Ikigabane ca 11

Kuguma Museruriranira Akari ku Mutima Bitagoranye

1, 2. Uguseruriranira akari ku mutima ni ukugira iki, kandi ni kuki biri n’akamaro?

UGUSERURIRANIRA akari ku mutima si ukuganira gusa. Ni nk’uko intumwa Paulo abivuga, ati iyo uwukwumviriza adatahura ivyo uriko uravuga, ‘mu vy’ukuri uba uriko uravuga ibitwarwa n’umuyaga.’ (1 Ab’i Korinto 14:9) Ubwo ivyo uvuga abana bawe bihora bibanyura, na wewe uhora utahura ivyo bashaka kukumenyesha?

² Kugira habe ivy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima koko, ivyiyumviro umuntu afise, iryo agona hamwe n’akanyengetera yiyumvamwo, birinda gusohoka muri we bikinjira mu wundi. Niba tuvuze ko urukundo ari rwo mutima w’umubano wo mu rugo urimwo agahimbare, uguseruriranira akari ku mutima twovuga ko ari vyo maraso ngengabuzima yawo. Ukudaseruriranira akari ku mutima kw’abubakanye bikwega ingorane. Iyo ari abavyeyi n’abana na ho nyene usanga bikomeye, canke mbere ugasanga ni agahomerabunwa.

UGUTEGANYA

3. Ni ikiringo ikihe mu buzima bw’umwana abavyeyi bokwitega ko haba ingorane mu vy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima?

³ Uguseruriranira akari ku mutima kw’abavyeyi n’abana ntibigorana cane igihe umwana akiri muto rwose, ahubwo birushiriza kugorana iyo abaye umuyabaga—mu myaka y’“ubuvyiruke.” Abavyeyi bakwiye kumenya ko ari uko bizomera. Boba bihenze biyumviriye ko abana babo ni bashitsa iyo myaka ata ngorane zizohaba, ngo ni uko imyaka yo mu ntango mu bisanzwe itabayemwo ingorane. Nta nkeka ingorane zizohaba, kandi uguseruriranira akari ku mutima vy’ukuri ntihagire ico umuntu ahisha, ni vyo bishobora kuziheza canke kuzigabanya. Abavyeyi ivyo babitahuye, usanga bakwiye kurāba kazoza, kwiyumvīra ivyo muri kazoza, kuko “iherezo ry’ikintu riruta itanguriro ryaco.”—Umusiguzi 7:8.

4. Ni ngombwa ngo uguseruriranira akari ku mutima mu babana mu rugo bigirwe mu kuyāga? Sigura.

⁴ Hariho ibintu vyinshi bituma uguseruriranira akari ku mutima mu rugo bitangura, bitsimbatara kandi bikaguma bigirwa. Harashobora gushira imyaka myinshi ugasanga umugabo n’umukenyezi wiwe ntibīkēkana na buhoro buhoro, umwe wese ugasanga arizigiye mugenziwe, kandi ugasanga barumvikana rwose ku buryo bishoboka ko baseruriranira akari ku mutima ata n’ijambo bavuze—ukurābana vyonyene, ukumwenyura canke ugukuyakuyana, bigashobora kugira ico bivuze rwose kuri bo. Bakwiye kugerageza gushinga ishimikiro rikomeye mwen’iryo nyene, ryotuma baseruriranira akari ku mutima n’abana babo. Igihe bitarashoboka ko uruyoya rutahura ibivuzwe, abavyeyi baratuma rwiyumvamwo ko ata kirugeramiye kandi ko rukundwa. Igihe abana bariko barakura, abo muri urwo rugo bakaba bakora ibikorwa bari kumwe, bagakina bari kumwe, kandi ikiruta vyose, bagasenga Imana bari kumwe, ivy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima bimwe bikomeye biba bishinze imizi. Ariko rero kuguma babishitsa bisaba ukwihāta vyeruye hamwe n’ubukerebutsi.

KUREMESHA UMWANA WANYU KUGIRA ABAGĀNIRIRE

5-7. (a) Ni kuki ari vyiza ko abavyeyi bokwitwararika ivy’ukutazibiranya umwana igihe ariko aravuga? (b) Abavyeyi bokwigisha abana gute kugira urupfasoni n’ugusonera abandi?

