Chipolopolo Chinasintha Moyo Wanga

CHINTHU chabwino kwambiri chimene makolo angachitire ana awo ndicho kuwaphunzitsa kudziŵa Mlengi wawo ndi kukhala ndi chikhumbo cha kumtumikira. Tsoka limene linandigwera pamene ndinali wachichepere landithandiza kuyamikira choonadi chimenechi.

Ndisanafotokoze zimene zinachitika panthaŵiyo—zaka zoposa 20 zapitazo—imani kaye ndikuuzeni pang’ono za moyo wanga pamene ndinali kukula kummwera kwa United States. Zimagwirizana mwachindunji ndi mmene ndakhalira wokhoza kulimbana ndi nsautso zochuluka.

Chimene Chinaumba Moyo Wanga

Ndinabadwira ku Birmingham, Alabama—mbali ya ku Deep South kwa anthu oikidwa m’magulu chifukwa cha tsankhu—mu January 1955. Pamene ndinali ndi zaka zisanu ndi zitatu zokha, bomba lina lophulika pafupi ndi nyumba yathu linaphwanya tchalitchi china mkati mwa makalasi a Sande sukulu. Ana achikuda ogwidwa ndi mantha, ambiri a iwo amene anali ausinkhu wanga, anathaŵamo akumakuwa; ena anali kuchucha mwazi ndi kubuula. Anayi anafa—kuphedwa ndi azungu.

Masoka otero anali kuchitika nthaŵi zambiri ku South. M’chilimwe chotsatira anthu atatu antchito yomenyera nkhondo ufulu wa munthu anaphedwa ku Mississippi. Masiku amenewo anali a chipwirikiti chowopsa cha kusankhana mafuko chimene chinayambukira tonsefe.

Amayi anali mmodzi wa Mboni za Yehova, ndipo Atate anakhala mmodzi wa iwo mu 1966. Posapita nthaŵi banja lathu lonse linali kuuza anansi athu za chiyembekezo chathu cha dziko latsopano lamtendere chozikidwa pa Baibulo. (Salmo 37:29; Miyambo 2:21, 22; Chivumbulutso 21:3, 4) Loŵeruka lililonse m’nyengo ya chilimwe cha zaka za kumapeto kwa ma 1960, tinali kupita kumagawo osafoledwa kunja kwa Birmingham kukalalikira. Kumeneko, anthu anali asanamvepo za Mboni za Yehova kapena za uthenga wa Ufumu umene tinalalikira. Sanadziŵenso ngakhale dzina la Mulungu, Yehova. (Salmo 83:18) M’nthaŵi zovuta zimenezo, ndinasangalaladi kulankhula ndi anthu za chifuno cha Yehova cha kuchotsa dziko loipa lakaleli ndi kubweretsa paradaiso wa pa dziko lapansi m’malo mwake.—Luka 23:43.

Kuika Chonulirapo m’Moyo

Mu December 1969, ndinasonyeza kudzipatulira kwanga kwa Yehova ndi ubatizo wa m’madzi. Ndinapemphera kwa Yehova ndi kumuuza chikhumbo changa chachikulu cha kutsata utumiki wanthaŵi yonse monga ntchito yodzisankhira. Patapita masabata angapo, Atate anasankhidwa kuti akatumikire kumpingo wina waung’ono ku Adamsville, pamtunda wa makilomita oŵerengeka kuchokera ku Birmingham. Kusintha kumeneku kwa gawo kunakulitsa chikhumbo changa cha kukhala mpainiya, kapena mtumiki wanthaŵi yonse. Ndinali kuchita upainiya wothandiza pamene ndinali ndi mpata uliwonse m’zaka zanga za kusukulu ya sekondale, zimene zinaphatikizapo kuthera pafupifupi maola 75 mu utumiki mwezi uliwonse.

