ʻo e taʻu 9 ki he 10 naʻa nau fetuʻutaki fakaʻilekitulōnika ʻi he ngaahi loki fetalanoaʻaki fakatāutaha pea ki he kakai lalahí pē fakafou he ʻinitanetí. ʻOku hoko ʻa e palopalemá ʻo toe kovi ange, ʻi hono līpooti mai ʻoku fai ʻa e meʻa peheé ʻe he 58% ʻo e taʻu 11 ki he 12, 70% ʻo e taʻu 13 ki he 14 mo e 72% ʻo e taʻu 15 ki he 17. . . . ʻI ha savea ʻi Pilitānia ki hono ngāueʻaki ʻi ʻapi ʻa e ʻInitanetí, ko e mātuʻa ʻe taha ʻi he mātuʻa ʻe fitu naʻa nau fakahaaʻi ʻa e ʻikai haʻanau ʻilo ki he meʻa naʻe mamata ai ʻenau fānaú ʻi he ʻInitanetí.”

Ko e taʻetokangaʻi ʻa hono ngāueʻaki ʻo e ʻInitanetí ʻe fakaeʻa atu nai ai ʻa e toʻutupú ki he fakatātā fakalieliá. Kae kehe, ko e ngaahi fakatuʻutāmakí, ʻoku ʻikai ke ngata pē ai. Ko Taffel, naʻe lave ki ai ki muʻá, ʻokú ne fakahaaʻi mamahi: “Ko ʻetau fānaú ʻoku nau maʻu ha ngaahi kaungāmeʻa ʻi he ʻapiakó pea ʻi he saipasipeisí—pea ko hono olá, ʻoku nau fakamoleki ai ʻa e taimi mo e fānau ʻa ia ʻoku ʻikai te tau faʻa fetaulaki mo ia.”

ʻOku hā mahino, ko e toʻutupu he ʻaho ní ʻoku fakaeʻa atu kinautolu ki he ngaahi tenge mo e ngaahi palopalema naʻe taʻeʻiloa ʻi he ngaahi toʻutangata kuohilí. ʻOku ʻikai ha ofo ʻi hono fai ʻe he toʻutupu tokolahi ʻa e ngaahi founga fakatupu hohaʻá! ʻOku ʻi ai ha meʻa ʻe lava ke fai ke tokoniʻiʻaki ʻa e toʻutupu he ʻaho ní?

[Fakamatala ʻi he peesi 6]

“ʻOku ou tui ko e ngaahi ʻalunga fakaemātuʻa ʻa ia kuo hoko ʻi he ngaahi taʻu ʻe tolungofulu fakamuimuí ʻoku pouaki ai ʻa e tupulaki ʻo e ʻikai ha fepikitaki, ʻikai ha fetuʻutaki, faingataʻaʻia ʻi he akó pea mo e fānau taʻemapuleʻi.”—DR. ROBERT SHAW

[Fakatātā ʻi he peesi 6, 7]

Ko e kau ʻa e kakai fefine tokolahi ange ki he ngāué kuo liliu ai ʻa e ʻātakai fakafāmilí

[Fakatātā ʻi he peesi 7]

Ko e toʻutupu ʻoku tuku taʻetokangaʻí ʻoku lavangofua ke nau hoko ki ha faingataʻa

[Fakatātā ʻi he peesi 8]

Kuo fakafehokotaki ʻe he kau fakatotoló ʻa e ngaahi vitiō fasi fakamālohí ki he tōʻonga fakamālohí

[Fakatātā ʻi he peesi 9]

ʻOkú ke ʻiloʻi ʻa e meʻa ʻoku sio ai hoʻo fānaú ʻi he ʻInitanetí?