⁵ Hari abāyamaze ngo “umwana murābe ntumwumvirize.” Rimwe rimwe ivyo ni ivy’ukuri. Abana bakwiye gutahura ko hari “igihe co gucereza n’igihe co kuvuga,” nk’uko Ijambo ry’Imana ribivuga. (Umusiguzi 3:7) Ariko abana baripfuza rwose ko babumviriza, abavyeyi rero bakwiye kwirinda ntibababuze kuvuga uko bagomba igihe bidakenewe ko bababuza. Umwana mutoyi iyo hagize ikimushikira, ntiwitege ko agira nk’ivyo umuntu akuze agira. Iyo ikintu kibaye, umuntu akuze abona gusa ko ari agace k’ibintu vyinshi bishika mu buzima. Umwana we arashobora kunezerezwa rwose n’ikintu co muri uwo mwanya nyene, vy’ukuri kikamutwara wese, ku buryo yibagira ibindi bintu nka vyose. Umwana mutoyi arashobora kwitera mu nzu agatangura kwiganira se canke nyina wiwe inkuru ashwashwanutse. Nk’igihe uwo muvyeyi wiwe yomuzibiranya ashavuye ngo “numa!” canke akavuga ayandi majambo y’ukumukankamira, hari aho urweze rw’uyo mwana rwoca ruhera. Hari aho ivyo umwana ariko aravuga wobona ko ata co bimaze. Ariko abana banyu mubaremesheje ngo baje barabagānirira, mwotuma mu nyuma bataja barabīka mu nda ivyo mushaka kandi mukeneye ko babamenyesha.

⁶ Ukwigenza rupfasoni n’ugusonera abandi birafasha kugira habe ivy’uguseruriranira cane akari ku mutima. Abana bakwiye kwiga kugira urupfasoni, abavyeyi na bo bakabaha akarorero mu buryo bo nyene ubwabo baseruriranira akari ku mutima na nya bana, hamwe no mu bundi buryo. Ugukangīra abana birakenewe kandi vyogirwa igihe ari ngombwa, mbere bakanakangīrwa vyeruye. (Imigani 3:11, 12; 15:31, 32; Tito 1:13) Mugabo abana iyo umuvyeyi aja arabazibiranya, aja arabakosora ubudahengeshanya, canke mu kuvyunyura akabasuzugura mbere n’ukubatwenga akabatwenga iyo bariko baravuga, barashobora guheba kuvuga—canke bakarondera uwundi muntu bayāgira igihe bashaka kuvuga. Uko uyo muhungu canke umukobwa wawe akura, ni ko ivyo biguma birushiriza kumera gutyo. Ni kuki utobigenza uku—uno musi ku mugoroba, witonde uzirikane ukuntu mwaganiriye n’umwana wawe, hanyuma wibaze uti: Ni kangahe navuze ivyerekana ko ndamushimye, ndamuremesheje, ko ndamuyāga neza canke ko ndamuhaya? Turetse ivyo, ni kangahe navuze ibihushanye na vyo, bisa n’ivy’‘ukumukengereza,’ vyerekana ko umengo ntanshimisha, ko umengo yambabaje canke yanshavuje? Wotangazwa n’ukuntu wosanga bimeze.—Imigani 12:18.

⁷ Kenshi na kenshi usanga abavyeyi bakwiye kwiyumanganya no kwigumya. Abakiri bato barakunda kugira ibintu batiyumviriye. Hari aho bapfa gusohora ivyo biyumvīra, kumbure bagaciramwo abakuze iyo bariko baravuga. Umuvyeyi yoshobora guca buno nyene akankamira uyo mwana. Ariko rimwe rimwe hari aho yoba arushirije kugira ibiranga ubukerebutsi yumvirije n’urupfasoni agatanga akarorero k’ukwigumya, hanyuma ahejeje kumwishura mu ncamake, akamwibutsa n’ubwitonzi ko akwiye kwerekana urupfasoni no kwiyumvīra abandi. Ni co gituma n’aha nyene iyi mpanuro yoshobora gukurikizwa, ngo ‘wihutire kwumva, utebe kuvuga, utebe kuraka.’—Yakobo 1:19.

8. Abavyeyi boshobora bate kuremesha abana babo ngo babegēre babahanuze?

⁸ Urondera ko abana bawe biyumvamwo ko bokwegēra bakaguhanuza igihe bashikiwe n’ingorane. Urashobora kubaremesha bakabigenza gutyo mu kwerekana ko na wewe nyene uhora uhanuza, kandi ko hariho uwo uhanze amaso ukamworohera. Hariho umuvyeyi se w’ibibondo yasiguye uburyo atsimbataza ivy’uguseruriranira rwose akari ku mutima n’abana biwe bakiri bato bato, avuga ibi bikurikira:

“Imisi nka yose ku mugoroba ndasenga ndi kumwe n’abana mu gihe c’ukuryama. Mu bisanzwe baba bari ku buriri, nkapfukama hambavu yabwo nkabafata mu maboko. Iyo mvuze isengesho, kenshi na kenshi na bo mu nyuma baravuga iryabo. Birakunda gushika ko bansoma bakambwira ngo ‘dawe, ndagukunda,’ hanyuma bakampishurira akari ku mutima. Iyo badibamye mu buriri bwabo kandi bakumva ata cobakomakoma kubera ko bapfumbatiwe na se wabo, umwe umwe arashobora kuvuga ingorane afise arondera gufashwa, canke hari aho avuga gusa ibiranga igishika afise.”

