Achichepere Akufunsa Kuti

Kutaya Mimba—Kodi Ndiko Yankho?

“Pamene zotulukapo za kupimidwa kwanga zinasonyeza kuti ndinali ndi mimba,” akukumbukira motero Judy, “bwenzi langa lachinyamata panthaŵi yomweyo linaumirira kuti nditaye mimbayo. Ndipo linandipatsa ndi ndalama zake.” Judy anali ndi zaka 17.a

PAMENE Marta wa zaka 15 anadziŵa kuti anali ndi mimba, anakalankhula ndi phungu wamkazi kukiliniki yochotsa mimba. “Iye anandifotokozera zonse,” akutero Marta. “Anandiuza kuti ndingachotsetse mimbayo, kapena kuti angandithandize kupeza gulu lolera ana kapena chipatala chosamalira anakubala osakwatiwa okhala ndi pathupi, ngati ndinafuna zimenezo.”

Atsikana oposa miliyoni imodzi amatenga mimba chaka chilichonse mu United States mokha. Pakati pawo palinso atsikana amene, ngakhale anaphunzitsidwa mwa Chikristu, aswa lamulo la Mulungu lakuti “mudzipatule kudama,” kapena kugonana ukwati usanakhale. (1 Atesalonika 4:3) Chisembwere chimenechi chimadzetsa mavuto ochuluka. Komabe, ambiri mwa atsikana ameneŵa amadzachita chisoni ndi khalidwe lawo ndipo amafuna kuwongolera moyo wawo. Koma poyang’anizana ndi chiyembekezo chowopsa cha kukhala ndi mwana wapathengo, ena angaganize kuti kutaya mimba kungakhale yankho losavuta pa mavuto awo. Ndi iko komwe, chaka chilichonse pafupifupi theka la miliyoni la atsikana amimba ku United States amasankha kutaya mimba. Kodi zimenezi zingakhaledi yankho labwino koposa pa mimba yosafunika?

Chifukwa Chake Ena Amataya Mimba

Zoona, malingaliro amphamvu, ngakhale owombana angakhale ndi chisonkhezero. Mtsikana adzakhalabe ndi chikondi chachibadwa pa mwana yemwe akukula m’mimba mwake, koma angakhalenso ndi mantha ndi nkhaŵa zomveka.

Mwachitsanzo, Vicky wa zaka 18 “anafuna kupita ku koleji, mwina ngakhale kupeza digiri ya master.” Malinga ndi kuganiza kwake, kukhala ndi mwana kukadodometsa zolinga zake. (Magazini a ’Teen, March 1992) Mofananamo Marta anati: “Ngati ndiwe nakubala, umakhala panyumba ndi mwana wako ndipo sukulu imangothera pamenepo. Sindinali wokonzekera zimenezo.” Malinga ndi kufufuza kwina, 87 peresenti ya atsikana amene amataya mimba amawopa kuti kukhala ndi mwana kudzasinthiratu moyo wawo mwa njira imene sali okonzekera kuilandira.

Kuwopa mavuto a zachuma ndi nkhaŵa yakuti munthu sadzakhoza kusamalira mathayo monga kholo lokha zilinso zifukwa zofala zimene ena amasankhira kutaya mimba. Vicky ananena motere: “Ndinachokera m’banja limene makolo anga anasudzulana, ndipo amayi analera okha ana awo atatu. Ndinkawaona akuvutika . . . Ndingoganiza kuti nanenso ndidzakhala kholo lokha monga amayi.”

Kukakamiza kwa ena, makamaka bwenzi lachinyamata, kungasonkhezerenso munthu kutaya mimba. Bwenzi lachinyamata la Judy linampatsa chosankha: “Ngati sudzataya mimba, sindidzafunanso kukuona.” Kwa Nancy amene anamkakamiza kutaya mimba anali amake limodzi ndi achibale ena.

