Kupambana m’Nkhondo Yolimbana ndi Uchidakwa

“Mkati mwa ntchito, cha m’ma 10 koloko m’maŵa, ndinkayamba kulingalira za moŵa. Pofika 12 koloko ndinkapita kukamwa botolo limodzi kapena aŵiri. Pofika 3 koloko ndinkayamba kunjenjemera. Ndinkalakalaka kuŵeruka kuti ndikamwe wina. Kaŵirikaŵiri ndinkamwa mabotolo angapo m’njira pobwerera kunyumba. Pofika 7 koloko ndinkalakalakanso wina. Ndinkamwa, kugwa pampando osamvako kanthu, kukodzera m’talauza langa, ndi kugona mu nkodzo wanga kufikira m’maŵa. Chulukitsani zimenezi ndi masiku 7 pasabata; kenako chulukitsani zimenezo ndi masabata 52 pachaka; ndiyeno chulukitsani zonsezo ndi zaka 29.”

MWAMUNA ameneyu ndichidakwa. Iye sali yekha. Mamiliyoni ambiri padziko lonse akulimbana ndi vuto loipa limeneli, malinga nkunena kwa Dr. Vernon E. Johnson, “limaloŵetsamo munthu yenseyo: thupi lake, maganizo, malingaliro, ndi uzimu wake.”a

Akatswiri ambiri amanena kuti uchidakwa sungachiritsidwe koma ukhoza kulamuliridwa kupyolera mwa njira ya kudziletsa kwa moyo wonse. Chimenechi sichili chiyeneretso chosanunkha kanthu, chifukwa chakuti moŵa suli chinthu chochilikizira moyo. Ndi iko komwe, kumwa moŵa mopambanitsa kumakwiitsa Mulungu. (1 Akorinto 6:9, 10) Ndibwino kumanidwa moŵa ndi kuloŵa m’dziko latsopano la Mulungu m’malo mwakumwa mopambanitsa ndi kutaikiridwa moyo wosatha.​—Mateyu 5:29, 30.

Kuleka​—ndi kumasuka​—kukumwa moŵa mopambanitsa kaŵirikaŵiri kumakhala chitokoso chogwiritsa mwala. (Yerekezerani ndi Aroma 7:21-24.) Kodi chingathandize nchiyani? Lekani tipereke uphungu wachindunji panopa. Ngakhale ngati simumamwa konse moŵa, uphungu umenewu udzakhala wopatsa chidziŵitso ndipo ungakukhozetseni kuthandiza bwenzi lanu kapena wachibale amene akulimbana ndi uchidakwa.

Kudzilingalira Mowona Mtima

Limodzi la mavuto aakulu koposa a kupambana ndilo kukana chenicheni chakuti ndinu chidakwa. Kukana kuli mtundu wina wa kusawona mtima. Kuli kudzikhululukira kokhala ndi chifuno: kutetezera ufulu wanu wakumwa moŵa. ‘Sindine chidakwa weniweni,’ mungalingalire motero. ‘Ndikusamalirabe banja langa. Ndikugwirabe ntchito.’ Komabe, musaiŵale kuti mukumwabe moŵa.

Kukana kungakulepheretseni kumvetsera kwa mabwenzi amene afuna kukuthandizani. Robert anaona kuti abambo opeza a mkazi wake anakhala ndi kamwedwe koipa kwambiri ndi mkhalidwe wa mwano. “Patapita masiku oŵerengeka, ndinayang’anizana nawo,” akutero Robert, “ndikumawafunsa ngati analingalirapo kuti kumwa kwawo ndiko kunachititsa mkhalidwe wawo.” Kodi anayankha motani? “Iwo anakana kwa mtu wagalu, ndi mawu akuti, ‘Ulibe umboni’ ndi kuti, ‘Sudziŵa mmene ndimamverera.’”

Ngati mufikiridwa ndi chiŵalo cha banja kapena bwenzi limene limadera nkhaŵa za kumwa kwanu, dzilingalireni mosamalitsa ndi mowona mtima. (Miyambo 8:33) Kodi mukhoza kukhala osamwa moŵa kwa mlungu wonse, mwezi wathunthu, kapena miyezi ingapo? Ngati simukhoza, nchifukwa ninji? Musafanane ndi munthu wodzinyenga yekha ndi kulingalira konama. Yakobo anati: “Iyeyu afanana ndi munthu wakuyang’anira nkhope yake ya chibadwidwe chake m’kalirole; pakuti wadziyang’anira yekha, nachoka, naiŵala pompaja nali wotani.”​—Yakobo 1:22-25.

Ngakhale pamene kuchira kwayambika, mudzayenerabe kuchenjera ndi kukana. Buku lakuti Willpower’s Not Enough limalongosola kuti: “Munthu woyamba kumene kudziletsa angakhulupirire molakwa kuti chifukwa chakuti wakhala wokhoza kusamwa kwakanthaŵi​—mwinamwake kwa nthaŵi yoyamba​—tsopano wachira.” Kumeneku ndiko kulingalira kwamphamvu kwambiri kwauchidakwa, ndipo kuli chiyambi cha kubwevukanso. Ngati mufuna kuletsa kukana koteroko, simuyenera kudziimira panokha popanda chithandizo cha ena.