Mu gihe c’ugufungura hamwe no mu bindi bihe, amasengesho uvuga—igihe atari ay’uguheza umwuga—ariko akaba ari n’ico avuze, akaba ava ku mutima kandi akaba agaragaza ubucuti nyakuri ufitaniye n’Umuremyi ari we So wo mw ijuru, arashobora gufasha rwose mu vy’ukwumvikana neza n’abo wibarutse.—1 Yohani 3:21; 4:17, 18.

IMYAKA Y’IHINDUKA

9. Twovuga iki ku vyerekeye ingorane imiyabaga bagira hamwe n’ivyo bakenera tubigereranije n’ivy’abana bakiri batoyi?

⁹ Imyaka y’ubuyabaga ni imyaka y’ihinduka, ni igihe umuhungu canke umukobwa wanyu ataba akiri umwana, ariko kandi ataba araba umuntu akuze. Imibiri y’imvyiruke irahinduka, bikagira ico bigira akanyengetera biyumvamwo. Ingorane imvyiruke zigira hamwe n’ivyo bakenera, biratandukanye n’ivyo mu gihe bataba baraba imiyabaga. Ni co gituma uburyo abavyeyi bakoresha mu gutorera umuti izo ngorane no mu kubagirira ivyo bakeneye bukwiye gusubirwamwo, kubera ko ubwo bākoresha bukagira akamaro abo bana batarakura budashobora kwama bugira akamaro bamaze kuba imiyabaga. Ukurushiriza kubasigurira impamvu birakenewe, kandi ivyo bisaba yuko uguseruriranira akari ku mutima birushirizaho kugirwa.

10. (a) Ni kuki bimwe vy’ugusigura utibabaje ivy’ukumarana inambu y’umubiri bidahagije ku bana b’imiyabaga? (b) Ukuyāga n’abana ivyerekeye ukumarana inambu y’umubiri abavyeyi bobitangura gute?

¹⁰ Akarorero, uburyo usigurira umwana mutoyi utibabaje ivy’ukumarana inambu y’umubiri, abamaze kuba imiyabaga nta co vyobamarira. Inambu bafise y’umubiri iravyuka, mugabo kenshi na kenshi isoni zikababuza kwegēra se wabo canke nyina wabo ngo babimusiguze. Abavyeyi bakwiye kuba ari bo batangura kubibabaza, ariko si ivyoroshe, kiretse iyo basanzwe baratanguje ivy’uguseruriranira rwose akari ku mutima kandi bakabishishikara, cane cane mu kwiyegereza abana babo n’igishika cinshi mu bikorwa no mu bikino. Igihe imbuto z’umuhungu zīsutse canke umukobwa akaja mu kwezi, ari bwo bwa mbere, ntibasimbwa n’umutima cane iyo bābibasiguriye bitarashika. (Abalewi 15:16, 17; 18:19) Umuvyeyi se w’ibibondo yoshobora kumbure gutangura kuyāga ivy’ukwimara inambu y’umubiri umuntu ari wenyene igihe ari kumwe n’umuhungu wiwe bariko baragendagenda, akavuga ko abakiri bato nka bose iyo ngorane ibashikira, hanyuma akamubaza, ati ‘None ivyo wewe uvyifatamwo gute?’ canke, ati ‘Ubwo na wewe ivyo biragushikira?’ Mbere n’ibiyago bimwe bimwe vy’ababana mu rugo bishobora kuba bishingiye ku ngorane abana b’imiyabaga bagira zerekeye ivyo, se na nyina w’abana bakabunganira mu gutanga impanuro batekanye, mugabo badakikiriza.

UGUTAHURA IVYO IMIYABAGA BAKENEYE

11. Abana b’imiyabaga batandukaniye he n’abakuze?

¹¹ “Ironkere ubukerebutsi; kandi mu vyo wironkera vyose, ironkere ugutahura.” (Imigani 4:7, NW) Mwebwe bavyeyi, nimukerebuke mu vyerekeye ukuntu abakiri bato bigenza; nimwerekane ko muciye mu kajisho mu vyerekeye akanyengetera biyumvamwo. Ntimwibagire ukuntu mwari mumeze igihe mwari mukiri bato. Nimwibuke kandi yuko naho umuntu akuze wese aba yarigeze kuba umwana kandi aba azi ukuntu ubwana bumera, ata mwana n’umwe arigera yiyumvamwo ukuntu ivy’ukuba umuntu akuze bimera. Umwana w’umuyabaga ntagomba kuguma afatwa nk’umwana, mugabo si umuntu akuze kandi ntihaba haragera ko ivy’abakuze bimushimisha. Ivy’ugukina biba bikiri muri we rwose, kandi usanga akeneye kubironkera umwanya.