Ndinasankha zophunzira ntchito ina yake yondikonzekeretsa mu utumiki wanthaŵi yonse pambuyo pomaliza sukulu. Komano m’chaka changa chotsiriza cha kusekondale, ndinakumana ndi chitokoso china. Ndinali pakati pa kagulu ka ophunzira okhoza kwambiri, chotero tsiku lina ndinapititsidwa kukoleji ina imene inali pafupi kuti ndikayesedwe mayeso. Pambuyo pake ndinaitanidwa mu ofesi ya mlangizi. Iyeyo anali wokondwa nane. “Wapambana!” iye anatero. “Ukhoza kupita kukoleji iliyonse imene ungasankhe!” Anafuna kuti ndiyambe kulemba fomu yopempha ndalama zolipirira sukuluyo nthaŵi yomweyo.

Ndinasokonezeka maganizo chifukwa chakuti sindinakonzekere zimenezi. Nthaŵi yomweyo ndinalongosola zolinganiza zanga za kukhala mtumiki wanthaŵi yonse ndi kupeza ntchito ya maola ochepa kuti ndidzichirikize mu utumiki wanga. Ndinamuuzanso kuti pambuyo pake, monga momwe Mboni zina zachitira, ndingakhoze kukatumikira monga mmishonale kudziko lachilendo. Koma zinachita ngati kuti sanandimve. Anapereka lingaliro lakuti ndiloŵe m’maphunziro a sayansi ndi kuti ngati ndipita kukoleji ya kumaloko, adzatsimikizira zondipezera ntchito pamalo a sayansi.

“Chita zinthu za chipembedzo chako pakutha kwa milungu, Gloria,” iye anatero, “makolo ako adzanyadabe chifukwa cha iwe.” Ndinanyansidwa kuti mwina analingalira kuti chonulirapo changa cha utumiki wanthaŵi yonse chinakhalapo chifukwa cha kusonkhezeredwa ndi makolo anga. Anandichititsa kukhala wotsenderezeka, monga ngati kuti ndinali kunyalanyaza fuko lonse la anthu akuda chifukwa cha kukana mwaŵi waukulu umenewu. Komabe, ndinachirimika pa malingaliro anga. Nditamaliza sukulu, m’malo mwa kupita kukaphunzira kukoleji, ndinayamba kugwira ntchito ya maola ochepa monga mlembi.

Ndinafunafuna mnzanga wochita naye upainiya koma sindinampeze. Pamene woyang’anira woyendayenda anafika mumpingo wathu, ndinamuuza za vuto langa. “Suufunikira mnzako ayi,” iye anatero. Ndiyeno anandikonzera ndandanda yondikhozetsa kugwira ntchito yanga yakuthupi ndiponso kundipatsa nthaŵi yokwanira ya kuchita upainiya. Ndinaona kuti ndandandayo inali yabwino kwambiri. Ndinakondwa kwambiri kwakuti ndinasankha February 1, 1975, kukhala deti langa la kuyamba upainiya.

Komabe, masiku angapo pambuyo pake, pa December 20, 1974, pamene ndinali kupita kunyumba kuchokera kusitolo ina yogulitsa zinthu kwa maola ambiri, ndinalasidwa ndi chipolopolo chosokera.

Pa Khomo la Imfa

Pamene ndinali kwala pansi, ndinaonadi mwazi wanga ukutha m’thupi. Ndikukumbukira ndikumaganiza kuti kumeneku ndiko kufa. Ndinapempha Yehova kuti andilole kukhalabe ndi moyo kuti zimenezo zithandize Amayi kuzindikira kuti ngozi yovutitsa maganizo yotero ingathe kuchitika ngakhale pabanja limene limaika mtima pa kutumikira Yehova. Ngakhale kuti tinazoloŵera lemba la Baibulolo “nthaŵi ndi zochitika zosaonedweratu zimagwera onse,” ndinaganiza kuti tinali osakonzekera kuyang’anizana ndi tsoka lowopsa lotero.—Mlaliki 9:11, NW.