Pezani Chithandizo

Pozindikira kuti sakanatha kulimbana ndi uchidakwa pa iye yekha, mwamuna wina amene tidzamutcha Leo anafunafuna chithandizo cha akatswiri. Pambuyo polandira chithandizo chachikulu chakuchiritsa, iye anayamba kuchira. Leo akuganiza kuti phindu la chithandizo cha akatswiri siliyenera kuonedwa mopepuka.b Ngati chithandizo choterocho chiliko kwanuko, ndibwino ngati mungaganize zakupitako.

Komabe, muyenera kudziŵa kuti kuchira kumaloŵetsamo zambiri kuposa kudziletsa kokha. Pambali pa uchidakwa mwachionekere pali nkhani zina zazikulu zimene muyenera kuyang’anizana nazo. Kuzinyalanyaza zimenezi kungakhale kwaupandu. Dr. Charlotte Davis Kasl akulemba kuti: “Ndafunsa anthu amene anachiritsidwa kuledzera mopambanitsa kwanthaŵi khumi ndi zinayi mobwerezabwereza chifukwa chakuti mavuto aakulu a kuchitiridwa nkhanza, kumwerekera, ndi kunyanyalidwa sanasamaliridwe.”

Dennis anaona zimenezi kukhala zowona. “Ndinali chidakwa wosiya kumwa ndipo ndinali ndi mavuto ena ambiri,” iye analemba motero. “Kuleka kumwa kokha sikunali mankhwala okwanira. Ndinafunikira kulingalira kwambiri za moyo wanga wakumbuyo, kupenda zimene ndinaphunzira paubwana, kumvetsetsa mmene zinandiyambukirira, ndi kupanga masinthidwe m’makhalidwe anga.”

Mofananamo, Leo anafunikira kudzilingalira mozama kuti apite patsogolo m’kuchira kwake. “Ndinali munthu wansanje kwambiri ndi wachiwawa,” iye akutero. “Ndinali kukhala wopsinjika maganizo nthaŵi zina ndi wonyada kwambiri nthaŵi zina.” Leo anagwiritsira ntchito uphungu wa Baibulo wa pa Aefeso 4:22, (NW) wakuti: “Vulani umunthu wakale wotsatira mayendedwe anu akale.” Inde, “mayendedwe anu akale” asonkhezera mwamphamvu umunthu wanu. Monga momwe dothi lokandidwa limaumbikira motsatira chikombole, choteronso mbali ina ya umunthu wanu yaumbidwa ndi mayendedwe anu akale. Pamene mayendedwe oipa achotsedwa, kodi chimatsala nchiyani? Umunthu umene waumbidwa mwinamwake kwa zaka zambiri. Chifukwa chake, kuchira kumaphatikizapo kusintha umunthu wakale umene umatsatira mayendedwe anu akale.

Pangani Unansi ndi Mulungu

Kuchira kwa Leo kunafunanso kukulitsa unansi waumwini ndi Mulungu. “Kuphunzira kudalira Yehova kotheratu kunasintha mkhalidwe wanga wa maganizo, makhalidwe, ndi kaonedwe ka zinthu,” iye anatero.

Komabe, ndibwino kusamala. Unansi uliwonse​—ndi anthu kapena ndi Mulungu​—umafuna kulankhula mosabisa, kuwona mtima, ndi kudalirika. Iyi ndiyo mikhalidwe imene uchidakwa umakokolola. Ikhoza kukulitsidwa, koma imatenga nthaŵi.

Monga chidakwa, mungakhale simukudziŵa mmene unansi wathithithi umamvekera. Mwinamwake simunakhalepo nawo. Chotero lezani mtima. Musafulumire kwambiri, musayembekezere kuti unansi wanu ndi Mulungu udzakhalapo mwadzidzidzi mutangoleka kumwa. Limbikirani kumvetsetsa Mulungu ndi mikhalidwe yake. Sinkhasinkhani nthaŵi zonse, mwinamwake mukumaŵerenga mosamalitsa masalmo a m’Baibulo amene amasonyeza maganizo akuya, ndi oyamikira Yehova ndi njira zake.c

“Mphamvu Yoposa Yachibadwa”

Unansi wokhulupirirana ndi wodalirana ndi Mulungu ungakhale ndi chiyambukiro champhamvu pa inu. Yehova adzachilikiza zoyesayesa zanu zakuchira. (Yerekezerani ndi Salmo 51:10-12; 145:14.) Mukhoza kumfikira mwa pemphero la mtima wonse panthaŵi iliyonse, muli ndi chidaliro chakuti adzakupatsani “mphamvu yoposa yachibadwa.”​—2 Akorinto 4:7, NW; Afilipi 4:6, 7.

