Kuchotsa Goli la Kukhulupirira Mizimu

TSOKA linakantha banja langa pamene ndinali msungwana wa zaka 14. Panthaŵi imeneyo, wakupha waukali anayamba kutha anansi anga. Minkhole yake yoyamba anali ana a mkulu wanga​—asanu ndi anayi onsewo. Kenaka iye anatembenukira motsutsana ndi mwamuna wake. Mwamsanga pambuyo pake, iye anapha mmodzi wa akulu anganso. Anayi owonjezereka a abale anga ndi alongo anatsatira, kufikira kokha amayi anga ndi ine tinatsala. Kalanga ine, ndinachititsidwa mantha!

Mkati mwa zaka zotsatira, ndinadya, kugwira ntchito, ndi kugona wochititsidwa mantha tsiku ndi tsiku. Ndinadabwa: Kodi ndi liti pamene iye adzakantha? Ndipo ndi ndani amene adzakhala wotsatira​—amayi kapena ine?

Chiyambi Changa

Kuti ndikuthandizeni kumvetsetsa chimene chinachitika pambuyo pake, ndiloleni ndikuuzeni ponena za chiyambi changa. Mu 1917, ndinabadwa monga chiwalo cha fuko la Paramaccaner Bush-Negroe pa chisumbu cha Mtsinje wa Maroni mu Suriname. Makolo anga anali den lowenengre, kapena akapolo othaŵa, omwe anathaŵira mu nkhalango kukatsogoza moyo wovutika koma waufulu. Chabwino, m’chenicheni unali moyo waufulu kuchokera ku ukapolo wa anthu koma osati waufulu kuchoka ku ziwanda.

Tsiku lirilonse moyo m’mudzi wathu unalamuliridwa ndi chiwanda ndi kulambira makolo akale. Kumanga ena ndi matsenga ndi kubweretsa matenda ndi imfa pa anthu anzawo, anthu ena anagwiritsira ntchito wisi, matsenga akuda, kapena iwo anandandalitsa thandizo la koenoe (otchulidwa kuti ku nu, poŵerenga) wovutitsa. Ovutitsa amenewo anakhulupiriridwa kukhala anthu omwe anavutitsidwa ndi ziwalo zawo za banja. Pambuyo pa imfa yawo, iwo anayerekezedwa kubwerera ku banja lawo kukabwezera. M’chenicheni, ngakhale kuli tero, ovutitsa amenewa ali ziwanda zoipitsidwa zomwe zimakakamiza anthu kulambira izo.

Monga chiwalo cha Evangelical Brother Community, tchalitchi cha Protestanti, ndinaphunziranso china chake ponena za Mulungu. Ngakhale kuti ndinasiyidwa m’mdima ponena za mmene ndingamlambirire iye, nkhalango yamvula yondizinga ine inapereka chitsimikiziro chochuluka chakuti ali Wopereka wabwino. Ndikufuna kulambira Mulungu wabwino koma osati mzimu woipa umene umapangitsa kuvutika,’ ndinalingalira. Ndinadziŵa kuti ovutitsa amenewa amasangalala ndi kuzunza minkhole yawo yosafunitsitsa kufikira imfa.

Tangolingalirani mmene ndinachititsidwira mantha kupeza kuti adani abanja lathu anali atatumiza koenoe kwa ife. Ndinali ndi zaka 14 pamene iye ananyamuka pa ulendo wake wakupha. Zaka makumi aŵiri phambu zisanu ndi chimodzi pambuyo pake, Amayi okha ndi ine tinatsala.

Chokumana Nacho Choyamba

Mayi anali wogwira ntchito wolimbika. Tsiku lina, pamene anali kuyenda kupita kumunda wawo, iwo anagwetsedwa pansi ndipo sanathe kuimirira. Koenoe anasankha mayi wanga. Umoyo wawo unafooka ndipo anakhala wakufa ziwalo. Iwo anafunikira thandizo​—thandizo langa. Koma ndinali wogawanika pakati pa chikondi kaamba ka iwo ndi mantha a chiwanda chomwe chinawagwira. Mkati mwa kukantha kwa koenoe, ngakhale kuli tero, Mayi wanga ovutikawo analira chifukwa cha kupweteka koposa kotero kuti sindikanatha kupirira mpang’ono pomwe koma kugoneka mutu wawo pa miyendo panga kaamba ka chitonthozo. Iwo kenaka anakhala bata, koma ndinamva “manja” akupanikiza thupi langa.

Pamene ndinafuna kuthawa, Mayi analira kachiŵirinso. Chotero kaamba ka iwo ndinakhala ndi kupirira chokumana nacho changa choyamba chonjenjemera ndi wakupha ameneyo. Ndinali ndi zaka 40.