Lingaliro lofala lakuti kutaya mimba sikupha khanda kwenikweni lilinso ndi chisonkhezero champhamvu. Vicky akuti: “Sindinafune kuganiza za mimbayo kukhala khanda. . . . Ndinaŵerenga kuti panthaŵi imene mimba ili ya milungu isanu, mluza umakhala waung’ono kuposa chikhadabo cha kuchala chanu chakaninse. Simungathe kukhulupirira mmene ndinaumirira pa lingaliro limenelo. Ndinaganiza kuti ngati ukulu wake uli chabe ngati chikhadabo cha chala chakaninse, ndiye kuti silinali khanda kwenikweni. Ndinayesa kuzichotsa m’maganizo mwanga kuti ndingotaya mimba basi.”

Ena amanenanso kuti, m’maiko otukuka, kutaya mimba kuli kotetezerekako—mwina kotetezereka kuposa kuona mwana kwa mtsikana wokhala mpathupi. Zonse zitalingaliridwa, pamenepo kutaya mimba kungaonedwe kukhala koyenera. Komabe, maumboni amasonyeza kuti ambiri amene amasankha kutaya mimba amadzachita chisoni pambuyo pake. Mkazi wina akuti: “Ndinataya mimba pamene ndinali ndi zaka 20. Tsopano ndili ndi zaka 34, ndipo nkovuta kuiŵala zimene ndinachita. Ndinafuna mwana wanga, koma bwenzi langa lachinyamata silinamfune. Ndikali kuvutika mtima; umapwetekedwa mtima kwa moyo wako wonse.”

Kusweka Mtima

M’malo mokhala njira yosavuta, kutaya mimba kungawonjezere mavuto a munthu. Makamaka, kumasemphana ndi nzeru yathu ya chabwino ndi choipa—chikumbumtima chimene Mulungu anaika mwa anthu. (Aroma 2:15) Ndiponso, kutaya mimba kumafuna kuti mtsikana atsekereze chikondi chake chochuluka pa kamoyo kamene kakukula mwa iye. (Yerekezerani ndi 1 Yohane 3:17.) Ndi zoziziritsa m’nkhongono chotani nanga!

Marta akuti: “Sipanapite ngakhale milungu ingapo [pambuyo potaya mimba] pamene ndinayamba kumva liwongo ndi manyazi pa zimene ndinachita.” Zinthu zinafikadi poipa pamene February anafika—mwezi umene khandalo likanabadwa. Eliasa akukumbukira: “Zaka khumi ndi zisanu zapitazo ndinataya mimba. Pambuyo pake, ndinachita tondovi kowopsa ndipo ndinkachita kukachiritsidwa kukiliniki ina nthaŵi zambiri. Ndinafuna ngakhale kudzipha.”

Zoona, si atsikana onse amene amachita motere. Ambiri amakhulupiriradi kuti mluza suli moyo wa munthu. Koma kodi Mlengi—“chitsime cha moyo”—amanenanji pankhaniyi? (Salmo 36:9) Baibulo limafotokoza bwino kuti kwa Yehova Mulungu, mwana wosabadwa womakula m’mimba sali chabe minofu ya mluza. Iye anauzira Mfumu Davide kulemba: “Maso anu anaona ngakhale mluza wanga, ndipo m’buku lanu ziŵalo zake zonse zinalembedwamo.” (Salmo 139:16, NW) Motero Mlengi amaonadi mluza monga munthu payekha, munthu wamoyo. Nchifukwa chake, ananena kuti munthu akaimbidwa mlandu ngati wapweteka mwana wosabadwa. (Eksodo 21:22, 23) Inde, kwa Mulungu, kupha mwana wosabadwa ndi kuphadi moyo wa munthu. Chifukwa chake, mtsikana amene akufuna kukondweretsa Mulungu sangalingalire za kutaya mimba kukhala chosankha chabwino—ngakhale ngati ena angamkakamize.b