Chipolopolocho chinandilasa kumanzere kwa khosi, chikumadula mitsempha ya fupa la msana wanga. Kulankhula ndi kupuma kwanga zinasokonezeka. Sanandiyembekezere kukhala ndi moyo kuposa masiku aŵiri. Ndiyeno anati “masabata aŵiri.” Koma ndinapitiriza kukhala ndi moyo. Pamene ndinayamba kudwala chibayo, anandisamutsira ku makina ena ocholoŵana koposa othandizira kupuma. Potsirizira pake, ndinayamba kuongokera, ndipo anapanga makonzedwe a kundipititsa kumalo ophunzitsira munthu kubwezeretsa moyo pachimake.

Mayeso a Kuphunzitsidwa Kubwezeretsa Moyo Pachimake

Pa masabata angapo oyamba ndinali ndi chiyembekezo. Ndinangomangika thupi. Aliyense amene anali pa Spain Rehabilitation Center ku Birmingham anali wokoma mtima ndipo anagwira ntchito zolimba kaamba ka ine. Ndinayamba kudziŵa kuchokera kwa ogwira ntchito ake kuti madokotala anayembekezera kuti ndidzakhala woferatu ziŵalo, wogona chagada, kwa moyo wanga wonse. Ndinaikidwa m’gulu la olemala mikono ndi miyendo a C2, zimene zinatanthauza kuti anaganiza kuti ndidzakhala pa makina othandizira kupuma moyo wanga wonse, wosakhoza kulankhula koma kungonong’ona chabe.

Madokotala anaika mpope umene ndinapumiramo mu mmero wanga. Pambuyo pake katswiri wodziŵa za mapapu anaika mpope waung’ono kuti aone ngati ndingalankhule. Komabe, ukulu wakewo sunachite chilichonse. Chotero ananena kuti kulephera kwanga kulankhula kunachitika chifukwa cha kuwonongeka kwa mitsempha. Panthaŵi imeneyo ndinayamba kupsinjika maganizo, ndipo panalibe mawu alionse a munthu amene anandipangitsa kupeza bwinopo. Mawu alionse okoma mtima anali ngati onditonza. Chotero ndinkalira kwambiri.

Ndinazindikira kuti ngati kanthu kena kadodometsa mkhalidwe wako wauzimu, pali zinthu ziŵiri zimene zingakuthandize—pemphero la khama kwa Yehova ndi kudzitanganitsa ndi utumiki, kuuza ena za choonadi cha Baibulo. (Miyambo 3:5) Chabwino, kupemphera kunali kosavuta. Ndinkatha kuchita zimenezo. Komano kodi ineyo mu mkhalidwe wangawo, ndikanakhala bwanji wokangalika mu utumiki?

Ndinapempha a m’banja mwanga kundibweretsera makope a magazini a Nsanja ya Olonda ndi Galamukani! ndi mabuku ena othandiza kufotokoza Baibulo amene tinali kugwiritsira ntchito mu utumiki panthaŵiyo, monga ngati Coonadi Cimene Cimatsogolera ku Moyo Wamuyaya, Mtendere Weni-weni ndi Chisungiko—Zochokera ku Magwero Otani?, ndi Kodi Moyo Uno Ndiwo Wokha Umene Ulipo? Ndinaika ameneŵa kumbali zosiyanasiyana za chipinda changa. Kaŵirikaŵiri ogwira ntchito ankandiyang’ana mwachifundo ndi kufunsa kuti: “Wokondedwa, kodi pali chinthu chimene ndingakuchitire?”

Ndinkatembenuzira maso pa buku, ndipo mwa kugwedeza milomo, ndinkapempha munthuyo kundiŵerengera. Ndinkaŵerenga nthaŵi imene munthu wathera akuŵerenga kukhala maola anga a mu utumiki. Kuti ndisonyeze kuthokoza kwanga munthuyo chifukwa cha kundiŵerengera, kaŵirikaŵiri ndinkampatsa bukulo kapena magazini monga mphatso. Ndinaŵerengera zimenezi kukhala zogaŵira zanga. Pamene wina anandiŵerengera kachiŵiri, ndinkaŵerengera zimenezi kukhala ulendo wobwereza. Kukhala ndi phande motere mu utumiki kunandilimbikitsa, monga momwe anachitira makhadi osangalatsa mtima, maluŵa, ndi kudzazondedwa ndi abale ndi alongo anga ambiri Achikristu.