Kuvutitsidwa Kowonjezereka

Mayi anafa. Kokha masiku atatu pambuyo pake, ndinamva liwu laubwenzi likunena kuti: “Lintina, Lintina, kodi sukundimva? Ndikukuitana iwe.” Chimenecho chinali chiyambi cha kuvutika kokulira kotero kuti ndinakhumba imfa ya mwamsanga.

Choyamba chiwandacho chinandivutitsa ine kokha pamene ndinapita kukagona. Pamene ndinali pafupi kuwodzera, liwu linandidzutsa, kulankhula ponena za manda ndi imfa. Kutaya tulo kunandipangitsa ine kudzimva wofooka, ngakhale kuti ndinapitirizabe kusamalira ana anga.

Pambuyo pake chiwandacho chinapititsa patsogolo kuvutitsa kwake. Nthaŵi zambiri ndinadzimva ngati kuti chinali kundipotola ine. Ngakhale kuti ndinayesera kuthawa, sindikanatha chifukwa chakuti chinthu cholemetsa chinawoneka kukhala chikusindikiza pa thupi langa. Ndinafuna kufuula koma sindikanatha kutulutsa mawu. Komabe, ndinakana kulambira wondivutitsa wanga.

Pambuyo pa kuchira kwa kuvutitsidwa kuli konse, ndinapitirizabe kulima, kubzyala chinangwa ndi mizimbe ndi kugulitsa izo pa msika wa tauni yaying’ono ya ku gombe. Icho chinakhala chopepuka kupeza ndalama, koma kuvutika kwanga kokulira kunali kutsogolo.

Kufufuza Kaamba ka Kuchiritsa

Tsiku lina ndinamva liwu la chiwanda losonyeza kuti choipa chinachake chiri pafupi kuchitika lonena kuti, “Ndidzapanga mimba yako kutupa ngati mpira.” Nthaŵi ina pambuyo pake, panali m’bulu wolimba m’mimba mwanga womwe unakula kufikira ndinawoneka ngati ndiri ndi pakati. Wochititsidwa mantha kwenikweni, ndinadabwa: ‘Kodi Mulungu, Mlengi, angandithandize ine kuthamangitsa koenoe? Kodi Iye angatumize mzimu wabwino wamphamvu kuthamangitsa iye?’ Kuti ndipeze yankho, ndinapita kwa bonoeman, sing’anga.

Sing’anga woyamba anandipatsa ine tapoes, kapena zithumwa, koma chotupacho chinakhalirirabe. Wofunitsitsa kupeza kuchiritsa, ndinapita kwa bonoeman uyu ndi uyo​—mzonse wopanda thandizo. Pakati pa maulendo amenewo, ndinapitirizabe kulima kuti ndipeze ndalama zogulira mowa, vinyo, champagne (vinyo wapadera kwawoko), ndi nsalu za mu mchuuno kulipira asing’angawo. Nthaŵi zambiri iwo anandichenjeza: “Gwada pansi kaamba ka koenoe. Mupemphe iye monga mbuye wako. Mlambire iye, ndipo adzakusiya.” Koma kodi ndimotani mmene ndikanagwada kaamba ka mzimu umene unandivutitsa ine ndi kufuna kundipha? Sindikanatero.

Komabe, kaamba ka kuvutitsidwa ndinachita chirichonse chimene asing’angawo anandiuza kuchita. Mmodzi wa iwo anandithandiza ine kwa miyezi isanu. Iye anandisambitsa ine ndi mankhwala ndi kusiya madzi a zitsamba 11 zosiyanasiyana m’maso mwanga​—“kuwayeretsa iwo,” iye anatero pamene ndinalira chifukwa chakupweteka. Koma pamapeto akuthandizidwako, ndinapita kunyumba wopanda ndalama, wovutitsidwa, ndipo wodwala kuposa mmene ndinaliri.

“Awa ndi Mapeto Ako”

Mmodzi wa ana anga a amuna, yemwe amakhala mu Netherlands, anatumiza ndalama kwa ine kuti ndipitirize kufunafuna thandizo. Chotero ndinapita kwa dokotala wa mankhwala mu mzinda waukulu. Pambuyo pa kufufuzafufuza, iye anati: “Sindingathe kukuthandiza. Pita ukawonane ndi bonoeman.” Chotero ndinayesera kwa wolankhula ndi mizimu wa ku East Indian​—koma kachiŵirinso mopanda thandizo. Ndinayenda kupita kunyumba koma ndinangofika kokha pa mzinda waukulu, kumene ndinafika kunyumba ya mmodzi wa ana anga a akazi. Pamenepo ndinagwa​—wopanda ndalama ndi kudwala. Mopanda thandizo, ndinali nditatha zaka 17 ndi 15,000 guilders ($8,300, U.S.) kufunafuna kaamba ka kuchiritsa. Ndinali ndi zaka 57.