Kupeza Chichirikizo

Judy, wotchulidwa poyambayo, anasankha kusataya mimba. Iye akuti: “Achemwali anga anadziŵa, ndipo kuchokera nthaŵi yomweyo, anandichirikiza, makamaka kulimbitsa mtima wanga. Ananenadi kuti akapitiriza kundichirikiza nditaona mwanayo. Nzomwezo basi zimene ndinafuna kumva kuti ndichite zimene ndinaona kukhala zabwino pansi pa mtima wanga. Ndinapitiriza kukonzekera ndipo ndinabala mwanayo.” Zimenezo zinali zaka zisanu ndi zinayi zapita. Poyang’ana mwana wake wamwamuna wa zaka zisanu ndi zitatu, Judy akuti: “Kuchotsetsa mimba kukanakhala kulakwa kwakukulu m’moyo wanga.”

Mtsikana wina wotchedwa Natisa mofananamo akusimba: “Zaka zisanu zapitazo ndinali khale m’kiliniki yochotsera mimba, ndikuyembekezera nthaŵi yanga. M’malo mokaonana ndi dokotala pamene nthaŵi yanga inafika, ndinaganizanso ndi kutuluka m’kilinikimo. Tsopano ndili ndi mwana wamwamuna wabwino kwambiri wa zaka zinayi, ndikuyembekezeranso mwana wina, ndipo ndine wokwatiwa kwa tate wachikondi.”

Aliyense wotenga mimba yapathengo sayenera kufulumira kupanga chosankha. Ngakhale kuti zinthu zingaoneke kukhala zoipa kwambiri, musataye chiyembekezo. Koma kunena zoona afunikira chichirikizo ndi chitsogozo cha achikulire. Kupatsa mtima wa munthuwe kwa makolo ako ndiko chiyambi chabwino, makamaka ngati ali Akristu. (Miyambo 23:26) Zoona, iwo poyamba adzavutika mtima ndi kukwiya. Komabe, m’kupita kwa nthaŵi, iwo mosakayikira adzakakamizika kuthandiza. Mwachitsanzo, iwo angalinganize kuti mukalandire chisamaliro kuchipatala musanaone mwana. Ndiponso angathandize kupeza maprogramu a boma alionse amene alipo kaamba ka owayenerera. Chofunika koposa nchakuti, angalimbikitse wolakwayo kupeza chithandizo chofunikira chauzimu kwa akulu a mpingo.—Yakobo 5:14, 15.

Anakubala ena osakwatiwa asankha kupereka ana awo ku magulu olera ana, poganiza kuti sangathe kuchitira khandalo zofunika zonse. Pamene kuli kwakuti kupereka mwana ku magulu olera kulipo bwino kuposa kupha mwanayo, Mulungu amaona kholo kukhala ndi thayo la ‘kudzisungira mbumba yake ya iye yekha.’ (1 Timoteo 5:8) Mwina kholo limodzi silingakhoze kupatsa mwanayo zonse zofunikira zakuthupi, koma likhoza kumpatsa kanthu kofunika kwambiri—chikondi. (Miyambo 15:17) Chotero, nthaŵi zambiri, ndi bwino kwa nakubala wosakwatiwa kudzilerera mwanayo.

Bwanji ponena za ntchito yolera khanda—ndi masinthidwe aakulu m’moyo amene mosakayikira adzafunikira kupangidwa? Zonsezi zingaoneke kukhala zothetsa mphamvu. Komabe, Baibulo limapereka uphungu wogwira ntchito umene ungathandize anthu kulimbana ndi zovuta zimenezi. Anakubala osakwatiwa olapa angapindulenso ndi chithandizo chauzimu chozikidwa zolimba pa Mawu a Mulungu. Inde, ndi chichirikizo chachikondi ndi chitsogozo choyenera, iwo angathe kuchita bwino koposa ndi mkhalidwewo.c Kutaya mimba sindiko yankho ayi!

[Mawu a M’munsi]

[Chithunzi patsamba 29]

Mabwenzi achinyamata amayesa kukakamiza atsikana kutaya mimba