Miyezi yambiri ya kubwezeretsa moyo wanga pachimake itapita, ndinali wokhoza kungoimitsa mutu wanga pang’ono. Koma ndinali wofunitsitsa kutakasuka thupi mowonjezereka. Chotero ndinapempha nthaŵi yowonjezereka ya kulimbitsa thupi ndi ntchito. Pamene ndinapempha kuikidwa pa njinga ya wolemala, ndinauzidwa kuti zimenezo zinali zosatheka, kuti sindikanatha kuimitsa mutu wanga nditakhala tsonga. Ndinawapempha kuti ndiyesebe zimenezo.

Nditavomerezedwa ndi madokotala, dokotala wamkulu anandiika pa njingayo. Anandikulunga ndi mabandeji a ace kuyambira pachifuwa kufikira m’chuuno, kuyambira mu ntchafu kufikira m’mawondo, ndi kuyambira m’mawondo kufikira kumapazi. Ndinaoneka ngati mtembo woumikidwa. Imeneyi inali njira yoti atsimikizire kuti kuthamanga kwa mwazi wanga sikunasinthe ndi kupeŵetsa kufooka. Zinagwira ntchito! Komabe, ndinangololedwa kukhala tsonga kwa ola limodzi panthaŵi iliyonse. Koma ndinali kukhala tsonga—pambuyo pa kugona chagada kwa masiku 57!

Ndifika Kwathu Potsiriza!

Potsirizira pake, miyezi isanu yovuta itapyola, mpope wanga wa mu mmero unachotsedwa, ndipo ndinaloledwa kumka kwathu. Mmenemo munali m’May wa 1975. Pambuyo pake, ndinali kupitapita kumalo a opundukawo kaamba ka thandizo la kuchira. Kuchiyambiyambi kwa chilimwe cha 1975, ndinayamba kupita mu utumiki Wachikristu pa njinga yangayo. Sindinali kuchita zambiri, komano ndinkatha kupita kumunda ndi mabwenzi.

Panthaŵi ina kuchiyambiyambi kwa 1976, ndinapemphedwa kumka kukapendedwanso ndi VRS (Vocational Rehabilitation Services), bungwe limene linali kundilipirira ndalama pa kuchira kwanga. Ndinalingalira kuti ndinali kuwongokera. Ndinali kuphunzira kujambula ndi bulashi limene ndinaliluma. Ndinayamba kutayipa mwa kumagwiritsira ntchito kandodo mwanjira yofananayo, ndipo ngakhale kulembera ena makalata ndi pensulo. Popeza kuti a bungwe la VRS anali kulipirira mokulira pa kuchira kwanga, anafuna kuti apeze njira yakuti ndipezere ntchito ndi kukhala waphindu m’chitaganya.

Mlangizi wake anachita ngati wolingalira ena poyamba, komano anayamba kundipempha kuti ndiyese kulankhulitsa. Panthaŵiyo ndinkangotulutsa mawu pang’ono. Ndiyeno anandifunsa kuti: “Kodi sungakhale tsonga?”

Sindinathe kutero.

“Gwedeza chala chimodzi chokha.” iye anatero.

Pamene ndinalephera ngakhale kuchita zimenezo, anamenyetsa peni yake padesiki lake nanena mokwiya kuti: “Ndiwe wopanda pake!”

Anandiuza kuti ndizipita kwathu ndi kukayembekezera telefoni yake. Ndinaona vuto limene anali nalo. Palibe wodwala wina amene anafika ine ndisanafike pa Spain Rehabilitation Center amene anali wopunduka kwambiri monga ine. Mtengo wa zipangizo zimene zinali kugwiritsiridwa ntchito pamenepo ngwokwera kwambiri, ndipo munthu amene anali wopanga zosankha analibe zitsogozo ponena za zimene anafunikira kuchita ndi wopuduka kwambiri ngati ine. Komabe, zinandiŵaŵa ponditchula kuti wopanda pake, popeza kuti ndinali nditayamba kale kulingalira mwa njira imeneyo.