12. Imvyiruke bashaka ko abavyeyi babo babafata gute?

¹² Iyo abakiri bato bageze muri iyo myaka, hari ibintu bimwe bimwe usanga barondera cane cane ko abavyeyi babagirira. Bagomba ko ivyabo babitahura; umwe wese muri ico gihe agomba kubonwa ko ari umuntu akwiye kurusha mu kindi gihe ico ari co cose; bagomba guhabwa amategeko-nyobozi n’ukuyoborwa bidahindagurika bijanye n’ico gihe baba begereje kuba abantu bakuze; bagomba rwose kubona ko bakenewe kandi ko bashīmwa.

13. Imvyiruke bashobora kugira iki iyo hagize ico abavyeyi bababuza? Kubera iki?

¹³ Abavyeyi ntibotangazwa n’uko umuvyiruke atanguye kuja aranka ivyo bamubujije. Abakiri bato ivyo babiterwa n’uko bashikiriye igihe bazoteba bakaba abantu bishira bakizana, kandi mu bisanzwe bashaka ko abavyeyi barushirizaho kubareka bakaja iyo bagomba canke bagahitamwo ivyo bigombeye. Inzoya ata co zirishoboza ziguma zikeneye kubungabungwa n’abavyeyi, n’abana batoyi barakeneye kuzigamwa rwose, mugabo iyo bakuze barashobora kugendagenda bagashika kure, bitayeko imigenderanire bafitaniye n’abataba muri urwo rugo irongerekana kandi igakomera. Iyo umwana w’umuhungu canke uw’umukobwa ariko agerageza ngo arābe ko yoronka ukwishira akizana, ukumuyobora birashobora kumera nk’ibitoroshe. Abavyeyi ntiboreka ngo abana babo babakengere canke babaharirize—kubw’ineza y’abo bana nyene. Ahubwo boshobora kugira ibiranga ubukerebutsi bakagerageza kuguma baseruriranira akari ku mutima na nya bana, bagumije ku muzirikanyi ikibatera kugira imigenzo mwen’iyo ishobora kubabaza umutima.

14. Iyo umwana ashaka ko arushiriza kwishira akizana, abavyeyi bomufata gute kandi bikagenda neza?

¹⁴ Abavyeyi bakwiye kugira iki iyo umuhungu canke umukobwa wabo aguma arondera kwishira akizana birushirije? Ico cipfuzo kimeze nk’irasoro itunatuniwe mu kiganza. Uyirekuye rimwe na rimwe, iraguruka igatarikira aho utiyumviriye. Uyigumije mu gihe kirekire uraruha, na yo nyene inguvu zikagabanuka. Mugabo uyirekuye buhoro buhoro uyifatiriye, iguma mu kibanza cayo.

15. Ni igiki cerekana yuko Yezu yarinze aba umuntu akuze arongōrwa n’abavyeyi?

¹⁵ Akarorero ka ben’ukwo kugendeza umwana ariko arakura gushika ashikīre ukwishira akizana, tukarābira kuri Yezu igihe yari akiri umwana. Ku vyerekeye igihe yari umuvyiruke, inkuru y’ivyabaye dusanga muri Luka 2:40, ivuga ngo “uno mwana arakura, agwiza inkomezi, yuzuzwa [ubukerebutsi, kandi ukwikundirwa n’Imana ntikwahera kuri we, NW].” Nta nkeka abavyeyi biwe bararangūye uruhara runini mu vy’ugukura kwiwe, kuko naho ata gahonzi yari afise, ubukerebutsi ntibwokwizanye. Ntibahengeshanya kumuha uburyo mu vy’umutima bw’ukugira ngo ace ubwenge, nk’uko iyo nkuru ibandanya kuvyerekana. Yezu amaze imyaka 12 y’amavuka, igihe abagize urwo rugo bari i Yeruzalemu ku musi mukuru wa Pasika, yaragiye mu rusengero atangura kuyāga n’abigisha b’ivy’ugusenga Imana. Biragaragara ko uwo muhungu w’imyaka 12 abavyeyi biwe bamuhaye uwo mwidegemvyo ungana gutyo w’ukuja aho agomba. Bārahagurutse bava i Yeruzalemu batazi ko asigaye inyuma, kumbure bibaza ko ari kumwe na benewabo bariko baratahuka na bo nyene, canke ko ari kumwe n’incuti. Haciye imisi itatu bamusanga mu rusengero, atariko arondera kwigisha abamuruta, ahubwo ariko “abumva kandi ababaza.” Nyina wiwe aca arerekana ko bari bahagaritse rwose umutima, Yezu na we aca arishura ata kagayo ko yibaza yuko bari kumenya aho bamusanga ata gukekeranya igihe c’uguhaguruka ngo bagende kigeze. Naho Yezu yari afise umwidegemvyo w’ukuja aho agomba, iyo nkuru ivuga yuko kuva ubwo “yama abumvira,” agakurikiza amategeko-nyobozi bashinga hamwe n’ivyo bamubuza igihe yashikīra imyaka y’ubuvyiruke, kandi “agwiza [ubukerebutsi, NW] no gukura no gushimwa n’Imana n’abantu.”—Luka 2:41-52.