Mlengi amadziŵa kapangidwe kanu kuposa munthu aliyense. (Salmo 103:14) Aphungu aumunthu, amene amadalira pa nzeru yaumunthu, akhoza kuthandiza; koma koposa chotani nanga mmene Mlengi wa munthu angakuthandizireni m’nkhondo imeneyi! (Yesaya 41:10; 48:17, 18) Iye wapereka chichilikizo chachikondi mumpingo Wachikristu.

Dongosolo la Chichilikizo

Akulu okula msinkhu wauzimu mumpingo Wachikristu angakhale magwero enieni a chithandizo. Ali oŵerengeka okha amene ali akatswiri m’zamankhwala kapena zakuchiritsa maganizo, koma iwo amadziŵa ndi kukhulupirira Mawu a Mulungu ndi malamulo ake amkhalidwe. Iwo angakhaledi “monga pobisalira mphepo, ndi pousira chimphepo; monga mitsinje yamadzi m’malo ouma, monga mthunzi wa thanthwe lalikulu m’dziko lotopetsa.” (Yesaya 32:2) Gwiritsirani ntchito mwaŵi wa chithandizo chawo.d

Ndithudi, akulu otero Achikristu, limodzi ndi ziŵalo zina za banja ndi mabwenzi, sadzakutetezerani ku zotulukapo za machitidwe anu. Buku lakuti Coming Off Drink limafotokoza kuti: “Mbali yovuta kwambiri yakuchiritsa zidakwa ndiyo kuyang’anizana ndi zidakwa zimene zinayambukiridwa moipa ndi kumwerekera ndi kuti uzipangitse kuvomereza thayo la mkhalidwe wawo.” Chotero iwo adzakhala achifundo koma osakubisirani kanthu, akumakulimbikitsani kuyang’anizana ndi chenicheni ndi kumamatira ku chithandizo chakuchiritsa chilichonse ndi makhalidwe ofunikira kuti mupambane nkhondo yanu yolimbana ndi uchidakwa.

Kuchira Kuli Thayo Lanu

Ngakhale kuti mumapindula ndi chichilikizo cha ena, mufunikira kudziŵa kuti palibe munthu aliyense kapena mzimu amene angakakamize kuchira kwanu. Inu ndinu cholengedwa chokhala ndi ufulu wakusankha. Kuchira kwanu kuli thayo lanulanu. (Yerekezerani ndi Genesis 4:7; Deuteronomo 30:19, 20; Afilipi 2:12.) Vomerezani thayo limenelo, ndipo Yehova adzakudalitsani. Tikutsimikiziridwa pa 1 Akorinto 10:13 kuti: “Sichinakugwerani inu chiyeso koma cha umunthu; koma Mulungu ali wokhulupirika, amene sadzalola inu kuyesedwa koposa kumene mukhoza; koma pamodzi ndi chiyeso adzaikanso populumukirapo, kuti mudzakhoze kupirirako.” Chifukwa chake, musataye mtima​—mukhoza kupambana m’nkhondo yolimbana ndi uchidakwa.

[Mawu a M’munsi]

[Bokosi patsamba 24]

Mwinamwake mukuvutika ndi kutaikiridwa nzeru ndi chisoni zochititsidwa ndi uchidakwa. Ngati zili choncho, musataye mtima. Chithandizo chilipo.

[Bokosi patsamba 26]

MUTABWEVUKA

“Kukhala wokonzekera kaamba ka kubwevuka kuli ngati kuphunzira maluso akuzimitsa moto,” likutero buku lakuti Willpower’s Not Enough. “Sikumatanthauza kuti mukuyembekezera moto koma kuti mumakhala wokonzekera kuchitapo kanthu mwathayo ngati ungabuke.” Mutabwevuka:

□ Pempherani kwa Yehova. Khalani wotsimikizira kuti iye amamvetsetsa mavuto anu ndipo amafuna kuthandiza.​—Salmo 103:14; Yesaya 41:10.

□ Ululilani mkulu Wachikristu, mutasankha pasadakhale amene mudzakambitsirana naye kutakhala kofunika. Ululani mowona mtima zimene zinachitika, ndipo mvetserani mosamalitsa ku uphungu wake Wamalemba.

□ Chenjerani ndi kutaya mtima. Kudzinyansa nokha kudzangokutsogolerani kukubwevuka kwakukulu, chotero onani kuphophonya kwanu ndi malingaliro oyenera. Kukhala mutalephera m’kulimbana kumodzi sikutanthauza kuti mwalephera nkhondo yonseyo. Wochita mpikisano wakuthamanga mtunda wautali akagwa, samabwereranso koyambira; iye amanyamuka napitiriza ndi mpikisanowo. Chitani zofananazo m’kuyesayesa kwanu kuchira. Mudakali panjira. Kuleka kumwa kwa masabata, miyezi, kapena zaka kumene munakuchita kumbuyoku kudakalipo.

[Chithunzi patsamba 25]

Peŵani kukana mwa kudzilingalira mosamalitsa ndi mowona mtima