Masiku angapo pambuyo pake, ndinalandira telefoni ndipo ndinauzidwa kuti ndinali nditachotsedwa m’programuyo. Ndinamva kukhala wonyanyalidwa. Ndipo zimenezo zinandichititsa kuchitanso tondovi.

Kugonjetsa Tondovi

Ndiyeno ndinalingalira za lemba la Salmo 55:22, limene limati: “Umsenze Yehova nkhaŵa zako, ndipo iye adzakugwiriziza.” Chinthu chimodzi chimene ndinada nacho nkhaŵa chinali vuto la kusoŵa ndalama kwa makolo anga, ndipo ndinapempherera zimenezi.

Mkhalidwe wanga wa tondovi unandiyambukira mwakuthupi moipa kwambiri, chotero mkati mwa msonkhano wachigawo chilimwe chimenecho sindinathe kukhala tsonga. Ndinamvetsera programuyo ndili chigonere. Pa msonkhano umenewo wa 1976 panatchulidwa kuyambika kwa ntchito imene imatchedwa kuti upainiya wothandiza, ndipo ndinachita tcheru. Kuti munthu achite upainiya wothandiza amafunikira kuthera maola 60 okha pamwezi mu utumiki, avareji ya maola aŵiri okha patsiku. Ndinalingalira kuti ndingathe kuchita zimenezo. Pambuyo pake, ndinapempha mbale wanga Elizabeth kuti andithandize kuchita upainiya wothandiza. Iyeyo anaganiza kuti ndinali kuchita nthabwala, koma pamene ndinapereka fomu yanga yofunsira upainiya mu August, nayenso anapereka yake.

Elizabeth ankadzuka mmamaŵa ndi kundikonzera zimene ndinafunikira. Ndiyeno tinkayamba kuchita umboni wa pa telefoni. Zimenezi zinaphatikizapo kuimbira telefoni anthu ndi kukambitsirana nawo za madalitso amene Mulungu wasungira anthu mu ulamuliro wa Ufumu wake. Tinkalembanso makalata, makamaka kwa anthu amene anafunikira chitonthozo. Pakutha kwa milungu banja kapena mabwenzi ankanditengera ku utumiki wa kukhomo ndi khomo pa njinga yanga. Zoonadi, popeza kuti sindingathe kugwiritsira ntchito ziŵalo zanga, ndimangolankhula za uthenga wa Ufumu, kugwira mawu malemba, kapena kupempha ena kundiŵerengera Baibulo.

Podzafika tsiku lomaliza la mwezi, panatsalabe maola ena asanu ndi limodzi oti ndifitse chofunika changa cha 60. Panalibe Elizabeth kuti andithandize, chotero ndinapempha amayi kuti aimike chakumbuyo cha mpando wa pa njinga yanga kuti ndikhale tsonga. Ndiyeno, mwa kugwiritsira ntchito kamwa langa, ndinatayipa makalata kwa maola asanu ndi limodzi. Sindinadwale ndi zimenezi! Chinthu chokha chimene ndikudziŵa nchakuti ndinatopadi!

Pemphero Langa Liyankhidwa

Mlungu wotsatirapo, ndinapita ku Spain Rehabilitation Center nditakhala tsonga kukapimidwa. Dokotala wanga, amene anali asanandionepo chiyambire pamene ndinachotsedwa pa programu kuchiyambiyambi kwa chakacho, anadabwa. Sanathe kukhulupirira za mmene ndinawongokerera. “Kodi wakhala ukuchitanji?” anafunsa motero. Ndisanathe nkomwe kumsimbira za utumiki wanga, anandilemba ntchito.

Womthandiza wake anandifunsa za ntchito ndipo anachita chidwi ndi zimene ndinali kuchita mu utumiki. Anandipempha kugwirizana ndi ena m’programu imene imatchedwa kuti ya wopunduka wachitsanzo. Mu imeneyi ndinali kupatsidwa mnzanga wopunduka amene ndinali kuthandiza. Potchula za utumiki wathu, iyeyo anati: “Ndi iko komwe zimenezi nzimene anthu ako amachita, sichoncho kodi?” Ndinapatsidwa wopunduka wina pafupifupi ngati ine kuti ndimthandize.