16. Igihe abavyeyi bagize ingorane z’ukutumvikana n’umwana wabo w’umuyabaga, ni igiki bakwiye kugumiza ku muzirikanyi?

¹⁶ Ni co kimwe n’abahungu canke abakobwa b’imvyiruke, abavyeyi bakwiye kubareka bakishira bakizana muri bimwe bimwe, bakaja baravyongereza buhoro buhoro uko baguma begereza kuba abantu bakuze, bakabareka bakaja bararushiriza kwifatira ingingo bo nyene ubwabo, babayoboye kandi babahagarikiye. Iyo hadutse ingorane, ugutahura ico zivuyeko vyofasha abavyeyi bakirinda kuvyimbisha utuntu duto duto. Kenshi na kenshi umuvyiruke ntagarariza abavyeyi n’ibigirankana, ariko arondera kwishingira ivy’ukwishira akizana atazi ukuntu avyifatamwo. Abavyeyi rero barashobora kwihenda, kumbure ibitari amakosa bikaba ari vyo bagira amakosa. Niba ico kintu kidahambaye rwose, kireke kirengane. Mugabo ni caba gihambaye, komera. ‘Ntumimine agatūku’ canke ngo ‘uyongobeze ingamiya.’—Matayo 23:24.

17. Ni ibiki abavyeyi bozirikana iyo hagize ivyo babuza abana b’imiyabaga?

¹⁷ Abavyeyi barashobora kuguma bafitaniye ubucuti bukomeye n’abana babo b’imiyabaga, iyo bababuza ibintu ku rugero rubereye. Naho bwa ‘bukerebutsi buva mw ijuru irya mbere butyoroye,’ wibuke ko bufise n’“[ukwiyumvīra kuroranye, NW]” kandi “bwuzuye imbabazi,” “ntibugira uburyarya.” (Yakobo 3:17) Hariho ibintu bimwe bimwe Bibiliya yerekana ko bitarekuwe na buhoro buhoro, muri ivyo harimwo ubusuma, ubusambanyi, gusenga ibigirwamana, n’ibindi bibi bikomeye ben’ivyo. (1 Ab’i Korinto 6:9, 10) Ku vyerekeye ibindi bintu bitari bike, ukuba vyiza canke bibi hari n’aho biva ku rugero ababigize bashikiriye mu kubigira. Gufungura ni vyiza, ariko turiye vyinshi cane tuba tubaye ibisambo. Ni co kimwe rero n’ivy’ukwinezereza bimwe bimwe, akarorero nk’ugutamba, kuja mu vy’inkino, gutegura amazimano ugahamagara abantu, n’ibindi ben’ivyo. Kenshi na kenshi usanga ibigizwe atari vyo bibi, ariko ibibi ari ukuntu bigizwe hamwe n’abo mubigiranye. Nk’uko rero tutovuga yuko ukurya vyonyene ari bibi kandi mu vy’ukuri ubusambo ari bwo twanse, ni ko n’abavyeyi batojaniranya vyose ikivunga mu kunegura bimwe bimwe mu vyo abakiri bato bagira, kandi ico banka ari ukuntu bamwe bamwe babigira bakarenza urugero, canke ukuntu bishobora kubamerera nabi.—Gereranya no mu b’i Kolosayi 2:23.

18. Abavyeyi bogabisha abana babo gute ku vyerekeye abagenzi?

¹⁸ Abakiri bato bose baripfuza kugira abagenzi. Birashoboka ko bamwe bamwe muri bo mwobona ko ari abagenzi “beza,” ariko none abana banyu bo nta gahonzi bafise? Mwoshobora kubabuza kugendana n’abakiri bato bamwe bamwe, kubera ko mubona yuko bashobora kubonona. (Imigani 13:20; 2 Ab’i Tesalonike 3:13, 14; 2 Timoteyo 2:20, 21) Hariho abandi mwobona ko bari n’ico mwobakundira canke ico mwobagaya. Hako hogira n’umwe yimīrwa vy’ukuri kubera utugeso tumwe tumwe, mwopfuma mubwira abana banyu ko mumushimye kubera ingeso ziwe nziza, mugabo mukerekana ko bakwiye kuba maso kubera ivyo atigenzamwo neza, umuhungu canke umukobwa wanyu mukamusaba ngo akomere ntatwarwe n’iyo migenzo yiwe mibi, uyo mugenziwe akazoharonkera akunguko mu bihe bidashira.

19. Dukurikije ingingo iri muri Luka 12:48, abana bofashwa gute kugira ivy’ukwidegemvya babibone nk’uko bibereye kubonwa?