Kenaka, chiwandacho chinawopsyeza: “Ndatopa ndi iwe. Awa ndi mapeto ako.”

“Koma sindiwe Mulungu, sindiwe Yesu,” ndinalira.

“Ngakhale Mulungu sangandiletse ine,” chiwandacho chinayankha. “Masiku ako aŵerengedwa.”

Kulimbana Komaliza

Milungu ina inapita. Meena, mnansi wamkazi yemwe anali mtumiki wa nthaŵi zonse wa Mboni za Yehova, anafunsa mwana wanga wamkazi ponena za mkhalidwe wanga ndi kunena: “Mayi wako angathandizidwe kokha ndi Baibulo.” Ndikumva kukambitsiranako, ndinayenda kwa iwo. Ndisanafike kwa iwo, ngakhale kuli tero, ndinagwetsedwa pansi. Meena mofulumira anabwera ndi kunena kuti: “Chiwanda chimenecho sichidzakusiyani. Mmodzi yekha amene angakuthandizeni inu ali Yehova, palibe wina aliyense.” Kenaka iye anapemphera ndi ine kwa Yehova Mulungu ndikuyamba kundichezera. Koma pamene maulendo ake anachulukira kwa ine, kuvutitsa kwa chiwandako kunakhala kowopsya. Mkati mwa usiku, thupi langa linanjenjemera mochititsa mantha kotero kuti palibe wina aliyense mnyumbamo akanatha kugona. Ndinasiya kudya ndipo ndinali ndi nthaŵi pamene ndinataya malingaliro anga kotheratu.

Mkhalidwe wanga unakhala woipitsitsa kotero kuti ana anga anabwera kuchokera mkati kudzanditenga ine kubwerera kumudzi kuti ndikafe. Pokhala wofooka kwambiri kuti ndiyende, ndinakana. Koma ndikumamva kuti imfa ikuyandikira, ndinaitana Mboniyo kudzaitsanzika. Meena analongosola kuchokera mu Baibulo kuti ngakhale ngati ndifa, pali chiyembekezo cha chiukiriro.

“Chiukiriro? Nchiyani chimene ukutanthauza?”

“Mulungu angakuukitseni ku moyo mu Paradaiso,” iye anayankha. Kuwala kwa chiyembekezo!

Koma usiku womwewo chiwanda chinandigwira. M’kamphindi, ndinawoneka kukhala ndikumuwona koenoe akutsatiridwa ndi khamu la anthu. Iye anachita chiphwete: “Iye akuganiza kuti adzaukitsidwa.” Kenaka khamulo linaseka pwepwete. Koma kenaka ndinachita china chake sindinachite ndi kale lonse. Ndinaitana: “Yehova! Yehova!” Chimenecho ndi chokha chimene ndikudziŵa kuti ndinanena. Ndipo chiwandacho chinachoka!

Ana anga anabweranso ndi kundipempha: “Mama, musafere mu mzinda. Tiloleni ife tikutengeni inu kumudzi wanu.” Ndinakana, popeza ndinafuna kuphunzira zowonjezereka ponena za Yehova. “Chabwino, mwinamwake ndidzafabe,” ndinauza iwo, “koma mwinamwake panthaŵiyo ndidzakhala nditatumikira Mlengi.”

Monga Linga Lolimba

Meena ndi Mboni zina zinapitiriza kundichezera. Iwo anandiphunzitsa ine kupemphera kwa Yehova. Pakati pa zinthu zina, iwo anandiuza ine ponena za nkhani pakati pa Yehova ndi Satana ndi mmene Mdyerekezi anabweretsera kuvutika pa Yobu kufuna kuti akane Mulungu. Kuphunzira zinthu izi kunalimbikitsa chitsimikizo changa kusalambira chiwanda. Mbonizo zinaŵerenga lemba lomwe linakhala lokondedwa kwa ine: “Dzina la Yehova ndi linga lolimba; wolungama athamangiramo napulumuka.”​—Miyambo 18:10.

Pang’onopang’ono mphamvu zanga zinabwerera. Pamene mwana wanga anabwera, ndinamuuza iye kudikira kunja. Ndinavala ndi kupisira bulauzi yanga mu siketi yanga kusonyeza kuti chotupacho chinali chikutha. Kenaka ndinayenda panja.