Mbiri yonena za zimene ndinali kuchita mu utumiki ndi thandizo la banja lathu inafika kwa a VRS. Anachita chidwi kwambiri kwakuti anati ndiyenera kubwezeretsedwa m’programu ija. Zimenezi zinatanthauza kuti banja lathu lizilandira ndalama zolipirira zipangizo zapadera ndi chisamaliro chimene ndinafunikira pogwira ntchito yanga. Ndinaona kuti Mulungu anayankha mapemphero anga.

Ndipeza Bwino pa Mkhalidwe Wanga

Kuchira kwanga kwafikira pa mlingo wakuti ndimatha kudzutsa mutu, kuutembenuza, ndi kukhala tsonga. Mokondweretsa, ndinayambanso kulankhula bwinobwino. Ndingalembe, kutayipa, kugwiritsa ntchito telefoni yokhala ndi sipika, ndi kujambula mogwiritsira ntchito kamtengo kapakamwa. Zina za zojambula zanga zafika pamalo osonyezera zithunzithunzi zojambulidwa pakamwa. Ndimayenda pa njinga yokhala ndi injini imene ndimawongolera ndi chibwano. Makako a injini amakweza njinga yangayo m’galimoto lathu, ndipo chifukwa cha zimenezi ndikhoza kumka kulikonse kumene ndikufuna.

Ndakhala ndi mavuto ambiri a kupuma—chibayo chimandivuta nthaŵi zonse. Nthaŵi zina ndimafunikira okosijeni usiku. Mu 1984, ndinatsala pang’ono kufa chifukwa cha zovuta za nthenda ina. Ndinaloŵa ndi kutuluka m’chipatala kangapo. Koma kuyambira pamenepo thanzi langa lawongokera. Kuyambira mu 1976, ndinatha kuchita upainiya wothandiza kamodzi kapena kaŵiri pachaka. Koma sindinakhutire. Ndinapitiriza kuganiza za makonzedwe amene ndinali nawo pamene ndinali wachichepere amene anadodometsedwa ndi chipolopolo.

Ndifikira Chonulirapo Changa

Potsirizira pake, pa September 1, 1990, ndinagwirizana ndi ena mu upainiya wanthaŵi yonse, motero ndikumakwaniritsa chikhumbo changa cha paubwana. Mkati mwa miyezi yamphepo pamene kumazizira, ndimachitira umboni mwa kulemba makalata ndi kugwiritsira ntchito telefoni yokhala ndi sipika. Koma pamene kunja kufunda, ndimapitanso ku utumiki wa kunyumba ndi nyumba. M’chaka chonse, ndimachititsa maphunziro a Baibulo ndili panyumba mwa kugwiritsira ntchito telefoni yokhala ndi sipika.

Ndikuyembekezera mwaphamphu mtsogolo mwabwino m’dziko lapansi la Paradaiso pamene Kristu Yesu ndi Yehova Mulungu adzandiwonjola pa njinga imeneyi. Ndimathokoza Yehova tsiku lililonse chifukwa cha malonjezo ake a thanzi lolimba ndi kukhoza ‘kutumpha ngati nswala.’ (Yesaya 35:6) Ndidzathamanga kufikira pamene ndidzathera pobwezera nthaŵi yonse imene sindinathe kuthamanga, ndiyeno ndidzaphunzira kukwera kavalo.

Poyembekezera nthaŵiyo, ndili ndi chimwemwe chosatheka kuchifotokoza ngakhale tsopano pa kukhala mmodzi wa anthu achimwemwe a Yehova ndi kukhala ndi phande lokwanira mu utumiki.—Yosimbidwa ndi Gloria Williams.

[Chithunzi patsamba 15]

Utumiki wanga Wachikristu— kupita kunyumba ndi nyumba, mwa kuchitira umboni pa telefoni, kulemba makalata

[Chithunzi patsamba 16]

Zojambula zanga zafika pa malo osonyezera zithunzithunzi zojambulidwa pakamwa