¹⁹ Uburyo bw’ugufasha umwana wanyu w’umuvyiruke kugira ngo ivy’ukwidegemvya rwose amenye kubibona nk’uko bibereye kubonwa, ni ukumufasha akamenya yuko ukwidegemvya birengereje bituma umuntu abazwa vyinshi. “Uwahawe vyinshi wese azobazwa vyinshi.” (Luka 12:48) Uko abana barushiriza kugaragaza ko atari ba sindabibazwa, ni ko abavyeyi boja bararushiriza kubizigira.—Ab’i Galatiya 5:13; 1 Petero 2:16.

GUSERURIRANIRA AKARI KU MUTIMA MU GUHANA NO MU GUHANŪRA

20. Turetse ukugira ubushobozi ku bana canke ukubategeka, ni ibiki bindi bikenewe kugira ngo ivy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima ntibipfe?

²⁰ Iyo umuntu ariko araguhanūra mugabo ntatahure aho uhagaze, uca wumva ko iyo mpanuro yiwe idashoboka. Niba afise ububasha bw’ukukugobera ngo ugire ivyo avuze, ushobora kwumva ko ari akarenganyo. Abavyeyi bakwiye kugumiza ku muzirikanyi yuko “umutima [utahura, NW] urondera kumenya,” kandi ko “umuntu [w’ubumenyi yongereza, NW] ubushobozi.” (Imigani 15:14; 24:5) Murashobora kugira ubushobozi ku bana banyu, mugabo igihe bwongererejwe inkomezi bivuye ku bumenyi no ku gutahura, mworushiriza kuba abantu bashoboye koko ivy’uguseruriranira na bo akari ku mutima. Bikunaniye kwerekana ugutahura igihe uriko urahana abakiri bato, amaherezo bishobora gutuma haba wa ‘mukokwe utandukanya abakuze n’abakiri bato,’ ivy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima na vyo bikaba bipfuye.

21. Abana bakoze ikibi gikomeye abavyeyi bobagirira iki?

²¹ Mwogira iki nk’igihe umwana wanyu agize ingorane, agize ikosa rikomeye canke akoze ikibi mutari mwiteze? Ntimukwiye na buhoro buhoro kuba intambirakibi. (Yesaya 5:20; Malaki 2:17) Mugabo muramenya ko ico gihe ari ho cane cane uwo muhungu canke uwo mukobwa wanyu akeneye ko ivyiwe mubitahura mukamufasha, mukamuha n’ubuyobozi buranga ubwenge. Nkako murashobora kuvuga nk’Imana Yehova, muti ‘enda nimuze twitātūre; ibintu birakomeye, ariko si ibidashobora gushirwa mu buryo.’ (Yesaya 1:18) Kurakara canke gutukagura umwana bikomeye, bishobora gutuma ivy’uguseruriranira akari ku mutima bigabanuka. Benshi mu bakiri bato bākoze ikibi, bāvuze ngo ‘sinari gushobora kubibwira abavyeyi—bari guca bandakarira.’ Mu Banyefeso 4:26 havuga ibi bikurikira: “Nimwaraka ntibibakoreshe icaha.” Niwigumye igihe uriko urumviriza ivyo umuhungu canke umukobwa wanyu akubarira. Ukwo kwumviriza neza gutuma rero igihano umuha acemera bitagoranye.

22. Ni kuki abavyeyi badakwiye na buhoro buhoro kumera nk’aberekana ko bāmaze guheba abana babo?

²² Kumbure si ikosa rimwe gusa ahubwo ni ingorane y’igihe kirekire, akageso kaguma kibonekeza. Naho ugutoza umwana indero ari nkenerwa rwose, abavyeyi ntibakwiye na buhoro buhoro kumera nk’aberekana ko bāmuhevye, mu mvugo canke mu vyiyumviro. Ukwihangana kwanyu kuva ku kuntu urwo mumukunda rungana. (1 Ab’i Korinto 13:4) Nturwanye ikibi ukoresheje ikindi, ahubwo gitsindishe iciza. (Abaroma 12:21) Nk’iyo umwana ateterejwe imbere y’abandi, ngo “wa kinebwe,” “wa mugarariji,” “nta co umaze,” canke ngo “twarahevye,” ivyo nta kindi bimara atari ukumubabaza gusa. Urukundo ntirureka kwizigira. (1 Ab’i Korinto 13:7) Umwana arashobora kugera kure agahinduka inkozi y’ikibi, n’i muhira akahava. Naho abavyeyi ivyo badashobora kubishima na gato, boguma bagabirije kumwakiriza yompi aramutse agarutse. Gute? Mu kwerekana ko banka iyo migenzo yiwe atari we banka. Barashobora kuguma bamubwira ko bazi neza yuko atabuze ingeso nziza, kandi ko bizigiye ko zizotsinda mbi. Ivyo niba ari ko biri, yoshobora kumera nka wa mwana w’igishushungwe avugwa muri ca kigereranirizo ca Yezu, akagaruka i muhira adakēka na buhoro buhoro yuko ko yihanye akagaruka, atazoshika ahambarirwa canke atazobura kwakiranwa igishika.—Luka 15:11-32.

