“Maet Hem Savve Change Distaem”
ROXANAa hem woman wea luk naes and garem naesfala fasin. Hem garem fofala pikinini, and hasband bilong hem wanfala doctor long South America wea pipol respectim. Hem sei: “Hasband bilong mi showimaot gudfala fasin long olketa woman and olketa man laekem hem tumas.” Bat hasband bilong Roxana garem nogud saed, wea nomata olketa klos fren bilong tufala, olketa no lukim. “Long haos hem man wea mekem mi fraet tumas. Hem barava jealous.”
Feis bilong Roxana barava showimaot wari bilong hem taem hem go ahed for story. “Problem hem start tu-thri week nomoa bihaen mitufala marit. Olketa brata and mami bilong mi visitim mitufala, and mi enjoyim tumas for story and laflaf witim olketa. Bat taem olketa go bak, long raf wei hasband bilong mi torowem mi long chair, hem kros fogud. Mi hard for bilivim samting hia hem happen.”
Sorre tumas, datwan hem start nomoa bilong barava hard samting wea Roxana kasem, bikos insaed olketa year wea go pas hasband killim hem staka taem. Luk olsem wei wea hasband duim diswan hem followim wanfala pattern. Hasband bilong Roxana hem killim hem, then hem barava tok sorre and hem promis for nating duim datwan moa. Fasin bilong hem kamap moabeta—for lelebet taem nomoa. Then disfala nogud samting hem start moa. Roxana hem sei: “Mi evritaem tingim maet hem savve change distaem. Nomata taem mi ranawe, mi evritaem go bak long hem.”
Roxana hem wari, nogud wanday raf fasin bilong hasband bilong hem bae kamap moa worse. Hem sei: “Hem talem finis bae hem killim dae mi, olketa pikinini, and hemseleva. Wantaem hem holem naef long nek bilong mi. Narataem hem iusim gun for mekem mi fraet, hem pointim long ear bilong mi, and sutim nao! Mi hapi no eni bullet stap long gun, bat mi klosap dae from fraet.”
Olketa Stap Kwaet
Olsem Roxana, planti million woman long world safa from raf fasin bilong olketa man.b Planti no talem eniwan abaotem samting wea kasem olketa. Olketa tingse bae hem iusles nomoa for talem eniwan. Diswan hem bikos planti hasband wea spoelem waef denyim datwan witim toktok olsem “Waef bilong mi hem no balance saed long feeling” or “Hem savve extram samting tumas.”
Hem sorre samting hao planti woman evritaem fraetem attak long ples wea olketa shud feel sef winim eni nara ples—haos bilong olketa seleva. Bat, sorre tumas, planti taem pipol feel sorre long man wea duim diswan and no long woman wea safa. Tru nao, samfala pipol hard for bilivim hao wanfala man wea luk olsem hem garem stretfala living savve killim partner bilong hem. Tingim samting wea kasem wanfala woman wea nem bilong hem Anita, taem hem tokaot hao hasband bilong hem wea planti pipol respectim, killim hem. “Wanfala fren bilong mifala hem sei long mi: ‘Hao nao iu savve accusim wanfala gudfala man olsem?’ Narawan sei hao masbi mi nao duim samting for mekem hem kros! Nomata bihaen evri samting kamaot klia hao hasband bilong mi hem guilty, samfala fren bilong mi start for stap klia long mi. Olketa tingse mi shud acceptim diswan bikos ‘hem wei bilong olketa hasband.’ ”
Olsem experience bilong Anita hem showim, planti pipol no willing for acceptim truth hao wei for spoelem partner hem samting wea really happen. Wanem nao kosim wanfala man for deal long raf wei witim woman wea hem sei hem lovem? Hao nao olketa wea safa long raf fasin savve kasem help?
[Olketa footnote]
a Mifala changem olketa nem insaed olketa article hia.
b Mifala luksavve hao planti man tu safa long raf fasin. Bat olketa report showimaot hao olketa woman nao kasem olketa kill wea barava worse. Dastawe, olketa article hia bae storyim wei wea olketa woman safa long diswan.
[Box on page 4]
Big Bilong Raf Fasin Insaed Famili
Olsem United Nations Declaration on the Elimination of Violence Against Women hem talem, datfala toktok “raf fasin againstim olketa woman” savve minim “eni raf fasin againstim olketa woman wea spoelem, or mekem olketa safa saed long body, sex or mind, wea insaed diswan hem toktok for mekem olketa fraet, forcem or stopem freedom bilong olketa long raf wei nomata diswan happen long pablik or private laef bilong olketa.” Insaed long diswan hem, “raf fasin saed long body, sex and mind wea hem happen insaed long famili and community, wea minim tu for killim olketa woman, spoelem olketa girl saed long sex, raf fasin saed long marit present for girl, rape insaed marit, spoelem private part bilong olketa girl and olketa nara kastom samting wea spoelem olketa woman.”