“Kodi awa ndi Amayi Lintina?” mwana wanga wamwamuna anafuula.

“Inde, ndine​—ayamikidwe Yehova, Mulungu wanga!”

Kutenga Kaimidwe Kanga

Kuyambira panthaŵi imene ndinakhoza kuyenda pang’ono, ndinapita ku Nyumba ya Ufumu ya Mboni za Yehova. Kumeneko ndinalandira chilimbikitso chochuluka kuchokera kwa mabwenzi kotero kuti sindinaleke kupezeka pa misonkhano. Miyezi yochepa pambuyo pake, ndinatsagana ndi Mbonizo mu ntchito yolalikira poyera. Mwamsanga pambuyo pake, ndinabatizidwa ndi kukhala mtumiki wa Yehova, Mpulumutsi wanga wokondedwa. Ndinali ndi zaka 58.

Komabe, china chake chinatsalira kuti chichitidwe. Zaka zambiri kumayambiriro, kubwerera mu kanyumba kanga ka kumudzi, ndinali ndinamanga guwa la nsembe pa limene ndinaperekapo nsembe kwa makolo anga akale. Kuti ndikhale woyera mwauzimu, ndinayenera kuwononga ilo. Ndinafunsa Yehova kaamba ka thandizo, popeza kachitidwe kanga kakanapangitsa mkangano pakati pa anthu a m’mudzi. Pamene ndinafika ku kanyumba kanga ndinatsegula chitseko, wina wake anafuula: “Pingos!” (Nguluŵe!) Gulu la nyama linali kuwoloka chisumbucho ndi kulumphira m’madzi kusambira kudutsa mtsinje. Mwamsanga, ponse paŵiri achichepere ndi achikulire anachoka m’mudzimo kaamba ka kugwira kosavuta kumeneko. Mosangalatsidwa, ndinagona pansi ndi kuthokoza Yehova kaamba ka chochitika ichi. Mwamsanga, ndinakokera guwa la nsembelo kunja, kuthira parafini pa ilo ndi kuliyatsa. Guwalo linapsya anthuwo asanabwerere. Ndithudi, iwo anadzapeza chimene chinachitika, koma palibe china chirichonse chinakachitidwa ponena za icho mpang’ono pomwe. Chotero, ndi mtendere wa maganizo, ndinabwerera ku mzinda.

Kuchokera ku Chisoni Kufika ku Chimwemwe

Madalitso ambiri anali m’njira yanga. Mwana wanga wamwamuna wa ku Netherlands sanakhulupirire nkhani zimene anamva ponena za ine ndipo anakwera ndege kupita ku Suriname kudzadziwonera yekha. Iye anali wachimwemwe kuwona kuti ndinali waumoyo wabwino kotero kuti iye anandigulira nyumba yabwino mu mzinda waukulu, kumene ndikukhala tsopano. Ndikusintha kotani nanga kumene ndakumana nako​—kuchokera ku ukapolo wopanda ndalama wa ziwanda kufika ku mtumiki wosamaliridwa bwino wa Yehova!

Zaka khumi ndi chimodzi pambuyo pa ubatizo wanga, ndinali ndi chifukwa chowonjezereka cha kukhalira woyamikira. Mofulumizidwa ndi madalitso ambiri amene ndinalandira, atatu a ana anga ndi mmodzi wa mpongozi wanga wamwamuna anafikira kukhala osangalatsidwa mu chowonadi cha Baibulo ndipo kenaka anapereka miyoyo yawo kwa Yehova Mulungu. Ndipo kwanthaŵi ndi nthaŵi, ndakhala ndikukamba chokumana nacho changa cha mizimu pamene abale ndi alongo anditenga ine limodzi nawo kukawona ophunzira nawo Baibulo awo omwe amasowa kulimba mtima kwa kuchoka ku kugwidwa ndi ziwanda. M’njira imeneyo ngakhale zaka zowopsya zimenezo zakhala zikugwiritsiridwa ntchito mu ntchito ya kulalikira Ufumu.

Ndikusowa mawu oyenerera kulongosola chiyamikiro changa kwa Yehova, Mulungu wanga. Ndithudi, ndawona dzanja lake lamphamvu m’malo mwanga. Ndithudi, Yehova wakhala wabwino kwa ine!​—Yerekezani ndi Masalmo 18:17-19.

[Chithunzi patsamba 7]

M’kuchoka ku kukhulupirira mizimu, Lintina van Geenen anaphunzira kuti “dzina la Yehova liri linga lolimba”

[Chithunzi patsamba 9]

Dziko la mkati mwa Suriname kumene anthu ambiri ali akapolo ku kukhulupirira mizimu