UKUBONA KO UMWE UMWE WESE ARI N’ICO AMAZE

23. Ni kuki ari nkenerwa rwose ko abana b’imiyabaga biyumvamwo ko hari ico bamariye urugo?

²³ Ibiremwa-bantu vyose birakeneye kumenyekana, kwemerwa no gushimwa, bikabona ko bifise abo vyovuga biti aba ni ab’iwacu. Kugira ngo umuntu bamwemere kandi bamushime, agasangwa na vyo arabikeneye, birumvikana ko atoba ari uwishira akizana birenze urugero. Ategerezwa kuguma akurikiza imigenzo yemewe muri ico gisata abamwo. Abana iyo bakiri imiyabaga, barumva ko bakeneye kwitwa abo mu rugo runaka. Bafate neza babone ko hari ico bamariye urwo rugo, ko bafasha mu kugira rumere neza, mbere mubareke bajemwo mu vy’ugushinga imigambi imwe imwe no mu vy’ugufata ingingo mu rugo.

24. Ni igiki abavyeyi bakwiye kwirinda kugira ngo ntihabe umwana agirira ishari uwundi?

²⁴ “[Ntiduhinduke abishira imbere, NW]” ivyo ni intumwa ibivuga, “ngo [tuvyure ivy’uguhiganwa, NW] tugiriranire ishari.” (Ab’i Galatiya 5:26) Iyo umwana agize neza umuvyeyi akamushimira bituma agatima mwen’ako kadashobora kuvyuka, ariko umwana umugereranije n’uwundi ukaja uravuga ko uno wundi amuruta, biravyura ishari canke inzigo. Iyo ntumwa ivuga ngo umuntu wese “asuzume igikorwa ciwe, ni ho [azoronka igituma agira umwigino ku birāba we nyene gusa, kandi si mu kwigereranya n’uwundi muntu, NW].” (Ab’i Galatiya 6:4) Umwana ashima ko bamwemera nk’uko ari, kubera ico arimwo hamwe n’ivyo ashoboye kurangūra, abavyeyi bakamukundira ico.

25. Abavyeyi bashobora bate gufasha abana babo kuguma babona ko bari n’ico bamaze?

²⁵ Abavyeyi barashobora gufasha umuhungu canke umukobwa wabo akaguma abona ko ari n’ico amaze, mu kumumenyereza kwemera gushingwa ibikorwa vyose mu buzima. Abana babo kuva bakiri inzoya barabamenyereza kuba inzirabugunge, kuvugisha ukuri hamwe n’ukugirira abandi ibitunganye; barubaka kuri iryo tanguriro bashinze hakiri kare, mu kwerekana ukuntu izo ngeso nziza zigaragazwa mu gisata c’abantu. Muri ivyo harimwo n’uburyo bw’ukurangūra igikorwa umuntu ashinzwe akaba umwizigirwa. Igihe Yezu yariko “agwiza [ubukerebutsi, NW]” akiri umuyabaga, biragaragara ko Yozefu se wiwe w’umurezi yamwigishije umwuga, kuko n’igihe yatangura igikorwa c’ivy’Ubwami amaze imyaka 30 y’amavuka, abantu bamwise “wa mubaji.” (Mariko 6:3) Abahungu cane cane iyo bakiri mu myaka y’ubuvyiruke, bakwiye kumenya ico ari co gukora umuntu agashimisha ūmukoresha canke uwo bapatanye; naho coba ari igikorwa gitoyi, akarorero nk’ugutumwa ahantu. Bobereka yuko igihe ari abanyamwete, atari abaguruguru, ari abakozi b’abizigirwa baheza bakumva ko bīsoneye vyongeye bagasonerwa kandi bagashimwa n’abandi; yuko badahesha icubahiro abavyeyi n’abo mu rugo iwabo gusa, ariko kandi ko ‘bashariza inyigisho z’Umukiza Imana yacu muri vyose.’—Tito 2:6-10.

26. Ni umugenzo uwuhe kera werekana ko umwana w’umukobwa yari n’ico amariye ab’iwabo?

²⁶ N’abakobwa barashobora kwiga ubuhinga bw’ugusukura inzu n’ukuyishariza bigatuma bashimwa kandi bagashimagizwa, mu bo mu rugo no mu babanyi. Mu bihe Bibiliya yariko irandikwa, icagaragaza ko umwana w’umukobwa afise ico amariye abo iwabo, ni wa mugenzo w’ugusaba inkwano igihe bamushingiye. Ivyo nta nkeka vyabonwa ko ari nk’ukuriha ibikorwa atazoba agikorera abo mu rugo.—Itanguriro 34:11, 12; Kuvayo 22:16.

27. Ni kuki akaryo kabonetse k’ukwiga amashure mutokagisha ahubwo hogira ico kunguye abakiri bato?

²⁷ Akaryo iyo kabonetse k’ukwiga amashure ntimukagishe ahubwo abakiri bato hagire ico kabunguye, baharonkere ivya nkenerwa bizotuma bashobora kurwana intambara mu buzima bwo muri iyi si. Abo bakiri bato barimwo muri bamwe ya ntumwa iremesha ikavuga ngo “abacu na bo nibige [kuguma bakora] ibikorwa vyiza [igikorwa kitarimwo ivy’ubugunge, New English Bible] ngo babone kumara ubukene ababikwiye rwose, kugira ngo abacu ntibabe ibirumbirane.”—Tito 3:14.

UGUKINGIRWA N’IVYANDITSWE MURI BIBILIYA VYEREKEYE UKWIGENZA RUNTU

28, 29. (a) Ni impanuro iyihe Bibiliya itanga ku vyerekeye imigendano? (b) Abavyeyi bofasha abana babo gute kugira bakurikize iyo mpanuro?

²⁸ Birumvikana ko abavyeyi bahagarika umutima iyo ari ngombwa ngo abana babo bagendane n’abakiri bato bamwe bamwe b’inkozi z’ikibi kandi biyonona, kumbure bivuye ku vy’ukubana canke ku mashure iyo baja kwiga. Abavyeyi barashobora kwibonera ko ibi bivugwa muri Bibiliya ari ivy’ukuri, ngo “[imigendano mibi yonona, NW] ingeso nziza.” Ni co gituma batoshima kwemera ivyo umwana abasaba, avuga ngo ‘abandi barabigira, ni kuki none jewe ntobigira?’ Hari n’aho atari umwana wese abigira, kandi naho vyoba ari uko biri, ico si co cotuma umwana wanyu abigira ni vyaba ari bibi canke bitaranga ubukerebutsi. “Ntukagirire ishari abanyakibi, kandi ntukifuze kubana na bo; kuko umutima wabo wiyumvira guhonya, kandi iminwa yabo ikavuga ivy’ukugira nabi. [Ubukerebutsi, NW] ni bwo bwubaka urugo, kandi [ugutahura neza ukuntu ibintu biri ni vyo, NW] birukomeza.”—1 Ab’i Korinto 15:33; Imigani 24:1-3.

²⁹ Ntimushobora kwama muri kumwe n’abana banyu gushika barangije amashure, canke mu buzima bwabo bwose. Ariko rero igihe urugo rwanyu murwubakishije ubukerebutsi, mwoshobora kubarungika bafise ukwigenza runtu, bazi n’ingingo zitunganye zobayobora. “Amajambo y’[inkerebutsi, NW] ni nk’imihunda.” (Umusiguzi 12:11) Iyo mihunda kera zari inkoni ndende zisongoye. Bāzikoresha mu gusunika ibitungwa kugira bigende bitumbereye inzira. Amajambo y’Imana aranga ubukerebutsi atuma tudata inzira, iyo turamutse tuyitaye na ho, atuma ijwi ryacu ryo mu mutima riducumita tukareka kwigenza gutyo. Kugira ngo abana banyu baze bagume bamerewe neza, nimubarungike bafise ubwo bukerebutsi. Nimububinjizemwo mu mvugo no mu gutanga akarorero. Nimubinjizemwo rwose imico ngirakamaro, iyo abo bana banyu borondera kubona mu bandi bana batoye ngo babe abagenzi.—Zaburi 119:9, 63.

30. Abavyeyi bashobora bate kwinjiza mu bana babo ivyanditswe vy’Imana bigenga ukwigenza runtu?

³⁰ Muri ivyo vyose, muramenya yuko umwana kumbure ashobora kurushiriza kunyurwa rwose n’imico ngirakamaro yerekeye ivy’ukwigenza runtu, iyo i muhira ari ahantu izo ngingo zubahirizwa kandi zigakurikizwa. Nimubone ibintu nk’uko mugomba ko n’abana banyu babibona. I muhira iwanyu, muri mwebwe mubana mu rugo, nimurābe neza ko uburyo abana banyu bameze abakuze babitahura; ko nya bana bakundwa, bababarirwa; ko mubareka bakishira bakizana bibayabaye ata co vyobagira ntimubarenganye kandi ntimubagirire nabi, bakabona ko bemewe kandi ko bari n’ababo, agasangwa ivyo ni vyo bakeneye. Nimukoreshe ubwo buryo mubinjizemwo ivyanditswe vy’Imana bigenga ukwigenza runtu, ivyo bazogenda bajanye ni bava muri urwo rugo. Nta ragi mwobaha ryoza risumba iryo.—Imigani 20:7.